"Very well, my pretty gentleman, then you may just clap your horses into your carriage, and drive back to Paris, or Italy, or Morocco if you like, for _I am_ that half-crazy uncle of yours, that rich _betyar_ of whom you speak, and I am not dead yet, as you can see for yourself."
At these words Abellino collapsed; his arms and legs grew limp and feeble, and he involuntarily stammered in his terror--
"Est-ce possible? Can it be possible?"
"Yes, sir, it can. I am that John Karpathy whom the country folks jokingly call Master Jock, and who likes to be so called."
"Ah, if only I had thought a little!" cried the young gentleman, leaping to his feet and hastening to grasp his great-uncle"s hand. "But, indeed, evil-minded persons described my only uncle to me so differently that I could not picture him to myself in the shape of such a gallant, n.o.ble gentleman. Milles tonnerres! let n.o.body in future dare to say in my presence that my dear uncle is not the finest cavalier on the continent!
I should have been inconsolable if I had not made your acquaintance.
Capital! I was looking for a dead uncle, and I have found a living one.
C"est bien charmant! The G.o.ddess of Fortune is not a woman for nothing.
I protest that she has quite befooled me!"
"Enough of this sort of flummery, my sweet nephew; I don"t like it. I am used to rough, plain speaking, even from my heydukes. I prefer to have it so. You, my good nephew, have come hither from a great distance to inherit my estate, and your creditors no doubt will be marching after you in regiments, and now you find me alive. A little aggravating I take it, eh?"
"Au contraire, as I find my dear uncle alive, it will be all the easier for him to show himself amiable towards me."
"How? Explain yourself!"
"Well, I do not ask you for a yearly allowance, ce serait bien fatigant for us both. My proposal is that you pay my debts in a lump sum, and there shall be peace between us."
"Hum! Most magnanimous! And if I do _not_ pay them, I suppose war will be declared?"
"Come, come, my dear uncle! You are pleased to be facetious! Not pay, do you say! Why, "tis only a matter of one or two hundred thousand livres or so, a mere bagatelle to you."
"Well, my dear Mr. Nephew, I much regret that you think so lightly of the estate which was won by the valour of your ancestors, but I am quite unable to help you. I also am in want of cash. I also squander it on follies, but on follies of purely home growth. I have a whole mob of comrades, heydukes and ne"er-do-weels, at my heels, and anything over and above what I spend on them, I scatter among the b.u.mpkins who till my fields, or, if a foolish whim seize me, I build me a bridge from one hill to another. But I certainly do not waste my substance on opera-dancers, nor am I given to abducting Moorish princesses, or clambering up pyramids. If you like eating and drinking, you shall always have as much as you like of both at my house, and you may also choose you there pretty girls to your heart"s content, who will look every bit as picturesque as your Morocco princesses, if only you trick them out finely enough. Moreover, if you have a mind to travel, this kingdom is quite big enough. You can ride in your carriage for eight days at a stretch without getting to the end of my property. But send money abroad I will not; we don"t carry water to the Danube."
The young gentleman began to lose patience during the course of this lecture, turning incessantly in his chair and wriggling backwards and forwards.
"I don"t ask for a gift, you know," he exclaimed at last, "but only for a payment in advance."
"What! a payment in advance! You want me to part with my very skin, I suppose?"
"Eh!" cried Abellino, impatiently, and his face began to wear an impertinent, contemptuous expression. ""Tis mine, you know, practically, or at least will be one day. I suppose you don"t want to carry it away with you in your coffin?"
"In my coffin!" shouted the old man, deeply agitated, and his face suddenly turned pale. "What! In my coffin! Do you speak of coffins to me?"
"Of course I do. Why, you"ve one leg in your coffin already, and banquets, parties, and peasant-girls are dragging the other one in too, and thus all will be mine, and I shan"t owe you a thank you, for it."
"Hie! my coachman!" thundered old Karpathy, springing from his chair, and at that moment his face wore an almost heroic expression, "get ready my conveyance. We"ll depart--depart this instant. Let n.o.body breathe the air of this room any longer."
Abellino laughed aloud at the old fellow"s impotent rage.
"Come, come, don"t be so furious," he said. "Why echauffer yourself? You only give the apoplexy a quicker chance. Come, come, my good old boy, don"t be waxy. I can wait, you know. I am quite a juvenile." And with that he stretched himself at full length across three chairs, and began to whistle a fragment of some vaudeville ditty that occurred to his mind.
The heydukes, packing up the things, would have pulled the chairs from under him, but the old man cried--
"Leave everything where it is; I"ll touch nothing that that fellow has had aught to do with. Landlord! Where is the man? Everything in this room is his!"
The last words were spoken in so hoa.r.s.e a voice as to be scarcely intelligible. The jester took his master"s hand to prevent him from falling, while the poet led the way.
"You see, it is of no use kicking up a row," said Abellino, with ironical sympathy. "Don"t go so quickly or you"ll fall, and that won"t be good for your health. Put on your fur pelisse lest you catch cold.
Where are his lordship"s leg-warmers? Hie! you fellows! Put a warm brick under my dear uncle"s feet! Watch over every hair of his head!"
All this time John Karpathy said not a word. It was the first time in his life that any one had dared to anger him. Ah, if any one else had dared to do such a thing, what a scene there would have been! The heydukes, the coachmen, stood before him trembling. Even Mr. Peter Bus himself was speechless as he looked upon that dumb listening countenance staring fixedly at him with bloodshot eyes. With great difficulty the heydukes hoisted him into his carriage. The two little girls took their places by him, one on each side. Then he beckoned the innkeeper to approach, and murmured something in his ear in a low hoa.r.s.e voice, whereupon Bus nodded with an air of approval. Mr. John then handed him his pocket-book, and signified that he was to keep its contents, and after that the carriage rumbled off with its escort of mounted torch-bearers.
The _roue_ in a mocking, strident voice, sent an irritating farewell after it with a lavish accompaniment of resounding kisses--"Adieu, cher oncle! adieu, dear Jock _bacsi_! My respects to the little girls at home, and to the little dogs also. Au revoir! To our next merry meeting!" And he kept on sending after him whole handfuls of kisses.
Meanwhile the innkeeper had begun to drag out of the room one by one all the beds and tables which Sir John had left him.
"Ah, cher ami! won"t you leave the furniture till morning? I shall want to use it."
"Impossible. The house has to be burnt down."
"Que diable! How dare you say such a thing?"
"This house belongs to the gentleman who has just gone out. What is inside it is mine, and has been paid for. He has ordered that this inn shall be burnt down, and that no other inn shall ever be built on this spot again. To every one his fancy, you know."
And thereupon, with the utmost phlegm, he neatly applied his candle to the rush-thatched eaves of the house, and with the utmost coolness watched to see how the flames would spread. By the light of the fire he could the more comfortably calculate how much money he had got for this illumination. He found he could hire three good houses for it in the neighbouring town of Szeged, and he was quite satisfied.
As for the young gentleman, if he had no wish to be burnt, he had nothing for it but to huddle himself in his mantle, whistle for his long-legged steed, mount on its back, and allow himself to be taken back to his carriage.
"You have driven me out of this inn; I"ll drive you out of the world,"
he murmured between his teeth, as his human steed with squelching boots tramped along with him through the endless mud. By the light of the fire the two men, one on the back of the other, resembled a half-submerged giant.
And thus ended the fateful encounter of the two kinsmen at the "Break-"em-tear-"em" _csarda_.
CHAPTER II.
A BARGAIN FOR THE SKIN OF A LIVING MAN.
One of the richest capitalists in Paris at this time was Monsieur Griffard. Not so very long ago, somewhere about 1780, Griffard was nothing more than a pastry-cook in one of the suburbs of the city, and his knowledge of the science of finance was limited to his dealings with the needy students who ate his wares on credit, and paid for them accordingly. The Mississippi mania whirled him along with it also. In those days every man in Paris meant to be a millionaire. In the streets, alleys, and public squares every one was either buying or selling Mississippi shares. Monsieur Griffard left his pastry-shop in the charge of his eldest a.s.sistant while he himself went in search of millions, and, what is more, found them. But one day, like a beautiful soap-bubble, the whole Mississippi joke collapsed, and Monsieur Griffard found himself out in the cold with but nine sous in his pocket.
Now, when a man who has not been a millionaire finds he has only nine sous in his purse, there"s no reason why he should be particularly angry. But when a man has stood on an eminence from whence he can survey his own coaches, horses, liveried flunkies, magnificently furnished rooms, sumptuous table, pretty mistresses, and other agreeable things of the same sort, a relapse into insignificance may be very unpleasant indeed. So poor Monsieur Griffard, frantic with rage, hastened off to a cutler"s shop, bought a large knife with seven of his sous, and had it well sharpened with the remaining two; but in the mean time up came a mob of ragged citizens with Phrygian caps on, bawling at the top of their voices, "Down with the aristocrats!" and carrying on a pole by way of a banner the last number of Marat"s newspaper, whereupon it occurred to Monsieur Griffard that he might make a better use of his well-sharpened knife than applying it to his own throat, so he mingled with the crowd, and cried, "Down with the aristocrats!" as loudly as anybody.
How or where he was pitched and tossed about during the next few years he himself probably could not have told you; but when, a few years later, we come across him again under the Directory, we find him attached as commissary of stores to the army of the Rhine, or the army of Italy, and dodging from one to the other, according as this or that general showed a disposition to shoot him. For army commissaries are of two cla.s.ses, those whose business makes them beggars and those who become millionaires; the former generally shoot themselves, while the latter are shot by others. But the last case is much the rarer.
Fortunately for himself, Monsieur Griffard belonged to the cla.s.s who are not shot, but become millionaires. He managed to acquire some of the neat little estates which the _emigre_ magnates had left to the care of the State, and when they came home again in the days of the Restoration, Monsieur Griffard was one of the lucky men who watched the gorgeous pageant of the march of the allied armies through Paris from his own balcony. Several of the _emigres_, who came in batches in the rear of the triumphant hosts, beheld with amazement the splendid five-storeyed palace in the Boulevard des Italiens, which was not there at all when they last saw Paris, and when they inquired after its owner, the name they heard was quite unfamiliar to them.
But it did not remain unfamiliar for long. The owner of millions has very little difficulty in acquiring distinctions which will admit him into the very best society. In a short time Monsieur Griffard"s name became one of the most harmonious of pa.s.swords. An elegant _soiree_, a genial _matinee_, a horse race, an orgie, an elopement, were not considered complete without him, and Monsieur Griffard never remained away, for all such occasions were so many opportunities to an able business man for learning all about the pa.s.sions, the follies, the status, the extravagance, or the necessities of other people, and building safe calculations upon what he learnt.
Monsieur Griffard was one of the boldest speculators in the world. He would lend large amounts to ruined spendthrifts whom their own servants summoned for their monthly wages, and yet, somehow or other, he always made his money by it. When I say "his money," I mean that he got back about twice as much as he expended. He did not risk his money for nothing. Amongst all the villas and pavilions on the Ile de Jerusalem, Monsieur Griffard"s pleasure-house was the most costly and the most magnificent. It was built on a little mound, which human ingenuity had exalted into a hill, and its parade looked into the waters of the Seine.
In point of style it owed something to almost every age and nation--a great point with the architects of the day, who, equally rejecting all pedantic cla.s.sicism, and all rococo prettiness, strove instead to make everything they put their hands to as complicated, bizarre, and incongruous as possible. It was not enough that the garden itself should stand on an island, but it was surrounded by an artificial stream meandering in the most masterly style in every direction, and with all sorts of bridges thrown across it, from an American suspension-bridge to a rustic Breton bridge, composed of wood and bark, and covered with ivy.
And each of these bridges had its own warden, with a halbert across his shoulder, and the wardens had little sentry-boxes to correspond with the style of the bridges, some like hermitages, others like lighthouses, and their own peculiar trumpets to proclaim loudly to approaching guests over which of the bridges they ought to go to reach the castle.