THE OLD MAN.
I called him the Old Man, but he wuzn"t an old man; he wuz a little boy--our fust one; "nd his gran"ma, who"d had a heap of experience in sich matters, allowed that he wuz for looks as likely a child as she"d ever clapped eyes on. Bein" our fust, we sot our hearts on him, and Lizzie named him Willie, for that wuz the name she liked best, havin"
had a brother w.i.l.l.yum killed in the war. But I never called him anything but the Old Man, and that name seemed to fit him, for he wuz one of your sollum babies,--alwuz thinkin" "nd thinkin" "nd thinkin", like he wuz a jedge, and when he laffed it wuzn"t like other children"s laffs, it wuz so sad-like.
Lizzie "nd I made it up between us that when the Old Man growed up we"d send him to collige "nd give him a lib"ril edication, no matter though we had to sell the farm to do it. But we never cud exactly agree as to what we was goin" to make of him; Lizzie havin" her heart sot on his bein" a preacher like his gran"pa Baker, and I wantin" him to be a lawyer "nd git rich out"n the corporations, like his uncle Wilson Barlow. So we never come to no definite conclusion as to what the Old Man wuz goin" to be bime by; but while we wuz thinkin" "nd debatin" the Old Man kep" growin" "nd growin", and all the time he wuz as serious "nd sollum as a jedge.
Lizzie got jest wrapt up in that boy; toted him round ever"where "nd never let on like it made her tired,--powerful big "nd hearty child too, but heft warn"t nothin" "longside of Lizzie"s love for the Old Man. When he caught the measles from Sairy Baxter"s baby Lizzie sot up day "nd night till he wuz well, holdin" his hands "nd singin" songs to him, "nd cryin" herse"f almost to death because she da.s.sent give him cold water to drink when he called f"r it. As for me, _my_ heart wuz wrapt up in the Old Man, _too_, but, bein" a man, it wuzn"t for me to show it like Lizzie, bein" a woman; and now that the Old Man is--wall, now that he has gone, it wouldn"t do to let on how much I sot by him, for that would make Lizzie feel all the wuss.
Sometimes, when I think of it, it makes me sorry that I didn"t show the Old Man some way how much I wuz wrapt up in him. Used to hold him in my lap "nd make faces for him "nd alder whistles "nd things; sometimes I"d kiss him on his rosy cheek, when n.o.body wuz lookin"; oncet I tried to sing him a song, but it made him cry, "nd I never tried my hand at singin" again. But, somehow, the Old Man didn"t take to me like he took to his mother: would climb down outern my lap to git where Lizzie wuz; would hang on to her gownd, no matter what she wuz doin",--whether she was makin" bread, or sewin", or puttin" up pickles, it wuz alwuz the same to the Old Man; he wuzn"t happy unless he wuz right there, clost beside his mother.
Most all boys, as I"ve heern tell, is proud to be round with their father, doin" what _he_ does "nd wearin" the kind of clothes _he_ wears.
But the Old Man wuz diff"rent; he allowed that his mother wuz his best friend, "nd the way he stuck to her--wall, it has alwuz been a great comfort to Lizzie to recollect it.
The Old Man had a kind of confidin" way with his mother. Every oncet in a while, when he"d be playin" by hisself in the front room, he"d call out, "Mudder, mudder;" and no matter where Lizzie wuz,--in the kitchen, or in the wood-shed, or in the yard, she"d answer: "What is it, darlin"?" Then the Old Man "ud say: "Tum here, mudder, I wanter tell you sumfin"." Never could find out what the Old Man wanted to tell Lizzie; like "s not he didn"t wanter tell her nothin"; may be he wuz lonesome "nd jest wanted to feel that Lizzie wuz round. But that didn"t make no diff"rence; it wuz all the same to Lizzie. No matter where she wuz or what she wuz a-doin", jest as soon as the Old Man told her he wanted to tell her somethin" she dropped ever"thing else "nd went straight to him.
Then the Old Man would laff one of his sollum, sad-like laffs, "nd put his arms round Lizzie"s neck "nd whisper--or pertend to whisper--somethin" in her ear, "nd Lizzie would laff "nd say, "Oh, what a nice secret we have atween us!" and then she would kiss the Old Man "nd go back to her work.
Time changes all things,--all things but memory, nothin" can change _that_. Seems like it wuz only yesterday or the day before that I heern the Old Man callin", "Mudder, mudder, I wanter tell you sumfin"," and that I seen him put his arms around her neck "nd whisper softly to her.
It had been an open winter, "nd there wuz fever all around us. The Baxters lost their little girl, and Homer Thompson"s children had all been taken down. Ev"ry night "nd mornin" we prayed G.o.d to save our darlin"; but one evenin" when I come up from the wood lot, the Old Man wuz restless "nd his face wuz hot "nd he talked in his sleep. May be you"ve been through it yourself,--may be you"ve tended a child that"s down with the fever; if so, may be you know what we went through, Lizzie "nd me. The doctor shook his head one night when he come to see the Old Man; we knew what that meant. I went out-doors,--I couldn"t stand it in the room there, with the Old Man seein" "nd talkin" about things that the fever made him see. I wuz too big a coward to stay "nd help his mother to bear up; so I went out-doors "nd brung in wood,--brung in wood enough to last all spring,--and then I sat down alone by the kitchen fire "nd heard the clock tick "nd watched the shadders flicker through the room.
I remember Lizzie"s comin" to me and sayin": "He"s breathin"
strange-like, "nd has little feet is cold as ice." Then I went into the front chamber where he lay. The day wuz breakin"; the cattle wuz lowin"
outside; a beam of light come through the winder and fell on the Old Man"s face,--perhaps it wuz the summons for which he waited and which shall some time come to me "nd you. Leastwise the Old Man roused from his sleep "nd opened up his big blue eyes. It wuzn"t me he wanted to see.
"Mudder! mudder!" cried the Old Man, but his voice warn"t strong "nd clear like it used to be. "Mudder, where _be_ you, mudder?"
Then, breshin" by me, Lizzie caught the Old Man up "nd held him in her arms, like she had done a thousand times before.
"What is it, darlin"? _Here_ I be," says Lizzie.
"Tum here," says the Old Man,--"tum here; I wanter tell you sumfin"."
The Old Man went to reach his arms around her neck "nd whisper in her ear. But his arms fell limp and helpless-like, "nd the Old Man"s curly head drooped on his mother"s breast.
1889.
Bill, the Lokil Editor.
BILL, THE LOKIL EDITOR.
Bill wuz alluz fond uv children "nd birds "nd flowers. Aint it kind o"
curious how sometimes we find a great, big, awkward man who loves sech things? Bill had the biggest feet in the township, but I"ll bet my wallet that he never trod on a violet in all his life. Bill never took no slack from enny man that wuz sober, but the children made him play with "em, and he"d set for hours a-watchin" the yaller-hammer buildin"
her nest in the old cottonwood.
Now I aint defendin" Bill; I"m jest tellin" the truth about him. Nothink I kin say one way or t"other is goin" to make enny difference now; Bill"s dead "nd buried, "nd the folks is discussin" him "nd wond"rin"
whether his immortal soul is all right. Sometimes I _hev_ worried "bout Bill, but I don"t worry "bout him no more. Uv course Bill had his faults,--I never liked that drinkin" business uv his"n, yet I allow that Bill got more good out"n likker, and likker got more good out"n Bill, than I ever see before or sence. It warn"t when the likker wuz in Bill that Bill wuz at his best, but when he hed been on to one uv his bats "nd had drunk himself sick "nd wuz comin" out uv the other end of the bat, then Bill wuz one uv the meekest "nd properest critters you ever seen. An" potry? Some uv the most beautiful potry I ever read wuz writ by Bill when he wuz recoverin" himself out"n one uv them bats. Seemed like it kind uv exalted an" purified Bill"s nachur to git drunk an" git over it. Bill cud drink more likker "nd be sorrier for it than any other man in seven States. There never wuz a more penitent feller than he wuz when he wuz soberin". The trubble with Bill seemed to be that his conscience didn"t come on watch quite of"n enuff.
It"ll be ten years come nex" spring sence Bill showed up here. I don"t know whar he come from; seemed like he didn"t want to talk about his past. I allers suspicioned that he had seen trubble--maybe, sorrer. I reecollect that one time he got a telegraph,--Mr. Ivins told me "bout it afterwards,--and when he read it he put his hands up to his face "nd groaned, like. That day he got full uv likker "nd he kep" full of likker for a week; but when he come round all right he wrote a pome for the paper, "nd the name of the pome wuz "Mary," but whether Mary wuz his sister or his wife or an old sweetheart uv his"n I never knew. But it looked from the pome like she wuz dead "nd that he loved her.
Bill wuz the best lokil the paper ever had. He didn"t hustle around much, but he had a kind er pleasin" way uv dishin" things up. He cud be mighty comical when he sot out to be, but his best holt was serious pieces. n.o.body could beat Bill writin" obituaries. When old Mose Holbrook wuz dyin" the minister sez to him: "Mr. Holbrook, you seem to be sorry that you"re pa.s.sin" away to a better land?"
"Wall, no; not exactly _that_," sez Mose, "but to be frank with you, I _hev_ jest one regret in connection with this affair."
"What"s that?" asked the minister.
"I can"t help feelin" sorry," sez Mose, "that I aint goin" to hev the pleasure uv readin" what Bill Newton sez about me in the paper. I know it"ll be sumthin" uncommon fine; I loant him two dollars a year ago last fall."
The Higginses lost a darned good friend when Bill died. Bill wrote a pome "bout their old dog Towze when he wuz run over by Watkins"s hay wagon seven years ago. I"ll bet that pome is in every sc.r.a.p-book in the county. You couldn"t read that pome without cryin",--why, that pome wud hev brought a dew out on the desert uv Sary. Old Tim Hubbard, the meanest man in the State, borrered a paper to read the pome, and he wuz so "fected by it that he never borrered anuther paper as long as he lived. I don"t more"n half reckon, though, that the Higginses appreciated what Bill had done for "em. I never heerd uv their givin"
him anythink more"n a basket uv greenin" apples, and Bill wrote a piece "bout the apples nex" day.
But Bill wuz at his best when he wrote things about the children,--about the little ones that died, I mean. Seemed like Bill had a way of his own of sayin" things that wuz beautiful "nd tender; he said he loved the children because they wuz innocent, and I reckon--yes, I know he did, for the pomes he writ about "em showed he did.
When our little Alice died I started out for Mr. Miller"s; he wuz the undertaker. The night wuz powerful dark, "nd it wuz all the darker to me, because seemed like all the light hed gone out in my life. Down near the bridge I met Bill; he weaved round in the road, for he wuz in likker.
"h.e.l.lo, Mr. Baker," sez he, "whar be you goin" this time o" night?"
"Bill," sez I, "I"m goin" on the saddest errand uv my life."
"What d"ye mean?" sez he, comin" up to me as straight as he cud.
"Why, Bill," sez I, "our little girl--my little girl--Allie, you know--she"s dead."
I hoa.r.s.ed up so I couldn"t say much more. And Bill didn"t say nothink at all; he jest reached me his hand, and he took my hand and seemed like in that grasp his heart spoke many words of comfort to mine. And nex" day he had a piece in the paper about our little girl; we cut it out and put it in the big Bible in the front room. Sometimes when we get to fussin", Martha goes "nd gets that bit of paper "nd reads it to me; then us two kind uv cry to ourselves, "nd we make it up between us for the dead child"s sake.
Well, you kin see how it wuz that so many uv us liked Bill; he had soothed our hearts,--there"s nothin" like sympathy after all. Bill"s potry hed heart in it; it didn"t surprise you or scare you; it jest got down in under your vest, "nd before you knew it you wuz all choked up. I know all about your fashionable potry and your famous potes,--Martha took G.o.dey"s for a year. Folks that live in the city can"t write potry,--not the real, genuine article. To write potry, as I figure it, the heart must have somethin" to feed on; you can"t get that somethin"
whar there aint trees "nd gra.s.s "nd birds "nd flowers. Bill loved these things, and he fed his heart on "em, and that"s why his potry wuz so much better than anybody else"s.
I aint worryin" much about Bill now; I take it that everythink is for the best. When they told me that Bill died in a drunken fit I felt that his end oughter have come some other way,--he wuz too good a man for that. But maybe, after all, it was ordered for the best. Jist imagine Bill a-standin" up for jedgment; jist imagine that poor, sorrowful, shiverin" critter waitin" for his turn to come. Pictur", if you can, how full uv penitence he is, "nd how full uv potry "nd gentleness "nd misery. The Lord aint agoin" to be too hard on that poor wretch. Of course we can"t comprehend Divine mercy; we only know that it is full of compa.s.sion,--a compa.s.sion infinitely tenderer and sweeter than ours. And the more I think on "t, the more I reckon that Bill will plead to win that mercy, for, like as not, the little ones--my Allie with the rest--will run to him when they see him in his trubble and will hold his tremblin" hands "nd twine their arms about him, and plead, with him, for compa.s.sion.
You"ve seen an old sycamore that the lightnin" has struck; the ivy has reached up its vines "nd spread "em all around it "nd over it, coverin"
its scars "nd splintered branches with a velvet green "nd fillin" the air with fragrance. You"ve seen this thing and you know that it is beautiful.
That"s Bill, perhaps, as he stands up f"r jedgment,--a miserable, tremblin", "nd unworthy thing, perhaps, but twined about, all over, with singin" and pleadin" little children--and that is pleasin" in G.o.d"s sight, I know.
What would you--what would _I_--say, if we wuz setin" in jedgment then?
Why, we"d jest kind uv bresh the moisture from our eyes "nd say: "Mister recordin" angel, you may nolly pros this case "nd perseed with the docket."