The older fellow flared into anger, but he seemed afraid, too. "I wanted a deFocus, not a G.o.d-d.a.m.ned mindscrub!"
The little man, Trud. . . Trud Silipan, Trud Silipan,retreated. "Don"t worry. I"m sure she"ll come around. We didn"t touch the memory structures, I swear." He shot another fearful glance her way. "Maybe. . .I don"t know, maybe the deFocus worked fine and we"re seeing some kind of autorepression." He came a little closer, still beyond her hands and teeth, and gave her a sickly smile. "Boss? You remember me, Trud Silipan? We"ve worked together for years of Watch time, and before that back on Balacrea, under Alan Nau. Don"t you remember?"
Anne stared at the round face, the weak smile. Alan Nau. Tomas Nau. Oh. . .dear. . . G.o.d. G.o.d.She had wakened to a nightmare that had never ended. The torture pits, and then the Focus, and then a lifetime of being being the enemy. the enemy.
Silipan"s face had blurred, but his voice was suddenly cheerful. "See, Pham! She"s crying. She does remember!"
Yes. Everything.
But now Pham Nuwen"s voice sounded even angrier. "Get out, Trud. Just get out."
"It"s easy to verify. We can-"
"Get out!"
She didn"t hear Silipan after that. The world had collapsed into pain, sobbing grief that took away her breath and senses.
She felt an arm across her shoulders, and this time she knew it wasn"t the touch of a torturer. Who am I? Who am I? That had been the easy question. The real question, That had been the easy question. The real question, What am I?, What am I?, had eluded her a few seconds more, but now the memories were flooding in, the monstrous evil she had been since that day in the mountains above Arnham. had eluded her a few seconds more, but now the memories were flooding in, the monstrous evil she had been since that day in the mountains above Arnham.
She shuddered from Pham"s arm, only to encounter the straps that held her down.
"Sorry," he muttered, and she heard the shackles fall away. And now it didn"t matter. She curled up into a ball, barely aware of his comfort. He was talking to her, simple things, repeated over and over in different ways. "It"s all right now, Anne. Tomas Nau is dead. He"s been dead for four days. You"re free. We"re all free. . . ."
After a while, he was quiet, only the touch of his arm on her shoulders announcing his presence. Her tearing sobs wound down. There was no terror now. The worst had happened, over and over, and what was left was dead and empty.
Time pa.s.sed.
She felt her body slowly relax, unbend. She forced open her tight-shut eyes, forced herself to turn and face Pham. Her face hurt hurt with the crying, and how she wished she could be hurt a million times more. "You. . .d.a.m.n you for bringing me back. Let me die now." with the crying, and how she wished she could be hurt a million times more. "You. . .d.a.m.n you for bringing me back. Let me die now."
Pham looked back at her quietly, his eyes wide and attentive. Gone was the bl.u.s.ter she had always guessed was a fake. In its place, intelligence. . .awe? No, that couldn"t be. He reached down beside her and laid the white andelirs back in her lap. The d.a.m.n things were warm, furry. Beautiful. He seemed to consider her demand, but then he shook his head. "You can"t go yet, Anne. There are more than two thousand Focused persons left here. You can free them, Anne." He gestured to the Focusing gear behind her head. "I got the feeling that Al Hom was playing roulette when he worked on you."
I can free them.The thought was the first lightness in all the years since that morning in the mountains. It must have leaked out into her expression, because a hopeful smile appeared on Pham"s lips. Anne felt her eyes narrow down. She knew as much about Focus as any Balacrean. She knew all the tricks of reFocusing, of redirecting loyalty. "Pham Trinli-Pham Whoever-You-Really-Are-I"ve watched you for many years. Almost from the beginning, I thought you were working against Tomas. But I could also see how much you loved the idea of Focus. You l.u.s.ted after that power, didn"t you?"
The smile left his face. He nodded slowly. "I saw. . .I saw it could give me what I had spent a lifetime fighting for. And in the end, I saw the price was too high." He shrugged, and looked down, as if ashamed.
Anne stared into that face, thinking. Once upon a time, not even Tomas Nau could deceive her. When Anne was Focused, the edges of her mind had been sharp as razors, unenc.u.mbered by distraction and wishful thinking-and knowing Tomas"s true intent was no more use to her than a hatchet knowing it is for murdering. Now, she wasn"t sure. This man could be lying, but what he asked of her was what she yearned to do more than anything else in the world. And then, having paid back as best she could, then she could die. She returned his shrug with one of her own. "Tomas Nau lied to you about deFocus."
"He lied about many things."
"I can do better than Trud Silipan and Bil Phuong, but still there will be failures." The greatest horror of all: There would be some who would d.a.m.n her for bringing them back.
Pham reached across the flowers and took her hand. "Okay. But you will do your best."
She looked down at his hand. Blood still oozed from the gash she had opened on the side of his palm. Somehow the man was lying, but if he let her deFocus the others. . . Play along. Play along."You"re running things now?"
Pham chuckled. "I have some say. Certain Spiders have a bigger say. It"s complicated, and it"s still in chaos. Four hundred Ksec ago, Tomas Nau was still running things." His smile widened with enthusiasm. "But a hundred Msec from now, two hundred Msec, I think you are going to see a renaissance. We"ll have our ships repaired. h.e.l.l, we may have new ones. I"ve never seen an opportunity like this."
Just play along."And what do you want of me?" How long till I amreFocused as your tool? How long till I amreFocused as your tool?
"I-I just want you to be free, Anne." He looked away. "I know what you were before, Anne. I"ve seen the story of what you did on Frenk, your final capture. You remind me of someone I knew when I was a child. She also stood up against impossible odds, and she also was crushed." His face half-turned back to her. "There were times I"ve feared you more than Tomas Nau. But ever since I"ve known you were the Frenkisch Orc, I"ve prayed you could have another day."
He was such a very good liar. Too bad for him that his lie was so bald-faced, so pandering. She felt an overwhelming urge to push it over the edge: "So in a few years we"ll have functioning starships again?"
"Yes, and probably better-equipped than we came with. You know the physics we"ve discovered here. And it looks like there are other things-"
"And you will control those ships?"
"Several of them." He was still nodding, blundering his deception forward.
"And you just want to help. Me, the Frenkisch Orc. Well, sir, you are uniquely qualified. Lend me those ships. Come with me to Balacrea and Frenk and Gaspr. Help me free all all the Focused." the Focused."
It was amusing to see Pham"s smile freeze as he boggled on her words. "You want to take down a starfaring empire, an empire with Focus, with just a handful of ships? That"s . . ." Words for such insanity failed to come, and he just stared at her for a moment. Then, amazingly, his smile was back. "That"s marvelous! Anne, give me time to prepare, time to make alliances here. Give me a dozen of your years. We may not win. But I swear, we"ll make the attempt."
Whatever she asked he simply agreed to. It had to be a lie. Yet if true, it was the only promise that could make her want to live. She stared into Pham"s eyes, trying to see behind the lie. Maybe the inevitable destruction of deFocus had taken her sharpness, for however deeply she looked, she only saw awed enthusiasm. He"s a genius. And lie or truth, now he has mefor twelve years. He"s a genius. And lie or truth, now he has mefor twelve years. For just a moment she relaxed into belief. For just a moment she fantasized that this man was not a liar. For just a moment she relaxed into belief. For just a moment she fantasized that this man was not a liar. The Frenkisch Orc might yetfree them all. The Frenkisch Orc might yetfree them all. The strangest thrill flowed out from her heart, tingling through her body. It took her a moment to recognize something that had been lost to her for so very long: joy. The strangest thrill flowed out from her heart, tingling through her body. It took her a moment to recognize something that had been lost to her for so very long: joy.
SIXTY-THREE.
Pham sent Ezr Vinh groundside to negotiate.
"Why me, Pham?" This was the most extraordinary trade situation in the history of Humankind. It was also a war waiting to happen. "You should-"
Nuwen held up his hand, interrupting. "There are reasons for sending you. You know the Spiders better than any of our other unFocused people, certainly better than me."
"I could be staff. I could help you."
"No, I"ll be on your your staff." He paused, and Ezr saw a glint of worry. "You"re right, son, this is tricky. In the short run they hold the whip hand, and they have plenty of reason to hate us. We think the Lighthill faction still has the ear of the King, but-" staff." He paused, and Ezr saw a glint of worry. "You"re right, son, this is tricky. In the short run they hold the whip hand, and they have plenty of reason to hate us. We think the Lighthill faction still has the ear of the King, but-"
There were other factions in the Accord regime. Some of them thought Focused translators were a negotiable commodity.
"That"s why it"s even more important you go, Pham."
"It"s not our choice. You see, they"ve asked for you specifically."
"What?"
"Yeah. I guess over the years, working with Trixia, they think they"ve got you figured out." He grinned. "They want to see you close up."
That almost made sense. "Okay." He thought a moment. "But they"re not getting Trixia. I go down with some other translator." He glared at Pham. "She"s the star; Underville"s crew would love to get their hands on her."
"Hm. Maybe someone down there is thinking the same way. The King asked for Zinmin to accompany you." He noticed the expression on Ezr"s face. "There"s more?"
"I-yes. I want Trixia deFocused. Soon."
"Of course. I"ve given you my word. I"ve given Anne the same promise."
Ezr stared at him for a moment. And you"ve changed inside; given upthat dream. And you"ve changed inside; given upthat dream. After all that had happened, Ezr didn"t doubt. But suddenly he couldn"t wait anymore. "Move her to the front of the queue, Pham. I don"t care that you need her translations. Move her up. I want her deFocused by the time I get back." After all that had happened, Ezr didn"t doubt. But suddenly he couldn"t wait anymore. "Move her to the front of the queue, Pham. I don"t care that you need her translations. Move her up. I want her deFocused by the time I get back."
Pham raised an eyebrow. "An ultimatum?"
"No. Yes!"
The older man sighed. "You got it. We"ll start on Trixia immediately. I-I confess. We"ve been holding back on the translators. We need them so much." He pursed his lips. "Don"t expect perfection, Ezr. This is just another place where Nau lied to us. Some of the deFocused are almost as sharp as Anne. Some-"
"I know. know. " Some came back vegetables, the mindrot in an explosive runaway, triggered by the deFocus process. "But sooner or later we have to try. Sooner or later you have to give up using them." He bounced up and left Pham"s office. More talk would have just torn them both. " Some came back vegetables, the mindrot in an explosive runaway, triggered by the deFocus process. "But sooner or later we have to try. Sooner or later you have to give up using them." He bounced up and left Pham"s office. More talk would have just torn them both.
The transport to Arachna was a humble thing, Jau Xin"s pinnace with ad hoc software revised specially by Qiwi. Humankind had the high ground and the remnants of high technology-and precious little in the way of physical resources or automation. As their zipheads were deFocused, the Emergent software became useless junk-and it would be some time before the Qeng Ho automation could be adapted to the hybrid jumble that remained at L1. They were trapped in a nearly empty solar system, with the only industrial ecology down on Arachna. They might drop a few rocks on the planet, or even a few nukes, but Humankind was nearly toothless. The Spiders were powerless, too, but that would change. They knew about the invaders now, and they knew what could be done with technology. They had large parts of the Invisible Hand Invisible Hand intact. Sometime soon, the Spiders would be out here in force. Pham thought they had maybe a year to turn things around, to establish some basis of trust. Qiwi said that if intact. Sometime soon, the Spiders would be out here in force. Pham thought they had maybe a year to turn things around, to establish some basis of trust. Qiwi said that if she she were a Spider, she could do it in far less than a year. were a Spider, she could do it in far less than a year.
The temp"s axial corridor was filled from end to end when Ezr and Zinmin entered the taxi lock. Almost every unFocused human at L1 was here.
Pham and Anne were there. They floated close, a pair that Ezr Vinh would never have guessed in years past. "We"ve started the deFocus prep," Anne said. She didn"t have to say who she was talking about. "We"ll do our best, Ezr."
Qiwi wished him luck, as solemn as he had ever seen her. She seemed uncertain for a moment, then abruptly shook his hand, another thing she had never done before. "Come back safe, Ezr."
Somehow Rita Liao had put herself right before the hatch, blocking his way. Ezr reached out to comfort her. "I"ll bring Jau back, Rita." I"ll do mybest I"ll do mybest was what he thought, not having the courage to show his doubts. was what he thought, not having the courage to show his doubts.
Rita"s eyes were bloodshot. She looked even more distracted than when they had talked a few Ksecs before. "I know, Ezr. I know. The Spiders are good people. They"ll know Jau didn"t want to harm them." She had spent much of her lifetime enamored with the life on Arachna, but her faith in the translations seemed to be slipping away. "But, but if they won"t let you have him. . .Please. Give him . . ." She pushed a clear little box into his hand. It had a thumb lock, presumably keyed to Jau Xin. He saw a "membrance gem inside. She broke off and melted back into the crowd.
SIXTY-FOUR.
It was 200Ksec to Lands Command. On the ground, the Spiders drove them up that long valley road. Eerie memories floated through Ezr"s mind. Many of the buildings here were new, but I was here before it all began. I was here before it all began. It had been so unknowable then. Now there was the superficial gloss of information on everything. Zinmin Broute bounced from window to window and boggled with enthusiasm, naming everything he saw. They pa.s.sed the library he had raided with Benny Wen. The Museum of the Dark Time. And the statues at the head of King"s Way, that was Gokna"s Reaching for Accord. Zinmin could tell you about every one of the twisted figures. It had been so unknowable then. Now there was the superficial gloss of information on everything. Zinmin Broute bounced from window to window and boggled with enthusiasm, naming everything he saw. They pa.s.sed the library he had raided with Benny Wen. The Museum of the Dark Time. And the statues at the head of King"s Way, that was Gokna"s Reaching for Accord. Zinmin could tell you about every one of the twisted figures.
But today they were not lurkers stealing through someone else"s sleep. Today the lights were very bright, and when they finally moved underground, it was as stark and alien as Ritser Brughel"s Spiderish nightmares. The stairs were steep as ladders, and ordinary rooms were so low-ceilinged that Ezr and Zinmin had to crouch to move from place to place. Despite ancient drugs and millennia of gengineering, the full pull of planetary gravity was a constant, debilitating distraction. They were housed in what Zinmin claimed were royalty-cla.s.s apartments, rooms with hairy floors and ceilings high enough to stand in. The negotiations began the next day.
The Spiders they had known in the translations were mostly absent. Belga Underville, Elno Coldhaven-those were names that Ezr recognized, but they had always been at a distance. They had not been part of Sherkaner Underhill"s counterlurk. They must be consulting Victory Lighthill, though. As often as not during the negotiations, Underville would withdraw and there would be hissing conversations with persons unseen.
After the first couple of days, Ezr realized that some of those persons were very very far away: Trixia. Back in their rooms, Ezr called L1. Of course, the link went through Spider control. Ezr didn"t care. "You told me that Trixia was in deFocus." far away: Trixia. Back in their rooms, Ezr called L1. Of course, the link went through Spider control. Ezr didn"t care. "You told me that Trixia was in deFocus."
The pause seemed much longer than ten seconds. Suddenly Ezr couldn"t wait for the excuses and the evasions. "Listen, d.a.m.n you! The promise was that she would be in deFocus. Sooner or later you have to stop using her!"
Then Pham"s voice came back. "I know, Ezr. The problem is, the Spiders have insisted that she be available, still Focused. It"s a dealbreaker if we refuse. . .and Trixia refuses to cooperate with us in deFocus. We"d have to force it on her."
"I don"t care. I don"t care! They don"t own her any more than Tomas Nau." He choked on the fear, and almost started bawling. Across the room, Zinmin Broute looked as happy as any ziphead Ezr had ever seen. He was sitting cross-legged on the hairy carpet, paging through some kind of Spider picture book. We"re using him, too. We have to, just for a short while more. We"re using him, too. We have to, just for a short while more.
"Ezr, it"s only for a short time. This is breaking Anne up, too, but it"s the only sure insight the Spiders have on us. They almost trust the Focused. Everything we say, every a.s.sertion, they are talking over with the zips. We don"t have a chance of getting the Hand Hand people back without that trust. We don"t have a chance of undoing Nau"s work without that." people back without that trust. We don"t have a chance of undoing Nau"s work without that."
Rita and Jau. The thumb-locked box sat at the top of Ezr"s kit. Strange. The Spiders had not insisted on getting into it or his other things. Ezr crumpled. "Okay. But, after this meeting, no one owns owns anyone. The deal dies-I kill the deal-otherwise." He cut the connection before any answer could come back. After all, it didn"t matter what the other replied. anyone. The deal dies-I kill the deal-otherwise." He cut the connection before any answer could come back. After all, it didn"t matter what the other replied.
Almost every day, they took the tortuous climb down to the same ghastly conference room. Zinmin claimed that this was the chief of Intelligence"s private office, a "bright and open-storied room, with nooks and isolated perches." Well, there were nooks, dark fluting chimneys with hidden lairs at the top. And the video along the walls was a constant nonsense. He and Zinmin had to cross cold stone to sit on piled furs. Four or five Spiders were usually present, and almost always Underville or Coldhaven.
But the negotiations were actually going well. With the Focused to back up his story, the Spiders seemed to believe what Ezr had to say. They seemed to understand how good things could become with only a little cooperation. Certainly, the Spiders could have a presence at the rockpile. Technology would be transferred downward without restriction, in return for human access to the ground. In time, the rockpile and the temps would be moved into high Arachna orbit and there would be joint construction of a shipyard.
Sitting with the Spiders for Ksecs each day was a wearing experience. The human mind was not designed to warm to such creatures. They seemed not to have eyes, just the crystal carapaces that saw better than any human vision. You could never tell what they were looking at. Their eating hands were in constant motion, with meanings that Ezr was only beginning to understand. And when they gestured with their princ.i.p.al arms, the movement was abrupt and aggressive, like a creature on the attack. The air had a bitter, stale smell, which was strongest when extra spiders crowded around. And next time, we bring our own toilets. And next time, we bring our own toilets. Ezr was getting bowlegged trying to accommodate himself to the local facilities. Ezr was getting bowlegged trying to accommodate himself to the local facilities.
Zinmin did most of the interactive translations. But Trixia and the others were there, and sometimes when the greatest precision was desired, it was her voice that would speak Underville"s or Coldhaven"s words: Underville the implacable cop, Coldhaven the sleek young general officer. Trixia"s voice, others" souls.
At night, there were dreams, often more unpleasant than the reality he faced in the day. The worst were the ones he could understand. Trixia appeared to him, her voice and thoughts slipping back and forth between the young woman he once knew and the alien minds that owned her now. Sometimes her face would morph into a gla.s.sy carapace as she spoke, and when he asked about the change she would say he was imagining things. It was a Trixia who would remain forever Focused, ensorcelled, lost. Qiwi was in many of the dreams, sometimes the bratling, sometimes as she had been when she killed Tomas Nau. They would talk, and often she would give him advice. In the dreams it always made sense-and when he woke he could never remember the details.
One by one, the issues were resolved. They had gone from genocide to commerce in less than one million seconds. From L1, Pham Nuwen"s voice was filled with pleasure at the progress. "These guys negotiate like Traders, not governments."
"We"re giving up plenty, Pham. Since when have Customers had a site presence like we"ll be giving the Spiders?"
The usual long pause. But Pham"s tone was still bright: "Even that may work out, son. I"ll wager some of these Spiders may eventually want to be partners." Qeng Ho.
". . .One other thing," Pham continued. "Get through the POW negotiations"-the single remaining agenda item-"and we"ll be able to take Trixia off the case. Lighthill got that as a promise from the Underville faction."
The last day of negotiation started like the others. Zinmin and Ezr were guided down a-"spiral staircase" was what Zinmin called it. In human terms, it was a vertical shaft cut straight downward through the rock. An endless draft of warm air swept up past them. The shaft was almost two meters across, the walls set with five-centimeter ledges. Their guards had no trouble; they could reach from one side of the shaft to the other, supporting themselves on all sides. As they descended, the Spiders slowly turned round and round with the spiral. Every ten meters or so, there was an offset, a "landing" for them to catch their breath. Ezr was both grateful for and uneasy about the harness/leash outfit the guards insisted he wear.
"These stairs are really just to intimidate us, aren"t they, Zinmin?" He"d asked the question on earlier climbs, but Zinmin Broute had not deigned to answer.
The Focused translator was even more unsteady than Ezr on the narrow ledges, especially since he tried to imitate the splayed stance that made sense only for Spiders. Today he responded to the question. "Yes.. . .No. This is the main staircase down to the Royal Deepness. Very old. Traditional. An honor-" He slipped, swung out over the chasm, for a moment suspended by his rope and harness from the guard above them. Ezr hugged the damp wall, was almost knocked loose himself as Broute regained his footing.
They reached the final landing. The ceiling was low even by Spider standards, just over a meter high. Surrounded by their guards, they stooped and hobbled toward wide, wide doors. Beyond, the lighting was faint and blue. The Spiders could see across such a wide range. You"d think their preferred lighting would be sun-spectrum broad. But as often as not they went in for faint glimmers-or lights beyond where a human could see.
There was a familiar hiss from the dimness ahead of them.
"Come in. Sit down," Zinmin Broute said, but the thought was from the Spider within the room. Ezr and Zinmin crossed the stone flags to their "perches." He could see the other now, a large female on a slightly higher perch. Her smell was strong in the closed air. "General Underville," Ezr said politely.