One day in the second week of October-by then the oaks and elms on Kossuth Street were a riot of gold and red-I once more visited the defunct West Side Rec. No self-respecting real estate bounty hunter would fail to fully investigate the possibilities of such a prime site, and I asked several people on the street what it was like inside (the door was padlocked, of course) and when it had closed.
One of the people I spoke to was Doris Dunning. Pretty as a picture, Chaz Frati had said. A generally meaningless cliche, but true in this case. The years had put fine lines around her eyes and deeper ones at the corners of her mouth, but she had exquisite skin and a terrific full-breasted figure (in 1958, the heyday of Jayne Mansfield, full b.r.e.a.s.t.s are considered attractive rather than embarra.s.sing). We spoke on the stoop. To invite me in with the house empty and the kids at school would have been improper and no doubt the subject of neighborly gossip, especially with her husband "living out." She had a dustrag in one hand and a cigarette in the other. There was a bottle of furniture polish poking out of her ap.r.o.n pocket. Like most folks in Derry, she was polite but distant.
Yes, she said, when it was still up and running, West Side Rec had been a fine facility for the kiddos. It was so nice to have a place like that close by where they could go after school and race around to their hearts" content. She could see the playground and the basketball court from her kitchen window, and it was very sad to see them empty. She said she thought the Rec had been closed in a round of budget cuts, but the way her eyes shifted and her mouth tucked in suggested something else to me: that it had been closed during the round of child-murders and disappearances. Budget concerns might have been secondary.
I thanked her and handed her one of my recently printed business cards. She took it, gave me a distracted smile, and closed the door. It was a gentle close, not a slam, but I heard a rattle from behind it and knew she was putting on the chain.
I thought the Rec might do for my purposes when Halloween came, although I didn"t completely love it. I antic.i.p.ated no problems getting inside, and one of the front windows would give me a fine view of the street. Dunning might come in his car rather than on foot, but I knew what it looked like. It would be after dark, according to Harry"s essay, but there were streetlights.
Of course, that visibility thing cut both ways. Unless he was totally fixated on what he"d come to do, Dunning would almost certainly see me running at him. I had the pistol, but it was only dead accurate up to fifteen yards. I"d need to be even closer before I dared risk a shot, because on Halloween night, Kossuth Street was sure to be alive with pint-sized ghosts and goblins. Yet I couldn"t wait until he actually got in the house before breaking cover, because according to the essay, Doris Dunning"s estranged husband had gone to work right away. By the time Harry came out of the bathroom, all of them were down and all but Ellen were dead. If I waited, I was apt to see what Harry had seen: his mother"s brains soaking into the couch.
I hadn"t traveled across more than half a century to save just one of them. And so what if he saw me coming? I was the man with the gun, he was the man with the hammer-probably filched from the tool drawer at his boardinghouse. If he ran at me, that would be good. I"d be like a rodeo clown, distracting the bull. I"d caper and yell until he got in range, then put two in his chest.
a.s.suming I was able to pull the trigger, that was.
And a.s.suming the gun worked. I"d test-fired it in a gravel pit on the outskirts of town, and it seemed fine . . . but the past is obdurate.
It doesn"t want to change.
4.
Upon further consideration, I thought there might be an even better location for my Halloween-night stakeout. I"d need a little luck, but maybe not too much. G.o.d knows there"s plenty for sale in these parts, bartender Fred Toomey had said on my first night in Derry. My explorations had borne that out. In the wake of the murders (and the big flood of "57, don"t forget that), it seemed that half the town was for sale. In a less standoffish burg, a supposed real-estate buyer like myself probably would have been given a key to the city and a wild weekend with Miss Derry by now.
One street I hadn"t checked out was Wyemore Lane, a block south of Kossuth Street. That meant the Wyemore backyards would abut on Kossuth backyards. It couldn"t hurt to check.
Though 206 Wyemore, the house directly behind the Dunnings", was occupied, the one next to it on the left-202-looked like an answered prayer. The gray paint was fresh and the shingles were new, but the shutters were closed up tight. On the freshly raked lawn was a yellow-and-green sign I"d seen all over town: FOR SALE BY DERRY HOME REAL ESTATE SPECIALISTS. This one invited me to call Specialist Keith Haney and discuss financing. I had no intention of doing that, but I parked my Sunliner in the newly asphalted driveway (someone was going all-out to sell this one) and walked into the backyard, head up, shoulders back, big as Billy-be-d.a.m.ned. I had discovered many things while exploring my new environment, and one of them was that if you acted like you belonged in a certain place, people thought you did.
The backyard was nicely mowed, the leaves raked away to showcase the velvety green. A push lawnmower had been stored under the garage overhang with a swatch of green tarpaulin tucked neatly over the rotary blades. Beside the cellar bulkhead was a doghouse with a sign on it that showed Keith Haney at his don"t-miss-a-trick best: YOUR POOCH BELONGS HERE. Inside was a pile of unused leaf-bags with a garden trowel and a pair of hedge clippers to hold them down. In 2011, the tools would have been locked away; in 1958, someone had taken care to see they were out of the rain and called it good. I was sure the house was locked, but that was okay. I had no interest in breaking and entering.
At the far end of 202 Wyemore"s backyard was a hedge about six feet tall. Not quite as tall as I was, in other words, and although it was luxuriant, a man could force his way through easily enough if he didn"t mind a few scratches. Best of all, when I walked down to the far right corner, which was behind the garage, I was able to look on a diagonal into the backyard of the Dunning house. I saw two bicycles. One was a boy"s Schwinn, leaning on its kickstand. The other, lying on its side like a dead pony, was Ellen Dunning"s. There was no mistaking the training wheels.
There was also a litter of toys. One of them was Harry Dunning"s Daisy air rifle.
5.
If you"ve ever acted in an amateur stage company-or directed student theatricals, which I had several times while at LHS-you"ll know what the days leading up to Halloween were like for me. At first, rehearsals have a lazy feel. There"s improvisation, joking, horseplay, and a good deal of flirting as s.e.xual polarities are established. If someone flubs a line or misses a cue in those early rehearsals, it"s an occasion for laughter. If an actor shows up fifteen minutes late, he or she might get a mild reprimand, but probably nothing more.
Then opening night begins to seem like an actual possibility instead of a foolish dream. Improv falls away. So does the horseplay, and although the jokes remain, the laughter that greets them has a nervous energy that was missing before. Flubbed lines and missed cues begin to seem exasperating rather than amusing. An actor arriving late for rehearsal once the sets are up and opening night is only days away is apt to get a serious reaming from the director.
The big night comes. The actors put on their costumes and makeup. Some are outright terrified; all feel not quite prepared. Soon they will have to face a roomful of people who have come to see them strut their stuff. What seemed distant in the days of bare-stage blocking has come after all. And before the curtain goes up, some Hamlet, w.i.l.l.y Loman, or Blanche DuBois will have to rush into the nearest bathroom and be sick. It never fails.
Trust me on the sickness part. I know.
6.
In the small hours of Halloween morning, I found myself not in Derry but on the ocean. A stormy ocean. I was clinging to the rail of a large vessel-a yacht, I think-that was on the verge of foundering. Rain driven by a howling gale was sheeting into my face. Huge waves, black at their bases and a curdled, foamy green on top, rushed toward me. The yacht rose, twisted, then plummeted down again with a wild corks.c.r.e.w.i.n.g motion.
I woke from this dream with my heart pounding and my hands still curled from trying to hold onto the rail my brain had dreamed up. Only it wasn"t just my brain, because the bed was still going up and down. My stomach seemed to have come unmoored from the muscles that were supposed to hold it in place.
At such moments, the body is almost always wiser than the brain. I threw back the covers and sprinted for the bathroom, kicking over the hateful yellow chair as I sped through the kitchen. My toes would be sore later, but right then I barely felt it. I tried to lock my throat shut, but only partially succeeded. I could hear a weird sound seeping through it and into my mouth. Ulk-ulk-urp-ulk was what it sounded like. My stomach was the yacht, first rising and then taking those horrible corkscrew drops. I fell on my knees in front of the toilet and threw up my dinner. Next came lunch and yesterday"s breakfast: oh G.o.d, ham and eggs. At the thought of all that shining grease, I retched again. There was a pause, and then what felt like everything I"d eaten for the last week left the building.
Just as I began to hope it was over, my bowels gave a terrible liquid wrench. I stumbled to my feet, batted down the toilet ring, and managed to sit before everything fell out in a watery splat.
But no. Not everything, not yet. My stomach took another giddy heave just as my bowels went to work again. There was only one thing to do, and I did it: leaned forward and vomited into the sink.
It went on like that until noon of Halloween day. By then both of my ejection-ports were producing nothing but watery gruel. Each time I threw up, each time my bowels cramped, I thought the same thing: The past does not want to be changed. The past is obdurate.
But when Frank Dunning arrived tonight, I meant to be there. Even if I was still heaving and s.h.i.tting graywater, I meant to be there. Even if it killed me, I meant to be there.
7.
Mr. Norbert Keene, proprietor of the Center Street Drug, was behind the counter when I came in on that Friday afternoon. The wooden paddle-fan over his head lifted what remained of his hair in a wavery dance: cobwebs in a summer breeze. Just looking at that made my abused stomach give another warning lurch. He was skinny inside his white cotton smock-almost emaciated-and when he saw me coming, his pale lips creased in a smile.
"You look a little under the weather, my friend."
"Kaopectate," I said in a hoa.r.s.e voice that didn"t sound like my own. "Do you have it?" Wondering if it had even been invented yet.
"Are we suffering a little touch of the bug?" The overhead light caught in the lenses of his small rimless spectacles and skated around when he moved his head. Like b.u.t.ter across a skillet, I thought, and at that my stomach gave another lunge. "It"s been going around town. You"re in for a nasty twenty-four hours, I"m afraid. Probably a germ, but you may have used a public convenience and forgotten to wash your hands. So many people are lazy about th-"
"Do you have Kaopectate or not?"
"Of course. Second aisle."
"Continence pants-what about those?"
The thin-lipped grin spread out. Continence pants are funny, of course they are. Unless, of course, you"re the one who needs them. "Fifth aisle. Although if you stay close to home, you won"t need them. Based on your pallor, sir . . . and the way you"re sweating . . . it might be wiser to do that."
"Thanks," I said, and imagined socking him square in the mouth and knocking his dentures down his throat. Suck on a little Polident, pal.
I shopped slowly, not wanting to joggle my liquefied guts any more than necessary. Got the Kaopectate (Large Economy Size? check), then the continence pants (Adult Large? check). The pants were in Ostomy Supplies, between the enema bags and brooding yellow coils of plastic hose whose function I didn"t want to know about. There were also adult diapers, but at those I balked. If necessary, I would stuff the continence pants with dish towels. This struck me as funny, and despite my misery I had to struggle not to laugh. Laughing in my current delicate state might bring on disaster.
As if sensing my distress, the skeletal druggist rang up my items in slow motion. I paid him, holding out a five-dollar bill with a hand that was shaking appreciably.
"Anything else?"
"Just one thing. I"m miserable, you can see I"m miserable, so why the h.e.l.l are you grinning at me?"
Mr. Keene took a step backward, the smile falling from his lips. "I a.s.sure you, I wasn"t grinning. I certainly hope you feel better."
My bowels cramped. I staggered a little, grabbing the paper bag with my stuff inside it and holding onto the counter with my free hand. "Do you have a bathroom?"
The smile reappeared. "Not for customers, I"m afraid. Why not try one of the . . . the establishments across the street?"
"You"re quite the b.a.s.t.a.r.d, aren"t you? The perfect G.o.ddam Derry citizen."
He stiffened, then turned away and stalked into the nether regions where his pills, powders, and syrups were kept.
I walked slowly past the soda fountain and out the door. I felt like a man made of gla.s.s. The day was cool, no more than forty-five degrees, but the sun felt hot on my skin. And sticky. My bowels cramped again. I stood stock-still for a moment with my head down, one foot on the sidewalk and one in the gutter. The cramp pa.s.sed. I crossed the street without looking for traffic, and someone honked at me. I restrained myself from flipping the bird at the honker, but only because I had enough trouble. I couldn"t risk getting into a fight; I was in one already.
The cramp struck again, a double knife to the lower gut. I broke into a run. The Sleepy Silver Dollar was closest, so that was the door I jerked open, hustling my unhappy body into semidarkness and the yeasty smell of beer. On the jukebox, Conway Twitty was moaning that it was only make-believe. I wished he were right.
The place was empty except for one patron sitting at an empty table, looking at me with startled eyes, and the bartender leaning at the end of the stick, doing the crossword puzzle in the daily paper. He looked up at me.
"Bathroom," I said. "Quick."
He pointed to the back, and I sprinted toward the doors marked BUOYS and GULLS. I straight-armed BUOYS like a fullback looking for open field to run in. The place stank of s.h.i.t, cigarette smoke, and eye-watering chlorine. The single toilet stall had no door, which was probably good. I tore my pants open like Superman late for a bank robbery, turned, and dropped.
Just in time.
When the latest throe had pa.s.sed, I took the giant bottle of Kaopectate out of the paper bag and chugged three long swallows. My stomach heaved. I fought it back into place. When I was sure the first dose was going to stay down, I slugged another one, belched, and slowly screwed the cap back into place. On the wall to my left, someone had drawn a p.e.n.i.s and t.e.s.t.i.c.l.es. The t.e.s.t.i.c.l.es were split open, and blood was gushing from them. Below this charming image, the artist had written: HENRY CASTONGUAY NEXT TIME YOU f.u.c.k MY WIFE THIS IS WHAT YOU GET.
I closed my eyes, and when I did, I saw the startled patron who had watched my charge to the bathroom. But was he a patron? There had been nothing on his table; he had just been sitting there. With my eyes closed, I could see that face clearly. It was one I knew.
When I went back into the bar, Ferlin Husky had replaced Conway Twitty, and No Suspenders was gone. I went to the bartender and said, "There was a guy sitting over there when I came in. Who was it?"
He looked up from his puzzle. "I didn"t see no one."
I took out my wallet, removed a five, and put it on the bar beside a Narragansett coaster. "The name."
He held a brief silent dialogue with himself, glanced at the tip jar beside the one holding pickled eggs, saw nothing inside but one lonely dime, and made the five disappear. "That was Bill Turcotte."
The name meant nothing to me. The empty table might mean nothing, either, but on the other hand . . .
I put Honest Abe"s twin brother on the bar. "Did he come in here to watch me?" If the answer to that was yes, it meant he had been following me. Maybe not just today, either. But why?
The bartender pushed the five back. "All I know is what he usually comes in for is beer and a lot of it."
"Then why did he leave without having one?"
"Maybe he looked in his wallet and didn"t see nothing but his liberry card. Do I look like f.u.c.kin Bridey Murphy? Now that you"ve stunk up my bathroom, why don"t you either order something or leave?"
"It was stinking just fine before I got there, my friend."
Not much of an exit line, but the best I could do under the circ.u.mstances. I went out and stood on the sidewalk, looking for Turcotte. There was no sign of him, but Norbert Keene was standing in the window of his drugstore, hands clasped behind his back, watching me. His smile was gone.
8.
At five-twenty that afternoon, I parked my Sunliner in the lot adjacent to the Witcham Street Baptist Church. It had plenty of company; according to the signboard, there was a 5:00 P.M. AA meeting at this particular church. In the Ford"s trunk were all the possessions I"d collected during my seven weeks as a resident of what I had come to think of as the Peculiar Little City. The only indispensable items were in the Lord Buxton briefcase Al had given me: his notes, my notes, and the remaining cash. Thank G.o.d I"d kept most of it in portable form.
Beside me on the seat was a paper bag containing my bottle of Kaopectate-now three-quarters empty-and the continence pants. Thankfully, I didn"t think I was going to need those. My stomach and bowels seemed to have settled, and the shakes had left my hands. There were half a dozen Payday candybars in the glove compartment lying on top of my Police Special. I added these items to the bag. Later, when I was in position between the garage and the hedge at 202 Wyemore Lane, I"d load the gun and stuff it into my belt. Like a cheap gunsel in the kind of B pictures that played The Strand.
There was one other item in the glove compartment: an issue of TV Guide with Fred Astaire and Barrie Chase on the cover. For probably the dozenth time since I"d bought the magazine at the newsstand on upper Main Street, I turned to the Friday listings.
8 PM, Channel 2: The New Adventures of Ellery Queen, George Nader, Les Tremayne. "So Rich, So Lovely, So Dead." A conniving stockbroker (Whit Bissell) stalks a wealthy heiress (Eva Gabor) as Ellery and his father investigate.
I put it into the bag with the other stuff-mostly for good luck-then got out, locked my car, and set out for Wyemore Lane. I pa.s.sed a few mommies and daddies trick-or-treating with children too young to be out on their own. Carved pumpkins grinned cheerfully from many stoops, and a couple of stuffed straw-hat-wearing dummies stared at me blankly.
I walked down Wyemore Lane in the middle of the sidewalk as if I had every right to be there. When a father approached, holding the hand of a little girl wearing dangly gypsy earrings, mom"s bright red lipstick, and big black plastic ears clapped over a curly-haired wig, I tipped my hat to Dad and bent down to the child, who was carrying a paper bag of her own.
"Who are you, honey?"
"Annette Foonijello," she said. "She"s the prettiest Mouseketeer."
"And you"re just as pretty," I told her. "Now what do you say?"