"That"ll cost money, mum," observed the housekeeper. "Wouldn"t some o"
them old ones at home be pa.s.sable, if they was made over a bit?"
"The colour would not fit here. No, that would not do. I"ll get some chintz that is dark and bright at once. I have money. Oh, we are going to be rich now, Barker; and you shall not be stinted in your marketing any more. And this is going to be very nice, _inside_."
To the outside Esther could not get accustomed. It gave her a kind of p.r.i.c.k of dismay every time she saw it anew. What would her father say when _he_ saw it? Yet she had done right and wisely; of that she had no doubt at all; it was very unreasonable that, her judgment being satisfied, her feeling should rebel. Yet it did rebel. When did ever one of her family live in such a place before? They had come down surely very far, to make it possible. Only in the matter of money, to be sure; but then, money has to do largely with the outward appearance one makes, and upon the appearance depends much of the effect upon one"s fellow-creatures. The whisper would come back in Esther"s mind: Who will believe you are what you are, if they see you coming out of such a house? And what then? she answered the whisper. If the Lord has given us this place to dwell in, that and all other effects and consequences of it are part of His will in the matter. What if we are to be overlooked and looked down upon? what have I to do with it? what matters it? Let pride be quiet, and faith be very thankful. Here are all my difficulties set aside, and no danger of not paying our debts any more.
She reasoned so, and fought against pride, if pride it were, which took the other side. She _would_ be thankful; and she was. Nevertheless, a comparison would arise now and then with the former times, and with their state at Seaforth; and further back still, with the beauties and glories of the old manor house in England. Sometimes Esther felt a strange wave of regret come over her at the thought of the gay circle of relations she did not know, who were warm in the shelter of prosperity and the cheer of numbers. She knew herself in a better shelter, yes, and in a better cheer; and yet sometimes, as I said, an odd feeling of loss and descent would come over her as she entered Major Street Esther was working hard these days, which no doubt had something to do with this. She rushed from her morning duties to the school; then at three o"clock rushed to Major Street; and from there, when it grew too dark to work, drove home to minister to her father.
Probably her times of discouragement were times when she was a little tired. The thought was very far from her usually. In her healthy and happy youth, busy life, and mental and spiritual growth and thrift, Esther"s wants seemed to be all satisfied; and so long as things ran their ordinary course, she felt no deficiency. But there are conditions in which one is warm so long as one does not move, while the first stir of change brings a chill over one. And so sometimes now, as Esther entered Major Street or set her face towards it, she would think of her far-off circle of Gainsborough cousins, with a half wish that her father could have borne with them a little more patiently; and once or twice the thought came too, that the Dallases never let themselves be heard from any more. Not even Pitt. She would not have thought it of him, but he was away in a foreign country, and it must be that he had forgotten them. His father and mother were near, and could not forget; was not the old house there before them always to remind them? But they were rich and prosperous and abounding in everything; they had no need of the lonely two who had gone out of their sight and who did need them. It was the way of the world; so the world said. Esther wondered if that were really true, and also wondered now and then if Major Street were to be henceforth not only the sphere but the limit of her existence. She never gave such thoughts harbour; they came and they went; and she remained the cheerful, brave, busy girl she had long been.
The small house at last looked homelike. On the front room Esther had put a warm, dark-looking carpet; the chintz curtains were up and in harmony with the carpet; and the colonel"s lounge was new covered with the same stuff. The old furniture had been arranged so as to give that pleasant cosy air to the room which is such a welcome to the person entering it, making the impression of comfort and good taste and of the habit of good living; not good living in matters of the table, but in those other matters which concern the mind"s nourishment and social well-being. Everything was right and in order, and Esther surveyed her work with much content.
"It looks _very_ nice," she said to her good friend the housekeeper.
"It do, mum," Mrs. Barker answered, with a reservation. "But I"m thinkin", Miss Esther, I can"t stop thinkin", whatever"ll the colonel say when he sees the outside."
"He shall see the inside first. I have arranged that. And, Barker, we must have a capital supper ready for him. We can afford it now. Have a pheasant, Barker; there is nothing he likes better; and some of that beautiful honey Mrs. Bounder has brought us; I never saw such rich honey, I think. And I have good hope papa will be pleased, and put up with things, as I do."
"Your papa remembers Gainsborough Manor, mum, and that"s what you don"t."
"What then! Mrs. Barker, do you really think the Lord does _not_ know what is good for us? That is sheer unbelief. Take what He gives, and be thankful. Barker, why do you suppose the angels came to the sepulchre so, as they did the morning of the resurrection?"
"Mum!" said Mrs. Barker, quite taken aback by this sudden change of subject. But Esther went on in a pleasant, pleased tone of interest.
"I was reading the last chapter of Matthew this morning, and it set me to thinking. You know a number of them, the angels, came, and were seen about the sepulchre; and I suppose there was just a crowd of them coming and going that morning. What for, do you suppose?"
"Miss Esther!" said the housekeeper open-mouthed, "I"m sure I can"t say."
"Why, they came _to see the place_, Barker; just for that. They knew what had been done, and they just came in crowds, as soon as Jesus had left the sepulchre--perhaps before--to look at the spot where that wonder of all wonders had been. But it never occurred to me before how like it was to the way we human creatures feel and do. _That_ was what they came for; and don"t you remember what one of them, with his lightning face and his robes of whiteness, sitting on the stone, said to the women? He told them to do what he had been doing. "_Come see the place_." It brought the angels nearer to me than ever they had seemed to be before."
Mrs. Barker stood there spellbound, silenced. To be sure, if Miss Esther"s head was so busy with the angels, she was in a sort lifted up above the small matters or accidents of common earthly life. And as much as the words the girl"s face awed her too, its expression was so consonant with them.
"Now, Barker, Christopher may bring up some coal and make a fire before he drives back for papa. In both rooms, Barker. And-- Hark! what is that?"
A long-drawn, musical cry was sounding a little distance off, slowly coming nearer as it was repeated. A cry that New York never hears now, but that used to come through the streets in the evening with a sonorous, half melancholy intonation, pleasant to hear.
"Oys----ters!----Oys----ters! Here"s your fresh oys----ters!"
"That"s just what we want, Barker. Get Christopher to stop the man."
Esther had arranged that her father"s room and belongings at home should not be disturbed until the very day when he himself should make the transfer from the one house to the other. So until that morning even the colonel"s sofa had not been moved. Now it was brought over and placed in position between the fireplace and the window, where the occupant would have plenty of light and warmth. The new chintz cover had been put on it; the table was placed properly, and the books which the colonel liked to have at hand lay in their usual position. In the back room the table was set for supper. The rooms communicated, though indeed not by folding doors; still the eye could go through and catch the glow of the fire, and see the neat green drugget on the floor and the pleasant array on the supper table.
"It looks _very_ nice, Barker!" Esther could not help saying again.
"It certainly do, mum," was the answer, in which, nevertheless, Esther heard the aforementioned mental reservation. If her father liked it!
Yes, that could not be known till he came; and she drew a breath of patient anxiety. It was too dark for him to take the effect of anything outside; she had arranged that. One thing at a time, she thought. The house to-day; Major Street to-morrow.
She met him in the hall when he came, giving him a kiss and a welcome; helped him to take off his greatcoat, and conducted him into the small apartment so carefully made ready for him. It offered as much tasteful comfort as it was possible for a room of its inches to do. Esther waited anxiously for the effect. The colonel warmed his hands at the blaze, and took his seat on the sofa, eyeing things suspiciously.
"What sort of a place is this we have come to?" were his first words.
"Don"t you think it is a comfortable place, papa? This chimney draws beautifully, and the coal is excellent. It is really a very nice little house, papa. I think it will be comfortable."
"Not very large," said the colonel, taking with his eye the measure of the room.
"No, papa; and none the worse for that. Room enough for you, and room enough for me; and quite room enough for Barker, who has to take care of it all. I like the house very much."
"What sort of a street is it?"
Must that question come up to-night! Esther hesitated.
"I thought, sir, the street was of less importance to us than the home.
It is _very_ comfortable; and the rent is so moderate that we can pay our way and be at ease. Papa, I would not like the finest house in the world, if I had to run in debt to live in it."
"What is the name of the street?"
"Major Street"
"Whereabouts is it? In the darkness I could not see where we were going."
"Papa, it is in the east part of the city, not very far from the river.
Fulton Market is not very far off either, which is convenient."
"Who lives here?" asked the colonel, with a gathering frown on his brow.
"I know none of the people; nor even their names."
"Of course not! but you know, I suppose, what sort of people they are?"
"They are plain people, papa; they are not of our cla.s.s. They seem to be decent people."
"Decent? What do you mean by decent?"
"Papa, I mean not disorderly people; not disreputable. And is not that enough for us, papa? Oh, papa, does it matter what the people are, so long as our house is nice and pretty and warm, and the low rent just relieves us from all our difficulties? Papa, do be pleased with it! I think it is the very best thing we could have done."
"Esther, there are certain things that one owes to oneself."
"Yes, sir; but must we not pay our debts to other people first?"
"Debts? We were not in debt to anybody!"
"Yes, papa, to more than one; and I saw no way out of the difficulty till I heard of this house. And I am so relieved now--you cannot think with what a relief;--if only _you_ are pleased, dear papa."
He must know so much of the truth, Esther said to herself with rapid calculation. The colonel did not look pleased, it must be confessed.
All the prettiness and pleasantness on which Esther had counted to produce a favourable impression seemed to fail of its effect; indeed, seemed not to be seen. The colonel leaned his head on his hand and uttered something very like a groan.
"So this is what we have come to!" he said. "You do not know what you have done, Esther."
Esther said nothing to that. Her throat seemed to be choked. She looked at her beautiful little fire, and had some trouble to keep tears from starting.