A Safety Match

Chapter 29

He reached out deliberately for her hand, and continued his contemplation of the fire.

"Go on," he said.

Daphne, foolishly uplifted, continued--

"I used to think you rough and hard and unsympathetic. I began to prefer the men who buzzed round and murmured things in my ear. And when people began to pity me as a neglected wife, I--I encouraged them. I let women say catty things about you, and I let men make love to me. That sort of thing has been going on ever since the time"--Daphne"s grip of her husband"s hand tightened--"when you and I decided--to go our own ways. I don"t mind telling you now that it was a pill for me, Jack. My pride----"

"It was a brutal act on my part," blazed out Juggernaut with sudden pa.s.sion.



"No it _wasn"t_: it was what I deserved!" insisted Daphne, whose nature did not permit her to be repentant by halves. "Well, anyhow, I determined to flirt in real earnest now. So I began to carry on in an experimental fashion. But I can"t say it was much fun. Finally I did fall in love with a man, in a sort of way--don"t hurt my hand, dear; it was only in a sort of way--and I let him see it. Well, I got a facer over _him_. One night, under the moon, I tried to flirt with him; and he--well, Jack, he fairly put me in my place!"

"What did he do?"

"He made me feel ashamed of myself."

"What did he say?"

"Not much that we need talk of now, except one thing."

"What was that?"

"He told me to go back to you."

"Why?"

"Because he said"--Daphne"s voice dropped low--"that you loved me."

There was a long silence, until a live coal subsided in the grate.

Then Juggernaut said--

"It was Carthew, I suppose."

Daphne nodded.

"Jack," she said, "Jim Carthew is the best friend that you and I possess."

"I know it."

They were silent again, until irrelevant Daphne enquired suddenly--

"Jack, what made you do that unpractical thing? The tea and sugar, I mean. It was only prolonging the strike: even _I_ can see that."

"It didn"t prolong the strike to any particular extent," said Juggernaut with decision. "Not that I care," he added with unusual inconsequence, "if it did. It made things no easier for the men; and it is with the men that the decision lies in cases of this kind."

"But it was so _unlike_ you," persisted Daphne.

Her husband turned and regarded her quizzically.

"Was it?" he said, smiling. "We all have our weaknesses," he added.

"Mine are women and children. I think," he went on with great deliberation, "that there is only one woman in this wide world who has ever suffered ill at my hands."

"And she is----"

"My wife! Listen," he continued rapidly, "while I make confession. You have spoken your piece bravely, Daphne. Now hear me mine."

He rose in his turn, and stood before his wife.

"I never knew or cared very much about women," he said. "I do not remember my mother, and I had no sisters, which probably accounts for a good deal. Also, I was brought up by a man among men, and I learned to read men and handle men to the exclusion of all else. I was given to understand that women did not matter. I was trained to regard them as a sort of inferior and unreliable variety of the male s.e.x. So I confined my dealings to men, and I found so much joy in handling and mastering men that my eyes became closed to the fact that life could offer me anything else."

"But didn"t you miss female society? Most men can"t get on without _some_," said experienced Daphne.

"You can"t miss what you have never had, little girl. Perhaps if I had encountered female society early in life----"

"But didn"t you sometimes instinctively long for a woman to come and take charge of you? Most men are so helpless and messy by themselves."

"Sometimes," admitted Juggernaut almost reluctantly, "I did. But I put the notion from me."

"Shall I tell you why?" said Daphne quietly.

"I suppose it was because I didn"t want to yield to a weakness."

"It was nothing of the kind," said Daphne with immense decision. "It was because you were _afraid_!"

"Afraid?"

"Yes--afraid! You would have nothing to do with women, because you told yourself you despised them. We were a waste of time, you said--an enc.u.mbrance! The real reason was that you feared us. Yes--feared!

Success was the breath of life to you. You had always had your own way wherever you went. You were the great Sir John Carr--the strong man--Juggernaut! You had never been beaten. Why? Because you had never had the pluck to try conclusions with a woman. Your excuse was that you were a woman-hater, when all the time you were a woman-lover. You have just admitted it, impostor! You were afraid that where every man had failed to turn you from your own hard selfish way of life, a woman might succeed. And so you ran away, and you have been running ever since. There, my strong man, there"s the truth for you!"

For once in his life Sir John Carr, the terror of deputations, the scourge of unsound logicians, the respectfully avoided of hecklers, had no answer ready. The reason was obvious: no answer was possible.

The victory lay with Daphne. She leaned back in the settle and looked fearlessly up into her husband"s face. For the first time in her life she felt maternal towards this man--twenty-two years her senior--just as old Mrs Carfrae had predicted. She was utterly and absolutely happy, too, for she had just realised that she and her husband had come together at last. They were one flesh. The time for tactful diplomacy and mutual accommodation and making allowances was over-past. No need now to guard the flame from sudden gusts and cross-winds. The candle was safely lighted, and, please G.o.d, it should burn steadily to its socket. The Safety Match had accomplished its task after all.

Then she gave a happy little sigh, for her husband"s great arm was around her shoulders.

"All my life, Daphne," said his deep voice, "I have thought that the sweetest thing in this world was victory. Now I have just received my first defeat--you routed me, hip and thigh--and I am happier than I have ever been. Why?"

"Think!" commanded a m.u.f.fled voice in the neighbourhood of his waistcoat.

Juggernaut obeyed. Then he continued, and his grip round Daphne grew stronger--

"I think I see. I married you because I wanted some one to keep my house in order and bear me a son. (That point of view did not endure long, I may say, for I fell in love with you on our honeymoon, and I have loved you ever since; but it was my point of view when I asked you to marry me.) I thought then that it would be a fair bargain if I gave you money and position in return for these things. We could not help living contentedly together, I considered, under the terms of such a logical and business-like contract as that. Well, I did not know then, what I know now, that logic and business are utterly valueless as a foundation for any contract between a man and a woman.

The only thing that is the slightest use for the purpose is the most illogical and unbusiness-like thing in the whole wide world. And"--his iron features relaxed into a smile of rare sweetness--"I believe, I believe, _cara mia_, that you and I have found that thing--together."

His voice dropped lower. "Have we, Daphne--my wife?"

Daphne raised her head, and looked her man full in the face.

"We have found it, O my husband," she said gravely--"at last!"

© 2024 www.topnovel.cc