These were the reasons that I hadn"t told anyone about what had happened at the club, or about me seeing any doctor. They just carried on believing that I was still working in the VIP area and they had not seen any change in me. And I wanted to keep it that way. This wasn"t too difficult as sometimes people become so absorbed in their own happiness that they fail to see the truth behind a lie. It wasn"t that I thought they wouldn"t understand but I had felt so guilty from the last time I was broken that I never wanted anyone to look at me like that again. I lied to those who I couldn"t hide it from, like RJ and Jack, because they were going to see me at the club working downstairs. I told them that they didn"t need me anymore as the girl that I replaced was now back. This of course wasn"t a complete lie as they didn"t need me any more.....well painfully more like he didn"t need me anymore.
Jack had been great, a true friend, whereas RJ didn"t let it drop for a while, as every time I saw her she would bring it up. Jack thankfully intervened one night when we were at the club and my shift had finished.
"RJ give it a rest, can"t you see she"s sick of talking about it!" He said fighting my corner.
"Well I just don"t get it!"
"No surprises there!" Jack said being sarcastic. RJ hooked out an ice cube from her gla.s.s and threw it in his direction only it missed him and hit some poor girl that was innocently walking past. The girl turned to see who had been the culprit and RJ pointed to Jack keeping a straight face. As soon as the girl saw Jack"s handsome, Brad Pitt look she smiled as if throwing an ice cube at her was a good thing. I couldn"t help but laugh. I mean ok it was cute when you were about ten. A boy that fancied you would then throw stuff to get your attention but in your twenties it was a bit pathetic! Even so, Jack got away with it even though it had been RJ"s doing.
"Hey bro, I think you"re in there, why don"t you ask her to the Halloween Gig?" She said not even lowering her voice. The Halloween Gig was held here at the club, where lots of bands were going to compete. It was a huge night that happened each year and the Goth scene loved it.
"Yeah thanks, but I will pa.s.s, b.u.t.t munch!" He said playfully. They were just so different you forgot that they were even related. I left early that night but Jack walked me to my car. I was so relaxed around him that it didn"t seem out of character when he would flirt. Consequently, when he put his arm around me as we walked out of the club I didn"t give it much thought why people were staring. I guess we looked like a couple but because I had made it clear on my "not dating" rule, Jack hadn"t asked me out again. I just gathered he had got the message. So when he stopped me from getting in my car I was confused.
"Kaz, I"ve been meaning to ask you something but well I guess that you were going through a tough time regarding why you left the VIP....Not that I want to pry." He said as I realised he knew the reason I had given, had been a lie. Was Jack the only one that really knew me?
"It"s none of my business and I get why you wouldn"t want to talk about it...trust me, I know how it feels... more than you think." He said this with sadness in his eyes and I knew that his feelings ran deeper than I realised. He was talking about what happened at the club.
"Jack, you know if you ever want to talk then I"m here, ok. I too don"t want to pry but if you ever need anyone, then I"m a better listener than a talker." We both laughed lightly trying to change the glum mood.
"I know, you"re a good friend but I..." He wanted to continue but he couldn"t find the words which I now understood he wanted to say. So I did something so out of character that I shocked myself when the question came out.
"Jack will you go to the Halloween gig with me?" His face dropped in amazement, as this was the last thing he had been expecting.
"You want to go with me?" He said checking he had heard it right.
"Yeah, but hey I understand if you are going with someone else," I said now, worrying that I had it all wrong.
"h.e.l.l no, I was going to ask you all along but I"ve been waiting for the right time" he said with the biggest smile across his face.
"But hey, won"t you be working?"
"No I have been given the night off so I"m free as a bird." And this was true, for some strange reason creepy Gary had told me that I wasn"t needed, even though it was going to be one of the busiest nights of the year! I didn"t understand it but I wasn"t going to argue, although I did double check it with his brother Jerry, just in case.
"So you will be my bird for the night?" He teased going back to his usual flirty ways. I smirked at him. I left the car park after arranging times for Sat.u.r.day night"s date with mixed feelings. Was that the best idea, going on a date with Jack? I mean of course I liked him, who in their right mind wouldn"t? But I couldn"t help the fear that I was betraying my own feelings. I clearly was not over Draven but thinking about it, would I ever be? Of course that didn"t mean I had to live my life as a nun! I had to move on and even though I was now sleeping again and wasn"t living my life as a zombie, I still wasn"t whole.
By the time I got home I decided that what I had done was for the best. I needed to live my life, not shy away from it. I would now embrace every opportunity and tomorrow night would be my first show of this and one thing was for sure, I was going to dress for the occasion! I was going to knock Jack"s socks off...well at least try.
When I got in I was glad when I saw Libby was still awake because there was something important I needed her help with and this was one request that I knew she would most definitely enjoy.
"Hey Lib"s I"ve got a huge favour to ask." She raised her head round from leaning it against Frank as they were watching some action movie. I think she had even fallen asleep.
"Yeah what"s up?"
"Well, don"t go all weird or anything but I kind of have a date tomorrow night and well, I need help with a costume." As soon as I said the magic word "date" she was now wide awake and even Frank was looking at me and leaving Van Damme to his kick boxing.
"Oh, yeah definitely, of course I will but I have to ask...who with?" She said as she was out of her seat coming to face me.
"It"s Jack."
"But I thought you"ve been turning him down ever since you got here?"
"Well yeah, but I sort of asked him." She and Frank shot each other a look as if they thought I had been taken over by pod people.
"Ok...umm... so one other thing, what are you going as?" She said trying to keep the grin to a minimum.
"It"s kind of just the usual Gothic theme," I said as she followed me into the kitchen. But as soon as I had said the words, she had clapped her hands scaring me into looking back at her.
"Is that a good thing?" I said and I could almost see the cogs turning in her head.
"Oh yes, I have just the thing, but I think I will need to change a few things." She said but I wasn"t even sure if she was talking to me or herself.
"Why, what are you thinking?" I asked hoping I wouldn"t regret it this time tomorrow night.
"Well...I have this old costume from when me and Frank went to this fancy dress party last year, it was a medieval theme and I have this black and purple dress with a corset top." Forget about tomorrow night, I was regretting it now!
"Oh no, no corsets!"
"Oh come on, you will look great, and plus if you dress the way you always do, that"s not the point of Halloween."
"And what is exactly?" I asked with my arms folded.
"It"s the one night that you can get away with being someone else. It wouldn"t be you dressing up... it will be the Halloween you!"
"That makes absolutely no sense, you know that.... right?" She shook her head at me.
"Look, what do you think other people will be wearing? You hate standing out right? And I guarantee that if you don"t dress up as a s.e.xy Goth then you will be the only one who doesn"t." What she said in a crazy way made sense. If I went as I usually dress then I would get stared at for being even more of an outsider. So I gave in and agreed, she had free rein to do whatever she wanted. Which I found out also included makeup and hair. I knew I was making a categorical mistake but she was just so happy with the idea of playing "dress up" that I couldn"t crush her enthusiasm.
It was Sat.u.r.day the next day so Libby would have all day to work on it and if there was one thing Libby loved more than dressing up, it was planning for it. She even got Frank to get out her sewing machine from in the bas.e.m.e.nt. Libby hated going down there and it was mainly Frank that used it to workout. She also asked him to bring up a ma.s.sive trunk that looked as though it could have been a comfortable coffin for a corpse. Poor Frank was trying to watch his film but kept having to get up to do Libby"s bidding. It made me laugh because when Libby"s back was turned he would bow like a servant or salute like a solider. I giggled and Libby shot me a look as though she knew he was doing something but the fear of being caught making fun of his wife was enough to get him running down the stairs.
The next day was all hands on deck as far as Libby was concerned, bringing me tea in the morning, waking me up a lot earlier than I would have liked. She marched me into the bathroom and ordered me to shower. When I started to complain that I was hungry she pa.s.sed me the soap and said, "Here eat this." And closed the door leaving me to shower. Once I was inside the cubical I heard a tapping at the door and had to turn off the water to hear who it was.
"What!" I said shouting through the gla.s.s and bathroom door.
"Use the stuff I put in there for you." Libby shouted back through the wooden door as I shivered now the hot water had stopped warming my skin.
"OK!" I shouted back and continued to shower with the new products that smelled like pa.s.sion fruit and felt like cream covering my body. It had little seeds in it that exfoliated my skin making it feel soft when I got out and dried myself.
Libby dried my hair while I sat there and ate breakfast and Frank walked past on his way out saying, "Have fun ladies." I tried to turn to say bye but Libby pulled my head back round with my hair and I complained.
"Oww ...G.o.d Lib"s don"t go into the Beauty business will you?"
"And why not?" She asked hands on hips, brush still in hand.
"Because I don"t want you to get sued!"
"Shut up!" She said in a playful manner that made me smile. Once she"d finished drying my hair she put it in huge curlers until I looked as if I could pick up a radio station.
"What are these for, I"m not wearing my hair down."
"I know, but when I put it up I want the ends curly, anyway don"t you trust me?"
My answer in my head wasn"t the one I gave.
"Of course I do but..."
"No buts, leave a master to work please," she said waving the comb round as if it was her magic wand.
After my hair was done I was allowed to leave the torture chamber which was better known as the kitchen and do what I wanted while she worked on my Gothic attire. She had already taken my measurements, which weren"t far out from her own and lucky for me she had the same shoe size so I could borrow some from hers as all my wardrobe held these days were sneakers, known to me as trainers and a pair of boring black work shoes that were flat!
To be honest I didn"t have the most productive day, as it was hard to do anything with what felt like a transmitter on my head. The day went by surprisingly quickly and after having my nails done and my eyebrows shaped, I was ready for my make-up. I felt like a big kid"s doll as Libby was clearly loving every minute of it. She spent what seemed like ages doing my make-up and my face started to ache from holding it so still.
"What time is Jacky boy picking you up?" She asked as she was applying powder to my pale cheeks.
"We said about eightish... why?" I said in a worried tone "No reason, just wanted to know how much time I had."
"Lib"s it only six."
"Yeah, but I still have to do your hair and then we have to get you into your dress," She said, starting on my eyes. I still hadn"t seen the dress as she wanted it to be a surprise, but I knew her true motives behind it were so it would be too late for me to back out of wearing it. She also wouldn"t let me look in the mirror once my make up and hair were done. She hadn"t left out a thing, from curling my eyelashes to matching the hair clip with the colour of the dress, which she"d told me was purple and black. The colour purple started to bring back memories but I quickly pushed them to the back of my mind where Draven was locked up tightly. This was one night that I wasn"t going to think about him, I made myself that promise.
When everything was done I only just had enough time to get into my dress as Jack was now sat downstairs with Frank and from what it sounded, they were both watching a game. Libby had timed it to a tee as when I finally had been strapped into my dress I only had enough time for a quick look in the mirror.
I was speechless...I was completely blown away and Libby looked at me with near tears in her eyes and her hands covering her mouth waiting for me to speak. I could barely believe it was still me...I looked...well... s.e.xy!
I was wearing a tight fitted corset that looked as though it had been moulded to my skin as the black and purple velvet material snaked around my frame making it curve in all the right places. It was tied with a thick purple ribbon that went all the way down my back touching the cheeks of my behind and to the top part on the skirt. The skirt carried on the design twisting to the front of my leg where a big slit ran up exposing my thigh.
The rest of the skirt ripped down in layers, some bits nearly reaching the floor and others in a net material that gave the skirt body. It moved gracefully around with me when I turned in the mirror. I had been conned into wearing knee high black leather boots with a tall heel but it wasn"t as hard to walk in them as I would have thought. One leg was completely on show while the other was hidden under the multiple layers of black. But this wasn"t the part I was most worried about. No, because the stiff boned corset was creating an eyeful of bust that I usually concealed. I had already put the gloves on before Libby helped me into my dress. They were purple velvet to match and they went up all the way past the elbow, which I was more than happy about.
After dragging my eyes away from my dress I looked at my face seeing someone different staring back at me. I was still pale but my skin looked like it was made from porcelain with a hint of a blush at my cheeks. At this point I didn"t know whether that was from the make-up or my reaction to seeing myself like this. My eyes were dark and smoky with a long black line across the eyelid that followed down and flicked out at the end. They were black underneath also giving them a dark and mysterious look. They were framed with long curly lashes that tickled the tops of my eyelids. I licked my lips but the dark red colour remained making them look full and like a cupids bow. My hair was a soft gold and lighter streaks were caught in the light making them look like silk. It was swept back into a high twist, which overflowed with curls hanging down to my neck. My shorter bits hung down curling around the shape of my face.
"I don"t know what to say...." I said very quietly but she just held the biggest grin.
"You don"t need to say anything... and well, you don"t have time to." She was right, as now it was time for the hard part, now I had to face people...
Like this!
Chapter 30- To be noticed.
Libby checked me once last time, fluffing my skirt out and then remembering something, she came at my neck with a red lip liner.
"What"s that for?" I asked as she was coming closer to my neck.
"Well if anyone asks what you are you can say "A Victim", see!" She said turning me to face the mirror again pointing out the two red dots on my neck she had just put there.
Great! Well, that just gave me images of a certain dark someone pinning me down and biting on my neck, putting those marks there for real.
I grabbed my long black jacket and zipped it up before going downstairs.
"What are you doing?" Libby asked protesting.
"I don"t want Frank to see me like this...don"t worry I will be taking it off in the club," I said nudging her as she looked hurt so I added, "Thanks Lib"s, it"s amazing." And I soon had her smiling again. I transferred my purse out of my bag into my deep jacket pocket and Libby added some red lip-gloss in there as well.
"Just in case," she said making kiss noises like she was five. I couldn"t refrain from rolling my eyes.
I walked downstairs with more than b.u.t.terflies in my stomach. It felt more like giant beetles! Jack and Frank were sat in the lounge getting animated about the game. But they both turned when Libby cleared her throat. Jack"s mouth actually dropped and Frank looked as though I was someone else. No one said anything, they just kept staring at me, which didn"t go down too well with Libby.
"Well, what do you think?" She said speaking for me. Jack was the first to find words.
"Oh, wow, you look....I mean you look, great, amazing...just wow." He said and I blushed, Frank on the other hand nudged him as they were both now standing and whispered to him, "Smooth...real smooth." And I giggled like a teenager.
"Thanks, but shouldn"t we go?" I replied, making my way to the door.
"Yeah Kazzy, you look fantastic, good job Libs...hey you kids have fun tonight!" Frank shouted to us on our way out of the door.
I was so full of mixed emotions but embarra.s.sment was definitely the big winner. I only noticed what Jack was wearing in the car. He was dressed in a long black leather jacket with ripped jeans and ripped T shirt with fake blood on it. He had white make up over his face and his eyes had thick black around them making him look ill.
"Nice costume but you"re going to have to give me a clue," I said motioning my hand up and down.
"Ha, well naturally I"m a rocker zombie victim...durr" He said making fun at me.
"Ahhh...yeah now I get it, that must have taken you umm... all of five minutes to come up with," I said teasing him back.
"Well we can"t all be as naturally beautiful as you, some have to work hard at greatness...plus this was the only thing I could put together in an hour." I blushed at the first part but laughed at the second.
"Been working today then I gather?"
"Yeah, but I had enough time to buy some fake blood in my break," he said showing me his ripped T-shirt that exposed bits of his toned skin underneath. It wasn"t surprising that Jack had a muscular six pack under all those clothes, it was however, a shock seeing it. I wondered if he noticed my gulp.
It didn"t take long before we were queuing to get in as tonight was definitely going to be packed inside. There were lots of Goths but also some actual costumes, the usual devils, witches, black cats and loads of zombies.
"Oh look Jack, it looks like only a few hundred people copied your idea," I teased again. We got inside and I knew it was time to remove my jacket but I was just so nervous I was still clutching on to my collar. It did however bring me comfort to see that Libby had been right. Everyone was dressed up and I doubted anyone would notice me. I also couldn"t help where my eyes seemed to be drawn, as I looked up to the VIP area. There I saw a tall black figure standing at the edge of the top floor balcony. I couldn"t make out any features but there was just something in me that knew it was him. This was enough to give me the guts to remove the black fabric that was hiding away my body.
As soon as I did I regretted it as now everyone was staring at me including Jack. Even weirder the lights above seem to flicker as though searching for some more power. What was that all about?
"Oh my G.o.d Keira, you look...I mean you really....wow." Again it didn"t make much sense but it was sweet all the same.
"Thanks Jack, come on let"s get a drink." I said linking my arm in his as we made our way through the crowd towards the bar. Once there I was about to get out my money when Jack stopped me saying, "Hey gorgeous, first round"s on me!" And with that he flagged down Mike, who didn"t even recognise me.
"Keira...is that...no way, you look great," he said and Jack rolled his eyes at Mike"s attempt at a compliment, personally I found it nice but I was starting to get burning cheeks from all the attention. I was going to have to get a few drinks down me for some liquid courage.
"What can I get you?"
"I will have a c.o.ke and the lady will have a shot of tequila and a Corona." He said without having to ask me. He really did know me well. I downed my shot and swigged back my beer tasting the lime around the neck. It was as if I could feel myself relax with every taste.