The time was promptly agreed to.
"In the meantime, I will take the MSS. and look it over, to form a general idea of the plot. Here is my card. By-the-way, you will of course arrange it so that we shall not be interrupted during our conference. It disturbs anything of that kind to have people coming in and out. We want to be entirely alone so as to give our full attention to the work in hand."
Miss Fern smilingly acquiesced, saying that it was exactly what she would wish.
"And do you think there may be hope for it yet--that poor little ma.n.u.script?" she asked, as she stood by the door ready to take her departure.
"That is a question I can hardly answer," he replied. "I shall be better able to tell you in a week or two, I trust."
She lingered, with her hand on the door k.n.o.b.
"My father is willing to take all the financial risks," she said. "That ought to make a difference, don"t you think so?"
"It would, with many houses," he admitted. "I am glad to know these things. Thursday, then, Miss--Miss Fern."
He wanted to call her "Millicent," for he had read the name on the package he still held in his hand; but on the whole he concluded that this would be a little premature.
CHAPTER III.
"HER FEET WERE PINK."
When Miss Millicent Fern entered the office of Lawrence Gouger, as detailed in the preceding chapter, it will be remembered that she found that gentleman and his friend, Archie Weil, with their hats in their hands. The fact was that Mr. Weil had but just entered the room, and that Mr. Gouger had accepted an invitation to take lunch with him, an arrangement that was by no means an infrequent one between them. The entrance of Miss Fern, and the subsequent proceedings, compelled the literary critic to go out alone, as has been seen. When he returned he found Mr. Weil still there.
"Haven"t you been to lunch yet!" exclaimed Mr. Gouger.
"I have not been out of this office," was the reply, "and all appet.i.te for anything to eat has left me. Lawrence, that is one of the most interesting girls I ever met."
Mr. Gouger pursed up his lips, and uttered an impatient, "Pah!" He then remarked that Mr. Weil had a habit of finding such a quality in the latest women of his acquaintance.
"What does she amount to?" he asked. "An overgrown schoolgirl, who did not half learn her lessons. Read that MSS. she left here, and get disillusionized in short order. Why, she doesn"t even know how to spell, and her periods and commas are in a hopeless tangle."
His companion eyed him quizzically.
"Are periods and commas, even a correct spelling of the English language, the only things you can see in a bright, handsome girl?" he demanded. "For shame, Lawrence! You are a dried-up old mummy. Your senses are numb. A lively wind will come in at the keyhole some day and blow you out of that chimney."
Mr. Gouger heaved a sigh, as if to say that discussion with such a nonsensical fellow was useless, and took his seat at his desk, where an unfinished pile of MSS. awaited his reading.
"She"s given me leave to take her story home," said Mr. Weil, with a mischievous expression.
The critic stared at his friend.
"Given it to you?" he repeated. "How did that happen?"
"I asked her for it, naturally. You were so severe on the poor child, that I couldn"t help putting in a cheering word. We talked of the whole business, and she was willing I should see if my opinion agreed with yours."
"_Your_ opinion!" echoed Gouger, testily. "What is that worth? But take the stuff, if you want it, and when you are done, send it to her; it will make less rubbish in this confounded hole. One thing I"ll tell you, though, in advance. You"ll never be able to make sense of it, unless you get some one to straighten it out."
"That"s all right," replied the other. "After I have read it through, I am going to Miss Fern"s house, where she will read it to me."
Mr. Gouger started from his chair.
"You don"t mean that!" he exclaimed.
"But I do. She asked me, and I"m going. I understand that it"s a rather bold tale, and I can conceive nothing more entertaining than to hear that kind of thing from the red lips of such a pretty piece of flesh and blood as has just left here."
There was an uneasy expression on the face of the critic as he heard these words. He liked Weil, although they were as different in their natures as two men could well be. He wanted to please him, but the aspect of this affair was not agreeable.
"Look here, Archie," he said, earnestly, "there are some things that I can"t permit, you know. My office must not be made a starting-place for one of your lawless adventures. You met Miss Fern here. Now, I protest against your going to her house, pretending that you are interested in that novel, when your real purpose is of a much more questionable kind."
Mr. Weil put on the air of one whose feelings are lacerated by an unjust suspicion.
"My dear Lawrence--" he began.
"That"s all right," growled the critic. "I may or may not be your "dear Lawrence," but I know you like--like a book," he added, hitting by accident on a very excusable simile. "You are an old dog that is not likely to learn new tricks. I shall send this MSS. back to Miss Fern, myself, enclosing a letter warning her to have nothing to do with you."
A laugh escaped the lips of Archie Weil at this proposition.
"If you knew the feminine mind half as well as you do modern literature," he answered, "you would see how little that would avail. I have met Miss Fern and made a distinctly favorable impression. Her address is in my pocket, and I have received a pressing invitation to call. If you choose to send the MSS. by another messenger you will relieve me of the task of carrying a bundle, but you will accomplish nothing more."
Mr. Gouger"s mouth opened in astonishment at the evident advantage which his friend had gained in so short a time.
"You must have convinced her that your literary opinions are of value,"
he said, presently. "If I write that you are a charletan and entirely unworthy of attention, what will happen then?"
The smiling gentleman opposite crossed his hands over his left knee, and did not delay his answer.
"I will tell you," he said. "In the same mail she will receive a letter from me, warning her that a certain party, who has given an adverse judgment on her writings, may attempt to influence her against others more likely to decide in her favor. She will be told that, having rejected a book, this certain party does not wish any one else to print it. Send the severest note you can construct, Lawrence. I have few talents, but I know how to write letters."
The critic could hardly believe that fate had thrown so many cords around his neck in the brief s.p.a.ce of one hour, but the more he thought the more he became convinced that his best course was to shut his eyes.
"Well, gang your gait," he said, after a long pause, during which the look of triumph deepened on his companion"s face. "You will have to answer for your own sins. But I"ll tell you one thing, that may save your time. Women who write racy novels are almost without exception remarkably correct in their own lives."
Mr. Weil inquired if his friend was certain of this, and there was a suspicion of disappointment in his tone.
"Absolutely," said Mr. Gouger, refreshing his memory. "I can think of a dozen instances to prove the point. There is Lelia Dante, for instance, who writes like a--like a--well, you know how she writes. She sticks to her mother"s ap.r.o.n strings like a four-year-old child. They never are seen apart, I am told. Then there is Mrs. Helen Walker Wilbur, the poetess. We have a volume of her verse that is positively combustible from its own heat. The sheets had to be run off the press soaked in water to keep them from igniting. The room was full of steam all the time the work was going on. Warm! I should say so! Now, that woman is vain, and she dresses foolishly, and she does odd things for the sake of being talked about--but n.o.body questions her loyalty to her husband. You would think by some of her poems that an East Indian regiment would not suffice for her, and yet she is the straightest wife on Manhattan Island. Oh, I know so many cases. You remember that girl who wrote, "Love"s Extremities," a work as pa.s.sionate as Sappho. She is a little Quaker-like maiden,[A] who dresses and talks like a sister of one of the Episcopal guilds. These women are on fire at the brain only. They would repel a physical advance with more indignation than those endowed with less esthetic perceptions. So, see Miss Fern as much as you like. Should you attempt anything improper you will prove the truth of my a.s.sertions."
[Footnote A: Now dead, alas!--A. R.]
Mr. Weil changed the knee he had been nursing, but the quiet smile did not leave his countenance.
"What an inconsistent fellow you are, Lawrence," he said. "I could convict you of a hundred errors of logic. Do you remember telling Mr.
Roseleaf that a man should have a pa.s.sion before he attempts to depict one."
"And I say so still," retorted Gouger. "_You_ don"t call the ravings of these poetesses and female novelists real life, do you? _You_ know the actual lover isn"t content with kissing the hair and the feet of his divinity! There is more about women"s _feet_ in these poems and novels than all the rest of their anatomy put together. And what is a woman"s foot? Did you ever see one that was pretty--that you wanted to put to your lips?"