After summer, we stepped into the busy year of Junior 3. I have always prioritized important matters above everything else, hence things like immersing myself in romantic love were promptly kicked to a side. Plus, Meteor Garden was airing fervently back then, so I changed to being crazy about Dao Ming Si instead.
The event that caused me to confirm my resolution to have being infatuated/fangirling over Jiang Chen as my life goal happened half a year later. The night before the mock exams, amidst my mom"s beatings and scoldings of, "How did I raise up such a forgetful pig-headed daughter like you?!", I hurriedly rushed to the Xue You* Bookshop to buy the 2B pencils I needed to shade the OAS for my mock exams the next day. (T/N: direct translation of Xue You - study friend)
Even though Xue You Bookstore claims to be a bookstore, but it sells a variety of things - from books and stationery to stickers and toys, basically, whatever was trending among students, it would sell. Later on after muddling through life in the outside world, I discovered that the two words "Xue You" was a name that all non-franchise stationery shops and book shops in the country liked to use. I didn"t know if this was because this name would cause numerous students to feel a sense of familiarity akin to seeing a friend, or if it was because everyone was lazy to come up with names. But if there was a day where I decide to give back to society, I would also want to open a Xue You shop, on the surface it would sell books and stationery, but it would actually be a centre of students to pay a fee and make friends, especially female students, though if there were special requests, we could also sell male students at a high price.
I entered Xue You and grabbed a bunch of 2B pencils. At that point in time, using computers to mark papers had just come into vogue. I thought that the 2B pencil would appreciate in price in the near future, and I had to stock up. But the truth proved otherwise. While the price of pencils did rise by ten cents, there were many pencils specially made for shading the OAS that were produced. While everyone else was using mechanical pencils to shade their OAS, I still had to pitifully use a knife to shave my pencils. Prophets are all lonely people.
As I clutched a bunch of pencils, about to pay, Jiang Chen entered through the door. Perhaps out of a strange adolescent voyeuristic mentality, I subconsciously grabbed a book off the shelf, using it to block my face as I secretly watched him.
Jiang Chen upon entering made an immediate beeline for the counter. The lady boss saw him, and smilingly carried up a pile of books from under the counter. "The embroidered collector"s edition of the Four Cla.s.sic Novels of Chinese Literature* you wanted, I specially went into the city to obtain its stock." (T/N: namely Romance of Three Kingdoms, Journey to the West, Water Margin and Dream of Red Mansions)
Jiang Chen smiled and said, "Thank you Lady Boss, how much is it?"
"853 RMB, I"ll take 850 from you." The lady boss took his money. "I"m not even counting in the transport fees."
Jiang Chen smilingly nodded his head. "Thank you Lady Boss."
At that point in time our school fees were 200 RMB per semester, Jiang Chen was using money worth two school years or four semesters to buy a few rotten books, if he had so much spare money, he might as well… Actually I also didn"t know what he might as well have done, I"ve never had so much money, so I was really didn"t understand. Previously, someone told me this joke - a news reporter asked an old woman who lived deep in the mountains, "What would you do if I gave you 100000 RMB?" She replied, "Eat vegetable steamed buns everyday." He asked again, "What if I gave you 200000 RMB?" She replied, "Eat meat steamed buns everyday." Lastly he asked, "What if I gave you 1000000 RMB?" She replied, "I would have a vegetable steamed bun in one hand and a meat steamed bun in the other everyday." I actually really empathized with the old woman"s plight.
"Gege*, gege." A child who had come out of nowhere was calling as he tugged on Jiang Chen"s trousers. (T/N: meaning older brother)
Jiang Chen squatted down and caressed his head. Blinking, he asked him, "Little friend, are you a boy or a girl?"
The little child sucked on his tiny thumb, and very seriously replied, "Boy."
Jiang Chen was dissatisfied. "I don"t like boys."
He was preparing to get up as he said that, the little child hurriedly tugged on his clothes. "I"m a girl."
Jiang Chen laughed. "So you"re actually a girl. Okay then, what did you call me for?"
The little child fished out a box of colour pencils and two crumpled ten-cent notes from the large pocket of his overalls, lifting them high up to demonstrate how he couldn"t reach the counter. "I"m buying this."
Jiang Chen took the box and stood up to pa.s.s it to the lady boss. "Boss, how much is this?"
"Ten RMB."
Jiang Chen fished out ten RMB. After paying the money, he then squatted back down to pa.s.s the box to the little child. He patted his head and said, "Here, your color pencils."
The little child chortled as he took the box. "Thank you gege."
After saying "you"re welcome", Jiang Chen prepared to stand up straight. The little child once again pulled at his trouser bottoms, so he could only squat back down again. The little child clumsily opened the box of colour pencils, and picking out a pink coloured one, said, "Drawing is very pretty."
"I don"t know how to draw." Jiang Chen said as he smiled. "You keep it for yourself to draw."
The little child shook his head, and pointing at the books in his hand, said, "No, I draw."
Jiang Chen stared blankly for a moment, then his face broke into a smile. He took out "Romance of the Three Kingdoms" and handed it over to the little child.
The little child held up the book and sat on the floor, lowering his head to draw something on it very seriously, while muttering something to himself. At last he clapped his hands and said, "Done."
I tiptoed and stuck out my head to peep at it, that design looked like a rabbit at first glance, then looked like a dog when you looked more closely, yet its poise and charm also somewhat resembled a tiger.
Jiang Chen, taking back the book, looked at it very seriously, then said seriously, "The dog you drew is very beautiful, thank you."
The little child, fluttering his round eyes, said, "It"s a cat."
Jiang Chen did a double take, then laughed. "So it"s actually a cat."
I stared at his dimple, it seemed to have deepened somewhat, I really wanted to go up to him and poke it.
What is known as "being stunned by beauty", what is known as "being killed in a second". Li Bi Hua* once said - being stunned by beauty back at that time, was wholly because one had seen little of the world. But this wasn"t the case for me, in the times to come, I would repeatedly embellish these two scenes in my mind, just like the post-production editing for movies and television. I would adjust the angle of the scene, add light and shadow variation, layer on sound effects…… (T/N: a famous Chinese author/scriptwriter - she wrote Farewell My Concubine)
"How long are you going to squat at the hospital entrance for?"
"Ah?" With my great post-production editing project being interrupted, I was momentarily a little lost. Gazing into Jiang Chen"s somewhat impatient-looking face, I again sounded, "Ah?"
"Get up." He stretched out his hand and with one grab pulled me up from the floor, dragging me towards the ambulance. In fact, I really wanted to ask him if he had forgotten to let go of my hand, and also if he was in poor health lately, his hand was so sweaty…
When we got onto the ambulance, the driver and my mom simultaneously showed facial expressions looking like they had just caught us in bed together. I helplessly rolled my eyes, and peeped at Jiang Chen a little apprehensively. He on the other hand seemed to be totally unaffected and sat by my side. "Little Li, start driving."
After that, he turned his head around to tell my mom, "Auntie, I"ve already spoken to my colleague in orthopedics, when we reach the hospital, we"ll take another x-ray, if there is no issue, we"ll do the operation this afternoon. Please do not worry, my colleague is one of the very best orthopedic surgeons in the industry."
My mom hurriedly nodded her head incessantly, and gave a really motherly smile. "We"re really troubling you."
"It"s no trouble, it"s what I should do." Jiang Chen was also really smiling like a filial son.
"So noisy!" My dad suddenly spoke up loudly.
Ever since my dad was informed that we were going to transfer hospitals with the help of Jiang Chen, he had been throwing a tantrum. Later on, the moment my mom walked away, he gave me a tongue-lashing, its contents being nothing else but one word - backbone! He felt that after how Jiang Chen"s mother treated me back in the day, I should stay far, far away from him. It was best that I spit him in the face with saliva when I saw him to express my disdain, but now I had gone as far as to accept his favor!
Three years ago, I graduated from X University"s art design faculty. Jiang Chen was studying both his bachelor"s and master"s degree consecutively in medical school and had to study for seven years, but due to his excellent performance, he had already begun to intern at the various major departments at X University"s subsidiary hospital by his fourth year.
Back then, Jiang Chen was really good to me, the moment he saw me receive my graduation certificate, he said that he wanted to marry me. Of course, this was mainly because I was always making baseless fabrications about a bunch of the so-called elite in society to scare him. For example, the manager who helped me open the door every day (whose original form was the security guard of our company, for I always forgot to bring my entrance card to tap in and out); the director who was always giving me flowers (whose original form was the person who sold flowers downstairs - when I was working overtime late into the night, I would always run into him throwing away the spoilt flowers that couldn"t be sold while on my way home, with my fervent hints, he would give the flowers to me); the client who treated me to watch a movie (whose original form was indeed a client, and I did indeed watch a movie, it was just that I had to write a publicity proposal report for them after watching it)…… An artistic creation requires an original form.
Once Jiang Chen heard that I was so popular, he became anxious, he said that the four years" worth of breakfasts he delivered in university must not be delivered in vain, we had better get married.
I agreed with no sense of shame whatsoever. My thoughts were very simple, the faculty of medicine in X University was ranked no. 1 in the entire country, and Jiang Chen was getting the top-tier scholarship every year, there was basically no suspense that he was a stock with great potential. I had to capture him as soon as possible, such that when he became a blue chip stock*, I would be the grain-husk wife who had suffered trials and tribulations together with him, if he dared to divorce me, I would dare to ask for a half of his a.s.sets……(T/N: aka stocks of financially stable and well-known companies that have good returns)
Of course, actually the simplest thought was that I loved him very much, and I was afraid he would be s.n.a.t.c.hed away by someone else. One time, I went to the hospital he was interning at to look for him, and within one hour I saw three patients giving him their business cards, with one of them even being a guy. This society was too terrifying, and Jiang Chen"s charisma seemed to slay both men and women.
It was just that back in the day, I was almost completely poisoned by television dramas and novels, and I thought that my love was invincible. But Jiang Chen"s mother made me realise, once my love experienced disturbances, it changed as it pleased.
One fine afternoon, Jiang Chen"s mother paid a visit to my mom. My mom"s status in my household, being a professional housewife, was akin to that of Wu Ze Tian*, but for the first time, I saw that plucky mother of mine being at such a complete loss of what to do, becoming meek without herself even noticing. To be fair, Jiang Chen"s mother didn"t say any undue remark, and she hadn"t fished out a cheque and said, "Leave my son, tell me how much money you want." She was calmly discussing with my mom some wedding customs, but it was just the condescending att.i.tude, like she was lowering herself to talk to my mom, that she exuded that caused my mom to be filled with trepidation. Watching my mom from the side as she rubbed her hands, saying, "We"ll cooperate, we"ll cooperate", my heart was tart and painful, like it had been soaked in old vinegar. (T/N: the only female emperor in the history of China)
Jiang Chen"s mother then sought me out one-to-one for a chat. She gave me a few pieces of paper and told me to take a good look, and if I agreed, to give my signature. It was a prenuptial agreement, with its contents roughly being something along the lines of how I was not marrying Jiang Chen for his family"s money, and if we divorced, I wouldn"t be able to get any a.s.sets, etcetera.
At that point in time, I was really bewildered. His dad was just the mayor of a small town, how much money could he possibly have? Was there really a need to act like we were in a television drama?
I"ve already forgotten what I was thinking at that time, perhaps it was some n.o.ble matters like love and self-respect, but later I simply could not make up my mind, so I went to ask my dad. All I can say is that, that was a historic mistake.
Jiang Chen"s dad was my dad"s indirect supervisor. My dad felt that he was already such a wimp, being bullied and pushed around by these supervisors on a day-to-day basis, but for the family of his supervisor to bully his own family members, this was a matter that he simply couldn"t stand. Therefore he told me that if I dared sign, he would disown me as his daughter.
Thus, I again did yet another stupid thing, which was to give Jiang Chen the prenuptial agreement for him to return it to his mother. Jiang Chen was really agitated and furious, and went home to quarrel with his mother. Later on, his mother gave me a phone call, with the main idea being, if I dared get married to Jiang Chen, she would dare to die at our wedding. Back then, I had little experience in society, so I was immediately psyched out by her. I totally didn"t think of any other ways to resolve the issue, for example to not hold a wedding ceremony, so that she wouldn"t have a place to die……
The matter of marriage was hence left unsettled just like that, after that, I didn"t know why, but perhaps work started to get busy, I was busy getting scolded by my manager, while Jiang Chen was busy attending cla.s.ses and interning. Plus, most likely I started bearing grudges in my heart, I would incessantly nit-pick and needle him, and would provoke him over the most trivial and inconsequential matters. I tested our love by testing his tolerance.
When I said, "Jiang Chen, let"s break up."
He was silent for a long time before saying, "Don"t you regret it." Then he slammed the door with a bang and left.
I thought that for two people who loved each other to break up, there should at least be some large-scale major event, for example, a third party; for example, suddenly discovering that I was his father"s illegitimate daughter; for example, either him or I contracting a terminal illness…… But in fact, there was no need for that. Uneasiness, busyness and weariness were enough.
We split up just like that. It was quite amazing, two people who had originally agreed to be together for a whole lifetime, now had absolutely nothing to do with each other in just a flash. For a long period of time, I even suspected that perhaps someone had pressed the fast-forward b.u.t.ton for us, causing me to omit some plot circ.u.mstances that made the break-up an inevitability.
My dad was the happiest about my breakup with Jiang Chen. He most likely felt that this was one victory he had in his confrontation with those of a supervisor social cla.s.s. But towards a later stage, my constant inability to find a boyfriend caused him to feel that the fruits of victory were sometimes bitter as well.
So I guess my dad"s feelings towards Jiang Chen were complicated. On one hand, he hoped that there would be someone who would take over the slow-moving product* that I was, yet on the other hand, he also felt that he would much rather I be a slow-moving product than to sell me to Jiang Chen. He was probably experiencing internal turmoil akin to that of the capitalists existing during the Great Depression mentioned in our high school politics textbook who would rather pour milk into the river than give it to the poor. (T/N: meaning a product that sells poorly)
What I didn"t tell my dad was that actually, that person wasn"t even intending to buy from you.
Translator’s Corner:
h.e.l.lo lovelies here! I will be working with (please drop some love on her tumblr for this chapter) on translating this novel, so you guys can expect faster updates yay!