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“Are you bored?”
Allen stopped drinking the red wine and turned his head to look at the woman who just spoke. He smiled at her a little and said, “No, I"m fine.”
“Good.” The woman responded. “I think you haven"t eaten anything yet. Marco said you even went undertime on your work just to get here? I bet you"re hungry. There"s a lot of food inside. Come in?” The woman invited.
He shook his head in response, “No. Uhm, I"m good. Thanks.” He said, and then his eyes s.h.i.+fted down onto the baby b.u.mp of the woman.
His lips secretly drew a smile. “C-can I?” He asked.
“Sure.” The woman reached for his hand and placed it on her stomach.
It was an unusual feeling for him at first, but the woman guided his hand as he stroked the b.u.mp and until he felt comfortable doing it.
“D-does it hurt?” He curiously asked.
“Uhm, sometimes, at start, but I can manage. I just tell it not to be so naughty because it hurts mommy, and that"s it.”
Allen couldn"t help but smile, “He hears you?” He couldn"t believe it.
“She.” The woman corrected. “Somehow, yes. I don"t know how that"s possible but I think she hears me because she follows me. We have this mother and daughter connection which only us could understand.” She said, and then laughed.
“Mariel…”
Allen removed his hand from the woman"s stomach when his friend Marco suddenly came. He went near them and embraced the woman from behind. “Get inside. It"s already dark. You might feel cold.”
“Okay.” Mariel responded. “Allen, if you get hungry, there"s food inside, okay? Hon…” The woman turned her gaze to Marco, “Offer him food. He travelled far.”
Marco naughtily laughed and then said, “Oh, you heard my wife. You should eat. Don"t drown yourself with alcohol.”
And then the three of them laughed.
Just after a while, Mariel went inside the house already. Allen and Marco were left standing in the gazebo, watching the other visitors playing in the pool.
Allen attended the baby shower of Marco and Mariel held on their house at Ayala Alabang.
“Let"s take a seat. I get tired of you.” Marco offered.
They headed to the pool lounge chair and sat there.
“Wait, I"ll get some beer. You won"t get drunk with that.” Marco laughed, and then stood up.
“a.s.sh*le. I"m not drinking too much. I still have to drive myself home.” Allen came back at him without turning his head.
He stared at Marco as it went inside the house. Mariel bid him welcome with an embrace on the waist, and then they both went inside.
His lips drew a bitter smile.
Oh, love. Who would"ve thought those two would be that happy? The two got married three years ago, but Mariel got pregnant only now. She was diagnosed with a hormonal disorder months after their wedding. They almost separated because of that. But the good thing was that both of them fought to have their so-called happily ever after.
Then, Allen s.h.i.+fted his eyes onto another direction. He started feeling jealous of the relations.h.i.+p the two have.
If only his marriage worked out and none of them gave up, he would"ve been happy. Why won"t he be? He"s married to the most beautiful, most loving woman in the world. He was just an a.s.sh*le back then that"s why he lost the woman he loved.
He was surprised when his cellphone vibrated. He immediately took it out from his slacks. He thought it was his secretary that texted him as there might be some problem at work, but he was wrong. It"s Leila.
His forehead wrinkled. He wasn"t sure if he wanted to read her message or put it aside. He thought Leila would be saying some nonsense stuff again. She promised to help him with Vanessa, but the past few months, he hasn"t heard from her. He"s not sure what that lady has been busy working on.
But in the end, he still decided to read her message. Maybe that time, she had something important to say.
But, he still hasn"t read the whole message when he locked his cellphone and put it back his pocket. Leila just asked his whereabouts. Yes, just that, and he could only shake his head for that. Yeah, right. So, what should he expect? Some good news about Vanessa? He didn"t get his hopes high.
Yes, he never lost track of his wife. He knew what Vanessa has been busy working on, which countries she"s been going to. Everything. What would his money and connections do?
He hired a man before to help him monitor his wife in London without her knowing. He didn"t want her to feel scared as she might avoid him all the more. That was also what Leila advised him then - to just let Vanessa be and give her a break until she would forget everything that happened.
He"s been to London several times only to check on his wife personally. There"s even this one time when he followed her in a fancy restaurant in the downtown of London about three years ago. She was busy on her laptop while eating. She was in the zone of whatever she was doing that"s why she didn"t notice him.
He didn"t know how exactly to feel that day - should he be happy because Vanessa looked so well, or should he be sad that she seemed to have forgotten about him already? Vanessa hadn"t thought of going back home to the Philippines and there"s not even a call nor an email from her.
Was her hatred toward him that serious that"s why never has she shown a hint of thoughtfulness on him? Or was she only too busy? He hoped it"s the latter; he couldn"t bear the former.
Even if he wanted to, he didn"t go anywhere near her that day. He knew to himself that he still didn"t have the courage to face her. He had to fix himself first. He didn"t want Vanessa to see him like his old self – an a.s.shole, cold, and selfish husband who knew nothing but to hurt and yell at people.
He only stopped checking on his wife when he got busier with work - actually, he became workaholic. His days would only be comprised of meetings, answering emails, and creating presentations.
Sometimes, he would bring his laptop to his condo to continue working on some stuff and he guessed those were his ways to move on little by little. He was also chosen to take charge on the new casino they"re building in Entertainment City.
He barely had time to ask about how Vanessa has been doing. Based on the last news about her, she planned on putting up a business, but she still didn"t know where. It was Leila who told him about this.
“Hey, so how many dreams have you built?”
He came back to his senses after Marco teased him. He lifted his head up and reached for the bottle of alcohol Marco handed him.
“F*cking dreams…” He said, shaking his head. “What took you so long?”
Marco sneered, “Blame her.”
Allen looked at the direction his friend was pointing to. He cursed as he saw the lady coming toward them.
Allen looked at Marco fiercely and snapped, “The h.e.l.l! You invited her?”
He"s talking about Cindy - the lady they met in a bar just recently, who acts like she"s Allen"s girlfriend. Very clingy indeed!
It was too late for Marco to explain and make an excuse as Cindy already reached where they were. She immediately sat on the pool lounge chair beside Allen.
“Hey! I didn"t know you"ll be here, too!” She acted like she was surprised when Allen knew she was only fooling them.
Girls. What could he expect? So, he only shut his eyes hard.
Ugh, for G.o.d"s sake! How come she followed me here? d.a.m.n! And she still has the guts to act like she doesn"t know I"m here. Yeah, right! So, Allen didn"t have any other second thoughts; he stood up immediately and said, “I"ll just use the comfort room.” He told them to avoid Cindy.
Cindy also stood up, “Hey! You didn"t even say hi?” She sounded upset.
Allen peeked at her to say hi, but he changed his mind; he just didn"t feel like doing so. Yes, Cindy"s a beautiful lady, but the way she dressed up was far from being decent. She was wearing a black halter top, red leather shorts which were super short, and a pair of red wedges. Her make-up was also too much, like her lips were oozing red!
Allen thought, who would wear such an outfit in a baby shower? Marco"s and Mariel"s house isn"t a bar. His Vanessa would never dress like that. So he stayed speechless; he just continued leaving his friend and Cindy. He hasn"t gone far when he felt Marco following him.
“Why do you change your mood whenever you see Cindy? She"s a hot lady, isn"t she? And she has a s.e.xy body - huge b.o.o.bs.” His friend teased as they entered the house.
Allen looked at his friend with a wrinkled forehead. He didn"t like Marco a.s.sociating him with that girl. If only he could, he would literally push her away from him!
“That girl? So clingy! She"s very irritating!” He responded in a very irate manner, and then he drank from his bottle of alcohol. “I already told her I"m married and she still won"t stop.”
Marco laughed, “You"re separated anyway.”
“I"m still married in papers. And one more thing, I would never ever entertain a woman like that. She"s nothing compared to Vanessa.” He said with conviction, and then drank more alcohol.
“Still Vanessa, huh? Tss. Okay, if that"s what you want.”
And that"s the last words he heard from Marco after he went inside the comfort room.
Still Vanessa? h.e.l.l, of course! It"s always been her. And it will always be her.
He placed the bottle on the small table, and then he rested his elbows on the sink. d.a.m.n! Now he can"t get Vanessa out of his mind. That Cindy would stop bothering her if only he could let her meet his wife. Sh*t how he misses his wife so much! Four years is too d.a.m.n long and he couldn"t say he has moved on totally.
Until that time, he couldn"t help but feel lonely and incomplete. Never has a day gone by that Vanessa wouldn"t cross his mind. He felt alone. He wanted Vanessa back - Vanessa taking care of him; Vanessa cooking good food for him, especially his favorite Mechado; Vanessa embracing him at night; Vanessa"s angelic face, and even the way she looked at him… Everything.
Months after Vanessa left him, he didn"t know how to start all over again. It felt like he lost a big part of him that he couldn"t continue living. He didn"t feel like going to work, too. He would always go undertime or file leave credits. He thought, what"s the reason he"d still be working? There"s no one he"s supporting anymore.
He also lost his social life. He doesn"t go out with his friends anymore. He also lost interest with dating girls. His friends would always tell him to date just so he could forget and find a motivation to live. But no, he just couldn"t. He only wants Vanessa and he"s only for Vanessa.
He waited and hoped that his wife would come back. But several weeks pa.s.sed, even months, and Vanessa still hadn"t gone home. He couldn"t say that he has already given up; he just realized that life still had to go on and he had to move on.
After quite some time, he decided to leave their old house and get a condo unit in Makati. It was just difficult for him to move forward if he would stay there. That place always reminded him of his wife – how she lit that home up. Also, he thought, if Vanessa would come back, he wouldn"t want her to see him in his lowest state – broken and hopeless. He needed to look well, like he"s worth going back to.
His phone vibrated to a notification which brought him back to his senses. It"s Leila again. What could be her motive this time?
“What do you want?” He greeted her with a bang as he answered the call.
“HEY a.s.sH*LE!”
Sh*t! He angrily moved his phone away from his ears. Was it even right to yell?
“Tsk. Your voice is too loud!"
“I"m sorry! I just got too excited. Where are you right now? You don"t return my messages!”
He didn"t respond right away and got out of the comfort room first. It was a bit hot inside, thinking that he was wearing long-sleeved polo s.h.i.+rt. The exhaust fan might not be working, or was it just turned off?
He peeked at his friend first and saw him in the living room having some alcohol. He was with his wife, Mariel, and some other visitors.
“I"m in Marco"s and Mariel"s baby shower. What"s the matter?” He told Leila.
“Ready my cheque.”
He sneered, “And why?”
“I have some news for you.”
He brushed his hair, “Come on, Leila. Just make sure that"s worth my time.”
“Of course! When did my cousin become worthless for you?”
Allen seemed to have become heedful that he immediately sat on the high stool near him. He slightly covered his mouth so the other visitors pa.s.sing by won"t hear him much.
“W-what about her? H-how is she?” He asked simultaneously as if he couldn"t wait for what Leila had to say.
“Leila?” Allen called after the line seemed to have been broken.
“Yes, I"m here! Wait, I"m cooking!”
“Tsk! What else do you have to say?”
“Well, Allen… Your wife is back.”
Just like that, he ran to the parking lot where his car was. He wasn"t even able to say proper goodbye to Marco and Mariel. He was in much of a hurry!
He was shaking as he turned his car engine on. He didn"t know how to feel - if he should be feeling happy or if he should be feeling nervous. She"s here; she"s back. Would that mean that she will be arranging their annulment? d.a.m.n! It couldn"t happen. He hoped it"s not the reason Vanessa"s back.
It was a good thing, too, that the traffic wasn"t heavy at that time. He arrived early at a seafood restaurant in Greenbelt. Leila told him Vanessa would be there that night.
As he reached the place, he immediately went inside. He didn"t even greet the waitress who welcomed him. His eyes wandered around the place, but there was no Vanessa in there. And so he felt doubtful. Would it be possible that Leila was only fooling him around?
He sat down a two-seater table. He intentionally stayed near the entrance so he could see his wife in case she would arrive. But after almost half an hour, no Vanessa appeared. He couldn"t be at ease; he could only feel so much tension on his palms. He then decided to go to the men"s room. There, he b.u.mped with a child, maybe about four years in age. He seemed having some difficult time in opening up his pants.
Allen sneered. He found the little boy cute as he seemed to be in panic. Just after a while, he helped the child, “Here, let me help you.”
At first, the child seemed to be shy, but after some time, he allowed Allen to help him. The zipper of his pants appeared to be stuck that"s why he couldn"t pull it open.
“Where"s your dad? He should be the one helping you now.” Allen said.
“Uhm… Outside? He"s talking to… Uhm… I don"t know who he"s talking to.”
Allen laughed to how the child responded. He"s full of life and talkative he must say.
“Where"s your mom then? She could accompany you to the ladies room instead.”
“No to ladies room! I"m a big boy! I can pee myself!” The child bragged as he started to pee.
Allen laughed out hard inside. Big boy, eh? He could even lift him up with only one hand!
d.a.m.n, how he wanted a little boy! If only they didn"t lose their child, it could"ve been as lovely as that boy. He"s sure their child would get Vanessa"s sweet and pure heart.
“Finis.h.!.+” The boy exclaimed after he"s done to pee, even had both of his hands raised high up in the air.
“Good. You still need my help?” He asked as the boy might not be able to zipper his pants back up.
“No!” The boy irascibly said as he hurriedly ran outside the comfort room. Does he even know how to say "thank you"? Allen could only shake his head.
After a few seconds, he also went out. He heard the boy talking to somebody outside. He pulled the door of the men"s room and saw him talking to a woman who was on her knees in front of the kid. Maybe she"s his mom.
“Why did you run? Didn"t I tell you to wait for me?” The woman asked.
“It"s okay! A mister helped me!”
“Mister? Who?”
Allen wrinkled his forehead. He was about to peek at the woman the boy was talking to because her voice sounded familiar, but suddenly, the boy turned around, saw him, and pointed at him, “Oh! Him! Mister!” The boy exclaimed.
His eyes bulged after seeing the woman. His heart started to pound fast and hard. G.o.d! He deeply stared at her, like he"s memorizing all the features of her face. He couldn"t believe what he was seeing in front of his own eyes.
Even if he was very much surprised, his face still showed a hint of bliss. It was as if all the aches and pains in his heart were washed away. After four years… He even thought that he still wouldn"t be able to see her that night.
“Vanessa…” He murmured with so much joy in his eyes.
But he was more surprised that Vanessa didn"t have any reaction on her face. She stood up and fixed her peplum skirt, “Oh, it"s you. Small world, eh?” She casually greeted. “I"m sorry we have to go.” She carried the boy in her arms. “Come on, Sage. Your daddy is waiting.” She told the kid, and then walked away.
Allen seemed to be struck dumb. He was knocked down by a feather. He lost the happiness that he felt earlier. He was left standing there, speechless.
Sh*t! Yes, he was expecting Vanessa to treat him coldly after everything that happened. But what was that? That child! The ‘daddy‘ she just mentioned. Don"t tell him… d.a.m.n!
Vanessa was already far from him when he realized he had to move. He almost ran to catch up with his wife. He couldn"t shout to call her because he didn"t want the attention of the people dining in that restaurant.
They were outside the restaurant when Allen was able to reach Vanessa. He immediately went in front of her, “V-van… I… Uhh… C-could we talk? Please.” He haltingly asked.
F*ck! He thought he"d be prepared the moment they would see each other again. But why does he seem to lose everything he has to say?
“I can"t.” Vanessa directly responded without even thinking. “Can"t you see?” She said, as if referring to the child she was carrying.
“Oh! There"s daddy!” Sage excitingly exclaimed.
Allen frowned seeing the child forcibly releasing himself from Vanessa"s arms, and then hurriedly ran toward a man in a business suit. The man happily carried the child in his arms, and then walked to where they were.
“Hey sweetie, why did you go out?” The man curiously asked Vanessa.
Allen clenched his fists. He was hurt of what he just heard. Sweetie? h.e.l.l, what was that?! Who"s this sh*t who had the b.a.l.l.s to call Vanessa ‘sweetie‘? He wanted to puch him hard, but he stopped himself. He just stood there, gritting his teeth. Then, he s.h.i.+fted his eyes to his wife. She still didn"t have any reaction on her face.
“Yes?” The man suddenly asked him. Maybe he noticed that he was standing too close to them, but he didn"t turn to look at him. His eyes stayed lock to Vanessa.
“You know him, Vanessa?” The man asked Vanessa.
Vanessa s.h.i.+fted her gaze at him. Looking at her eyes, the person in front of him seemed to have changed already. He can no longer see those eyes filled with innocence and love. She was cold. He couldn"t help but feel sorrowful inside.
Vanessa breathed deeply. “Yes, I know him. Gavin, this is Allen Fajardo. Allen, this is Gavin.” She introduced them to each other.
The man casually extended his arm to shake his hand; the ‘Allen Fajardo‘ seemed not to ring a bell. Does that mean Vanessa hasn"t even mentioned him before?
“Gavin, could we just eat somewhere else?” Vanessa asked after they shook hands.
“Uhh, why? Don"t you like the menu? I thought you"re craving for seafood?” Gavin asked, confused.
“Let"s just choose another restaurant. I just don"t feel like staying here.”
“Oh, o-okay. Just wait for me in the car. I"ll just get the perfume sample left on the table.”
“No need.” Vanessa stopped him. “Leave it there. I have a lot in the shop. Let"s go.” Vanessa said in a very authoritative voice, and then started walking away.
Gavin submissively followed Vanessa. He just walked after her as he carried Sage in his arms. Vanessa just walked past Allen like he didn"t even exist. She also didn"t say goodbye.
Allen didn"t see this coming. He felt heavy in the heart. How he felt when Vanessa left him all came back.
He slapped the stirring wheel of his car hard and blew its horn twice. Was it even right for this one car to overtake going outside the parking lot? It even took so much time paying the parking fee! He seemed to be having a bad luck that day when he was in a hurry in following his wife and the man she"s with. Oh, life!
He dialled Leila"s number. He"s been trying to contact her, but to no success. In his fifth attempt, Leila still won"t answer. In so much frustration, he hurled his cellphone onto the seat next to him. Sh*t! He could only brush his hair with his fingers.
He wished he was just mistaken; he wished his wife was not officially together with somebody else. And the child… He didn"t know; he couldn"t accept it. He just saw Vanessa with someone else and he"s already hurt so deeply. After 4 years of agony, was that all that he"ll get? He tried to calm himself through stroking his temples.
Impossible. He knows his wife couldn"t do that. He trusts her. He"s sure Vanessa wouldn"t be in another relations.h.i.+p knowing they"re still married. Maybe he"s just really mistaken about what he saw. He will ask Vanessa once there"d be a chance they could talk.
Just after a while, his cellphone rang.
It"s a call back from Leila, and in a blink of an eye, he answered the call. He turned the speakerphone on and hung it on the car phone holder.
“Leila.”
“Oh? Sorry I wasn"t able to get your call. I didn"t hear it. So, did you see her?”
“Sh*t! Yeah. She"s with someone else! You didn"t tell me that. Who"s that guy? And the kid? Why were they together?” He interrogated Leila as he drove along a heavy traffic.
“A guy? I don"t know. What"s the name?”
“Alvin.”
“Alvin?” Leila asked, surprised. It took her time before she could react. “Or Gavin?”
Allen shut his eyes hard for a bit. “Y-yeah, Gavin. You know that guy? Who"s he? You haven"t mentioned him.”
He gripped the stirring wheel hard. If it was a living thing? It might have been dead already. Why haven"t he known of that man, and the child? Was he that occupied with work?
“Calm down, Allen. That"s just the fragrance chemist of your wife. I think he"s courting Vanessa, but Vannie doesn"t entertain him because he has a child.” Leila told him.
“S-so the little boy"s not hers?” His voice sounded hopeful.
“Of course not! Relax! You"re being jealous again. So, what else happened? Did she greet you? What did she say? Oh, hey, I forgot to tell you something.”
“What?” He responded immediately.
“Uhh, I told Vannie you"re dating somebody else already.” Leila confessed, and then laughed hard as if she was teasing Allen.
“FCK, WHAT?!” He shouted in a high-sounding voice. “Leila! You"re not helping! Who am I dating? You know that"s not true! It"s only her that I want!” Then he slapped the stirring wheel in frustration. He was already in the verge of blowing up, but the one she"s in conversation with still had the guts to laugh!
“Sorry! Yes, I know you only want to be with my cousin. I just wanted to see her reaction. It"s for you a.s.shole!”
“d.a.m.n it! You"re really impossible.” He said, and then ended the call. Again, he slapped the stirring wheel of his car. Leila was really a crazy girl!
At last, he had gone past the heavy traffic. He stepped on the gas, and even if he was far, he didn"t remove his eyes on Gavin"s car.
He wouldn"t let his hards.h.i.+p go to waste. He wouldn"t waste this chance. Four years longing for Vanessa was enough. He"ll make a move now – he will fight for her this time. If he needs to fight with that chemist man-to-man, he will. He will do anything just to have his wife back.
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