Mr.Popo is a short plump humanoid Genie with pointy ears, black colored skin and, big red lips with a plain blank stare he was reminiscent of a black face cartoon to the point where he was turned blue in some of his appearances. He does not have any teeth or a nose and is usually always seen smiling. He is always seen wearing a white turban adorned with a blue jewel on his forehead, he has golden hooped earrings on each ear and wears a maroon patterned gold trimmed sleeveless vest as well as golden arm bands on his upper arms. He wears a red sash around his waist with white pants and is also seen sporting a pair of red slippers with white soles. He also is in possession of a magic carpet that lets him travel anywhere in the world instantaneously, he works as the a.s.sistant deity who serves the Earth"s Guardian Kami. Despite his job sounding important he is usually just seen cleaning up around the place and occasionally will train Earthlings to deal with dangerous enemies that threaten the world. Mr.Popo has a deep emotional bond with Kami and will become incredibly depressed or worried if he undergoes any harm luckily for me, Kami also has some complexity to his character, as even though he was the Guardian of Earth he felt undeserving of the t.i.tle. This is because King Piccolo and Piccolo"s existence relied on him being alive, leading him to want to take his own life on several occasions in the series. I could use this to guilt trip him into making him train me, I walked towards Mr.Popo showing no signs of hostility and waved my hand calling out to him as a friendly gesture.Vocado : "Hey um is Kami home? I just want to talk about trai.."
Mr.Popo "Haaai."
Vocado : "uh hi, (cough*) so I was hoping he could trai…"
Mr.Popo : "Byyye."
I was thrown off by his att.i.tude he never acted like this in any of the continuities his presence even felt a little ominous then the expected calm and laid back response I figured he would be. The way he talked wasn"t bad and even came off as friendly but it was his overall vibe and tone that were throwing me off. Before I could even say another word he suddenly started sprinting towards me with his face frozen in a blank smile. That s.h.i.t creeped me right the f.u.c.k out he stared at me, the way a fat kid stares at a twinkie.
Vocado : "No wait hold up! I come in peace! If you get any closer i"m warning you!"
His smile grew wider and a loud crunching and creaking noise could be heard coming from him, it was as if the noise had come from him making the smile grow wider.
Mr.Popo : "I like you."
That last part sent shivers down my spine. Why was he acting like this what"s wrong with him? I started firing my arm blaster and running away to keep some distance between us I absolutely cannot afford to face him in close combat as I never learned how to fight. This body may be stronger than my human counterpart but Mr.Popo is a being who has lived over a thousand years and is an expert martial artist. I ran around the lookout at high speeds firing pot shot"s but he would dodge them effortlessly and continue chasing me getting closer and closer each time. He said in a nonchalant tone
Mr.Popo : "You can run but you can"t hide Maggot."
Vocado : "Eat Laser! a.s.shole!"
I started firing nonstop recklessly out of panic while running until I realized what he just said Maggot!? Wait don"t tell me there is only one continuity where Mr.Popo calls others "Maggot" the Team Four Star / T.F.S continuity. But that"s an abridged series how the f.u.c.k is that even possible!? Then again if I think about it, the fact that I even reincarnated in the world of Dragon Ball is pretty impossible but there"s no way that could be the case Mr.Popo in the T.F.S series is practically a G.o.d and he would have already killed me if he was that version of Mr.Popo. But one thing"s for certain this isn"t the Anime or Manga this continuity is something else entirely. Even though what I just said would prove to be a wrench in my plans for the future as it would make my knowledge of the future worthless I could not help but smile after all what kind of Dragon Ball fan wouldn"t be excited for an all new, all different kind of Dragon Ball adventure. I should find out if Time Patrollers are a thing it would be great if I could travel through Xenoverse and explore other continuities. As I was distracted by my delusions of adventure I hadn"t noticed the ki blast headed straight for me until it was to late!
Vocado : "Holy s.h.i.t!"
It was a direct hit I was blown back into the edge of the lookout almost falling off I got back on my feet panting I managed to block in the nick of time with my arms but they were heavily injured and bleeding luckily the arm blaster was still intact. I was able to endure the pain and ignore it and continued firing after all compared to the pain of drinking the Ultra Divine Water it was nothing. But instead of dodging the blasts he just stood there and with a mocking "aaah" noise he opened his mouth wide and swallowed the blast slurping it up and shooting it back out, but the blast was a lot bigger and had a bluish glow to it I dodged and kept firing but with every shot he spat them back out at me I managed to evade them but the collateral damage from the debris still hit me so I was pretty banged up I had to stop firing. s.h.i.t! This thing is useless!
Mr.Popo : "Your the first challenger i"ve had in centuries. This is exciting if you want to go see Kami you must fight me Mr.Popo."
That"s right I forgot to mention that one of this guys weird habits is referring to himself in the third person I hope that doesn"t get old soon.
Mr.Popo : "And if you win the match you will be able to meet Kami."
Vocado : "So as long as I win the match, I get to meet Kami is that right?"
Mr.Popo : "That"s right Maggot Now prepare to Di...."
Vocado : "Little Green! Get the f.u.c.k up here Right Now!"
I called Little Green using the scouter to message him via the s.p.a.ce pod with the flying nimbus it shouldn"t take long for him to arrive. It was never stated exactly how powerful Mr.Popo was in Dragon Ball but Little Green should be enough to kill him with self destruct after all this Mr.Popo seemed a lot more intense than the one I remember and unlike with Goku he is attacking me with killing intent behind each blast it is better to live and regret than to die and end, even if it changes the the overall story I must survive at all cost!
Mr.Popo: "Little Green?"
I need to buy some time as he began walking slowly towards me, I slowly backed away I knew that shooting him was pointless and my best bet was to use Little Green but I"m not just gonna stand here with my tail in my hand and do nothing! The more desperate my situation the more my saiyan urges flared up the more I wanted to stand my ground and confront him in combat.
Mr.Popo : What"s wrong Maggot. Scared?"
The fat jolly b.a.s.t.a.r.d began giggling with a tyrannical aura surrounding him I felt a genuine sense of fear and regret. I wanted to run away but a part of me was keeping me standing, a part of me was screaming at me to kill and fight I was close to the breaking point. The way he talked just p.i.s.sed me off. It didn"t help being saiyan as I seemed to be especially sensitive to respond with violence I wanted to fight him head on but at my current Power Level it would not work. The more I looked at his stupid smiling face the more angry I got, with every pa.s.sing moment I could feel my pent up anger boil I felt like I would start vomiting blood at how angry I was getting.
Vocado : Yargh! f.u.c.k this! f.u.c.k You! f.u.c.k this Lookout! And f.u.c.k Your Dog s.h.i.t Ability!
I lost control of my anger and charged at him he seemed to smile wider and act like it was nothing which only further infuriated me I swung my small arms repeatedly left and right and tried kicking him but he dodged and blocked everything giggling along the way. I could feel my anger rise to an unnatural degree even in my previous life I had never gotten this angry even when I was run over by a f.u.c.king Truck as my flurry of attacks continued and gained momentum, Mr.Popo was being pushed back and had to step back as I was advancing, deciding that enough was enough Mr.Popo countered with a single punch.
That one punch across my face was enough to bash my brain against my skull and send me flying across the lookout I landed face first on the floor I had the wind knocked out of me and I felt something in my neck break the moment my chin hit the floor I heard a distinct snap noise emanate from my neck. I felt an electric shock course through my body I was paralyzed I couldn"t breathe. I was dizzy and my consciousness was fading slowly.
My scouter had broken from impact so I couldn"t contact Little Green, s.h.i.t where the f.u.c.k is that Green a.s.shole!? I heard a distinct noise come from behind me I couldn"t look back to see what it was but I had already guessed who it could be. Flying on a Nimbus Cloud Little Green appeared.
Little Green: "Giii!"
Vocado : "Took you long enough. You green b.a.s.t.a.r.d..."
Mr:Popo : " Is this that Little Green One you spoke of? He does not appear that impressive, Maggot you better not disappointment Mr.Popo Little Green One. "
My mouth had started oozing out blood I was dying. Little Green noticed this and rushed to my aid, he still had the Senzu bean from when I drank the Ultra Divine Water at Korin"s Tower and fed it to me. When I swallowed the bean all my injuries had healed and I felt stuffed but more importantly I had gotten another Zenkai Boost! I couldn"t tell how much my power had increased because of my broken scouter but I could tell it was substantial I felt at least two times stronger than before. I grabbed Little Green and pulled him closer whispering my plan to him I charged towards Mr.Popo firing my arm blaster and yelled "Now!" As expected he swallowed the blasts and fired them back I dodged as best I could barely avoiding them and continued firing with every explosion I would be hit with some debris and some shards would stab into my body I screamed in pain as I charged to get as much attention possible and distract him to keep him from figuring out my plan Little Green was following behind me taking a good portion of the damage from the debris when I was close enough I braced for impact and intentionally tanked a blast wave to the face while Little Green used my body as a meat shield to get close enough to Mr.Popo. Thanks to my earlier Zenkai Boost I was able tank it, but because It had hit me directly in the face, my face was badly wounded, I was blind from one eye and my hearing was gone It had also left a large scar on my face and burnt off some hair. Nothing a senzu bean can"t fix as soon as I was able, I ate another one and it healed all my wounds all the debris shards stuck in my body fell out. As Little Green jumped out from behind me he latched onto Mr. Popo"s head and exploded before he could finish talking.
Mr.Popo : "You Would Da…" (KABOOM!)
When the dust cleared Mr.Popo was lying on the floor with his eyes wide open blinking stupidly. s.h.i.t! I need to escape this guy"s a monster. He sat up and began laughing I honestly didn"t know how to react because that was either a haha Good Job funny or haha You"re Dead funny. I was getting ready to jump off the ledge with my current power level I might survive but my odds of survival were better jumping than taking my chances with that freak.
Mr.Popo : "Congratulations You Pa.s.s Maggot."
Vocado : "Go f.u.c.k Yourself...."
Mr.Popo : "I have a feeling Mr.Popo and you are going to get along just fine Maggot."
The same creaking and crunching noise could be heard coming from him as his smile grew larger. I couldn"t help but think that apart from the Truck that noise will forever haunt my dreams.
Vocado : "Wheres Kami."
Kami : "Right here, now what business do you have with me?"
I puffed up my chest and with confidence I spoke loudly but respectfully
Vocado : " I would like you to train me and in exchange I can offer you a deal."
Kami : "I don"t deal with humans now get off my Lookout and never return young one."
Vocado : "Wait! The Earth is in danger I could offer you valuable information."
Kami : "Are you death young one leave my Palace immediately! Mr.Popo take care of this "thing" it displeases me."
Mr.Popo : Yes Kami, you heard him Maggot shall I kick you out or will you jump?"
Kami began walking back inside the temple, s.h.i.t! Last chance! It might mess up the future but i"ll be d.a.m.ned if this was all for nothing!
Vocado : "I can help you Defeat King Piccolo if you train me!"
Kami stopped walking and turned back to me he did not open his mouth but instead communicated telepathically, Kami could sense when a person lied in his telepathic communication so I had to be tricky with my answers yet convincing enough to get him to agree . (Kami : "Young one for what purpose did you seek me?") (Vocado: "To get Stronger and protect the people I love!"/ True Meaning : I love only Myself). (Kami: "You are not of this planet why did you come here?"), (Vocado : "we are sent here to conquer planets by an evil tyrant named Frieza he wishes to conquer not only this planet but to destroy mine I need to get stronger before he destroys any more innocent life!" / True Meaning : I need to get stronger to save my own innocent life).
Kami looked satisfied with my answers he cut off the telepathic communication and nodded his head. It looks like it was a success!
Kami : "Mr.Popo it appears I have changed my mind, you will train this young one until you feel he is ready."
Mr.Popo : "Yes Kami Mr.Popo will train this Magg...Young one well."
Kami walked off and I was guided into the room of spirit and time or the Hyperbolic Time Chamber. Mr.Popo explained the mechanics behind the mystical place as well as some lore behind it, which to put it shortly was a place located inside the Lookout where One year inside the chamber an empty dimension is the equivalent to one day on the outside and so my training would finally begin...