Chapter 392: Let Us Play It
Men in this world were much more reserved with their emotions, and a n.o.bleman would be even more inclined to keeping his feelings in check. He would have learned to do so from quite a young age.
If she were to compare the traditions she had grown accustomed to with those from her world, it would be more similar to the customs of ancient times. Furthermore, as aspiring cultivators, men in the sect were often raised to consider romantic feelings a hurdle or something to be suppressed, not something to pursue. It would be rare for a lover or a husband to profess his affections to his beloved, if the action was not nonexistent.
In this regard, Zhu Qingyue"s avoidance of the opportunity to confess his feelings was not entirely out of the norm.
Zhu Qingyue was a man of few words. As such, he was the type to show his genuine feelings through his actions rather than his words. Even though Li Meirong was certain that he cared deeply for her, she really would have liked to hear a verbal confession of his feelings to be rea.s.sured that what she felt for him was mutual.
After all, they had met under rather awkward and less than ideal circ.u.mstances. Their first act of intimacy had been under the influence of an aphrodisiac, of all things!
One could not really consider their first meeting, or even their second, as a case of "love at first sight".
Furthermore, this was not the first time that Li Meirong had been in a relations.h.i.+p in which she had felt the affection of another. She knew well enough that this emotion called love could change as easily as the course of the wind.
"What troubles you, darling?" Zhu Qingyue whispered by her ear, his hot breath leaving a tickling sensation against her skin.
Li Meirong cast her gaze down, grasping Zhu Qingyue"s wrist to give a rea.s.suring squeeze despite her own turmoil.
"It"s nothing of great importance," she murmured. She wanted to tell him about the nightmare she had experienced under the pixie"s influence, and how glad she was that nothing she had seen of him in that illusion had been real.
She wanted to ask him if he loved her, and she wanted to tell him that she hadn"t been completely honest with him. She wanted to tell him that this body was not originally her own.
Yet, she couldn"t bring herself to speak any of the words she wanted to say.
Fear gripped her, coiling like a noose about her throat. What if the pixie"s words were true, and the illusion had in fact shown her a form of truth? What if she asked him if he loved her and his answer was "no"?
Worse yet, what would his reaction be to knowing that this body was not truly her own?
Such a thing would make her nothing more than a ghost possessing another person to a.s.sume their ident.i.ty. A fraud.
The arm that encircled her waist wandered upwards to cup her jaw gently. Slowly, Zhu Qingyue turned her around to face him, his movements careful and gentle despite how she would be entirely unable to resist his strength.
Her eyes remained downcast, avoiding his stare.
"Look at me," he said. Li Meirong bit her lower lip and then dared to meet his eyes.
"There is nothing troubling me," she said finally, her voice curt, after a long stretch of silence.
She shoved down all her insecurities, bottling them up, as she offered him a tight, shallow smile.
"What is causing you such anxiety?" Zhu Qingyue asked as he stroked her cheek, his touch as tender as his husky voice was soft.
Was that what she was feeling? Anxiety? His question struck her hard.
As matters went, she came to realize that all of her bottled-up insecurities were related to him.
"It"s you," she whispered. As she spoke, her eyes widened as if she had surprised herself with her answer. "You make me anxious."
Zhu Qingyue mirrored her reaction, appearing no less bewildered than she was. An outside observer might even consider the situation comical due to their reactions.
"I do not understand," Zhu Qingyue admitted in what appeared to be a rare moment of honesty.
He straightened up and helped Li Meirong to adjust herself into a cross-legged position. They were now seated opposite each other, facing each other head-on.
"Have I done anything in particular for you to feel this way?" he asked.
It was difficult for Li Meirong to open up, but now that she had the chance to sit down and have a proper conversation with Zhu Qingyue, she felt like she couldn"t afford to miss out on the opportunity to finally talk things out with him.
She might have known him for several years now, technically, but their relations.h.i.+p had only solidified very recently. It wouldn"t be incorrect to say that they were currently both in the phase of a relations.h.i.+p where they were starting to get to know each other properly…
What could be a greater cause for insecurity than knowing next to nothing about your own partner?
Thinking about it in that sense, she found her worries to be a little silly. All of her fears truly came down to one single point: how she was being perceived by Zhu Qingyue.
Before she had a chance to reply to his question, or voice her newfound realization, Zhu Qingyue reached across the small s.p.a.ce between them to grasp her hand gently in his.
"Know that no matter what you wish to tell me, none of it will ever change my mind," he told her. His eyes were locked with hers; the force of his gaze stole her breath away. "I will never let you go."
Despite how possessive he sounded, she couldn"t help but smile at his words. Perhaps this was what she had wanted or needed to hear all this time. He hadn"t confessed his love, but he told her that he would never let her go. In other words, he would stay by her side always.
The corners of Li Meirong"s lips curved upwards as her mood lightened up, revealing a pair of previously hidden dimples. Her smile brightened her whole face, making her almost seem like she was glowing.
Zhu Qingyue simply stared, appearing a little dazed. Li Meirong was totally unaware of how charming she could be, if she wanted to.
Oblivious to how deeply she managed to affect the man opposite her, she leaned forward and kissed Zhu Qingyue quickly but firmly. She didn"t notice the flush of red upon the back of his neck at her boldness, nor how his ears tinted red.
She thought Zhu Qingyue seemed entirely nonchalant about the kiss, simply staring blankly at her, but she didn"t mind. He probably didn"t think all that much about such a small gesture anyway…
"Let"s play a game," she suddenly suggested. "It"s called two truths and a lie."
Zhu Qingyue raised a quizzical eyebrow at her sudden change of att.i.tude, but humored her anyway.
"And how does one play this game?" he asked.
"Each of us must make two truthful statements and one lie about ourselves, and the other must guess which is true and which is a lie," Li Meirong explained. "It would be a good way for us to get to know each other better."
She displayed no small amount of enthusiasm as she spoke, and Zhu Qingyue chuckled lightly as he leaned back against the wall behind him.
"This game of yours… let us play it."