I ran through the arch and stopped there with my mouth open. Based on Harry"s theme, I had always a.s.sumed that I"d have to stop a man swinging the sort of hammer guys kept in their toolboxes. That wasn"t what he had. What he had was a sledgehammer with a twenty-pound head, and he was handling it as if it were a toy. His sleeves were rolled up, and I could see the bulge of muscles that had been built up by twenty years of cutting meat and toting carca.s.ses. Doris was on the living room rug. He had already broken her arm-the bone was sticking out through a rip in the sleeve of her dress-and dislocated her shoulder as well, from the look. Her face was pale and dazed. She was crawling across the rug in front of the TV with her hair hanging in her face. Dunning was slinging back the hammer. This time he"d connect with her head, crushing her skull and sending her brains flying onto the couch cushions.
Ellen was a little dervish, trying to push him back out the door. "Stop, Daddy, stop!"
He grabbed her by her hair and heaved her. She went reeling, feathers flying out of her headdress. She struck the rocking chair and knocked it over.
"Dunning!" I shouted. "Stop it!"
He looked at me with red, streaming eyes. He was drunk. He was crying. Snot hung from his nostrils and spit slicked his chin. His face was a cramp of rage, woe, and bewilderment.
"Who the f.u.c.k"re you?" he asked, then charged at me without waiting for an answer.
I pulled the trigger of the revolver, thinking, This time it won"t fire, it"s a Derry gun and it won"t fire.
But it did. The bullet took him in the shoulder. A red rose bloomed on his white shirt. He twisted sideways with the impact, then came on again. He raised the sledge. The bloom on his shirt spread, but he didn"t seem to feel it.
I pulled the trigger again, but someone jostled me just as I did, and the bullet went high and wild. It was Harry. "Stop it, Daddy!" His voice was shrill. "Stop or I"ll shoot you!"
Arthur "Tugga" Dunning was crawling toward me, toward the kitchen. Just as Harry fired his air rifle-ka-chow!-Dunning brought the sledge down on Tugga"s head. The boy"s face was obliterated in a sheet of blood. Bone fragments and clumps of hair leaped high in the air; droplets of blood spattered the overhead light fixture. Ellen and Mrs. Dunning were shrieking, shrieking.
I caught my balance and fired a third time. This one tore off Dunning"s right cheek all the way up to the ear, but it still didn"t stop him. He"s not human is what I thought then, and what I still think now. All I saw in his gushing eyes and gnashing mouth-he seemed to be chewing the air rather than breathing it-was a kind of blabbering emptiness.
"Who the f.u.c.k"re you?" he repeated, then: "You"re trespa.s.sing."
He slung the sledge back and brought it around in a whistling horizontal arc. I bent at the knees, ducking as I did it, and although the twenty-pound head seemed to miss me entirely-I felt no pain, not then-a wave of heat flashed across the top of my head. The gun flew out of my hand, struck the wall, and bounced into the corner. Something warm was running down the side of my face. Did I understand he"d clipped me just enough to tear a six-inch-long gash in my scalp? That he"d missed either knocking me unconscious or outright killing me by maybe as little as an eighth of an inch? I can"t say. All of this happened in less than a minute; maybe it was only thirty seconds. Life turns on a dime, and when it does, it turns fast.
"Get out!" I shouted at Troy. "Take your sister and get out! Yell for help! Yell your head o-"
Dunning swung the sledge. I jumped back, and the head buried itself in the wall, smashing laths and sending a puff of plaster into the air to join the gunsmoke. The TV was still playing. Still violins, still murder music.
As Dunning struggled to pull his sledge out of the wall, something flew past me. It was the Daisy air rifle. Harry had thrown it. The barrel struck Frank Dunning in his torn-open cheek and he screamed with pain.
"You little b.a.s.t.a.r.d! I"ll kill you for that!"
Troy was carrying Ellen to the door. So that"s all right, I thought, I changed things at least that much- But before he could get her out, someone first filled the door and then came stumbling in, knocking Troy Dunning and the little girl to the floor. I barely had time to see this, because Frank had pulled the sledge free and was coming for me. I backed up, shoving Harry into the kitchen with one hand.
"Out the back door, son. Fast. I"ll hold him off until you-"
Frank Dunning shrieked and stiffened. All at once something was poking out through his chest. It was like a magic trick. The thing was so coated with blood it took a second for me to realize what it was: the point of a bayonet.
"That"s for my sister, you f.u.c.k," Bill Turcotte rasped. "That"s for Clara."
13.
Dunning went down, feet in the living room, head in the archway between the living room and the kitchen. But not all the way down. The tip of the blade dug into the floor and held him up. One of his feet kicked a single time, then he was still. He looked like he"d died trying to do a push-up.
Everyone was screaming. The air stank of gunsmoke, plaster, and blood. Doris was lurching crookedly toward her dead son with her hair hanging in her face. I didn"t want her to see that-Tugga"s head had been split open all the way down to the jaw-but there was no way I could stop her.
"I"ll do better next time, Mrs. Dunning," I croaked. "That"s a promise."
There was blood all over my face; I had to wipe it out of my left eye in order to see on that side. Since I was still conscious, I thought I wasn"t hurt too badly, and I knew that scalp wounds bleed like a b.i.t.c.h. But I was a mess, and if there was ever going to be a next time, I had to get out of here this time, unseen and in a hurry.
But I had to talk to Turcotte before I left. Or at least try. He had collapsed against the wall by Dunning"s splayed feet. He was holding his chest and gasping. His face was corpse-white except for his lips, now as purple as those of a kid who has been gobbling huckleberries. I reached for his hand. He grasped it with panicky tightness, but there was a tiny glint of humor in his eyes.
"Who"s the chickens.h.i.t now, Amberson?"
"Not you," I said. "You"re a hero."
"Yeah," he wheezed. "Just toss the f.u.c.kin medal in my coffin."
Doris was cradling her dead son. Behind her, Troy was walking in circles with Ellen"s head pressed tight against his chest. He didn"t look toward us, didn"t seem to realize we were there. The little girl was wailing.
"You"ll be okay," I said. As if I knew. "Now listen, because this is important: forget my name."
"What name? You never gave it."
"Right. And . . . you know my car?"
"Ford." He was losing his voice, but his eyes were still fixed on mine. "Nice one. Convert. Y-block engine. Fifty-four or-five."
"You never saw it. That"s the most important thing of all, Turcotte. I need it to get downstate tonight and I"ll have to take the turnpike most of the way because I don"t know any of the other roads. If I can get down to central Maine, I"ll be free and clear. Do you understand what I"m telling you?"
"Never saw your car," he said, then winced. "Ah, f.u.c.k, don"t that hurt."
I put my fingers on his stubble-p.r.i.c.kly throat and felt his pulse. It was rapid and wildly uneven. In the distance I could hear wailing sirens. "You did the right thing."
His eyes rolled. "Almost didn"t. I don"t know what I was thinkin of. I must have been crazy. Listen, buddy. If they do run you down, don"t tell em what I . . . you know, what I-"
"I never would. You took care of him, Turcotte. He was a mad dog and you put him down. Your sister would be proud."
He smiled and closed his eyes.
14.
I went into the bathroom, grabbed a towel, soaked it in the basin, and scrubbed my b.l.o.o.d.y face. I tossed the towel in the tub, grabbed two more, and stepped out into the kitchen.
The boy who had brought me here was standing on the faded linoleum by the stove and watching me. Although it had probably been six years since he"d sucked his thumb, he was sucking it now. His eyes were wide and solemn, swimming with tears. Freckles of blood spattered his cheeks and brow. Here was a boy who had just experienced something that would no doubt traumatize him, but he was also a boy who would never grow up to become Hoptoad Harry. Or to write a theme that would make me cry.
"Who are you, mister?" he asked.
"n.o.body." I walked past him to the door. He deserved more than that, though. The sirens were closer now, but I turned back. "Your good angel," I said. Then I slipped out the back door and into Halloween night of 1958.
15.
I walked up Wyemore to Witcham, saw flashing blue lights heading for Kossuth Street, and kept on walking. Two blocks further into the residential district, I turned right on Gerard Avenue. People were standing out on the sidewalks, turned toward the sound of the sirens.
"Mister, do you know what happened?" a man asked me. He was holding the hand of a sneaker-wearing Snow White.
"I heard kids setting off cherry bombs," I said. "Maybe they started a fire." I kept walking and made sure to keep the left side of my face away from him, because there was a streetlight nearby and my scalp was still oozing blood.
Four blocks down, I turned back toward Witcham. This far south of Kossuth, Witcham Street was dark and quiet. All the available police cars were probably now at the scene. Good. I had almost reached the corner of Grove and Witcham when my knees turned to rubber. I looked around, saw no trick-or-treaters, and sat down on the curb. I couldn"t afford to stop, but I had to. I"d thrown up everything in my stomach, I hadn"t had anything to eat all day except for one lousy candybar (and couldn"t remember if I"d even managed to get all of that down before Turcotte jumped me), and I"d just been through a violent interlude in which I had been wounded-how badly I still didn"t know. It was either stop now and let my body regroup or pa.s.s out on the sidewalk.
I put my head between my knees and drew a series of deep slow breaths, as I"d learned in the Red Cross course I"d taken to get a lifeguard certification back in college. At first I kept seeing Tugga Dunning"s head as it exploded under the smashing downward force of the hammer, and that made the faintness worse. Then I thought of Harry, who had been splashed with his brother"s blood but was otherwise unhurt. And Ellen, who wasn"t deep in a coma from which she would never emerge. And Troy. And Doris. Her badly broken arm might hurt her for the rest of her life, but at least she was going to have a life.
"I did it, Al," I whispered.
But what had I done in 2011? What had I done to 2011? Those were questions that still had to be answered. If something terrible had happened because of the b.u.t.terfly effect, I could always go back and erase it . . . unless, in changing the course of the Dunning family"s lives, I had somehow changed the course of Al Templeton"s as well. Suppose the diner was no longer where I"d left it? Suppose it turned out he"d never moved it from Auburn? Or never opened a diner at all? It didn"t seem likely . . . but here I was, sitting on a 1958 curb with blood oozing out of my 1958 haircut, and how likely was that?
I rose to my feet, staggered, then got moving. To my right, down Witcham Street, I could see the flash and strobe of blue lights. A crowd had gathered on the corner of Kossuth, but their backs were to me. The church where I"d left my car was just across the street. The Sunliner was alone in the parking lot now, but it looked okay; no Halloween pranksters had let the air out of my tires. Then I saw a yellow square under one of the windshield wipers. My thoughts flashed to the Yellow Card Man, and my gut tightened. I s.n.a.t.c.hed it, then exhaled a sigh of relief when I read what was written there: JOIN YOUR FRIENDS AND NEIGHBORS FOR WORSHIP THIS SUNDAY AT 9 AM NEWCOMERS ALWAYS WELCOME! REMEMBER, "LIFE IS THE QUESTION, JESUS IS THE ANSWER."
"I thought hard drugs were the answer, and I could sure use some right now," I muttered, and unlocked the driver"s door. I thought of the paper bag I"d left behind the garage of the house on Wyemore Lane. The cops investigating the area were apt to discover it. Inside they"d find a few candybars, a mostly empty bottle of Kaopectate . . . and a stack of what amounted to adult diapers.
I wondered what they"d make of that.
But not too much.
16.
By the time I reached the turnpike, my head was aching fiercely, but even if this hadn"t been before the era of twenty-four-hour convenience stores, I"m not sure I would have dared to stop; my shirt was stiff with drying blood on the lefthand side. At least I"d remembered to fill the gas tank.
Once I tried exploring the gash on my head with the tips of my fingers and was rewarded with a blaze of pain that persuaded me not to make a second attempt.
I did stop at the rest area outside of Augusta. By then it was past ten o"clock and the place was deserted. I turned on the dome light and checked my pupils in the rearview mirror. They looked the same size, which was a relief. There was a snacks vending machine outside the men"s privy, where ten cents bought me a cream-stuffed chocolate whoopie pie. I gobbled it as I drove, and my headache abated somewhat.
It was after midnight when I got to Lisbon Falls. Main Street was dark, but both the Worumbo and U.S. Gypsum mills were running full tilt, huffing and chuffing, throwing their stinks into the air and spilling their acid wastes into the river. The cl.u.s.ters of shining lights made them look like s.p.a.ceships. I parked the Sunliner outside the Kennebec Fruit, where it would stay until someone peeked inside and saw the spots of blood on the seat, driver"s door, and steering wheel. Then the police would be called. I supposed they"d dust the Ford for fingerprints. It was possible they"d match prints found on a certain .38 Police Special at a murder scene in Derry. The name George Amberson might emerge in Derry and then down here in the Falls. But if the rabbit-hole was still where I"d left it, George was going to leave no trail to follow, and the fingerprints belonged to a man who wasn"t going to be born for another eighteen years.
I opened the trunk, took out the briefcase, and decided to leave everything else. For all I knew, it might end up being sold at the Jolly White Elephant, the secondhand store not far from t.i.tus Chevron. I crossed the street toward the mill"s dragon-breath, a shat-HOOSH, shat-HOOSH that would continue around the clock until Reagan-era free trade rendered pricey American textiles obsolete.
The drying shed was lit by a white fluorescent glow from the dirty dyehouse windows. I spotted the chain blocking off the drying shed from the rest of the courtyard. It was too dark to read the sign hanging from it, and it had been almost two months since I"d seen it, but I remembered what it said: NO ADMITTANCE BEYOND THIS POINT UNTIL SEWER PIPE IS REPAIRED. There was no sign of the Yellow Card Man-or the Orange Card Man, if that"s what he was now.
Headlights flooded the courtyard, illuminating me like an ant on a plate. My shadow jumped out long and scrawny in front of me. I froze as a big transport truck trundled toward me. I expected the driver to stop, lean out, and ask me what the h.e.l.l I was doing here. He slowed but didn"t stop. Raised a hand to me. I raised mine in return, and he drove on toward the loading docks with dozens of empty barrels clunking around in back. I headed for the chain, took one quick look around, and ducked under it.
I walked down the flank of the drying shed, heart beating hard in my chest. The gash on my head pounded in harmony. This time there was no chunk of concrete to mark the spot. Slow, I told myself. Slow. The step is right . . . here.
Only it wasn"t. There was nothing but the pavement under my testing, tapping shoe.
I went a little farther, and there was still nothing. It was cold enough to see a thin vapor when I exhaled, but a light, greasy sweat had broken out on my arms and neck. I went a little farther, but was now almost sure I had gone too far. Either the rabbit-hole was gone or it had never been there in the first place, which meant that my whole life as Jake Epping-everything from my prize-winning FFA garden in grammar school to my abandoned novel in college to my marriage to a basically sweet woman who"d almost drowned my love for her in alcohol-had been a crazy hallucination. I"d been George Amberson all along.
I went a little farther, then stopped, breathing hard. Somewhere-maybe in the dyehouse, maybe in one of the weaving rooms-someone shouted "f.u.c.k me sideways!" I jumped, then jumped again at the bull roar of laughter that followed the exclamation.
Not here.
Gone.
Or never was.
And did I feel disappointment? Terror? Outright panic? None of those, actually. What I felt was a sneaking sense of relief. What I thought was, I could live here. And quite easily. Happily, even.
Was that true? Yes. Yes.
It stank near the mills and on public conveyances where everybody smoked their heads off, but in most places the air smelled incredibly sweet. Incredibly new. Food tasted good; milk was delivered directly to your door. After a period of withdrawal from my computer, I"d gained enough perspective to realize just how addicted to that f.u.c.king thing I"d become, spending hours reading stupid email attachments and visiting websites for the same reason mountaineers wanted to climb Everest: because they were there. My cell phone never rang because I had no cell phone, and what a relief that had been. Outside of the big cities, most folks were still on party lines, and did the majority lock their doors at night? b.a.l.l.s they did. They worried about nuclear war, but I was safe in the knowledge that the people of 1958 would grow old and die without ever hearing of an A-bomb being exploded in anything but a test. No one worried about global warming or suicide bombers flying hijacked jets into skysc.r.a.pers.
And if my 2011 life wasn"t a hallucination (in my heart I knew this), I could still stop Oswald. I just wouldn"t know the ultimate result. I thought I could live with that.
Okay. The first thing to do was to return to the Sunliner and get out of Lisbon Falls. I"d drive to Lewiston, find the bus station, and buy a ticket to New York. I"d take a train to Dallas from there . . . or h.e.l.l, why not fly? I still had plenty of cash, and no airline clerk was going to demand a picture ID. All I had to do was fork over the price of a ticket and Trans World Airlines would welcome me aboard.
The relief of this decision was so great that my legs again went rubbery. The weakness wasn"t as bad as it had been in Derry, when I"d had to sit down, but I leaned against the drying shed for support. My elbow struck it, making a soft bong sound. And a voice spoke to me out of thin air. Hoa.r.s.e. Almost a growl. A voice from the future, as it were.
"Jake? Is that you?" This was followed by a fusillade of dry, barking coughs.
I almost kept silent. I could have kept silent. Then I thought of how much of his life Al had invested in this project, and how I was now the only thing he had left to hope for.
I turned toward the sound of those coughs and spoke in a low voice. "Al? Talk to me. Count off." I could have added, Or just keep coughing.
He began to count. I went toward the sound of the numbers, feeling with my foot. After ten steps-far beyond the place where I had given up-the toe of my shoe simultaneously took a step forward and struck something that stopped it cold. I took one more look around. Took one more breath of the chemical-stenchy air. Then I closed my eyes and started climbing steps I couldn"t see. On the fourth one, the chilly night air was replaced with stuffy warmth and the smells of coffee and spices. At least that was the case with my top half. Below the waist, I could still feel the night.
I stood there for maybe three seconds, half in the present and half in the past. Then I opened my eyes, saw Al"s haggard, anxious, too-thin face, and stepped back into 2011.