Wanning rose and walked aimlessly down the hall and out through the dining-room.
"Any Apollinaris on ice, Sam? I"m not feeling very well tonight."
The old colored man dried his hands.
"Yessah, Mistah Wanning. Have a little rye with it, sah?"
"No, thank you, Sam. That"s one of the things I can"t do any more.
I"ve been to see a big doctor in the city, and he tells me there"s something seriously wrong with me. My kidneys have sort of gone back on me."
It was a satisfaction to Wanning to name the organ that had betrayed him, while all the rest of him was so sound.
Sam was immediately interested. He shook his grizzled head and looked full of wisdom.
"Don"t seem like a gen"leman of such a temperate life ought to have anything wrong thar, sah."
"No, it doesn"t, does it?"
Wanning leaned against the china closet and talked to Sam for nearly half an hour. The specialist who condemned him hadn"t seemed half so much interested. There was not a detail about the examination and the laboratory tests in which Sam did not show the deepest concern.
He kept asking Wanning if he could remember "straining himself" when he was a young man.
"I"ve knowed a strain like that to sleep in a man for yeahs and yeahs, and then come back on him, "deed I have," he said, mysteriously. "An" again, it might be you got a floatin" kidney, sah. Aftah dey once teah loose, dey sometimes don"t make no trouble for quite a while."
When Wanning went to his room he did not go to bed. He sat up until he heard the voices of his wife and daughters in the hall below. His own bed somehow frightened him. In all the years he had lived in this house he had never before looked about his room, at that bed, with the thought that he might one day be trapped there, and might not get out again. He had been ill, of course, but his room had seemed a particularly pleasant place for a sick man; sunlight, flowers,--agreeable, well-dressed women coming in and out.
Now there was something sinister about the bed itself, about its position, and its relation to the rest of the furniture.
II
The next morning, on his way downtown, Wanning got off the subway train at Astor Place and walked over to Washington Square. He climbed three flights of stairs and knocked at his son"s studio.
Harold, dressed, with his stick and gloves in his hand, opened the door. He was just going over to the Brevoort for breakfast. He greeted his father with the cordial familiarity practised by all the "boys" of his set, clapped him on the shoulder and said in his light, tonsilitis voice:
"Come in, Governor, how delightful! I haven"t had a call from you in a long time."
He threw his hat and gloves on the writing table. He was a perfect gentleman, even with his father.
Florence said the matter with Harold was that he had heard people say he looked like Byron, and stood for it.
What Harold would stand for in such matters was, indeed, the best definition of him. When he read his play "The Street Walker" in drawing rooms and one lady told him it had the poetic symbolism of Tchekhov, and another said that it suggested the biting realism of Brieux, he never, in his most secret thoughts, questioned the ac.u.men of either lady. Harold"s speech, even if you heard it in the next room and could not see him, told you that he had no sense of the absurd,--a throaty staccato, with never a downward inflection, trustfully striving to please.
"Just going out?" his father asked. "I won"t keep you. Your mother told you I had a discouraging session with Seares?"
"So awfully sorry you"ve had this bother, Governor; just as sorry as I can be. No question about it"s coming out all right, but it"s a downright nuisance, your having to diet and that sort of thing. And I suppose you ought to follow directions, just to make us all feel comfortable, oughtn"t you?" Harold spoke with fluent sympathy.
Wanning sat down on the arm of a chair and shook his head. "Yes, they do recommend a diet, but they don"t promise much from it."
Harold laughed precipitately. "Delicious! All doctors are, aren"t they? So profound and oracular! The medicine-man; it"s quite the same idea, you see; with tom-toms."
Wanning knew that Harold meant something subtle,--one of the subtleties which he said were only spoiled by being explained--so he came bluntly to one of the issues he had in mind.
"I would like to see you settled before I quit the harness, Harold."
Harold was absolutely tolerant.
He took out his cigarette case and burnished it with his handkerchief.
"I perfectly understand your point of view, dear Governor, but perhaps you don"t altogether get mine. Isn"t it so? I am settled.
What you mean by being settled, would unsettle me, completely. I"m cut out for just such an existence as this; to live four floors up in an attic, get my own breakfast, and have a charwoman to do for me. I should be awfully bored with an establishment. I"m quite content with a little diggings like this."
Wanning"s eyes fell. Somebody had to pay the rent of even such modest quarters as contented Harold, but to say so would be rude, and Harold himself was never rude. Wanning did not, this morning, feel equal to hearing a statement of his son"s uncommercial ideals.
"I know," he said hastily. "But now we"re up against hard facts, my boy. I did not want to alarm your mother, but I"ve had a time limit put on me, and it"s not a very long one."
Harold threw away the cigarette he had just lighted in a burst of indignation.
"That"s the sort of thing I consider criminal, Father, absolutely criminal! What doctor has a right to suggest such a thing? Seares himself may be knocked out tomorrow. What have laboratory tests got to do with a man"s will to live? The force of that depends upon his entire personality, not on any organ or pair of organs."
Harold thrust his hands in his pockets and walked up and down, very much stirred. "Really, I have a very poor opinion of scientists.
They ought to be made serve an apprenticeship in art, to get some conception of the power of human motives. Such brutality!"
Harold"s plays dealt with the grimmest and most depressing matters, but he himself was always agreeable, and he insisted upon high cheerfulness as the correct tone of human intercourse.
Wanning rose and turned to go. There was, in Harold, simply no reality, to which one could break through. The young man took up his hat and gloves.
"Must you go? Let me step along with you to the sub. The walk will do me good."
Harold talked agreeably all the way to Astor Place. His father heard little of what he said, but he rather liked his company and his wish to be pleasant.
Wanning went to his club for luncheon, meaning to spend the afternoon with some of his friends who had retired from business and who read the papers there in the empty hours between two and seven.
He got no satisfaction, however. When he tried to tell these men of his present predicament, they began to describe ills of their own in which he could not feel interested. Each one of them had a treacherous organ of which he spoke with animation, almost with pride, as if it were a crafty business compet.i.tor whom he was constantly outwitting. Each had a doctor, too, for whom he was ardently soliciting business. They wanted either to telephone their doctor and make an appointment for Wanning, or to take him then and there to the consulting room. When he did not accept these invitations, they lost interest in him and remembered engagements.
He called a taxi and returned to the offices of McQuiston, Wade, and Wanning.
Settled at his desk, Wanning decided that he would not go home to dinner, but would stay at the office and dictate a long letter to an old college friend who lived in Wyoming. He could tell Douglas Brown things that he had not succeeded in getting to any one else. Brown, out in the Wind River mountains, couldn"t defend himself, couldn"t slap Wanning on the back and tell him to gather up the sunbeams.
He called up his house in Orange to say that he would not be home until late. Roma answered the telephone. He spoke mournfully, but she was not disturbed by it.
"Very well, Father. Don"t get too tired," she said in her well modulated voice.
When Wanning was ready to dictate his letter, he looked out from his private office into the reception room and saw that his stenographer in her hat and gloves, and furs of the newest cut, was just leaving.
"Goodnight, Mr. Wanning," she said, drawing down her dotted veil.
Had there been important business letters to be got off on the night mail, he would have felt that he could detain her, but not for anything personal. Miss Doane was an expert legal stenographer, and she knew her value. The slightest delay in dispatching office business annoyed her. Letters that were not signed until the next morning awoke her deepest contempt. She was scrupulous in professional etiquette, and Wanning felt that their relations, though pleasant, were scarcely cordial.
As Miss Doane"s trim figure disappeared through the outer door, little Annie Wooley, the copyist, came in from the stenographers"
room. Her hat was pinned over one ear, and she was scrambling into her coat as she came, holding her gloves in her teeth and her battered handbag in the fist that was already through a sleeve.
"Annie, I wanted to dictate a letter. You were just leaving, weren"t you?"