Frustrated, I hurled my phone back inside my bag before I turned the car engine on. Tsk. d.a.m.n this!
Leila"s being unreliable these past few days. What is she being so busy about? I just want a simple answer from her - I just want to know where Allen lives - but she couldn"t give me direct response. She gave me a vague reply, though, that he stays in Makati, but for G.o.d"s sake! There are way too many condominiums there! Does she want me to check on them one by one?! Tsk! She even told me she"d just send me the complete address once she"s free. She should"ve just told me as we talked instead of making me wait.
I dropped by Allen"s office, but he"s not there; he"s on leave according to his secretary. Ugh! I couldn"t help it anymore; I badly want to arrange our annulment the soonest, so here I am, personally reaching out to him, so we could have it discussed. I won"t be needing his approval about it right away; I just want him to know that I"m serious about it and I"m already working on it.
I"ve already consulted a lawyer earlier and sh*t, I didn"t know that annulment is such a hard thing to fix. It even appears to be more difficult to arrange than a wedding! The whole process knocked me down like a feather! I thought it was just as easy as having a good lawyer and filing the pet.i.tion for the actual annulment, but what the h.e.l.l – the pet.i.tion itself appears to be so laborious; not to mention that we still need some psychological evaluation and attend several court trials.
I wasn"t able to fully absorb what the lawyer explained earlier. My world turned upside down to the whole process. Tsk. What"s more difficult is that I couldn"t get a witnesses whom I could bring to the trials. There"s just one person who knows almost everything between Allen and I – my cousin, Leila. The problem is, I know she"s not with me on this thing. She can"t even give me Allen"s address, knowing that I"d go there to discuss our annulment. She"s giving me countless reasons when obviously, she just doesn"t want us to separate legally. I really can"t understand her. These past few years, I can sense that her loyalty is not with me. I wonder what Allen gave her to get her sympathy. Tsk!
I reached for my cellphone as it suddenly rang. I thought it was Leila who"s calling, but no, it"s Claire. I answered her call and put the speakerphone on as I was driving. The least that I wanted at the moment was getting caught to a traffic violation.
“Yes, Claire?”
“Uhm, Miss Vanessa, you have a box of cake delivered here.”
I sighed as I rolled my eyes, “Who"s that from again? Is it from Gavin?”
“N-no. It"s from your husband as written on the card.”
For a moment, I quickly stroked on my temples. Tsk! When will he stop? What is he proving? He"s being such a pain on the a.s.s! “O-okay. I"ll be back later. Take charge of the office first? Call me if there"s a problem."
“Okay, Miss Vanessa.” Claire responded and then ended the phone call.
Again, I hurled my phone back inside my bag. Oh, Allen! Honestly, he"s being so annoyingly persistent. With what he"s doing, all the more that he"s convincing me to proceed with the annulment.
It"s been a week. We didn"t have any dinner after the first one, but Allen didn"t stop bothering me since – he"s been constantly giving me boxes of cake. Sometimes he would have it delivered to Rioscents and sometimes he would have it given to me personally. He won"t stay for long, he would just drop by to hand me the cake and I don"t know what"s pus.h.i.+ng him to do that. What I know is that after I told him that Gavin always brings me some cake, he also started giving me some. I don"t know if he"s battling against him or what. It"s annoying, though. I didn"t tell him to do that! I even told him to stop, but he"s really hard-headed that he wouldn"t. What does he think, that he"ll have me back because of some cake? h.e.l.l, no! He"s even planning on making me fat! Tsk.
The day before yesterday, I thought he grew tired of it already as I didn"t receive a box of cake. But tsk! Surprisingly, there"s another one! I don"t really know what"s into him. I reached for my phone once again as it rang - it was Leila that time. At last, she texted me Allen"s address. I"ve been waiting for ages!
I drove faster. It"s a good thing that the traffic was not heavy going out of Global City. I just wish that he"s there in his condo. I don"t want this day to end without having our annulment discussed.
In just less than half an hour, I"ve arrived in Makati. It didn"t take me long before I found Allen"s place. I immediately went inside and looked for his unit. As I arrived in front of his door, I rang his doorbell with no second thoughts. I stood strong, putting my brave front on. It"s already too late to feel scared and turn back. Besides, fighting with Leila earlier would be a waste if I won"t proceed.
I rang the doorbell again as Allen was taking time to open. Tsk. What is he doing inside? I was about to knock when the door suddenly opened. Then, I saw his face surprised after he saw me. Well, he was not expecting me to pay him a visit.
“V-vanessa…” He haltingly greeted.
I avoided his gaze and held the brown envelope more tightly, “I"m sorry, did I disturb you?” I shyly asked as I think I woke him up. His hair was a mess and he was only wearing his boxers and a white t-s.h.i.+rt.
“N-no, it"s okay. Come in.” He invited, and then opened his door wider.
After I went in, I heard him cough and sneeze slightly, which made me look at him, “You sick?” I still asked even if it was already obvious. I also noticed he looked pale.
“Yeah. A bit. But I already feel better. Have a seat. Y-you want anything? Coffee, tea, juice? S-sorry I don"t have softdrinks.”
I sneered deep inside. Why does he seem to be in panic? And oh, he still doesn"t drink softdrinks up to now. “Don"t bother. I won"t be staying for too long.” I said to stop him before I sat on the couch. I placed the envelope on my lap as I was wearing a long-sleeved, fitted, mini-dress.
Nonetheless, Allen still went to his kitchen to get me some drink. I could only shake my head; it"s his call anyway. And as he was busy preparing, my eyes wandered around his unit. He"s still the same old Allen I know - his things are well-organized, neat, and properly arranged. He really hates it when the place is a clutter. And just after a while, he came back and placed a gla.s.s of orange juice on the center table, and then he sat down on the couch across me.
“Thanks.” I said, but I didn"t have a sip on the gla.s.s of juice. I just looked at it as I was not really thirsty at that moment.
He smiled a little and asked, “Have you received the cake? I"m sorry, I would really like to give it personally, but I"m on sick leave.”
“Yes, I did. Claire called me that it arrived in the office. I already told you, you don"t have to do that.”
“You"re welcome. And you"re here for?” He said, changing the topic.
I sighed deeply. Okay… Fine. I won"t go in circles. I placed the envelope on the center table, and then I saw the change of reaction on his face as he asked, “What"s that?”
“You may check it.” I answered.
First, he shut his eyes for a while before he decided to reach for the envelope. I know he has an idea of what"s inside. Then, he started reading the papers.
“I already consulted an attorney this morning. I also made a research about him just to make sure she"s really reliable. Everything"s already written there including a sample pet.i.tion for annulment. I will do the filing so it won"t cause you any trouble. I just need some supporting doc.u.ments.” I explained as he went through the doc.u.ments.
I was waiting for him to answer as he wasn"t saying a word. I don"t know if he understood what I said, though I did try my best to explain it simply and clearly.
After a while, he wobbly placed the doc.u.ments back to the table. I don"t think he was able to read everything inside the envelope. I just saw him stroke his temples – I think I"m not the only one who was knocked down like a feather by the whole process.
“The process is quite complicated. I know–”
“You went here just for that?” He interrupted me, looking at me fiercely.
I avoided his gaze and responded with conviction, “Yes. I just want you to know that I"m starting to arrange our annulment. I don"t want you to get surprised after I have filed the pet.i.tion to the regional trial court. You should even thank me for this… That I still think about you.”
“Why are you doing this to me, Vanessa?” He asked in a very serious tone, and so I turned my eyes back to him. We looked at each other straight in the eyes.
“You know the reasons, Allen. Don"t let me tell you again because I don"t want to remember. I just want to end this and be free.”
He bowed down, shaking his head. He was also not far away from me so I can hear him breathe so heavily. He even sniffed.
“I don"t know why you needed to come here. You know for a fact that I won"t ever approve that.” He said with certainty on his voice without s.h.i.+fting his gaze toward me.
I rolled my eyes, “I don"t need your approval. I just want you to know. Because nonetheless, I will pursue this. I"ll file a pet.i.tion first thing tomorrow morning.” I said, even if I"m not sure if I will be able to finish the pet.i.tion right away.
Again, I heard him sigh. He rested both of his elbows on his knees, and then he lifted his head to look at me. He looked at me so deeply, straight into the eyes, “Why do you want to annul our marriage so bad? Do you understand what you wanna happen, Vanessa? You want our marriage to be erased! Do you think I will agree on that?”
“Of course I know what I"m doing. I don"t wanna be your wife. All I"m asking is for us to go our separate ways.”
He sternly brushed his hair with his fingers. Tsk. I can sense him feeling frustrated and confused at the same time. But this is what I want – I want a separation.
“Are you doing this just so you can do whatever you want? If that"s the reason, Van… I want you to know that I"ll allow you to do whatever you want. You can do anything you want. You don"t have to do this.”
I sighed, “You really don"t understand our situation, do you? Do I need to enumerate everything that happened just so you can understand why we need to separate? I want this marriage to end and I don"t want anything that has to do with you. Please, Allen, let"s just set each other free.”
And then he looked at me fiercely.
“No annulment will take place, Vanessa. Don"t try me. You may leave now.” He said in an authoritative voice and then stamped his feet as he stood up from the couch.
I raised an eyebrow and followed him with a fierce look. Fine, then! I returned the doc.u.ments back inside the envelope, reached for my shoulder bag, and stood up.
“You know what, Allen, you"re right. Why did I even bother coming here when I know you wouldn"t help me? Fine! I don"t need your support anyway. I can do this alone. I don"t need you.” I aggressively stated as I rolled my eyes on him. He"s such a thick-faced a.s.shole! He should be thankful I"m telling him all my plans. He"d be more hurt if he sees my pet.i.tion up on the newspapers.
I was about to go out of the door when I felt him behind me. I felt strange. He suddenly embraced me from behind! It made me shut my eyes hard and tight. Sh*t! I even had gooseb.u.mps after he kissed my head.
“Let me go.” I said in a nice way, but he won"t.
I tried to release myself from his embrace, but he stood tough. Instead, he buried himself onto my neck. I felt his warm breath that I could only curse deep inside. The envelope I was holding fell down on the floor. I snapped and released myself forcibly, “What the h.e.l.l! I said let me go! You told me to leave, right?!”
“I"m sorry. I changed my mind. Don"t leave.” He calmly said, and then wrapped his arms more tightly around me. My bones almost cracked!
He"s really getting into my nerves. With all my strength, I released myself from his embrace. I turned around and slapped him hard on the face. a.s.sh*le!
He slightly licked the side of his lips as he caressed his cheek.
“And what was that, huh?” I asked in gritted teeth. “You embraced me for what? Huh? So that I would change my mind? Is that it huh?”
Then I faked a laugh, “I"m sorry, but I"m not the same Vanessa anymore. You won"t get me with your sweet gestures. I just want to… I just want us to talk calmly and sincerely. But you"re p.i.s.sing me off.”
I picked the envelope up from the floor. I was about to turn my back on him and open the door, but he suddenly held me tight on both of my shoulders, “Tell me, Van. What do you want me to do for you not to proceed with the annulment?” He asked while looking straight into my eyes.
I closed my eyes, “Nothing and you can"t stop me. I"m decided, Allen. I thought you"ve accepted that already after I left you.”
He shook my shoulders and said, “Look at me…”
After I opened my eyes, I saw his gaze full of sincerity.
“I don"t want us to separate.” He continued, “You know I don"t want it and I won"t agree on our separation. So please Van, stop this.”
I smirked at him; he looked like he"s begging me. I said, “Was that the reason you hugged me? Why, can"t you think of any other way to stop me?” I challenged.
His eyes turned aggressive. I seem to have ticked him off.
“Actually, there are many other ways. But I choose to do the easiest.” He bragged, and then he suddenly held my face closer to his.
I know that he"d kiss me, so I forcibly moved my face, “Don"t you da—” but d.a.m.n, he"s stronger than I am! Before I could even move my face, his lips has already conquered mine. G.o.d! I could only shut my eyes hard as everything I was holding fell down on the floor. It felt like all blood ran up my face!
I tried to release myself. I even slapped him several times on his chest, but he was able to take a grip of my hands just like that. Sh*t, this can"t happen! I couldn"t fall into his trap again! He can"t do this to me! So I gathered all my strength to escape from his grip. I wanted to slap him hard again, but I felt so weak. I turned around and was about to run toward the door, but he suddenly wrapped his arms around my waist!
“Where do you think you"re going, my wife?” Oh, the seductive tone on his voice! All the more that gooseb.u.mps shed all over my body!
“d.a.m.n you, Allen! Let me go! You are such a pervert!” I screamed. I was already bending down as I can"t remove his arms around me.
“You can"t get away from me again.”
“Y-yes I can!” I fought, but I still can"t release myself from him. He even held me tighter in his arms. d.a.m.n it! I"m feeling drained! I"m losing energy!
“Don"t fight me on this, Van. Please, let me.”
“No! You"re just forcing me to hate you more! Let me go!”
He forcibly turned me around to face him. I was about to slap him, but he was able to catch my hand and stop me.
“Let"s stop hurting each other.” He said in a serious tone, and then he kissed me again! I sniffed and closed my eyes. His kiss was harder this time. Then, he moved one of his hands to my nape, and the other on my waist to pull me closer.
“allen!” I screamed as he intentionally moved me closer to his crotch area. NO! No way! I could feel him! Hard! I couldn"t give in! I moved my hand to his chest, so we won"t touch our skins completely.
He slid his tongue inside my mouth, and then I lost control. I also have no strength left to push him away, and so he was able to put me against the wall. He pinned me there and rubbed his body against mine.
“S-stop…” I begged. I tried to escape from his wet, wild kisses, but he just won"t let me! I wasn"t even kissing him back! The next thing he did, he lifted me up in front of him.
“Don"t…” He had my legs circled around his waist, and so my fitted dress slid up my thighs and my underwear showed off! s.h.i.+t, he also took my shoes off! Is he trying to rape me?! I tried to escape, even if the truth is, I don"t have the strength anymore. I"m feeling weak at the knees.
He only kissed me harder that I could hear him panting. He was like eating me wholly literally! My heart throbbed fast as he laid me down the carpeted floor, “s.h.i.+t Allen, n-no! You can"t do this to me!” I screamed.
I tried to lift myself up. He was in the middle of my thighs when he hastily pulled his t-s.h.i.+rt off his body. I could see so much desire in his eyes and it scared the wits out of me. s.h.i.+t! Please, no! Then I noticed a tattoo near his collarbone. I was about to touch it, but he stopped me. Instead, he locked my hand on the floor and pulled my waist closer to him, “G.o.d, Allen!”
He put himself on top of me, and then he started kissing me again! I looked in a different direction as he sucked and bit my lips. My lips were almost wounded! One of his hands were now on my waist; he was squeezing it like he"s filled with so much desire! I could hear his hard, deep breathing, as if he was so much thirsty of what he"s doing, like he just couldn"t stop.
I won"t kiss him back. h.e.l.l, I won"t do that! I gave him no response the whole time. I just let him do what he wanted. I was only laying down the floor while he was busy doing his thing. I decided to just wait until he"s done.
As his hand crawled down my back, his kisses moved down my neck. He sucked that part, and then he slightly lifted my back. I sniffed when he opened the zipper on the back of my dress. I can feel the cold breeze on my skin. I"m a bundle of nerves; my heart"s beating so fast! I"m sure he could feel my heart pounding. I know that in just a blink of an eye, he could take off my clothes, leaving me naked on the floor. What if he wouldn"t stop?
I tried to escape, but he pulled me back again. He was literally so hot. I don"t know if it was because he"s sick, or because of what he"s doing to me. He then ground against me, like we"re having s.e.x with clothes on! I can feel him – so hard – as my underwear was paper-thin and he was only wearing his boxers. He"s so d.a.m.n hard, like a tiger that would bail out of the jungle! NO! I don"t want to feel him! But s.h.i.+t, I know my body would go against me anytime.
I controlled my body and tried to calm my breathing. I was already tempted to circle my legs around his waist, but I held myself back. No! He"s just seducing me so I won"t pursue our annulment. This is just his trap! I can"t just fall for this one!
He stroked my thighs and rammed his half-naked body against mine, while sucking the other side of my neck. I moved my face to a different direction irately. He"s so much thirsty for s.e.x! I hate him! He"s such a disgusting s.e.x machine!
Sonner, he might have felt I didn"t want this, so he stopped and lifted himself up from top of me. I waited for my breathing to stabilize before I turned my eyes on him again. I gave him a bored look while he looked at me in confusion, then I said very coldly, “You done?”
He s.h.i.+fted his head onto a different direction, and then sat down beside me. He pulled his hair and said, “I… I"m sorry. I didn"t mean to.” He was panting that he could only say it in a low voice.
I lifted myself up and sat down. I pushed my dress down so that it could cover my thighs. Tsk. How do I look like? I tried to close the zipper of my dress, but it was hard for me to reach. I was stunned when he helped me on it, but I avoided him immediately, “I can manage!”
“You seemed so s.e.x-starved, Allen. You"re worse than before. You"re making me hate you even more.” I said in gritted teeth. I was about to stand up, but he held me on the elbows to stop me from doing so.
And then he sighed, “I"m really sorry, Van. This won"t happen again. I promise. Please. I just missed you so much. I don"t know what to do.” His voice almost cracked.
I looked at him with one eyebrow raised, “That"s why you"re pus.h.i.+ng me to do this? Why, do you think I"ll come back to you through this? You think I"d give in? Well, surprise Allen! You"re definitely wrong. You still hasn"t changed. You still don"t know any other way to get what you want.”
“No, t-that"s not true.”
He lifted his face up and said, “Van… I want to be honest to you.” He looked at me straight in the eyes and I didn"t avoid his gaze.
“I want you to know that even if what you"re doing is very difficult for me… I don"t like how you"re acting around me. I"m trying my best, yet you still act cold. I don"t want you being like this. You"re hurting me.”
“You pushed me to be like this, Allen.”
He bowed down again, “I"m sorry. What do you want me to do? I already gave you the s.p.a.ce you needed. I didn"t bother you. Weren"t those enough for you to forgive me?”
And then he looked at me, but this time, I turned my eyes to a different direction.
“Give me another chance. That"s all I"m asking. I know it"s hard on your part, but I swear not to put it to waste. I will be the husband you wanted me to be.”
He held my face and moved it to face him, “The day you left, I told you I love you, and that"s true. I could say it to you again right now if you want. I"d tell you that every day until you tell me to stop.”
He reached for my hands and stroke them on his cheeks. Tsk. Here he goes with his sweet gestures again.
“I"m really sorry for what I did a while ago. Sorry if I pushed you, or if I scared you. You know the reason why I did it. Don"t pursue the annulment, Van. Give me a chance to prove myself. I… I can"t say I"m a better man now. It"s only you who could tell that. But believe it or not, I tried to change myself. Just for you. So you could accept me again. I"m not that a.s.shole man you married before.”
I could only roll my eyes and sigh. Why is he making things so complicated? Tsk. He"s making the situation even harder! I told him I don"t want this anymore! Why can"t he understand it? All he"s saying are nonsense!
I pulled my hands from him and stood up. He also stood up and held my hand again, “Van, please. Do you want me on my knees in front of you? I"ll do it. Anything you want, Van. Just… Just be mine again.”
I looked at him and saw him so helpless. I shook head in response, “You don"t have to.” And then I sighed, “I"m sorry, Allen, but it"s gone. I already fell out of love from the moment I left you. Even if you"d turn me upside down from where I"m standing at right now, I have nothing left for you. I"ve given you everything before, but you took it for granted, right? Just set me free, Allen. I"ll be lonely if I stay bearing your name. My decision is final. I"m doing this.”
I was about to pull my hand again, but he held it tighter. I can feel his whole body shaking, like he will breakdown soon. I can also feel that his whole body turned hotter.
“I won"t give up on you.” He insisted and said while his eyes were closed.
For a moment there, I also shut my eyes. I was losing my patience already, “Why are you being so stubborn?”
He looked at me straight, “I just want to get back what"s mine."
“Allen, please! Let"s stop this, okay? I"m tired of the same old s.h.i.+ts. When will we ever stop?!”
“I won"t stop, Vanessa.” He said with conviction.
“I"ll return everything that you lost, Van. I will make you whole again. Then you"ll be able to love me again.” He bowed down, still holding my hand.
“Tsk. Sorry, I don"t care if you"d grow angrier at me, or if you"d be more annoyed. Yell at me, slap me… Go ahead. I don"t care. I really don"t care. I won"t let you slip away from me again, Vanessa. Mark my word.”
I sternly pulled my hand from his hold. I was really feeling irate, so I snapped, “Do whatever you want! It"s your call. It"s your choice. But I"m warning you, Allen… I won"t ever come back to you again. I"ll file my pet.i.tion tomorrow morning. We"ll see each other in court.” I said, and then turned around and left.
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