When Angel glanced up to see if Hawk understood, his clear, dark eyes were watching her with unusual intensity.
Suddenly she felt the heat of him reaching through his clothing, through her clothing, spreading through her in waves that made her dizzy. Her heart beat raggedly. Her breath caught in the back of her throat and stayed there.
She was incredibly aware of her breast brushing against Hawkas arm, her nipple tightening until it ached. Her eyes darkened as her pupils expanded, all but eclipsing the blue-green iris.
Angel was too inexperienced to recognize the symptoms of sudden, pa.s.sionate arousal. Hawk wasnat. Every one of his senses was fully alert, quivering with the signals that radiated from Angel.
He wanted to put his hands on her, all of her, and then take her completely, finishing what her touch on his wrist had started. But Derry could come into the kitchen at any moment. Or in the next breath Angel could remember where she was, and draw back.
Hawk had waited this long for the right moment, for the last sudden turn, the cry, the capture. He could wait longer. He could wait until Angel walked into the open, all pretense of innocence and retreat gone.
Slowly Hawk turned back to the counter. As he moved, his arm brushed slowly over Angelas breast.
Her breath came in swiftly, brokenly. She stared at Hawk for an instant, wondering if he felt even a small part of what she was feeling.
No expression showed beneath his dark features. For all that Angel could see, Hawk hadnat noticed her reaction to his closeness. Nor had he reacted to being close to her.
The realization should have comforted Angel, but it didnat. It made her feel lost, lonely, almost afraid. Sadness and pa.s.sion ached in her.
Is Hawk so used to being alone that he canat respond to me?
Or is it simply that I survived Grantas death only to find myself wanting a man who neither needs nor wants me?
Angel stood motionless in the kitchen, seeing nothing, not even Hawk. The thoughts turning in her mind consumed her.
She realized that it was not merely eagerness to go fishing that had made her blood race when she had awakened today. It was the knowledge that she was going to have Hawk to herself.
No Derry. No phone calls from New York and Texas and Tokyo to delay sightseeing trips and picnics. Nothing but Hawk and Angel and the restless, island-studded sea. Five days alone. Perhaps more.
Anything could happen in that time.
Even love.
The thought shocked Angel for an instant. Then she accepted it the same way she had finally accepted the automobile accident that had so brutally changed her life.
Running from the truth doesnat change anything, certainly not reality, Angel reminded herself. Running just weakens you.
And I will have to be very strong with Hawk.
Quietly, standing in the kitchen not an armas length from Hawk, Angel admitted to herself that if she spent much more time with him, she ran the risk of caring for him too much. She was powerfully drawn to the lonely reaches of his mind, the intelligence and power of him, the rare gentleness that spoke so movingly of the emotions hidden beneath his harshness.
Hawk was like a stained gla.s.s window in a black night, mystery and brooding hints of color. So much darkness, so little life. Yet when bathed in sunlight, the beauty inherent in the gla.s.s would leap into silent, overwhelming life, all the colors of love pouring forth where only darkness had been before.
Angel didnat know if she was strong enough to be the sunlight to Hawkas stained gla.s.s.
She only knew she had to try.
11.
Angel looked at the clock on the boatas control panel and swore silently. Everything seemed to conspire against getting Hawk out on the water at the best time for some decent fishing.
It was five oaclock, and they had barely cleared Campbell River.
For a moment Angel considered slowing and trolling along the floating rafts of logs waiting to be picked up by a towboat and hauled to Vancouver Bay. Some good-sized salmon had been known to school up under the rafts.
aSomething wrong?a asked Hawk, his voice pitched above the sound of the engines.
His eyes raked quickly over the gauges. He saw nothing to account for Angelas sudden frown.
aIam tempted to fish here,a Angel said, disgusted.
aFine with me.a ad.a.m.n it, I was looking forward to drift fishing off Indian Head.a A corner of Hawkas mouth turned up slightly.
aSorry,a he said. aI didnat know the Honorable Mr. Yokagamo would have insomnia and decide to call me. I got rid of him as soon as I could without insulting him.a aAnd then London called.a aParis, actually. London was the next call.a aThen Tokyo again.a Angel shook her head. Having to look at a globe and have a clock that kept time in every world zone before you even answered the phone struck her as an unnerving way to do business.
It seemed to come easily to Hawk, though. She could see his quick intelligence a.s.sessing every possibility and lining up arguments even as he reached for the phone. His concentration, memory, and patience were phenomenal.
He would make an excellent fisherman if she ever got him out on the water long enough to teach him anything. As it was, they were only going to get a short distance up the coast before dark.
aWell, as long as weare late anyway, we might as well stop in at Brownas Bay,a Angel said. aWeall top off the tanks, catch up on the fishing gossip, and then head over to Deepwater Bay for the night. If weare in luck, we might even get in some salmon fishing.a aYou donat sound hopeful.a aItas early for salmon to be there, but,a Angel shrugged eloquently, awe have to get our lines wet somewhere.a aOr youall go crazy.a aThat is a distinct possibility.a She gave Hawk a sideways look out of green eyes. aHave you ever considered taking a vow of silence for a few days?a The left corner of Hawkas mouth curled slightly.
aTired of my phone calls?a he asked.
aYou could say that. And then you could say it again.a aIave been meaning to break this to you gently.a aWhat?a aI have to check in with Tokyo tomorrow evening.a Hawk saw the combination of disappointment and irritation that crossed Angelas features.
aWe donat have to go back to Campbell River,a Hawk added. aI can patch through on the radio.a aDo you mind if I fish while you talk?a Angel asked crisply, exasperated by the unending demands of Hawkas business.
aItas not always this bad.a The corner of Hawkas mouth lifted again. aSometimes itas worse.a Angel shook her head in despair.
aMost of the time itas better,a added Hawk.
He measured Angelas disappointment and wished he could be sure that it was his company rather than the chance to fish that she was missing.
aThe deal Iam working on is rather complex,a Hawk said. aTomorrowas call should be that last major hump for a few weeks.a Angel made a neutral sound. She had heard that before. Yesterday, to be exact.
Automatically, Angel cut back the speed as she turned into Brownas Bay. The first thing she saw was the black, long-line troller tied at the dock. Her hand tightened on the throttle.
aCarlson!a Angel said, delighted.
As she guided the boat into a berth near the fuel pumps, Hawk watched her intently. Anger turned deep inside him when he saw the clear light of pleasure erase for a moment the haunting sadness that was so much a part of Angelas eyes.
Hawk looked away from her, raking the marina with his dark glance until he spotted the battered troller tied opposite the pleasure boats. Black Moon was painted on the trolleras side. Men were unloading fish from the shipas hold into wheelbarrows and pushing them up the dock to a scale. There the fish were weighed and put into a refrigerated truck to be hauled to market.
Quickly Angel shut down the engines and left the c.o.c.kpit. The manager of the station tied off the bow while Angel leaped out and tied off the stern, leaving Hawk standing in the boat.
aAll the way to the top, Don,a Angel called out.
Then she sprinted up the dock, turned, and ran down an intersecting dock toward the Black Moon, calling Carlsonas name with every breath.
Hawk leaped lightly to the dock, following Angel with long strides. He was halfway down the intersecting dock when he saw a very big man descend from the Black Moon and stand waiting for Angel, his ma.s.sive arms spread wide.
Angel threw herself into Carlsonas arms and was lifted and spun around and around like a leaf in a whirlwind. She laughed and held on, letting the colors of the world blur around her.
aHow are you? Was the run good? When are you going back? Oh, Carlson, you look fantastic!a Angel said, questions and words tumbling out of her. aWas the storm bad? Did you get any smileys?a Carlsonas laugh was as big as the rest of him.
aSlow down, Angie.a Angel threw her arms around Carlsonas ma.s.sive neck and hugged him with all her strength, burying her face in the rough, masculine textures of his work shirt. He smelled of sea and salmon and sweat. The combination brought a storm of memories sweeping over her.
Shaking, Angel held on to Carlson until the storm pa.s.sed.
Gently Carlson let her down onto the dock, cradling her head against his chest. He knew that seeing him always brought Grant Ramsey back to her. Dead, Grant was between them as much as he had been when he was alive. Carlson accepted it as he accepted bad fishing and violent storms. Some things were not meant to be.
For him, Angel was one of them.
aHowas it been for you, Angie?a Carlson asked.
He tugged gently on her thick French braid, remembering when her beautiful eyes had held a quality of dawning laughter rather than silent shadows.
aHowas the gla.s.s?a Carlson asked.
aThe Vancouver show was good.a aNo, youare the one whoas good.a Angel smiled up into Carlsonas brilliant black eyes.
aI have so many new designs I want to do,a she said. aOne of them is the Black Moon and the sea and the salmon beneath like a silent silver storm. Would you like that?a aIad love it, but I canat afford it. Fishing has been real slow this year.a Angel looked shocked. aItas a gift!a aYour smile is gift enough,a Carlson said quietly.
Then he glanced over the top of Angelas head into a manas icy brown eyes.
aYou must be Hawk,a Carlson said.
Hawk nodded once.
aIam Carlson.a Hawk took the hand that was offered. Both men measured each other with a strong handshake that stopped well short of the adolescent knuckle squeezing that some big men indulged in.
aHowas fishing?a asked Carlson.
aItasa"a began Hawk.
aDonat ask,a interrupted Angel. aIam going to have to surgically disconnect Hawk from the telephone if I want to catch any salmon this summer.a Carlson smiled, his teeth like a white half-moon against his dark face.
aYou havenat missed much yet,a Carlson said. aThe run is just starting.a When he looked down into Angelas face, his smile faded. The lines and shadows of the past were there for him to read just beneath her smooth surface.
aIam glad you found me,a Carlson said. aIam heading back out tomorrow morning. Derry said you were going to be gone for five days. Will he be alone tonight?a Angel nodded slowly. aFor a while. He said he didnat mind. He was going to have some friends over later and play cards until he couldnat see straight.a Hawk caught the ripple of emotion beneath Angelas words. It irritated him, just as watching her held in Carlsonas big arms irritated him.
aToday is the twelfth, isnat it?a Hawk asked.
Carlson nodded and said nothing.
aIs there something special about that date?a Hawk asked, his voice sardonic and his eyes piercing. aThis is the second time Iave heard it mentioned in hushed tones.a Carlsonas eyes changed, becoming as opaque as the black rocks lining the bay. Everything about the big Indian warned Hawk that he was trespa.s.sing.
Hawk stood without flinching, waiting for his answer. He had fought big men before. And he was tired of watching Angel nestled within those thick arms.
Angel ignored Hawk, looking only at Carlson.
aIf youare going out right away,a Angel said distinctly, athe fishing must be pretty good.a aNot bad. I set aside a smiley to smoke for you and Derry.a aWhatas a smiley?a Hawk asked. aOr is that another taboo matter?a Carlson gave Hawk a second black look.
Hawk didnat budge.
Grudgingly, Carlson realized that Hawk wasnat going to be intimidated short of a brawl, and probably not even then. Under other circ.u.mstances, Carlson would have enjoyed testing Hawk. But not today, with Angel fighting memories.
Carlson suspected that Hawk was more than a little interested in the woman who was curled so trustingly against his own chest. The thought made Carlsonas lips stretch into a smile that was neither welcoming nor cruel.
aA smiley,a said Carlson, his voice so deep that it rumbled like water over rocks, ais a salmon that weighs more than thirty pounds. When you pull one of them off the long line, you smile.a The corner of Hawkas mouth curled up almost unwillingly. aI see.a aYou will when you catch one,a Carlson said. aOr do you ever smile?a aIam smiling now.a Carlson laughed.
aCome fishing with me, Hawk,a Carlson offered. aBy the end of the trip weall be friendsa"or one of us will be dead.a For a moment Hawk simply looked at the ma.s.sive man standing so confidently on the dock. Then Hawk held out his hand, liking the big Indian in spite of himself.
aIall hold you to that, Carlson,a Hawk said.
Carlson took the offered hand. Just before he released it, he said easily, aOne other thing, Hawk. If you touch Angie, Iall cut you into thin strips and use you for bait.a aCarlsona"!a Angel said, angry and appalled.
Hawk was neither. aWhat if she wants me to touch her?a Carlson looked from Angelas flushed face to Hawkas fiercely impa.s.sive expression.
aThen Iad say you were the luckiest man alive.a Carlson turned and kissed Angelas forehead. aDonas waving for you to get that fancy boat out of the way. See you in a few days, Angie. By then,a he added, smiling, amaybe youall be over your mad.a Shaking her head helplessly, Angel stood on tiptoe to kiss Carlsonas black-stubbled cheek.
aI canat ever stay mad at you,a she said. Then she added crisply, aThough G.o.d knows I should. You might consider apologizing to Hawk.a Carlsonas black eyes were brilliant with suppressed laughter as he looked over Angelas head at Hawk.
aI might, but Iam not going to. You understand, donat you, Hawk?a aPerfectly.a Hawkas mouth had a tiny sardonic curl at the left corner that said he understood very well indeed.
Angel went back down the dock, hurried on her way by a friendly swat from Carlsonas big hand. She glanced sideways at Hawk, still embarra.s.sed by Carlsonas warning. The slight upward tilt of Hawkas mouth told Angel that he was amused rather than angered.
But then, he had shown no signs of wanting to touch her. Not really.
Not the way she wanted to be touched.
12.