"Well, that was heroic too," returned he.
"And no one but Glenmurray would have been so heroic, I believe," said Adeline.
"But, lady, you break my heart," cried the mulatto, "if you not take my service. Mr William and me, too poor to live togedder of some year perhaps. Here, child, tawny boy, down on knees, and vow wid me to be faithful and grateful to this our mistress, till our last day; and never to forsake her in sickness or in sorrow! I swear dis to my great G.o.d:--and now say dat after me." She then clasped the little boy"s hands, bade him raise his eyes to heaven, and made him repeat what she had said, ending it with "I swear dis, to my great G.o.d."
There was such an affecting solemnity in this action, and in the mulatto such a determined enthusiasm of manner incapable of being controlled, that Adeline, Glenmurray, and Berrendale observed what pa.s.sed in respectful silence: and when it was over, Glenmurray said, in a voice of emotion, "I think, Adeline, we must accept this good creature"s offer; and as nurse grows lazy and saucy, we had better part with her: and as for your young knight there," (the tawny boy had by this time nestled himself close to Adeline, who, with no small emotion, was playing with his woolly curls,) "we must send him to school; for, my good woman, we are not so poor as you imagine."
"G.o.d be thanked!" cried the mulatto.
"But what is your name?"
"I was christened Savanna," replied she.
"Then, good Savanna," cried Adeline, "I hope we shall both have reason to bless the day when first we met; and to-morrow you shall come home to us." Savanna, on hearing this, almost screamed with joy, and as she took her leave Berrendale slipped a guinea into her hand: the tawny boy meanwhile slowly followed his mother, as if unwilling to leave Adeline, even though she gave him halfpence to spend in cakes: but on being told that she would let him come again the next day, he tripped gaily down after Savanna.
The quiet of the chamber being then restored, Glenmurray fell into a calm slumber. Adeline took up her work; and Berrendale, pretending to read, continued to feed his pa.s.sion by gazing on the unconscious Adeline.
While they were thus engaged, Glenmurray, un.o.bserved, awoke; and he soon guessed how Berrendale"s eyes were employed, as the book which he held in his hand was upside down; and through the fingers of the hand which he held before his face, he saw his looks fixed on Adeline.
The moment was a favourable one for Glenmurray"s purpose: and just as he raised himself from his pillow, Adeline had discovered the earnest gaze of Berrendale; and a suspicion of the truth that instant darting across her mind, disconcerted and blushing, she had cast her eyes on the ground.
"That is an interesting study which you are engaged in, Charles," cried Glenmurray smiling.
Berrendale started; and, deeply blushing, faltered out, "Yes."
Adeline looked at Glenmurray, and seeing a very arch and meaning expression on his countenance, suspected that he had made the same discovery as herself: yet, if so, she wondered at his looking so pleasantly on Berrendale as he spoke.
"It is a book, Charles," continued Glenmurray, "which the more you study the more you will admire; and I wish to give you a clue to understand some pa.s.sages in it better than you can now do."
This speech deceived Adeline, and made her suppose that Glenmurray really alluded to the book which lay before Berrendale: but it convinced _him_ that Glenmurray spoke metaphorically; and as his manner was kind, it also made him think that he saw and did not disapprove his attachment.
For a few minutes, each of them being engrossed in different contemplations, there was a complete silence; but Glenmurray interrupted it by saying, "My dear Adeline, it is your hour for walking; but, as I am not disposed to sleep again, will you forgive me if I keep your walking companion to myself to-day?--I wish to converse with him alone."
"Oh! most cheerfully," she replied with quickness: "you know I love a solitary ramble of all things."
"Not very flattering that to my cousin," observed Glenmurray.
"I did not wish to flatter him," said Adeline gravely; and Berrendale, fluttered at the idea of the coming conversation with Glenmurray, and mortified by Adeline"s words and manner, turned to the window to conceal his emotion.
Adeline, then, with more than usual tenderness, conjured Glenmurray not to talk too much, nor do anything to destroy the hopes on which her only chance of happiness depended, viz. the now possible chance of his recovery, and then set out for her walk; while, with a restraint and coldness which she could not conquer, she bade Berrendale farewell for the present.
The walk was long, and her thoughts perturbed:--"What could Glenmurray want to say to Mr Berrendale?"--"Why did Mr Berrendale sit with his eyes so intently and clandestinely, as it were, fixed on me?" were thoughts perpetually recurring to her: and half impatient, and half reluctant, she at length returned to her lodgings.
When she entered the apartment, she saw signs of great emotion in the countenance of both the gentlemen; and in Berrendale"s eyes the traces of recent tears. The tone of Glenmurray"s voice too, when he addressed her, was even more tender than usual, and Berrendale"s attentions more marked, yet more respectful; and Adeline observed that Glenmurray was unusually thoughtful and absent, and that the cough and other symptoms of his complaint were more troublesome than ever.
"I see you have exerted yourself and talked too much during my absence,"
cried Adeline, "and I will never leave you again for so long a time."
"You never shall," said Glenmurray. "I must leave _you_ for so long a time at last, that I will be blessed with the sight of you as long as I can."
Adeline whose hopes had been considerably revived during the last few days, looked mournfully and reproachfully in his face as he uttered these words.
"It is even so, my dearest girl," continued Glenmurray, "and I say this to guard you against a melancholy surprise:--I wish to prepare you for an event which to me seems unavoidable."
"Prepare me!" exclaimed Adeline wildly. "Can there be any preparation to enable one to bear such a calamity? Absurd idea! However, I shall derive consolation from the severity of the stroke: I feel that I shall not be able to survive it." So saying, her head fell on Glenmurray"s pillow; and for some time, her sorrow almost suspended the consciousness of suffering.
From this state she was aroused by Glenmurray"s being attacked with a violent paroxysm of his complaint, and all selfish distress was lost in the consciousness of his sufferings: again he struggled through, and seemed so relieved by the effort, that again Adeline"s hopes revived; and she could scarcely return, with temper, Berrendale"s "good night,"
when Glenmurray expressed a wish to rest, because his spirits had not risen in any proportion to hers.
The nurse had been dismissed that afternoon; and Adeline, as Savanna was not to come home till the next morning, was to sit up alone with Glenmurray that night; and, contrary to his usual custom, he did not insist that she should have a companion.
For a few hours his exhausted frame was recruited by a sleep more than usually quiet, and but for a few hours only. He then became restless, and so wakeful and disturbed, that he professed to Adeline an utter inability to sleep, and therefore he wished to pa.s.s the rest of the night in serious conversation with her.
Adeline, alarmed at this intention, conjured him not to irritate his complaint by so dangerous an exertion.
"My mind will irritate it more," replied he, "if I refrain from it; for it is burthened, my Adeline, and it longs to throw off its burthen. Now, then, ere my senses wander, hear what I wish to communicate to you, and interrupt me as little as possible."
Adeline, oppressed and awed beyond measure at the unusual solemnity of his manner, made no answer; but, leaning her cheek on his hand, awaited his communication in silence.
"I think," said Glenmurray, "I shall begin with telling you Berrendale"s history; it is proper that you should know all that concerns him."
Adeline raising her head, replied hastily,--"Not to satisfy any curiosity of mine; for I feel none, I a.s.sure you."
"Well, then," returned Glenmurray, sighing, "to please me, be it.--Berrendale is the son of my mother"s sister, by a merchant of the neighbourhood of the "Change, who hurt the family pride so much by marrying a tradesman, that I am the only one of the clan who has noticed her since. He ran away, about four years ago, with the only child of a rich West Indian from a boarding-school. The consequence was, that her father renounced her; but, when, three years ago, she died in giving birth to a son, the unhappy parent repented of his displeasure, and offered to allow Berrendale, who from the bankruptcy and sudden death of both his parents had been left dest.i.tute, an annuity of 300_l._ for life, provided he would send the child over to Jamaica, and allow him to have all the care of his education. To this Berrendale consented."
"Reluctantly, I hope," said Adeline, "and merely out of pity for the feelings of the childless father."
"I hope so too," continued Glenmurray; "for I do not think the chance of inheriting all his grandfather"s property a sufficient reason to lead him to give up to another, and in a foreign land too, the society and education of his child: but, whatever were his reasons, Berrendale acceded to the request, and the infant was sent to Jamaica; and ever since the 300_l._ has been regularly remitted to him: besides that, he has recovered two thousand and odd hundred pounds from the wreck of his father"s property; and with economy, and had he a good wife to manage his affairs for him, Berrendale might live very comfortably."
"My dear Glenmurray," cried Adeline impatiently, "what is this to me? and why do you weary yourself to tell me particulars so little interesting to me?"
Glenmurray bade her have patience, and continued thus: "And now, Adeline," (here his voice evidently faltered,) "I must open my whole heart to you, and confess that the idea of leaving you friendless, unprotected, and poor, your reputation injured, and your peace of mind destroyed, is more than I am able to bear, and will give me, in my last moments, the torments of the d.a.m.ned." Here a violent burst of tears interrupted him; and Adeline, overcome with emotion and surprise at the sight of the agitation which his own sufferings could never occasion in him, hung over him in speechless woe.
"Besides," continued Glenmurray, recovering himself a little, "I--O Adeline!" seizing her cold hand, "can you forgive me for having been the means of blasting all your fair fame and prospects in life?"
"For the sake of justice, if not of mercy," exclaimed Adeline, "forbear thus cruelly to accuse yourself. You know that from my own free, unbia.s.sed choice I gave myself to you, and in compliance with my own principles."
"But who taught you those principles?--who led you to a train of reasoning, so alluring in theory, so pernicious in practice? Had not I, with the heedless vanity of youth, given to the world the crude conceptions of four-and-twenty, you might at this moment have been the idol of a respectable society; and I, equally respected, have been the husband of your heart; while happiness would perhaps have kept the fatal disease at bay, of which anxiety has facilitated the approach."
He was going on: but Adeline, who had till now struggled successfully with her feelings, wound up almost to phrensy at the possibility that anxiety had shortened Glenmurray"s life, gave way to a violent paroxysm of sorrow, which, for a while, deprived her of consciousness; and when she recovered she found Berrendale bending over her, while her head lay on Glenmurray"s pillow.
The sight of Berrendale in a moment roused her to exertion:--his look was so full of anxious tenderness, and she was at that moment so ill disposed to regard it with complacency, that she eagerly declared she was quite recovered, and begged Mr Berrendale would return to bed; and Glenmurray seconding her request, with a deep sigh he departed.
"Poor fellow!" said Glenmurray, "I wish you had seen his anxiety during your illness!"
"I am glad I did _not_," replied Adeline: "but how can you persist in talking to me of any other person"s anxiety, when I am tortured with yours? Your conversation of to-night has made me even more miserable than I was before. By what strange fatality do you blame yourself for the conduct worthy of admiration?--for giving to the world, as soon as produced, opinions which were calculated to enlighten it?"
"But," replied Glenmurray, "as those opinions militated against the experience and custom of ages, ought I not to have paused before I published, and kept them back till they had received the sanction of my maturer judgment?"