"Are you going to Shannon"s, too?"
"That"s enough, Gi," her father snapped. "Stop being a smart-a.s.s."
She scowled, but she didn"t have the nerve to talk back to him like she did her mom because it made him crazy, and she"d only just gotten her telephone privileges back.
Her mom didn"t say much for the rest of the dinner, which was unusual, because usually when her dad showed up to eat, she tried extra hard to be entertaining, being all chirpy and offering stimulating topics of conversation and everything. Tonight, though, she didn"t even seem to be paying attention, and Gigi wondered if it had anything to do with the fact that She Who Must Not Be Named had come back to town.
It made her mad that they still hadn"t said anything. Gigi"d had to hear the news from Chelsea, who heard it from her mom. Gigi"s parents acted like she was still a child, but everybody knew that Nana Sabrina hadn"t married Mom"s dad, Griffin Carey, until Mom was a senior in high school, and he"d had this other family, and, like, who cared? Although Gigi had to admit she was very, very curious.
The phone rang, and she made a dash for it because she knew it"d be Chelsea. "Can I be excused?"
She waited for her mom to say no like she always did, but she didn"t, so Gigi grabbed the phone and raced upstairs. Everything was too weird tonight.
Winnie watched Gigi disappear and wondered what had happened to the little girl who used to love just being with her. This time last year, Gigi had rushed in from school, so eager to share the news of the day that she"d stuttered over her words.
Ryan gazed toward the door. "I wish you didn"t let her hang around with Chelsea so much. That kid looks like an ad for kiddie p.o.r.n."
Winnie balled her fist in her lap, but she kept her voice calm. "Exactly how do you expect me to stop her?"
He sighed. "Sorry. Frustration. I keep thinkin" she"s going to snap out of it, and we"ll have our daughter back."
She and Ryan hardly ever spoke harshly to each other. They disagreed, but in more than thirteen years of marriage, they"d never done more than exchange a few chilly silences. She didn"t know how couples like Merylinn and Deke could stand it. During one of their fights, Deke had punched a hole in the garage wall, and they"d actually told people about it.
"I couldn"t punch her," Deke had said, and Merylinn had laughed.
Winnie didn"t think she could tolerate that kind of strain.
Ryan leaned back in his chair. "She looks like a street kid in those clothes."
Something else that was her fault. Today Gigi"d worn that awful shirt she"d insisted on getting at the Salvation Army Thrift Shop. Winnie should have known Gigi"s pricey wardrobe would eventually make her a target and backed off, but she"d wanted her daughter to feel good about herself, and she"d waited too long.
Winnie tossed her napkin on the table. "You"ll have to talk to her about it this time. She hates me enough as it is."
How had it come to this? Winnie wondered. She"d been so determined to be the kind of mother to Gigi that she"d wanted so badly for herself when she was growing up. Sabrina had done her best, Winnie supposed, but her mother"s economic survival had depended on Griffin Carey"s goodwill, and Sabrina had devoted all her energy to his comfort, leaving nothing for an emotionally needy daughter. Sabrina had hated Diddie Carey with a pa.s.sion, and knowing that Diddie had given birth to the dazzling Sugar Beth, while Sabrina had born such an unimpressive child, galled her. Even the fact that Griffin doted on Winnie hadn"t eased her anxiety. Sabrina understood her lover"s fundamentally ruthless nature and kept waiting for him to transfer his affections to his legitimate daughter. But he never had, and Winnie missed him to this day.
"Gigi doesn"t hate you," Ryan said. "She"s just being a teenager."
"It"s more than that. I"d like to smack those girls for turning against her last summer. It was simple jealousy."
"Gigi played into their hands. She"ll work through it."
Despite his words, Winnie knew he was as worried as she. She rose and began carrying the dishes to the sink. "I only have ice cream for dessert."
"Maybe later." Ryan wasn"t particular about food. Half the time he didn"t remember to eat, which was why he stayed so lean, while she had to watch every bite.
She needed to tell him about Sugar Beth coming into the shop. Otherwise, she"d be giving it too much importance. But as she tried to frame the words, the winegla.s.s she"d been rinsing slipped in her fingers and broke in the sink.
"You okay?" He rose and came toward her. She wanted him to wrap his arms around her, but he studied the mess instead.
"I"m fine. Why don"t you make coffee while I clean this up?"
As she tossed the bigger pieces of gla.s.s in the trash, she wondered why she didn"t feel more satisfaction about today. The years had taken their toll on Sugar Beth, and for the first time in their lives, Winnie had come out ahead.
She"d begun to bloom her senior year in high school after Sugar Beth and Ryan had left for college. She"d stopped overeating and found the courage to have her hair cut. Inside, she might have been the same awkward teenager, but outside she began to move with a new a.s.surance that only grew more p.r.o.nounced after Griffin and Sabrina"s marriage. Suddenly, she was the rich girl who lived at Frenchman"s Bride.
Winnie"s fingers crept to the pearls on her throat. The stricken expression on Sugar Beth"s face had been the culmination of every revenge fantasy she"d ever entertained. She should have enjoyed it more.
The past wove its way through the sound of the furnace clicking on and the smell of the coffee beans Ryan was grinding. She was sixteen again, taking a shortcut through the gym when she"d tripped and her algebra notebook had fallen open at Sugar Beth"s feet.
"Give it back!" Winnie"s voice, high and shrill, had bounced off the gym rafters. But Sugar Beth had only stepped higher on the bleachers, the algebra notebook open in her hands. Tall and willowy, blond and beautiful, Sugar Beth had been evil all the way to the bottom of her heart.
"Listen up, y"all. Winnie"s been doin" a lot more than solving problems in advanced algebra."
The Seawillows abandoned their chatter. Winnie"s heart was pounding so fast she was afraid it would burst. "Sugar Beth, I"m warning you..."
But Sugar Beth just smiled and took another step up into the bleachers. Winnie started after her, but her sneaker caught on the seat. She winced as she stumbled. "Give it to me."
Sugar Beth smirked. "I don"t know why you"re getting so uptight. It"s just girls."
Amy touched the gold cross at her neck. "Maybe you shouldn"t read it if Winnie doesn"t want you to."
Sugar Beth ignored her. "Y"all aren"t going to believe this."
Winnie blinked furiously against her tears. Just once she"d like to be able to defend herself, but Sugar Beth was too powerful. "That"s private. Give it back right now."
"Oh, don"t be so immature." The gold hoops at Sugar Beth"s ears flashed as she flipped her perfect mane of hair. Then she began to read. "He looked at my naked nipples."
The girls laughed, even Amy, although she touched her cross again. Sweat soaked through the underarms of Winnie"s blouse. She"d started writing her fantasies a few months earlier in a special notebook that she kept hidden in the back of her closet, but today in study hall she"d gotten careless. "Stop it, Sugar Beth."
"No, don"t stop!" Leeann blasted her bangs with the Aqua Net she kept in her purse, but her eyes stayed glued to Sugar Beth.
Sugar Beth propped one of her metallic flats on the bleacher in front of her. "Next, he slipped his broad, strong hand into my tiny lace panties." The way Sugar Beth emphasized the word tiny served as a not so subtle reminder that Winnie"s panties weren"t all that small. "I moved my legs farther apart."
Winnie could never come back to Parrish High.
"He slid his other hand up the inside of my leg..." Sugar Beth"s blue eyes widened in fake shock. "Why, Winnie Davis, this is p.o.r.nography."
"I like it." Leeann popped a bubble.
Sugar Beth turned the page. " "I love you, Winnie, with all my abid-ing pa.s.sion." " She paused, and her eyes raced down over the words, looking for more ammunition to destroy Winnie. It didn"t take her long to find it.
"OhmiG.o.d, y"all listen to this. "I spread my legs even farther as his strong fingers started to tiddle me. I gasped out his name..." "
Winnie"s ears rang, and the gym began to spin. She made a soft, helpless sound.
" "Oh, my darling, darling-" Ryan!"
Winnie"s blood froze.
"Hey, Sugar Beth. What"re you guys doin"?"
Ryan Galantine was coming toward them from the back of the gym, with Deke Jasper and Bobby Jarrow, the three of them in their letter jackets because there was a game that night. Winnie only saw Ryan-tall, blond, and golden, the object of all her fantasies. Horrified, she watched him climb the bleachers.
"Hey, Sugar, I thought you had a meeting."
"I"m gettin" there. I"ve been reading something Winnie wrote. It"s really good."
"Yeah?" He kissed her, ignoring the school"s policy on P.D.A., then looked down at Winnie and gave her the leftover crumbs of his smile. "I want to hear, too."
Winnie would have to run away from Parrish forever, but as she stepped back, her foot slipped on the bleachers and she fell in an awkward tangle, her hips wedged between the rows of seats.
"Stop it," Amy said, but like the others, she was a little afraid of Sugar Beth, and she didn"t speak with much authority.
"No, keep reading. I want to hear more." Leeann popped another bubble.
Sugar Beth"s eyes flicked over Winnie, then returned to the notebook page. "Should I go back to the naked nipples or the tiny panties?"
Ryan laughed and draped a proprietary arm around Sugar Beth"s shoulders. "Hey, this sounds good."
Sugar Beth looked down at Winnie, her voice syrupy with bad intention. "Or maybe I should start where she calls out her lover"s name?"
Winnie was going to throw up.
"Yes, why don"t I start there. "Oh, my darling..." "
"That"s quite enough, Sugar Beth." They all whirled around at the sound of a clipped British accent. Winnie struggled to her feet and watched as Mr. Byrne, her favorite teacher, walked toward the bleachers. He was wearing a gray-and-white-striped vest today over his old black turtleneck, and he had his long hair tied back in a low ponytail.
Even though he was the youngest teacher in the school, almost everybody was afraid of him because he could be so sarcastic. But the kids respected him, too. He didn"t show movies in cla.s.s, and he expected everybody to work hard. Winnie adored him. He was never sarcastic with her, and he even gave her some of his own books to read because he said she needed to broaden her horizons.
Sugar Beth didn"t look worried or nervous like the other kids would have. Instead, she stared him right in the eye. "Hey, Mr. Byrne. We"re just goofin" off. Isn"t that right, Winnie?"
Winnie couldn"t make her lips move. She couldn"t do anything.
"Both of you come with me."
"I have a meeting right now, Mr. Byrne," Sugar Beth said, all sweet and polite. "Homecoming court. Are you going to be in your room in about an hour?" She sounded exactly like Diddie, who was famous for scheduling the school board meetings around her favorite TV shows.
None of the other teachers ever stood up to Sugar Beth because they didn"t want to get on Diddie"s bad side, but Mr. Byrne still hadn"t figured out how important Diddie was. "I don"t really care what you have planned."
Sugar Beth shrugged and pa.s.sed the notebook to Ryan.
"I"ll take that," Mr. Byrne said.
Winnie"s heart stuck in her throat as Ryan handed it back. First Winnie had been humiliated in front of her cla.s.smates, and now even Mr. Byrne would know what a pervert she was. As for Ryan...She could never look at him again.
Sugar Beth skipped down the bleachers with the notebook. Winnie couldn"t swallow as she watched it pa.s.s from her hand to his.
The buff-colored walls closed in on her as they made their way from the gym to Mr. Byrne"s cla.s.sroom. Sugar Beth chattered away, not seeming to care that he wasn"t answering back. Winnie trailed behind, her feet dragging.
When they reached the door of his cla.s.sroom, Mr. Byrne stopped. Winnie stared down at the ugly brown tile floor. He was wearing the old black loafers he always kept polished.
"I believe this is yours, Winnie."
She looked up at him through her misery and saw the familiar haughtiness in his eyes, along with a kindness no one except her ever seemed to notice. He held out her notebook.
She couldn"t believe he was returning it, and her hand shook as she took it. "T-thank you."
Sugar Beth gave a light little laugh. "Mr. Byrne, you should read what Winnie wrote first. Everybody knows how smart she is, but I"ll bet you didn"t know that she"s so creative."
"I"ll see you in cla.s.s tomorrow, Winnie," he said without looking at Sugar Beth. "And I"ll expect you to have something scintillating to offer about that dreary Hester Prynne."
She gave a jerky nod and pulled the notebook to her chest. Just before she turned away, she caught a glimpse of Sugar Beth"s face. Her eyes glittered with the old familiar hatred. Winnie knew exactly why it was there. Why it would never go away. Even though Sugar Beth had everything Winnie didn"t-beauty, popularity, self-confidence, and Ryan Galantine-Winnie had the one thing Sugar Beth most desperately wanted.
Their father loved her the best.
Winnie tossed the last of the broken wine goblet in the trash. Her mind skittered toward the other memory from that year, the one that was infinitely more painful than having her s.e.xual fantasies exposed, but even after all this time, she couldn"t think about it. Instead, she gazed at Ryan, all grown up now. He"d turned the cuffs on his light blue dress shirt. She loved his wrists, the way his bones were formed, the strength in them.
She"d been his rebound girlfriend, there to console him the summer after Sugar Beth had dumped him and married Darren Tharp. Although Winnie might not have transformed herself into a swan while he was away at school, she was no longer an ugly duckling, either, and he"d noticed.
s.e.x had been her plan, not his, and he"d almost seemed puzzled when he found himself in bed with her one afternoon while his parents were at work. When she"d realized she was pregnant, she"d been terrified to tell him, but he"d put on his game face and married her. He"d even said he loved her, and she"d pretended to believe him. But she"d known then, just as she knew now, that his love for her was only a pale imitation of what he"d felt for Sugar Beth. To this day, he"d never once looked at Winnie the same way.
She pulled two pottery coffee mugs from the cupboard and set them on the counter. "Do you remember...when Sugar Beth found my notebook in the gym and tried to read it to everybody?"
Ryan stuck his head in the refrigerator. "Is there any more half-and-half?"
"Behind the orange juice. I"d...written a s.e.xual fantasy about the two of us."
"Yeah?" He straightened, the carton of half-and-half in his hand, and smiled at her. "What kind of s.e.xual fantasy?"
"Didn"t she tell you about it?"
"h.e.l.l, I don"t know." His smile vanished. "That was years ago. You"re way too hung up on what happened in high school." He closed the refrigerator door just hard enough to rattle the eighteenth-century tea box sitting on top. "I don"t understand why it still bothers you so much. You ended up with everything. Frenchman"s Bride, a few million in your trust. Even the plant"s going to be yours someday. Why would you waste your time thinkin" about what happened in high school?"
"I don"t."
It was a lie. Her entire adult life had been shaped by those difficult years: her intellect, her painstaking attention to her appearance, even her social conscience.
The coffeemaker gave its final burp, and Ryan pulled out the carafe. As he filled the mugs, she knew she couldn"t put it off any longer. "Sugar Beth came into the store today."
Only a wife would have noticed the tiny pulse that jumped at the corner of his jaw. He filled the mugs, then replaced the carafe and rested his hips against the edge of the counter. "What did she want?"
"Just looking around, I guess. I don"t think she knew it was my shop."
He liked half-and-half in his coffee, but he took a sip without opening the carton. "Parrish is a small town. You were bound to run into her sooner or later."
Winnie began rinsing the dinner plates. "Her sweater was cheap. She looked tired." She might as well have hung out a sign advertising her own insecurities. "But she"s still beautiful. As thin as ever."
He shrugged as if he"d lost interest, but he was still drinking his coffee black. She wanted to change the subject, but she couldn"t think of a single thing to say. Maybe he felt the same way because he set down his mug and let his eyes drift over her. "So tell me about that s.e.xual fantasy."