"And let this convince you," replied Dorriforth, "that what we teach is truth; for you find you would be deceived did you not trust to persons who know better than yourself. But, my dear Miss Milner, we will talk upon some other topic, and never resume this again--we differ in opinion, I dare say, on one subject only, and this difference I hope will never extend itself to any other. Therefore, let not religion be named between us; for as I have resolved never to persecute you, in pity be grateful, and do not persecute me."
Miss Milner looked with surprise that any thing so lightly said, should be so seriously received. The kind Miss Woodley e.j.a.c.u.l.a.t.ed a short prayer to herself, that heaven would forgive her young friend the involuntary sin of religious ignorance--while Mrs. Horton, unperceived, as she imagined, made the sign of the cross upon her forehead as a guard against the infectious taint of heretical opinions. This pious ceremony Miss Milner by chance observed, and now shewed such an evident propensity to burst into a fit of laughter, that the good lady of the house could no longer contain her resentment, but exclaimed, "G.o.d forgive you," with a severity so different from the idea which the words conveyed, that the object of her anger was, on this, obliged freely to indulge that impulse which she had in vain been struggling to suppress; and no longer suffering under the agony of restraint, she gave way to her humour, and laughed with a liberty so uncontrolled, that soon left her in the room with none but the tender-hearted Miss Woodley a witness of her folly.
"My dear Miss Woodley," (then cried Miss Milner, after recovering herself) "I am afraid you will not forgive me."
"No, indeed I will not," returned Miss Woodley.
But how unimportant, how weak, how ineffectual are _words_ in conversation--looks and manners alone express--for Miss Woodley, with her charitable face and mild accents, saying she would not forgive, implied only forgiveness--while Mrs. Horton, with her enraged voice and aspect, begging heaven to pardon the offender, palpably said, she thought her unworthy of all pardon.
CHAPTER V.
Six weeks have now elapsed since Miss Milner has been in London partaking with delight all its pleasures, while Dorriforth has been sighing with apprehension, attending to her with precaution, and praying with zealous fervour for her safety. Her own and her guardian"s acquaintance, and, added to them, the new friendships (to use the unmeaning language of the world) which she was continually forming, crowded so perpetually to the house, that seldom had Dorriforth even a moment left him from her visits or visitors, to warn her of her danger:--yet when a moment offered, he caught it eagerly--pressed the necessity of "Time not always pa.s.sed in society; of reflection; of reading; of thoughts for a future state; and of virtues acquired to make old age supportable." That forcible power of genuine feeling, which directs the tongue to eloquence, had its effect while she listened to him, and she sometimes put on the looks and gesture of a.s.sent--sometimes even spoke the language of conviction; but this the first call of dissipation would change to ill-timed raillery, or peevish remonstrance, at being limited in delights her birth and fortune ent.i.tled her to enjoy.
Among the many visitors who attended at her levees, and followed her wherever she went, there was one who seemed, even when absent from her, to share her thoughts. This was Lord Frederick Lawnly, the younger son of a Duke, and the avowed favourite of all the most discerning women of taste.
He was not more than twenty-three; animated, elegant, extremely handsome, and possessed of every accomplishment that would captivate a heart less susceptible of love than Miss Milner"s was supposed to be.
With these allurements, no wonder if she took pleasure in his company--no wonder if she took pride in having it known that he was among the number of her devoted admirers. Dorriforth beheld this growing intimacy with alternate pain and pleasure--he wished to see Miss Milner married, to see his charge in the protection of another, rather than of himself; yet under the care of a young n.o.bleman, immersed in all the vices of the town, without one moral excellence, but such as might result eventually from the influence of the moment--under such care he trembled for her happiness--yet trembled more lest her heart should be purloined without even the authority of matrimonial views.
With sentiments like these, Dorriforth could never disguise his uneasiness at the sight of Lord Frederick, nor could the latter help discerning the suspicion of the guardian, and consequently each was embarra.s.sed in the presence of the other. Miss Milner observed, but observed with indifference, the sensations of both--there was but one pa.s.sion which then held a place in her bosom, and that was vanity; vanity defined into all the species of pride, vain-glory, self-approbation--an inordinate desire of admiration, and an immoderate enjoyment of the art of pleasing, for her own individual happiness, and not for the happiness of others. Still had she a heart inclined, and oftentimes affected by tendencies less unworthy; but those approaches to what was estimable, were in their first impulse too frequently met and intercepted by some darling folly.
Miss Woodley (who could easily discover a virtue, although of the most diminutive kind, and scarce through the magnifying gla.s.s of calumny could ever perceive a fault) was Miss Milner"s inseparable companion at home, and her zealous advocate with Dorriforth, whenever, during her absence, she became the subject of discourse. He listened with hope to the praises of her friend, but saw with despair how little they were merited. Sometimes he struggled to subdue his anger, but oftener strove to suppress tears of pity for her hapless state.
By this time all her acquaintance had given Lord Frederick to her as a lover; the servants whispered it, and some of the public prints had even fixed the day of marriage;--but as no explanation had taken place on his part, Dorriforth"s uneasiness was increased, and he seriously told his ward, he thought it would be indispensably prudent in her to entreat Lord Frederick to discontinue his visits. She smiled with ridicule at the caution, but finding it repeated, and in a manner that indicated authority, she promised not only to make, but to enforce the request.
The next time he came she did so, a.s.suring him it was by her guardian"s desire; "Who, from motives of delicacy, had permitted her to solicit as a favour, what he could himself make a demand." Lord Frederick reddened with anger--he loved Miss Milner; but he doubted whether, from the frequent proofs he had experienced of his own inconstancy, he should continue to love--and this interference of her guardian threatened an explanation or a dismission, before he became thoroughly acquainted with his own heart.--Alarmed, confounded, and provoked, he replied,
"By heaven, I believe Mr. Dorriforth loves you himself, and it is jealousy that makes him treat me in this manner."
"For shame, my Lord!" cried Miss Woodley, who was present, and who trembled with horror at the sacrilegious idea.
"Nay, shame to him if he is not in love"--answered his Lordship, "for who but a savage could behold beauty like her"s without owning its power?"
"Habit," replied Miss Milner, "is every thing--Mr. Dorriforth sees and converses with beauty, but from habit he does not fall in love; as you, my Lord, from habit, so often do."
"Then you believe that love is not in my nature?"
"No more of it, my Lord, than habit could very soon extinguish."
"But I would not have it extinguished--I would rather it should mount to a flame, for I think it a crime to be insensible of the divine blessings love can bestow."
"Then you indulge the pa.s.sion to avoid a sin?--this very motive deters Mr. Dorriforth from that indulgence."
"It ought to deter him, for the sake of his oaths--but monastick vows, like those of marriage, were made to be broken--and surely when your guardian looks at you, his wishes"----
"Are never less pure," she replied eagerly, "than those which dwell in the bosom of my _celestial_ guardian."
At that instant Dorriforth entered the room. The colour had mounted into Miss Milner"s face from the warmth with which she had delivered her opinion, and his accidental entrance at the very moment this praise had been conferred upon him in his absence, heightened the blush to a deep glow on every feature--confusion and earnestness caused even her lips to tremble and her whole frame to shake.
"What"s the matter?" cried Dorriforth, looking with concern on her discomposure.
"A compliment paid by herself to you, Sir," replied Lord Frederick, "has affected your ward in the manner you have seen."
"As if she blushed at the untruth," said Dorriforth.
"Nay, that is unkind," cried Miss Woodley; "for if you had been here"----
"--I would not have said what I did," replied Miss Milner, "but left him to vindicate himself."
"Is it possible that I can want any vindication? Who would think it worth their while to slander so unimportant a person as I am?"
"The man who has the charge of Miss Milner," replied Lord Frederick, "derives a consequence from her."
"No ill consequence, I hope, my Lord?" said Dorriforth, with a firmness in his voice, and with an eye so fixed, that his antagonist hesitated for a moment in want of a reply--and Miss Milner softly whispering to him, as her guardian turned his head, to avoid an argument, he bowed acquiescence. And then, as if in compliment to her, he changed the subject;--with an air of ridicule he cried,
"I wish, Mr. Dorriforth, you would give me absolution of all my sins, for I confess they are many, and manifold."
"Hold, my Lord," exclaimed Dorriforth, "do not confess before the ladies, lest, in order to excite their compa.s.sion, you should be tempted to accuse yourself of sins you have never yet committed."
At this Miss Milner laughed, seemingly so well pleased, that Lord Frederick, with a sarcastic sneer, repeated,
"From Abelard it came, And Eloisa still must love the name."
Whether from an inattention to the quotation, or from a consciousness it was wholly inapplicable, Dorriforth heard it without one emotion of shame or of anger--while Miss Milner seemed shocked at the implication; her pleasantry was immediately suppressed, and she threw open the sash and held her head out at the window, to conceal the embarra.s.sment these lines had occasioned.
The Earl of Elmwood was at that juncture announced--a Catholic n.o.bleman, just come of age, and on the eve of marriage. His visit was to his cousin, Mr. Dorriforth, but as all ceremonious visits were alike received by Dorriforth, Miss Milner, and Mrs. Horton"s family, in one common apartment, Lord Elmwood was ushered into this, and of course directed the conversation to a different subject.
CHAPTER VI.
With an anxious desire that the affection, or acquaintance, between Lord Frederick and Miss Milner might be finally dissolved, her guardian received with infinite satisfaction, overtures of marriage from Sir Edward Ashton. Sir Edward was not young or handsome; old or ugly; but immensely rich, and possessed of qualities that made him worthy of the happiness to which he aspired. He was the man whom Dorriforth would have chosen before any other for the husband of his ward, and his wishes made him sometimes hope, against his cooler judgment, that Sir Edward would not be rejected--he was resolved, at all events, to try the force of his own power in the strongest recommendation of him.
Notwithstanding that dissimilarity of opinion which, in almost every instance, subsisted between Miss Milner and her guardian, there was in general the most punctilious observance of good manners from each towards the other--on the part of Dorriforth more especially; for his politeness would sometimes appear even like the result of a system which he had marked out for himself, as the only means to keep his ward restrained within the same limitations. Whenever he addressed her there was an unusual reserve upon his countenance, and more than usual gentleness in the tone of his voice; this appeared the effect of sentiments which her birth and situation inspired, joined to a studied mode of respect, best calculated to enforce the same from her. The wished-for consequence was produced--for though there was an instinctive rect.i.tude in the understanding of Miss Milner that would have taught her, without other instruction, what manners to observe towards her deputed father; yet, from some volatile thought, or some quick sense of feeling, which she had not been accustomed to subdue, she was perpetually on the verge of treating him with levity; but he would immediately recall her recollection by a reserve too awful, and a gentleness too sacred for her to violate. The distinction which both required, was thus, by his skilful management alone, preserved.
One morning he took an opportunity, before her and Miss Woodley, to introduce and press the subject of Sir Edward Ashton"s hopes. He first spoke warmly in his praise, then plainly said that he believed she possessed the power of making so deserving a man happy to the summit of his wishes. A laugh of ridicule was the only answer; but a sudden frown from Dorriforth having put an end to it, he resumed his usual politeness, and said,
"I wish you would shew a better taste, than thus pointedly to disapprove of Sir Edward."
"How, Mr. Dorriforth, can you expect me to give proofs of a good taste, when Sir Edward, whom you consider with such high esteem, has given so bad an example of his, in approving me?"
Dorriforth wished not to flatter her by a compliment she seemed to have sought for, and for a moment hesitated what answer to make.
"Reply, Sir, to that question," she said.