"Are you blaming me for this?" I asked, and the anger was just there again. Damian"s hand tightened on my shoulder. Nathaniel put his hand in mine. It helped me push the anger down again, but it was there and if I wasn"t careful it could raise my beasts and then we would be in a mess.
"I"m just saying that Haven thinks like the fifteen-year-old he was when he joined the werelions. He"s stuck there emotionally. It makes him react to things."
"What do I do?" I asked, and that I asked him was a mark of what we meant to each other. I didn"t ask many people"s opinion.
"Save Noel and Travis first; get them on this side of the room, then see if Haven is willing to be reasonable."
"Reasonable how?" I asked.
"s.e.x, maybe."
"I don"t want to f.u.c.k him; I"m so mad at him I can"t see straight."
"May I offer an opinion, ma pet.i.te ma pet.i.te?"
I turned back to the man at my side. "Please, at this point I"m taking suggestions. I am in over my head here." I said out loud what I"d thought earlier. "This would be easier if you had a tie to the lions, and not just me."
Jean-Claude looked at me. His face was unreadable, but it was a long, considering look. "Augustine said he spoke to you about the lions and certain possibilities."
"We don"t have time for coy, Jean-Claude. He told me that there was a chance, if you slept with the women of some of the cat-based animal groups, that you might gain them as your animal to call, too. He thinks you might be able to gain an animal through me, instead of me always gaining through you."
"Are you saying you want us to sleep with the female cats?" Richard asked.
I looked at him. "No, I"m saying maybe Jean-Claude should sleep with them." I added, because he was looking at me, "Jean-Claude makes me feel secure. You don"t yet, Richard. Jean-Claude has hung in there while I f.u.c.ked a lot of other men. He"s been a good sport, so maybe it"s my turn to be a good sport."
"Ma pet.i.te, the lions will be here in moments; I want to be very clear between us. Are you saying that you would be open to me sleeping with the female lions while you sleep with the males?"
I fought not to cross my arms or look pouty. "I think so, oh, h.e.l.l, I don"t know. As a theory, I think it"s got merit."
"Merit?" Jean-Claude said. "That is not a strong enough word to get me into another woman"s bed, ma pet.i.te ma pet.i.te. I think merit would come back and, how would you say, bite me on the a.s.s."
I couldn"t blame him. "I need help, Jean-Claude. The leopards work because Micah is reasonable and wants to help me, and he"s leopard king to my queen. The tigers work because so far the only males in town are mine. We don"t have a tiger group to get p.i.s.sy with me. The rats and swans work not because they"re our animal to call but because their leaders value the order you"ve brought to the city and they want to help that along."
Jean-Claude spoke into the air, into his earpiece, whatever. "Give us a moment." He forgot all about code names as he turned to me. "The lions are outside the door, and making Haven wait will not help things. Do you want me to try to seduce one of the women into my bed? It must be yes or no."
"Can I think about it?" I asked.
"No. Yes or no."
"No s.e.x for tonight, but make friends so that maybe another night soon you can."
"Not precise enough," he said. "I will not be punished for doing what you tell me to do. Tell me to seduce them, or tell me don"t, and tell me now."
I stared at him and didn"t know what to say. But he was right; I had to decide now. f.u.c.k. "I don"t know how I feel about you with another woman that I haven"t met. Can I meet them first and then ask me again?"
He smiled at me. "You may." He spoke back to the headgear. "Let the White King through." Silence and then he said, "Yes, the Black Queen and the Black King are in agreement, bring them through."
I didn"t bother to turn my own headset back on because I was pretty sure that I wouldn"t want anything I said in the next few minutes on an open frequency, and I didn"t have to worry about giving a green light to one of our snipers. The lions had all gone home except the ones pushing their way through the curtains now. All the dangerous things were in here with us.
CHAPTER 16
TWO OF OUR guards came through first, holding the long drapes aside so that Haven and his lions could go through. He was around six feet tall, a little narrower through the shoulders than I liked, but what frame he had was muscled. He took his conditioning seriously, but lions are more p.r.o.ne to have fights for dominance at short notice. Staying in shape could be the difference between living or dying. Most lions took their exercise pretty seriously because of that.
He was wearing a long, pale trench coat over a nice suit. He was all tans and cream, as if the clothing were a preview of the lion inside him. His hair was still shades of blue, with highlights and lowlights as if blue were a natural color for human hair, so that the dye job was still one of the best unnatural shades I"d ever seen. The hair was shaved short on the sides and longer on top so he could gel it in little spikes. His eyes were still blue. My lioness sniffed the air as soon as I saw him, because primate that I was, I wanted to see him, but my lioness wanted to smell him.
His power crept over me as if warm breath had suddenly drifted over every inch of my skin. I shivered and my lioness began to pad up that long metaphysical path. She"d liked Haven from the moment we met him. I"d known bad news when I saw it. But nothing changed how much my body wanted him. I wanted to be naked and roll every inch of me over every inch of him the way a cat will luxuriate while it"s scent-marking. He was mine and I was his the way that Micah and I had belonged to each other. My pulse sped.
Nathaniel"s hand tightened in mine, and Damian scooted closer, putting his arm around us both. It helped me think, helped slow my pulse. Jean-Claude put his hand in my last free hand, and that helped even more. I didn"t have to look to know that Richard had put his arm across the couch so that he was touching Jean-Claude, too. I knew we were all touching, and with every touch I was a little less the victim of the lion inside me, and the one walking into the room.
Haven"s energy breathed harder against my skin. I smelled sun-burnt gra.s.s, dust, and the rich scent of lion. Once it would have been enough to bring my lioness crashing against the walls of my body; with everyone"s hands on me it was tempting, but I didn"t have to give in to it.
A low growl vibrated out from between those human lips. The sound of it seemed to vibrate along my spine, as if my body were a tuning fork and that one low sound hit just the right note. I tried to stand up and hands held me in my seat. I turned on them, snarling, my lioness loud in my head.
Haven strode across the carpet toward us, and I knew he meant to jerk me free of all that restraint. His power went before him like an advance attack. I could either stand up and go to him in this body, or my lioness could try to go to him in a different one. I actually got to my feet. Jean-Claude and Nathaniel still had my hands, but I was standing, wanting Haven to touch me. His energy seemed strong, and giving in to it a little had kept the lion from trying to tear her way out of me.
Bram was a dark blur just suddenly appearing in front of me, blocking Haven"s way. I knew that Micah had told him to do it. A small logical part of me knew why he"d done it, and even agreed as Nimir-Ra, but the lioness didn"t agree. She snarled at Bram"s tall form between her and her Rex. She"d have had the same reaction if Bram had stood between her and prey. I pulled free of Nathaniel"s hand. Only Jean-Claude kept me from either jumping Bram or just running around him. Truthfully, attacking from behind was the first plan. The visual was of me as a lion on his back, claws digging into his flesh, my teeth sinking into his scalp, his head, crushing his skull.
The visceral almost-memory helped me climb back into my head and push the lioness back. I was a person, not an animal. I could control this. I didn"t want to hurt Bram.
When Haven felt my lion go cold, his energy was still there, still seeking lion. It found the lions he"d brought with him. Their energy flared. I could see it, not with my eyes, but with the back of my head. I knew it was Jesse, tall, dark, and handsome, and Payne, tall, pale, and handsome. Payne really was his last name, not a nickname since he was an enforcer. But I saw their lions around them like halos, one with a mane that was almost black and the other so pale it was ghostlike. But there were other lions behind them: a woman I didn"t know, tall, strongly built, but all curves. I had an impression of short dark hair, but mostly her lioness was tawny with darker marks so that she looked almost spotted in places. The other woman was much shorter, with long yellow hair, but her lioness wasn"t smaller. It was a huge golden form snarling around her human body as if it were a wick and the lion the flame.
Then I saw two more lions lying on the floor. They didn"t burn bright. Their lions were red-orange glows like a fire that was fading. They were younger lions, with shorter manes, ragged compared to the other men. Their lions turned and looked at me, one with a halo of dark mane, the other paler, but the lions looked at me. They knew me.
I suddenly saw the world through a golden haze. I turned my head and I could see my lioness over me like a glow just behind my eyes. She, like the other short woman, wasn"t a small lion. She was a great dark gold shape rearing over and around me. I"d seen Micah"s leopard once like this around him, but never again. Now all I could see was lions.
One of the lions on the floor stirred and lifted his head, and I had the double image of Travis; it was his golden-brown curls with that darker mane around it like an overlay. He looked at me, and he fought to reach his hand out toward me. Injured, it was the closest he could come to the begging gesture that most of the lycanthropes had. It was a submissive"s way of asking a dominant to forgive him, to help him.
Noel lay very still beside him. The image of his lion was a dark red shadow, growing dimmer. Some part of me knew what that meant. Noel was dying. In that moment the lioness and I were in agreement. You didn"t kill what was ours. In the wild, lionesses will band together to keep a male intruder from taking over a pride. They"ll fight beside their chosen males to keep their land, their cubs, safe.
I tried to go around Bram and Haven. I just wanted to get to Noel before that energy died completely. Bram let me walk around, but Haven grabbed for me, and he was faster than either Bram or I thought, because his hand was around my upper arm before Bram could react.
The moment he touched me, all that golden energy swirled together like some golden bonfire. So much power, so much energy. It felt so good. He kissed me while my eyes were still closed from the rush of power. I kissed him back and we opened our eyes and it was like we stood in the center of cool, golden fire.
He smiled down at me, and I had to smile back. Then I heard a voice. "Anita." The voice sounded broken, and I looked behind me. Travis was reaching for me and Noel . . .
I looked up at Haven. "We save Noel first, then we"ll talk."
Haven"s grip tightened around me. "Even now, feeling this power and you want him. Them?"
"He"s dying."
"The weak die; it"s the way of lions."
"With this power we can call his beast. We can save him."
His arms tightened further around me. "I don"t want him saved."
"I do."
"Be with me and we can save him."
I"d kissed him without thinking, and now my arms were pinned down between our bodies with his arms wrapped around me. I couldn"t reach either gun or the big knife down my back, but I could reach the wrist sheaths. I pretended to struggle ineffectually and knew Haven of all the men in my life would buy it. One of our problems was that he just couldn"t see women as equal. Equally dangerous, that is.
I used the struggling to hide my drawing one of the slender silver blades, and only as he felt my arm tense to drive the blade home did he realize his danger.
He started to let me go, to get distance, but I had time to start the blade into his body. Had time to feel it sink home, the razor-sharp blade slicing through his shirt and the meat underneath, sinking home the way it had a hundred other times in big bad monsters. The only thing that saved him was that he had my arms pinned too low on his body for me to reach his heart, even if he hadn"t moved.
He let me go, stumbling back from me. I had time to see the blood on my knife, the first bloom of red on his shirt, the surprise on his face. His two guards were frozen, not knowing what to do. It was as if they hadn"t believed I"d hurt him.
I yelled to our guards, "Keep him off me until I"ve healed Noel." I didn"t turn my back on the wounded werelion, but I backed up as fast as I could. Bram and the other guards were moving around Haven ready to do exactly what I"d said.
The taller female werelion was kneeling beside Noel. She was stroking his hair, and I realized the moment I"d stabbed Haven that the double vision of glowing lions overlaid on the human form had vanished, as if I"d done something to damage all that power.
The woman raised brown eyes to me. They were shiny with unshed tears. She whispered, "You"re too late."
CHAPTER 17
I LAID MY hand on Noel"s back. I waited for his body to breathe, but it didn"t come. "s.h.i.t," I said. "Get Dr. Lillian, get someone. Get some f.u.c.king medics down here now!"
I heard someone on their cell phone doing what I"d asked. Please, G.o.d, don"t let him die. Please, G.o.d, don"t let him die. He was only twenty-four, a year older than Nathaniel. The brown-haired woman knelt by his head, tears beginning to trail down her face. "Don"t cry, not yet," I said. She looked at me, startled. I realized she was wearing a red dress. It was as if I were only seeing things in pieces. The other female lion came to stand by us. Her long blond hair was tied back in a ponytail, and she was wearing almost as many weapons as I was. "This wasn"t our choice." He was only twenty-four, a year older than Nathaniel. The brown-haired woman knelt by his head, tears beginning to trail down her face. "Don"t cry, not yet," I said. She looked at me, startled. I realized she was wearing a red dress. It was as if I were only seeing things in pieces. The other female lion came to stand by us. Her long blond hair was tied back in a ponytail, and she was wearing almost as many weapons as I was. "This wasn"t our choice."
I realized that the guards and the other three lions were fighting. Haven was trying to get to me, whether to hurt me back or try for another kiss I didn"t know and I didn"t give a f.u.c.k. I trusted the guards to keep him off me. h.e.l.l, I trusted Wicked and Truth alone to keep a small army of werelions off me. Three lions was nothing.
"If we had a real Regina or Rex, we could delay it," the blonde said.
I nodded, because to some part of me that sounded logical. I remembered the energy between Haven and me, and the ghosts of fire around the other werelions. I prayed, Help me save him Help me save him. I visualized my lioness, but not inside me; I tried to call that shining, golden fire that had been around us all just minutes ago.
The blonde knelt by me. "Like this," she said, and suddenly I could see her lioness again, so much bigger than her human form, a wavering golden energy that looked at me with golden eyes while her blue eyes stared at me through a lion"s mask.
I reached out, and the moment her hand came near enough mine it was as if I caught fire. My lioness blazed around us, golden, shining, burning bright. I turned dark gold eyes to the other woman and held out my hand. She reached out and the three of us knelt over Noel. We didn"t touch hands, but it was as if that pulsing energy touched the fire of our lions.
"We put energy into him, force his beast," the blonde said.
"Do it," I said.
She reached down to Noel"s still form, and our hands came with hers so that we all touched him at the same time. But it was like trying to heat stone; there was no answering spark. I knew how to work with the dead, but not like this.
"It"s too late," the dark-haired woman said.
"No!" I said.
"Maybe," the blonde said.
I called out, "Jean-Claude!"
He came to me, kneeling beside me. "What would you have of me, ma pet.i.te ma pet.i.te?"
"He"s too far gone. Help me."
He didn"t say the obvious, that he didn"t know how, or that we"d never attempted anything like this. He simply called, "Richard, Nathaniel, Damian, come."
Nathaniel and Damian came immediately. Nathaniel asked, "Where do you want us?"
"Touch your master," Jean-Claude said.
They laid a hand on each of my shoulders as they knelt, and the moment they touched me I felt my eyes go. Through the golden glow of the lions I knew my eyes burned like dark brown stars. Nathaniel and Damian cried out beside me and they turned purple and green glowing eyes to me. The lion"s energy flowed over them both. Nathaniel"s leopard sprang to life like some wavering black shape. Damian had no animal to flow and he was just covered in the gold of lions.
Jean-Claude knelt behind the three of us and laid his hands over theirs, so we all touched. The energy flowed over him, too, but I felt it spark, like a jolt of electricity through it all. I didn"t have to see it to know that his eyes had sunk to midnight-blue fire.
Richard stood above us, hesitating. "What do I do?"
"Touch Jean-Claude," I said.
I wasn"t sure he"d do it, but he did. He stayed on his feet so he loomed above us all, but laid his hands over Jean-Claude"s and the power spread, flowed. I heard him say, "G.o.d!" Then I felt Jean-Claude move closer against my body. I moved my legs apart so he could press as much of himself against as much of me as possible. I knew that Richard, still standing, was pressed against the back of Jean-Claude.
The five of us knelt in a flickering bonfire of different-colored energy, but it didn"t travel to the lions. Their power flowed to us, but not the other way. I realized that the blond woman"s hand was just above mine, not touching.
I grabbed her hand. She startled and started to pull away, saying, "It doesn"t work like that . . . ," but then our energy jumped the circuit. It flowed down my hand and into her. Her hand convulsed around mine and around the dark-haired woman. I saw the black flame of my leopard, the spark of Jean-Claude"s eyes, and the emerald glow of Damian, and a reddish shine that had to be Richard"s wolf flow into the lions.
The dark-haired woman laid her hand on Noel. His body jumped as the power shoved into him. His human body split, gushing thick, warm, liquid around our knees. Fur flowed over him until he lay in the shape of a huge lion. Its dark mane was not very thick, not very impressive, but I didn"t give a d.a.m.n. I just wanted him to breathe.
Micah was suddenly there. He knelt on the other side of Nathaniel and took his other hand. The power jumped another octave.
The woman touching him said, "Heartbeat, but he"s not breathing."
I felt lion, more lion, running down the hallway toward us. I knew it was Nicky still in lionman form. He was coming for the fight, coming toward the energy we were raising. I knew that the lions more than the other animal groups gave off energy to attract, or warn off, other lions, but I hadn"t understood until this moment that there were other things you could do with all that power.
Noel spat blood onto the floor, but he had to be breathing to do that. The blonde kept the energy concentrated on him as I turned to look at Nicky. The golden lionman burst through the curtains and started toward the fight, but I said, "Nicky, I need you."
He never hesitated. He simply turned toward us and said, "Where do I go?"
I said the first thing that came to mind. "Puppy pile, touch as much as you can." It was all I could think of; the kind of vampire we were worked better with touch, and more touch couldn"t hurt. He laid all that golden lionman across Noel"s lion, and put his arm around Travis, drawing the still form in with us. Nicky put one hand out and grabbed my belt, putting his big fingers inside it against my bare waist. My lioness flared into that bonfire of energy, and Nicky"s rose with mine. It wasn"t as bright as it had been with Haven, but it was bright, and it was power, and it joined all the other power seamlessly. I realized what we"d missed, what we"d needed, willingness without will of its own. Nicky gave himself to this as he"d given himself to everything I"d asked of him since he became mine.