Alexithymia: The Curse Of Transcendence

Out on the streets, Quarta wore a black hooded jacket, becoming an unrecognizable silhouette that looked like a saturated form of a shadow enveloped by the soft rain, surrounded by city lights as she was on her way to the Head Quarters. Small pellets of water were spitting on her hands as the remainder of the drops quenches the scattered puddles decorating the asphalt and the busy road.

During the day, the city was usually very calm, most of its inhabitants were busy at their jobs, as due to the city policy the majority must sustain the daytime work, which always continues as a nine-hour shift. The only small portion of the jobs involved was allowed to work until late hours and during the night. That kind of city pace made the city roads almost empty during the day and busy at the beginning of the evening. As sunset came, the city would begin to live and swarms by millions of peoples as if it was an anthill.

A chaotic fragrance was spread out around the perfectly clean asphalt streets; the Uprising odor of "Geosmin" quickly filled Nion"s nostrils. Geosmin was a variety of spores that were produced by Streptomyces microbes which particularly dangerous when it is raining as they become active after the long-lasting doze during the dry season.

Ever since the beginning of climate change, the spore volumes grew in number every year, until the scientists across the world had to raise awareness of its existence. Later on Geosmin had been acknowledged as a harmful bacteria that if combusted with others toxic or hazardous chemicals, such as Benzene, Dioxin and other variety of gases that can be found in the air, is an imminent threat to the human body; Specifically dangerous in big cities or industrial areas.

As the countermeasure, the world leaders have issued specifically designed facial masks that must be worn during the rainy periods. Because of the rising volumes of Solar and Longwave radiation mixed with the pollution that was released into the atmosphere, these began to for the "Toxic Gray Shrouds" all around well-developed cities. In the capital, Autumn had changed into a warm winter season as snowflakes melted before even reaching the surface making that particular period specifically toxic for the city inhabitants.

Once through the security gates, Quarta was on her way to the very top of the HQ offices where she had a meeting with the prosper regarding the latest events that occurred at the borderline. At the end of a narrow corridor, she finally arrived at the destination.

The moment when she was about to reach for the door handle. The door briskly opened and almost hit her face. Quinto (The Keepers rang #5) was walking out from the room.

"Tsk!" Said Quinto while leaving the door open behind.

After he pa.s.sed the room entrance, he realized that when he kicked the door, it almost hit Quarta who happened to stand just behind the door.

"Huh? Quarta..." He mumbled.

"Good evening." Said Quarta.

"Do you have a lighter?" Asked Quinto.

"Excuse me?!"

"What you don"t understand? I am asking you if you have a lighter?!" Insisted Quinto.

"Euh...No, I don"t" Replied Quarta.

"Tsk! Useless..." As he said that, Quinto continued walking down the corridor.

"What"s wrong with this guy...?" She mumbled as she headed for the door.

Quarta ignored him and entered the meeting room.

The prosper Aleksithimia is standing against a ma.s.sive open gla.s.s window looking at the city while holding a gla.s.s of scotch.

"My dear sister, I sincerely welcome you. It is always a pleasure to have you here." Said a charming male voice.

The prosper Aleksithimia appeared before his young sister, in all his grandeur. A tailored black suit with a charming black ribbon underneath of which he wore a beautifully designed white shirt that was covered with thin metallic chains that were hanging down over his shoulders.

His chiseled jaw lifted with a proud, pleasant smile. Short dark hair with long wavy curls that looked majestic on him. He possessed dark brown pensive eyes, that one would look for in a poet or dreamed rather than the ruler of millions of people.

He was skinny but powerfully built, his skin was slightly bronzed by the sun that was shining at his neck that was fully covered with linear & cubic tattoos artwork that looked sublime on him as these exquisite forms were going all the way up his soft neck where they joined with large tribal piercings on his left ear. On the other side of his cheek, he had a small reversed cross tattoo as the sign of his anti-Christianity.

He was projecting wiry energy that gave him an effect of youth despite that this year he turned 30 years old. He possessed the body language of a charming prince and the mental strength of a confident king.

"Mitera System has communicated that recently you had an emotional stasis that made me worried about your well-being. However, seeing you here rea.s.sures me that you are fine." He said.

Every word he said sounded beautiful but impossible to feel compa.s.sion and trust as if Quarta was facing two different personas, her brother and the G.o.d in person.

"You see... This is what the joy and concern emotions sound and feel like. Do you miss that?" He immediately changed his tone to something more distant and perhaps intimidating.

As he said that, there was something puzzling in his gait, enough to jump off and holster your weapon because of how unusual usual he acted. But Quarta knew him very well so she stayed calm.

"Why don"t you say something? Nion, you are my sister! As both the ruler of this country and your brother, I need to know, what happened?" He insisted on employing a different, much mature tone.

After a brief moment of silence, Nion has opened her mouth and spoke out.

"I need to know something that is now growing in importance for me. How far do we have to go to protect our home from people who are seeking for help?" She asked.

"I see, I see... Let me return that question by asking you; Would you rather risk your friends and families" safety for a big or even small group of strangers whom you know nothing about?" He asked.

Nion said nothing back so Aleksithimia continued.

"Let"s presume that you know absolutely nothing about them, neither their past nor their present. Potentially exposing people who are dear to you because you are getting a fright or a strong empathy feeling every time you see someone who is weaker than you are, just remember that puppy you tried to protect when you were a kid." He said.

Nion remained silent. Aleksithimia took a deep breath and then continued.

"Let me elaborate on my thoughts...Imagine a situation when you have allowed a group of outsiders in our lands under your responsibility. Let us suppose that these family members are great people, respectful and polite. At some point, you will build a great relationship. At some point, they will ask you who is responsible for them if they can bring the rest of their family members from the outside to join them. It would be natural for them to stick all together so that n.o.body feels left out."

"Now, let us suppose that out of this second group of ten people, there are two men who are mentally unstable because they were forced to leave their hometown. Starting with the moment they successfully reunite with their family; they will live with a strong feeling of nostalgia and deep regret leaving their home country for a new place that they do not specifically like. Soon after, they begin to complain about their new life and quickly became excluded from the inner family circle." Said Aleksithimia.

"I don"t get your point..." Said Nion.

"Alala, just wait and listen." Replied Aleksithimia.

"So, where was I...Ah! So, these two men will find themselves in an unknown place where they are rejected and will get frustrated because n.o.body is willing to understand their pain of not being able to go back to their hometown. Their frustration will further transform into grief and despair... There is a high possibility that these two men will try to attract all kinds of attention by doing random unpleasant action, from the beginning it could be some minor crimes such as stealing and can surely evolve to something much more dangerous." He said.

"I am sorry but it is wrong!" Argued Nion.

"Huh, and how am I wrong, please, enlighten me with your thoughts then." Said Aleksithimia.

"You are literally trying to convince me that outsiders are the absolute source of unnecessary problems and danger without giving me a rational explanation of your thoughts about this subject. Besides, according to you, these people and their actions are the major reasons for our land"s potential concerns." Said Nion.

"And they are..." Said Aleksithimia

"You are the one who taught us to think twice before acting, but I am starting to think that the whole Keepers project is operating on blind trust." Argued Nion.

"Please, elaborate." He said.

"I am more than proud of all the hard work that has been accomplished; you have saved and will surely save thousands of lives. Your devotion to this country is absolute. But, you and I, as genetical siblings, are still human beings and that means that sometimes we have to step back on our decision and review them from another point of view..." Said Nion.

Aleksithimia went back to his desk and serves himself a gla.s.s scotch.

"Oh, how rude of me! Do you want some?" Asked Aleksithimia while hanging over another gla.s.s to Nion

"Oh, how rude of me! Do you want some?" Asked Aleksithimia while hanging over another gla.s.s to Nion.

"Please, do not try to change the subject!" She said firmly.

"You... Seem very irritated today." He said while enjoying his drink. "You know, I hated the old times, when the elders managed this country. Propaganda was the way the would spread lies and terror, empty promises to keep us, the next generation shut."

"Don"t you think that you are not so different in the end?" Asked Nion.
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"Only time will tell...For now, my only priority is those who are within these walls. I have to keep them safe...If for that reason I must sacrifice hundreds or even thousands of strangers whom I"ve never heard before... I am willing to pay the price." He said.

Nion threw her report on the prosper"s desk and then walks towards the entrance door.

"Now it is very clear, what drives you and why you"ve made such a radical decision. I am more than grateful to you for what you are doing for our hometown that I love and cherish as much as you do. However, the fact that you have to review the borders situation stays the same..." Said Nion.

Aleksithimia looked that he is enjoying his little sister giving him a moral lesson so he just sat on the desk and kept listening in silence.

"I am aware that some people who are coming from the outside world can cause some problems. But even then, it is going to be what? 3-5% out of everyone who is suffering out there? There surely is, there has to be, a better way to deal with these people rather than executing every single one of them because they did not respect your statement." Said Nion.

As she finished her phrase, she gave her brother a couple of seconds to say something back, but since he did not she continued.

"Last night, I saw fire coming from the forest area across the borders of Elpida. I need your permission to cross the borderline and investigate that area." Said Nion but Aleksithimia abruptly turned himself in her direction and raised his tone.

"You are not going in there!" He said.

"But I may get some valuable information regarding the recent increase in incoming raids from Elpida. This could be potentially used for our cause!" Nion insisted.

"Quarta! I am not repeating myself twice!"

"But why?!"

"Because I am the one who decides!" Replied Aleksithimia.

"How many innocent people do I have to sacrifice before you open your eyes?!" She asked.

"If they don"t respect my rules, they must be punished, that"s it!" Replied Aleksithimia.

"Just listen to me! I have been observing this area for a while now and there is something wrong going on out there. These people, raiders or whatever you are calling them, I was there and I saw it with my own eyes. These families, they were blindly running away from something. I can tell when someone is ready to die, that"s what I saw in their eyes!" Nion raised her voice.

"I do understand that you are raising your voice because you want to be heard. It is really interesting to hear someone, full of emotions, so alive... Perhaps you think that n.o.body can understand you around here, but let me correct you for a second." Said Aleksithimia as he stood up from his desk and approached his sister.

"Ah, look at you...Do you feel it...Do you know what it is called? That frustration that collides with sadness... It is called empathy. And now, my little sister, you are trying to make sense out of all the mess you"ve been through blaming me about that... I am sorry, but border policy won"t change, at least for now." Said Aleksithimia.

"Then maybe, you should go outside and take a little tour! Don"t you think that it is quite easy to control everything from the capital? Empathy or whatever, I am the one who does the job, I think I have the right to express myself!!" Shouted Nion.

"Easy...You don"t have to raise your voice on me, I hear you. You know, our current situation is much more complex than you improving strong emotions to whomever you"ve met at the borders. If we do open borders with selective entrance, considering the state of our current economy, there is a big possibility that we would get an overload of demands and I do not want to make the same mistakes elders have made before, I do not want to promise something we cannot accomplish right now." He said.

"If we accept selective entrance, give permission to people from outside, we will possibly face an inner conflict coming from our population. There is a high chance that our population would split into two counterparts. Those who will support refugees to arrive on our land and will do their best to help them establish a new life in our lands and another group of people who will be absolutely against the idea of outsiders who will also bring their own culture with them, won"t specifically obey and respect all of our rules which will became a potential problem and even more." he said.

"Conflict is something easy to generate. There is a high possibility that emotions of hate and rejection will reappear again as before. This is possible although most of our land"s population is using "Emotional Suppressors" and I would say 99% do not even remember what "Hate" feels like. If what I just mentioned happens, these emotions will come back and possibly destroy our current stability that took long years to put in place. Racial hate and exclusion... This is something I do not want the new generation to experience anymore ... Not on my lands. This is why my main task for at least right now is to maintain the peace and serenity of this land as it is." He explained.

"Your emotional suppressor does regulate their emotions, but you should know that humans cannot be tamed the way you do, soon or later you will have to face the consequences..." Said Nion.

"I know that you are doing an amazing job, it is not something that everyone can do. I am aware of that. Give me more time to find a suitable solution for our people." He kissed Nion"s forehead.

Doors open, Seconda (The Keeper rang #2) enters the room...