April 9. Celle. Yesterday morning I drove with my father to Halberstadt, where, with many tears, he separated from me. I was alone in the mail, which was a great comfort to me. It was a solemn time. I found myself again on the road to Brunswick, which I had traversed twice in the service of the devil, and now I was traveling on it in the name of Jesus. I discerned, in pa.s.sing, the inn at Wolfenb.u.t.tel, from whence I intended to run away, and where I was arrested. How peculiar were my feelings! In the evening we reached Brunswick, from whence we started the same night.
During the night I heard a fearfully wicked, most profligate, infidel, and scoffing conversation between the conducteur and a student, and the only testimony I gave was, complete silence all the time. I arrived here this morning at eight, and have been here all the morning, as the mail will not start for Hamburg until four this afternoon. It has been far from well with me in my soul today. That awful conversation last night has been spiritual poison to me. How"s very soon do we, even unconsciously, receive evil!
April 10. Hamburg. I arrived here at ten this morning.--April 11. I went on board last night, and at twelve we sailed. This morning at half-past eleven we arrived at Cuxhaven, where we cast anchor, on account of a strong contrary wind.--April 13. Though I desired as much, perhaps, as any of the pa.s.sengers speedily to get to the end of our voyage, longing to get back again to my work in Bristol, and also to my wife and children, yet I was kept in peace; and whilst some murmured at the contrary wind, the Lord enabled me to lift up my heart in prayer that He would calm it, if it were His holy will, and, accordingly, after a delay of about nineteen hours, we plied again yesterday morning, at seven. At ten I was taken with sea sickness, from which I had been kept during my four previous short voyages in answer to prayer; but this time I on purpose refrained from praying about it, as I did not know whether it was better for my health to be seasick or not. The sickness continued the whole of yesterday. Today I am well. We have fine and calm weather. I consider it a mercy that the Lord has allowed me to be sea-sick.
April 15. Bristol. Yesterday at one we landed in London. In answer to prayer I soon obtained my things from the Custom-house, and reached my friends in Chancery Lane a little before two, where I found a letter from my wife, stating that brother Craik is ill, having an inflammation in the wind-pipe, and therefore, humanly speaking, will be unable to preach for some time. In consequence of this I started immediately for Bristol, where I arrived this morning. I found brother Craik better than I had expected, though completely unable to attend to the ministry of the Word.
April 16. Today brother Craik and I received 11l. 15s. 9d. each, being a legacy left to us some time since. We said once or twice to one another, that perhaps this money might be paid at a time when we much needed it.
And so it is just now. May I and all my brethren leave the management of all our affairs entirely to the Lord, who best knows what is good for us; and may it be our concern to seek first the kingdom of G.o.d and His righteousness, and all temporal supplies shall be added to us!
May 1. I went to see brother Craik, and found him better, but heard from his medical attendant that he ought not to preach for several months. May 5. My father-in-law has been for several days very ill. May 15. Mr. Groves continues very ill. May 29. This morning brother Craik went into Devonshire for change of air.
June 3. Today we had a public meeting on account of the Scriptural Knowledge Inst.i.tution for home and abroad. It is now fifteen months, since, in dependence upon the Lord for the supply of means, we have been enabled to provide poor children with schooling, circulate the Holy Scriptures, and aid missionary labours. During this time, though the field of labour has been continually enlarged, and though we have now and then been brought low in funds, the Lord has never allowed us to be obliged to stop the work. We have been enabled during this time to establish three day-schools, and to connect with the Inst.i.tution two other charity day-schools, which, humanly speaking, otherwise would have been closed for want of means. In addition to this, the expenses connected with a Sunday-school and an adult school have been likewise defrayed, making seven schools altogether. The number of the children that have been thus provided with schooling, in the day-schools only, amounts to 439. The number of copies of the Holy Scriptures, which have been circulated, is 795 Bibles and 753 New Testaments. We have also sent, in aid of missionary labours in Canada, in the East Indies, and on the Continent of Europe, 117l. 11s. The whole amount of the free-will offerings put into our hands for carrying on this work, from March 5, 1834, to May 19, 1835, is 363l.
12s. 0 3/4d.
June 20. Our father is evidently today near his end. June 22. This morning at two our father died. June 23. Both our children are ill. June 24. Our little boy is very ill. June 25. The dear little boy is so ill, that I have no hope of his recovery. The disease is inflammation on the chest. I spoke this evening comfortably at Gideon, on Psalm cxlv. 1-4, thinking it right that neither the death of my father-in-law, nor my dying child should keep me from the Lord"s work. The Lord"s holy will be done concerning the dear little one. June 26. My prayer last evening was, that G.o.d would be pleased to support my dear wife under the trial, should He remove the little one; and to take him soon to Himself, thus sparing him from suffering. I did not pray for the child"s recovery. It was but two hours after that the dear little one went home. The eldest and the youngest the Lord has thus removed from our family in the same week. My dear Mary feels her loss much, but yet is greatly supported. As to myself, I am so fully enabled to realize that the dear infant is so much better off with the Lord Jesus than with us, that I scarcely feel the loss at all, and when I weep, I weep for joy.
June 27. My dear wife is graciously supported. May the Lord grant that these afflictions may not be lost upon us! June 28. I preached today both times comfortably. June 29. This morning was the funeral. The remains of our father and infant were put into the same grave.
July 3. Our taxes are due, and may be called for any day, and for the first time we have no money to pay them, as we were obliged, on account of our late afflictions, to spend the money which we had put by for them. May the Lord in mercy provide! July 6. I was enabled today, by the free-will offerings through the boxes, and by what I had left, to pay the taxes before they were called for. How kind of the Lord to answer my prayer so soon! July 8. This evening I had 5l. sent from Weston-super-Mare. So the Lord has again appeared. May I praise His holy name for this seasonable help, which came when I had scarcely any money left! July 14. Today I had again a suit of new clothes given to me by a brother. My clothes were much worn and old, and our late funeral might have given a second reason for having new ones. But I did not order any, because I had no money to pay for them, and thought it wrong to contract debts.--A fresh paper was brought in today for taxes, which ought to have been asked for many months since. May the Lord give us the means to pay them!
July 15. We had again an especial prayer-meeting for the restoration of brother Craik, who, though well in his general health, is yet unable to preach, or even to converse for any length of time. July 18. I have felt for several days weak in my chest. This weakness has been increasing, and today I have felt it more than ever. I have thought it well to refrain next week from all public speaking. May the Lord grant that I may be brought nearer to Him through this, for I am not at all in the state in which I ought to be, and I think sometimes that our late afflictions have been lost upon me, and that the Lord will need to chastise me severely.
July 22. The last mentioned taxes were called for this morning, just after the Lord had sent us 5l., from a distance of about eighty miles. So the Lord has again of late, repeatedly, in answer to prayer, sent help.
May this lead us to trust in Him for the future! July 28. Since the 14th I have felt unwell, and though sometimes a little better, on the whole I have been getting worse and worse. This morning I have seen our medical attendant, who thinks that all the disease arises from a disordered stomach.
July 31. Today brother C-r, formerly a minister in the establishment, who came to us a few days since, began, in connexion with the Scriptural Knowledge Inst.i.tution, to go from house to house, to spread the truth as a city missionary. [This was a remarkable interposition of G.o.d. Brother Craik had before this, for some months, been unable on account of bodily infirmity, to labour in the work of the schools, the circulation of the Scriptures, &c., and my own weakness, shortly after brother C-r"s arrival, increased so that I was obliged to give up the work entirely: How gracious, therefore, of the Lord, to send brother C-r, that thus the work might go on! Up to July, 1837, this brother was enabled to continue in his work, and thus this little Inst.i.tution was in a most important way enlarged as it regards the field of labour.]
August 15. Today dear brother Craik returned from Devonshire, much better in his general health, but not better as it regards his voice.--August 24.
I feel very weak, and suffer more than before from the disease. I am in doubt whether to leave Bristol entirely for a time. I have no money to go away for a change of air. I have had an invitation to stay for a week with a sister in the country, and I think of accepting the invitation, and going tomorrow. August 26. Today I had 5l. given to me for the express purpose of using change of air. Aug. 29. Today I received another 5l. for the same purpose.
August 30. Today, for the first Lord"s day since our arrival in Bristol, I have been kept from preaching through illness. How mercifully has the Lord dealt in giving me so much strength for these years! I had another 5l. sent, to aid me in procuring change of air. How kind is the Lord in thus providing me with the means of leaving Bristol! September 2. Went with my family to Portishead. September 3 to 5. I read the lives of the English martyrs at the time of the reformation. My spirit has been greatly refreshed. May the Lord help me to follow these holy men as far as they followed Christ! Of all reading, besides that of the Holy Scriptures, which should be always THE book, THE CHIEF book to us, not merely in theory, but also in practice, such like books seem to me the most useful for the growth of the inner man. Yet one has to be cautious in the choice, and to guard against reading too much. At such a time as the present, when my mind and body are too weak for much exertion, as the study of the Word, conversation, writing letters, or walking, &c., I find it most refreshing to read a few pages of this kind, though these last six years I have not read the fifth part, perhaps not the tenth part as much of other books as of the Holy Scriptures.
September 14. We are still at Portishead. I am but little better. I am greatly bowed down today on account of my inward corruptions and carnality of heart. When will G.o.d deliver me from this state?! How I long to be more like Him! My present way of living is also a great trial to me. The caring so much about the body; the having for my chief employment eating and drinking, walking, bathing, and taking horse exercise; all this to which I have not been at all accustomed these six years, I find to be very trying.
I would much rather be again in the midst of the work in Bristol, if my Lord will condescend to use His most unworthy servant.
September 15. As I clearly understood that the person, who lets me his horse, has no license, I saw, that being bound as a believer to act according to the laws of the country, I could use it no longer: and as horse exercise seems most important, humanly speaking, for my restoration, and as this is the only horse, which is to be had in the place, we came to the conclusion to leave Portishead tomorrow. Immediately after, I received a kind letter from a brother and two sisters in the Lord, who lived in the Isle of Wight, which contained a fourth invitation, more pressing than ever, to come and stay with them for some time. In addition to this, they wrote that they had repeatedly prayed about the matter, and were persuaded that I ought to come. This matter has been today a subject for prayer and consideration to us.
September 16. We came this morning to the conclusion to leave Portishead today, and that I should go to the Isle of Wight; but we saw not how my wife and child and our servant could accompany me, as we had not sufficient money for traveling expenses; and yet this seemed of importance, as otherwise my wife would be overburdened in my absence, and my mind would not be sufficiently free; and besides this, she also seems to need change of air. The Lord graciously removed the difficulty this evening; for we received most unexpectedly and unasked for 6l. 13s., which was owed to us, and, also, when we had already retired to rest, a letter was brought, containing a present of 2l. How very, very kind, and tender is the Lord!
September 19. This evening we arrived at our friends" in the Isle of Wight, by whom we were most kindly received.--September 21 to 26. Nothing remarkable has occurred. I feel very comfortable in this place, and find my stay here refreshing to my soul. My health is about the same. I am not fit for mental exercise, and am soon fatigued even by conversation. I have read during the last days, with great interest and admiration of the goodness of G.o.d, and to the refreshment of my soul, the life of John Newton, and the lives of some of the English martyrs at the time of the reformation.
Sept. 27. Today I am thirty years of age. I feel myself an unprofitable servant. How much more might I have lived for G.o.d than I have done! May the Lord grant, that, if I am allowed to stay a few days more in this world, they may be spent entirely for Him! September 29. Last evening, when I retired from the family, I had a desire to go to rest at once, for I had prayed a short while before; and feeling weak in body, the coldness of the night was a temptation for me to pray no further. However, the Lord did help me to fall upon my knees; and no sooner had I commenced praying, than He shone into my soul, and gave me such a spirit of prayer, as I had not enjoyed for many weeks. He graciously once more revived His work in my heart. I enjoyed that nearness to G.o.d and fervency in prayer, for more than an hour, for which my soul had been panting for many weeks past. For the first time, during this illness, I had now also a spirit of prayer as it regards my health. I could ask the Lord earnestly to restore me again, which had not been the case before. I now long to go back again to the work in Bristol, yet without impatience, and feel a.s.sured that the Lord will strengthen me to return to it. I went to bed especially happy and awoke this morning in great peace, rose sooner than usual, and had again, for more than an hour, real communion with the Lord before breakfast. May He in mercy continue this state of heart to His most unworthy child!
October 8. My strength has been during the last days increasing, but I feel still the symptoms of indigestion. I have been able to speak several times at family prayer, and to expound the Scriptures to the school children, without suffering in consequence of it.
October 9. I have many times had thoughts of giving in print some account of the Lord"s goodness to me, for the instruction, comfort, and encouragement of the children of G.o.d; and I have been more than ever stirred up to do so since I read Newton"s life a few days ago. I have considered, today, all the reasons for and against, and find that there are scarcely any against, and many for it.
October 15. Today we left our dear friends for Bristol. November 15.
Brother C-r and I have been praying together, the last five days, that the Lord would be pleased to send us means for the carrying on of the work of the Scriptural Knowledge Inst.i.tution. This evening a brother gave me 6s.
1d., being money which he formerly used to pay towards the support of a trade club, which he has lately given up for the Lord"s sake.--November 18.
This evening 30 was given to me; 25. for the Scriptural Knowledge Inst.i.tution, and 5. for myself. This is a most remarkable answer to prayer. Brother C-r and I have prayed repeatedly together during the last week, concerning the work, and especially that the Lord would be pleased to give us the means to continue, and even to enlarge, the field. In addition to this, I have several times asked for a supply for myself, and He has kindly granted both these requests. Oh that I may have grace to trust Him more and more!--November 20. This evening I took tea at a sister"s house, where I found Franke"s life. I have frequently, for a long time, thought of labouring in a similar way, though it might be on a much smaller scale; not, to imitate Franke, but in reliance upon the Lord. May G.o.d make it plain! November 21. Today I have had it very much impressed on my heart, no longer merely to think about the establishment of an Orphan-House, but actually to set about it, and I have been very much in prayer respecting it, in order to ascertain the Lord"s mind.--I received this day, from an unexpected quarter, 5.
for the Scriptural Knowledge Inst.i.tution, in answer to prayer; and I had also 1. 14s. 6d. sent from a distance of one hundred and twenty miles.-November 22. This evening I had sent for the Inst.i.tution 1. 4s.--November 23. Today I had 10. sent from Ireland for our Inst.i.tution. Thus the Lord, in answer to prayer, has given me, in a few days, about 50. I had asked only for 40. This has been a great encouragement to me, and has still more stirred me up to think and pray about the establishment of an Orphan-House.--November 25. I have been again much in prayer yesterday and today about the Orphan-House, and am more and more convinced that it is of G.o.d. May He in mercy guide me!
The three chief reasons for establishing an Orphan-House are:--1.
That G.o.d may be glorified, should He be pleased to furnish me with the means, in its being seen that it is not a vain thing to trust in Him; and that thus the faith of His children may be strengthened. 2. The spiritual welfare of fatherless and motherless children. 3. Their temporal welfare.
It may be well to enter somewhat more minutely, than my journal does, upon the reasons which led me to establish an Orphan-House. Through my pastoral labours among the saints in Bristol, through my considerable correspondence, and through brethren who visited Bristol; I had constantly cases brought before me, which proved, that one of the especial things which the children of G.o.d needed in our day, was, to have their faith strengthened. For instance: I might visit a brother, who worked fourteen or even sixteen hours a day at his trade, the necessary result of which was, that not only his body suffered, but his soul was lean, and he had no enjoyment in the things of G.o.d. Under such circ.u.mstances I might point out to him that he ought to work less, in order that his bodily health might not suffer, and that he might gather strength for his inner man, by reading the word of G.o.d, by meditation over it, and by prayer. The reply, however, I generally found to be something like this: "But if I work less, I do not earn enough for the support of my family. Even now, whilst I work so much, I have scarcely enough. The wages are so low, that I must work hard in order to obtain what I need. There was no trust in G.o.d. No real belief in the truth of that word: "Seek ye first the kingdom of G.o.d, and His righteousness: and all these things shall be added unto you."
I might reply something like this: "My dear brother, it is not your work which supports your family, but the Lord; and He who has fed you and your family when you could not work at all, on account of illness, would surely provide for you and yours, if for the sake of obtaining food for your inner man, you were to work only for so many hours a day, as would allow you proper time for retirement. And is it not the case now, that you begin the work of the day after having had only a few hurried moments for prayer; and when you leave off your work in the evening, and mean then to read a little of the word of G.o.d, are you not too much worn out in body and mind, to enjoy it, and do you not often fall asleep whilst reading the Scriptures, or whilst on your knees in prayer?" The brother would allow it was so; he would allow that my advice was good; but still I read in his countenance, even if he should not have actually said so, "How should I get on, if I were to carry out your advice?" I longed, therefore, to have something to point the brother to, as a visible proof, that our G.o.d and Father is the same faithful G.o.d as ever He was; as willing as ever to PROVE Himself to be the LIVING G.o.d, in our day as formerly, to all who put their trust in Him.--Again, sometimes I found children of G.o.d tried in mind by the prospect of old age, when they might be unable to work any longer, and therefore were hara.s.sed by the fear of having to go into the poor-house. If in such a case I pointed out to them, how their Heavenly Father has always helped those who put their trust in Him, they might not, perhaps, always say, that times have changed; but yet it was evident enough, that G.o.d was not looked upon by them as the LIVING G.o.d. My spirit was ofttimes bowed down by this, and I longed to set something before the children of G.o.d, whereby they might see, that He does not forsake, even in our day, those who rely upon him.--Another cla.s.s of persons were brethren in business, who suffered in their souls, and brought guilt on their consciences, by carrying on their business, almost in the same way, as unconverted persons do. The compet.i.tion in trade, the bad times, the over-peopled country, were given as reasons why, If the business were carried on simply according to the word of G.o.d, it could not be expected to do well. Such a brother, perhaps, would express the wish, that he might be differently situated; but very rarely did I see, that there was a stand made for G.o.d, that there was the holy determination to trust in the living G.o.d, and to depend on Him, in order that a good conscience might be maintained. To this cla.s.s likewise I desired to show, by a visible proof, that G.o.d is unchangeably the same.--Then there was another cla.s.s of persons, individuals who were in professions in which they could not continue with a good conscience, or persons who were in an unscriptural position with reference to spiritual things; but both cla.s.ses feared, on account of the consequences, to give up the profession in which they could not abide with G.o.d, or to leave their position, lest they should be thrown out of employment. My spirit longed to be instrumental in strengthening their faith, by giving them not only instances from the word of G.o.d, of His willingness and ability to help all those who rely upon Him, but to show them by proofs, that He is the same in our day. I well knew that the word of G.o.d ought to be enough, and it was, by grace, enough to me; but still, I considered that I aught to lend a helping hand to my brethren, if by any means, by this visible proof to the unchangeable faithfulness of the Lord I might strengthen their hands in G.o.d; for I remembered what a great blessing my own soul had received through the Lord"s dealings with His servant A. H. Franke, who, in dependence upon the living G.o.d alone, established an immense Orphan-House, which I had seen many times with my own eyes. I, therefore, judged myself bound to be the servant of the Church of Christ, in the particular point on which I had obtained mercy: namely, in being able to take G.o.d by His word and to rely upon it. All these exercises of my soul, which resulted from the fact that so many believers, with whom I became acquainted, were hara.s.sed and distressed in mind, or brought guilt on their consciences, on account of not trusting in the Lord; were used by G.o.d to awaken in my heart the desire of setting before the church at large, and before the world, a proof that He has not in the least changed; and this seemed to me best done, by the establishing of an Orphan-House. It needed to be something which could be seen, even by the natural eye. Now, if I, a poor man, simply by prayer and faith, obtained, without asking any individual, the means for establishing and carrying on an Orphan-House: there would be something which with the Lord"s blessing, might be instrumental in strengthening the faith of the children of G.o.d besides being a testimony to the consciences of the unconverted, of the reality of the things of G.o.d. This, then, was the primary reason, for establishing the Orphan-House. I certainly did from my heart desire to be used by G.o.d to benefit the bodies of poor children, bereaved of both parents, and seek, in other respects, with the help of G.o.d, to do them good for this life;--I also particularly longed to be used by G.o.d in getting the dear orphans trained up in the fear of G.o.d;--but still, the first and primary object of the work was, (and still is:) that G.o.d might be magnified by the fact, that the orphans under my care are provided, with all they need, only by prayer and faith, without any one being asked by me or my fellow-labourers, whereby it may be seen, that G.o.d is FAITHFUL STILL, and HEARS PRAYER STILL. That I was not mistaken, has been abundantly proved singe November, 1835, both by the conversion of many sinners who have read the accounts, which have been published in connexion with this work, and also by the abundance of fruit that has followed in the hearts of the saints, for which, from my inmost soul, I desire to be grateful to G.o.d, and the honour and glory of which not only is due to Him alone, but which I, by His help, am enabled to ascribe to Him.
November 28. I have been, every day this week, very much in prayer concerning the Orphan-House, chiefly entreating the Lord to take away every thought concerning it out of my mind, if the matter be not of Him; and have also repeatedly examined my heart concerning my motives in the matter. But I have been more and more confirmed that it is of G.o.d.
December 2. I have again these last days prayed much about the Orphan-House, and have frequently examined my heart, that if it were at all my desire to establish it for the sake of gratifying myself I might find it out. To that end I have also conversed with brother Craik about it, that he might be instrumental in showing me any hidden corruption of my heart concerning the matter, or any other scriptural reason against my engaging in it. The one only reason which ever made me at all doubt as to its being of G.o.d, that I should engage in this work, is, the multiplicity of engagements which I have already. But that which has overbalanced this objection in my mind has been:--1. That the matter is of such great importance. 2. That if the matter be of G.o.d, He will in due time send suitable individuals, so that comparatively little of my time will be taken up in this service.
This morning I asked the Lord especially, that He would be pleased to teach me through the instrumentality of brother C.; and I went to him, that he might have an opportunity of probing my heart. For as I desire only the Lord"s glory, I should be glad to be instructed through the instrumentality of any brother, if the matter be not of Him. But brother C., on the contrary, greatly encouraged me in it. Therefore I have this day taken the first actual step in the matter, in having ordered bills to be printed, announcing a public meeting on December 9th, at which I intend to lay before the brethren my thoughts concerning the Orphan-House, as a means of ascertaining more clearly the Lord"s mind concerning the matter.
December 4. Brother Craik told me this morning, that his voice is getting a little better. December 5. This evening I was struck, in reading the Scriptures, with these words: "Open thy mouth wide, and I will fill it."
Ps. lx.x.xi. 10. Up to this day I had not prayed at all concerning the means or individuals needed for the Orphan-House. I was now led to apply this scripture to the Orphan-House, and asked the Lord for premises, 1000l., and suitable individuals to take care of the children. December 7. Today I received the first shilling for the Orphan-House. Afterwards I received another shilling from a German brother.
December 9. This afternoon the first piece of furniture was given--a large wardrobe. This afternoon and evening I was low in spirit as it regards the Orphan-House, but as soon as I began to speak at the meeting, I received peculiar a.s.sistance from G.o.d, felt great peace and joy, and the a.s.surance that the work is of G.o.d. After the meeting, 10s. was given to me. There was purposely no collection, nor did any one speak besides myself; for it was not in the least intended to work upon the feelings, for I sought to be quite sure concerning the mind of G.o.d. After the meeting a sister offered herself for the work. I went home happy in the Lord, and full of confidence that the matter will come to pa.s.s, though but 10s. has been given. December 10. This morning I have sent to the press a statement which contains the substance of what I said at the meeting last evening.
[For the sake of those who have not read it before, it is given here.]
Proposal for the Establishment of an Orphan-House in connexion with the Scriptural Knowledge Inst.i.tution for Home and Abroad.
Since the last Report of the operations of the Scriptural Knowledge Inst.i.tution for home and abroad was published, the Lord has sent us, in answer to prayer, brother John C-r, formerly a minister of the establishment, as a city missionary, who goes from house to house, among the poor of this city, to converse with them about the things of G.o.d, to circulate the Scriptures among them, to get them to come to the adult school, if they cannot read, and to advise them to put their children to our schools, provided they go to no other. It was particularly gracious of the Lord to send this brother, nearly five months ago, as my brother and fellow labourer, Henry Craik, has been for these eight months laid aside from the ministry of the Word on account of bodily infirmity, and has therefore been unable to take an active part in this Inst.i.tution. Thus I have not only found great help, but I have been greatly encouraged to enlarge the field. That to which my mind has been particularly directed, is, to establish an Orphan-House in which dest.i.tute fatherless and motherless children may be provided with food and raiment, and scriptural education. Concerning this intended Orphan-House I would say
1. It is intended to be in connexion with the Scriptural Knowledge Inst.i.tution for home and abroad, in so far as it respects the Reports, accounts, superintendence, and the principles on which it is conducted, so that, in one sense, it may be considered as a new object of the Inst.i.tution, yet with this difference, that only those funds shall be applied to the Orphan-House which are expressly given for it. If, therefore, any believer should prefer to support either those objects which have been hitherto a.s.sisted by the funds of this Inst.i.tution, or the intended Orphan-House, it need only be mentioned, in order that the money may be applied accordingly.
2. It will only be established if the Lord should provide both the means for it, and suitable persons to conduct it.
As to the means, I would make the following remarks. The reason for proposing to enlarge the field, is not because we have of late particularly abounded in means; for we have been rather straitened. The many gracious answers, however, which the Lord had given us concerning this Inst.i.tution, led brother C-r and me to give ourselves to prayer, asking him to supply us with the means to carry on the work, as we consider it unscriptural to contract debts. During five days, we prayed several times, both unitedly and separately. After that time, the Lord began to answer our prayers, so that, within a few days, about 50l. was given to us. I would further say, that the very gracious and tender dealings of G.o.d with me, in having supplied, in answer to prayer, for the last five years, my own temporal wants without any certain income, so that money, provisions and clothes have been sent to me at times when I was greatly straitened, and that not only in small but large quant.i.ties; and not merely from individuals living in the same place with me, but at a considerable distance; and that not merely from intimate friends, but from individuals whom I have never seen: all this, I say, has often led me to think, even as long as four years ago, that the Lord had not given me this simple reliance on Him merely for myself; but also for others. Often, when I saw poor neglected children running about the streets at Teignmouth, I said to myself: "May it not be the will of G.o.d, that I should establish schools for these children, asking Him to give me the means?" However, it remained only a thought in my mind for two or three years. About two years and six months since I was particularly stirred up afresh to do something for dest.i.tute children, by seeing so many of them begging in the streets of Bristol, and coming to our door. It was not, then, left undone on account of want of trust in the Lord, but through an abundance of other things calling for all the time and strength of my brother Craik and myself; for the Lord had both given faith, and had also shown by the following instance, in addition to very many others, both what He can and what He will do. One morning, whilst sitting in my room, I thought about the distress of certain brethren, and said thus to myself:--"O that it might please the Lord to give me the means to help these poor brethren!"
About an hour afterwards I had 60l. sent as a present for myself, from a brother, whom up to this day I have never seen, and who was then, and is still, residing several thousand miles from this. Should not such an experience, together with promises like that one in John xiv. 13, 14, encourage us to ask with all boldness, for ourselves and others, both temporal and spiritual blessings? The Lord, for I cannot but think it was He, again and again, brought the thought about these poor children to my mind, till at last it ended in the establishment of "The Scriptural Knowledge Inst.i.tution, for Home and Abroad;" since the establishment of which, I have had it in a similar way brought to my mind, first about fourteen months ago, and repeatedly since, but especially during these last weeks, to establish an Orphan-House. My frequent prayer of late has been, that if it be of G.o.d, He would let it come to pa.s.s; if not, that He would take from me all thoughts about it. The latter has not been the case, but I have been led more and more to think that the matter may be of Him. Now, if so, He can influence His people in any part of the world, (for I do not look to Bristol, nor even to England, but to the living G.o.d, whose is the gold and the silver,) to intrust me and brother C-r, whom the Lord has made willing to help me in this work, with the means. Till we have them, we can do nothing in the way of renting a house, furnishing it, &c. Yet, when once as much as is needed for this has been sent us, as also proper persons to engage in the work, we do not think it needful to wait till we have the Orphan-House endowed, or a number of yearly subscribers for it; but we trust to be enabled by the Lord, who has taught us to ask for our daily bread, to look to Him for the supply of the daily wants of those children whom He may be pleased to put under our care. Any donations will be received at my house. Should any believers have tables, chairs, bedsteads, bedding, earthenware, or any kind of household furniture to spare, for the furnishing of the house; or remnants or pieces of calico, linen, flannel, cloth, or any materials useful for wearing apparel; or clothes already worn; they will be thankfully received.
Respecting the persons who are needed for carrying on the work, a matter of no less importance than the procuring of funds, I would observe, that we look for them to G.o.d Himself, as well as for the funds; and that all who may be engaged as masters, matrons, and a.s.sistants, according to the smallness or largeness of the Inst.i.tution, must be known to us as true believers; and moreover, as far as we may be able to judge, must likewise be qualified for the work.
3. At present nothing can be said as to the time when the operations are likely to commence; nor whether the Inst.i.tution will embrace children of both s.e.xes, or be restricted either to boys or girls exclusively; nor of what age they will be received, and how long they may continue in it; for though we have thought about these things, yet we would rather be guided in these particulars by the amount of the means which the Lord may put into our hands, and by the number of the individuals whom he may provide for conducting the Inst.i.tution. Should the Lord condescend to use us as instruments, a short printed statement will be issued as soon as something more definite can be said.
4. It has appeared well to us to receive only such dest.i.tute children as have been bereaved of both parents.
5. The children are intended, if girls, to be brought up for service; if boys, for a trade; and therefore they will be employed, according to their ability and bodily strength, in useful occupations, and thus help to maintain themselves; besides this they are intended to receive a plain education; but the chief and especial end of the Inst.i.tution will be to seek, with G.o.d"s blessing, to bring them to the knowledge of Jesus Christ, by instructing them in the Scriptures.
GEORGE MULLER.
Bristol, Dec. 10th, 1835.
December 11. I have been enabled to pray all this week with increased confidence concerning the Orphan-House, as it regards means, a house, suitable individuals to take care of the children, furniture, &c. December 16. Brother C-n, whom the Lord has kindly allowed to stay above two months among us, to supply brother Craik"s lack of service, left us today. How very gracious has the Lord been to us in this affliction! Many brethren have been sent to us as helpers for a little while--brother C-t for the greater part of the time, and brother C-n for more than two months. And, in addition to this, when brother Craik and I were both ill, the brethren were kept in peace, and there was a spirit of prayer among them. December 31. This evening we had an especial meeting for prayer and praise. We continued together from seven till after twelve.
There have been received into the church at Gideon during the past year--29
Ditto, Bethesda--30