"And would you, indeed if you could?" demanded Mrs. Reade, holding her by her wrists and looking imploringly into her face. "Do you really mean that you have a mind to do such a thing, Rachel?"
Rachel was silent for a few seconds and then she began to cry bitterly.
"Oh, I don"t know--I don"t know!" she said, turning her head wildly from side to side. "Sometimes I feel one way and sometimes another. I want somebody--somebody strong, like Roden--to tell me what it is right to do!"
For a moment Mrs. Reade weighed the merits of the proposition, and all that lay against it, with as near an approach to impartial judgment as true friendship and human fallibility allowed. And the thought of Rachel"s weakness of purpose and inability to take care of herself, and of Mr. Dalrymple"s traditional character, turned the scale.
"You cannot go back _now_," she said. "My darling, you have doubly given yourself to Mr. Kingston, and you must try to make yourself happy with him--much can be done by trying, if you will only make up your mind!"
It was the last chance that Rachel had, and she accepted the fate that deprived her of it with characteristic meekness.
"Yes, I will try," she said, wiping her eyes. "It is too late to go back now."
CHAPTER II.
"WHEN YULE IS COLD."
Rachel, when she did at last get married, had a very stately wedding, if that was any comfort to her. The weather was beautiful, to begin with; a lovelier autumn morning even Australia could not have furnished, to be an omen of good luck for the future years.
Each of the eight young Melbourne belles who had been invited to a.s.sist at the interesting ceremony took care to point out the significance of sunshine and a cloudless sky when offering their congratulations to the bride and to the bridegroom also.
The bridegroom on this occasion by no means filled the humble office which tradition and custom a.s.signed to him. There was not a bridesmaid of them all who did not feel that she was much more Mr. Kingston"s bridesmaid than Mrs. Kingston"s.
Not only were they better acquainted and on more friendly terms generally with him than with her, but he had far more to say to them, and practically far more to do with them, in the course of the day and in the discharge of his and their official duties.
He was the prince of bridegrooms, indeed. He had made magnificent settlements upon his wife (though the credit of that really belonged to Mr. Hardy, who, for once in a way, had to be reckoned with in the progress of these arrangements); and his wedding presents were on an equally n.o.ble scale.
The bridesmaids" bracelets were solid evidences of his worth in every sense of the term, and inasmuch as each bracelet slightly differed from the rest, though all were equally costly, of the excellence of his taste and tact. They were valued thereafter by their respective recipients rather as parting keepsakes from their bachelor friend than as mementoes of his auspicious marriage.
And the diamond necklace that was his special wedding-day gift to his bride, and which lay just under the ruffled lace encircling her white throat--a dazzling ring of shifting lights and colours--a magnet to the eyes of all spectators--was worthy to have been a gift from Solomon to the Queen of Sheba.
There was not a servant in the house, nor near it, who did not receive some token of the princely fashion in which he improved this great occasion, and who did not partic.i.p.ate in the general impression that he more than rivalled, in popularity and importance, the beautiful young lady whom he had won.
Of the company, all were charmed with his gaiety, his affability, and his delightful _sang-froid_. He was never for a moment embarra.s.sed. He overflowed with airy courtesies, not only to his bride, but to all her maids and friends.
He made a brilliant speech, that exactly hit the happy medium between tearful pathos and unfeeling jocularity, and that was full of well-bred witticisms, provocative of gentle, well-bred laughter. He was, in short, all that a bridegroom ought to be, and so very seldom is. He covered himself with honour.
Rachel, on the contrary, seemed to have been mesmerised into temporary lifelessness. It was expected that she would be shy and fluttered, and bathed in blushes; but she was not agitated at all, and she did not blush at all. She bore herself generally with a statuesque composure that was thought by some to be very dignified, and by others very wooden and stupid, and that was a little depressing to witness from either point of view. From the beginning of the day she wore this unnatural calmness.
Mrs. Reade had been in terror lest she should give way to unbecoming excitement at some stage of the ceremonies, and was prepared to combat the first symptoms of hysteria with such material and moral remedies as were most likely to be efficacious.
She had strictly enjoined Lucilla, who had brought the baby to the wedding, not to let that irresistible child appear upon any account, and bidden her restrict herself to the most perfunctory caresses until the public ordeal was over. But long ere this point was reached the little woman was longing to see some signs of the emotional weakness that she had deprecated, and there were none.
The bride was as beautiful as a sculptor"s ideal, but as cold as the marble which dimly embodies it. She had apparently nerved herself for a sacrificial rite, or else the greatness of her suffering had numbed her; or she was calm with resignation and despair.
"I wish," said Mrs. Reade to herself, in the middle of the marriage service, "I wish I had stopped it last night. I have made a mistake."
But as this thought occurred to her, she was standing--a splendid little figure in ruby velvet and antique lace--in the midst of scores of other splendid figures, a helpless witness to the irrevocable consummation of her mistake, which after all was less hers than anybody"s.
Rachel had given her "troth" to her husband, and he was putting the ring that was the sign and seal of it--the token and pledge of the solemn vow and covenant betwixt them made--upon her finger.
When the breakfast was over, that domestic pendant to the religious ceremony having "gone off" with great success, Mrs. Kingston, in due course, retired to put on her travelling dress.
The bridesmaids proper were dispensed with at this stage, and the two married cousins went upstairs with the bride.
It was Beatrice now who was tender and caressing; Lucilla, who did not see very far below the surface of anything, and was delighted with the pomp and circ.u.mstance of this new alliance in the family, and charmed, like all happy matrons, to welcome a new comer into the matrimonial ranks, overflowed with unwonted gaiety.
"Now we are _all_ married!" she exclaimed, sinking upon a sofa in Rachel"s room, and looking very fair and young--as if marriage had thoroughly agreed with her--in a pale blue French dress of the highest fashion. "And we have all married so well, haven"t we? And we have all got such good husbands. Oh, how nice it will be when Rachel and Laura come back and begin housekeeping! John is going to let me have a house in town, too, as soon as Isabel and Bruce come home, so that we shall be down for part of the year; and then what a cosy little family circle we shall make! But Rachel will be at the head of us all. Ah, dear child, you will know now how nice it is to be a married woman--to have your own husband with you always--such a delightful, attentive husband, too, as I know he will be--and your own home--such a beautiful home----"
"You lock up her diamonds, Lucilla," Mrs. Reade interrupted, handing the starry necklace to her sister. "And, Rachel, dear, don"t stand and tire yourself. Sit down, and let me dress you."
Rachel, when her bridal lace and satin had been taken off, sat down to be sponged and brushed, and to have her travelling boots laced up.
Beatrice performed her lady"s-maid offices in silence, while Lucilla handed her what she wanted, and pleasantly chatted on; and when all was done, and the bride, in russet homespun, was ready for her departure, there were a few words whispered that Mrs. Thornley did not hear.
"My darling, you _said_ you would try."
"Yes, Beatrice, dear; yes, I am trying."
"You are not finding it very hard--too hard--are you?"
"It will be easier in a little while."
"If you make an effort, Rachel--if you make up your mind--if you are kind and good to your husband, and try to keep him straight, and to make his home happy----"
"Yes, dear; yes. I am going to do all I can. But to-day I can only feel that I have lost--_quite_ lost--Roden. I feel now as if he were dead.
Even the memory of him I must not comfort myself with any more. That is what I feel hard. But I am trying to get over it. I have promised Mr.
Kingston--Graham--all those solemn promises, and I _must_ keep them--I will. It is only at first that I don"t know how to bear it; but it will be easier by-and-bye. We must not talk about it, Beatrice; it is wrong to talk about it now. And, oh! I do so dread that I shall break down."
She did break down at last. When she descended the staircase into the hall she found all the company awaiting her, the front door open, and the carriage that was to take her away being packed with her travelling bags and wraps.
She shook hands with all the guests, and smiled a gentle response to their congratulatory farewells; she shook hands with John and his fellow-servants; she kissed her uncle and thanked him for all his kindness to her; she embraced Lucilla and Beatrice with silent fervour, and then her stately aunt, to whom she repeated her grateful acknowledgements for the home and care that had been given her.
"I am afraid I have not made much return to you for your goodness to me, dear Aunt Elizabeth," she said, with pathetic earnestness, but with no agitation of voice or manner.
To her intense surprise the majestic woman suddenly burst into tears.
"Oh, my child!" she said, tenderly, "I hope I have been as good an aunt to you as you have been a good niece to me. I hope you will be very, very happy, my darling. If you are not, I shall never forgive myself."
Mr. Kingston, of course, was standing by, and a frown fell like a cloud over his face. Mrs. Reade was also standing by, and she looked at him steadily for a few seconds with clear, bright eyes.
"Come, Rachel," he said, and he only looked at his wife; "we shall lose our train if we don"t make haste."
Rachel withdrew herself from her aunt"s arms, and Mr. Kingston took her by the hand and led her away, followed from the house to her carriage by all her train. She was a good deal shaken by the little incident that had so unexpectedly occurred.