Anguish squeezing her lungs, she choked against the hard, relentless force of strangulation. There was nothing left but a burning ache, desire and loss come together in a head-on collision at fatal speed. She tasted tears on her lips, and knew she should be horrified by her weakness, but they had forcibly dissolved that concern an o.r.g.a.s.m or two ago.
aSavannah.a Gentle hands removed the blinders, and Lucas was there, his eyes thoughtful, a little sad, but with a light that suggested he had hope for them all. aYouave rendered him speechless. I think heas one step from apoplectic.a She looked at Matt through her tears and suddenly wished she was untied. Out of a sense of self-preservation. Matt looked more angry than shead ever seen him. Not a cold controlled anger, eithera"the enraged pa.s.sion of a man pushed past some boundary of restraint.
aThis is your own fault,a Lucas said, unperturbed.
She glanced back at him, startled, realized he wasnat talking to her.
aJust tell her straight out, for Chrissakes.a aLeave us, then,a Matt said.
Savannah felt a sudden surge of fear, but Lucas laid a hand on the tender area between her shoulder and neck. He lowered the harness so she was on the table. Ben helped him free her legs. Hands straightened her, caressing her thighs, bringing her feet back to the floor. The suspension device and all its components were removed from around and beneath her. With gentle pressure, Lucas kept her upper body on the silken mahogany. He slid off her mask, though, laid it aside and smoothed her hair back, his thumb brushing over the path of a tear. He leaned down, kissed her temple. aYouall be safe with him.a aLucas.a aGoing.a He straightened, made a quick gesture with his head and they all left, melting into the shadows and stepping out the door, four men who had profoundly altered her reality in the s.p.a.ce of an evening. Now she faced what her destiny would be tomorrow.
Despite Lucasas not-so-subtle hint, she pushed her body up. Naked though she was, she felt less vulnerable facing Matt with her back straight. And her clothes were folded over the chair not more than a yard from her.
She discovered two things immediately. One was that Lucas had had a practical reason for encouraging her to stay down. The body she had walked in with several hours before had suddenly become heavy and unbalanced, her knees trembling, her vision blurring and tilting as blood rushed back into her torso.
The second thing was that Matt moved a lot faster and more silently than she antic.i.p.ated. With her head spinning, she wasnat even aware of his approach, but suddenly he was there, the heat of his hands on her hips, the faint scratch of his slacks pressing against the back of her bare legs, his white shirt against her shoulder blades, the silk of his tie a caress against her spine.
It got very quiet between them, and Savannah could only hear the sound of her own harsh breathing, the echo of her words, obviously laden with hurt, lingering in the room. She had no choice but to lean, but in truth, it was a relief to feel him there. That he was still angry shead no doubt, but he obviously wasnat intending to take it out on her in some frightening way. She hoped.
aI donat know you enough to trust you like this,a she mumbled, but still she didnat move. If anything, she settled back against him as he took a more secure, possessive grip on her waist, his hold sliding forward so his arm was over her abdomen, his palm over the opposite hip as he raised his other hand, applied gentle pressure until her head was on his shoulder, the upper slope of his chest.
aYes, you do,a he said quietly.
Head gotten her to admit she wanted him, not as a moment of pa.s.sing l.u.s.t, not to act on a curious attraction. All the desires he had roused through his men had culminated in one raging trutha"that it was him she wanted, him whom she now leaned against, the only one she trusted enough to reveal such a need. From the very beginning, she had denied it in every way, that he was the culmination and solution. Head exposed the lie by not offering what she had expected him to offer to close the eveningas deal. Shead been outmaneuvered, and now there was just the frightening truth between them. He held all the poker chips, and he could tear her to shreds. But she still had his desire for her to bargain with, shift some of the balance to her side of the table.
aSo what does Lucas want you to tell me?a She leaned her head into his touch, nuzzled him with her lips deliberately. He pulled loose, lowered his grip, closed it over her throat. Feeling her fragile pulse beating against that powerful hand made it beat harder.
She looked up into those dark eyes, sensual lips, imagined them moving over her. Thatas it, Savannah. Focus on what he could give her on the surface, two bodies satisfying each other. What was beneath didnat matter. Couldnat matter.
aIam sorry I was catty,a she said abruptly. aYou set this up and we all enjoyed ourselves. I just went all female on you for a moment.a aDid you?a He cupped her chin and held it so she was locked into looking up at him, into his unfathomable gaze.
aYou know I did. It was a slip, that was all. It wonat happen again. Thereas no reason we canat enjoy each othera"a aAnd keep all our commitments tomorrow, meet every appointment. Savannah, I am not your b.l.o.o.d.y f.u.c.king father.a Her body went rigid. The anger was still there, blasting her with its heat, but his eyes held something else, something close to pain, that shead never seen in his eyes before. A part of himself he was deliberately revealing to her. He turned her, his hands closing over her shoulders.
aWell, I certainly hope you arenat him,a she managed. aOtherwise, what just happened in this rooma"a His grip tightened further, nearly dragging her to her toes.
aMatta"a aJust shut up, before I decide to strangle you.a He placed his finger on her lips. aListen to what Iam saying. Look into my eyes and stop being afraid of what this is. It wouldnat have hurt you so much, my proposal to let you choose anyone, if it werenat real, what youare thinking.a aLet go of me,a she said.
aNever again.a He shook his head. Shook her. aWe wouldnat want you to go all female on us, would we? h.e.l.l, donat stop there. Letas not be human while youare at it. Why should you have needs, desires and, G.o.d forbid, express anger or pain where someone else can see it? I want a human woman with a healthy mixture of weaknesses and strengths, who sometimes laughs inappropriately, or gets in real fights with me. Someone from whom I beg for forgiveness, even if I know I was right, because I know making her happy is more important to me than being right. Someone who doesnat want to be alone.a aIave been alone all my life.a aLonely all your life.a aYes, G.o.dd.a.m.n you.a She shot it back savagely, and there was a rough, tearing quality to her voice, somewhere before a shout and a snarl. She startled him enough she managed to pull away, back up several steps, and s.n.a.t.c.h up her blouse. aYes, I have been, Matt. Boohoo for me. The princess in the tower, given everything she wants except her daddyas love. So what? Youare going to make it all better? Is that what the h.e.l.l this is all about?a aYes.a aWell, tough, because it doesnat work that way.a aYes, it does. It can. It should.a He took a step toward her, like a man approaching a wild and dangerous animal, not with fear, but respect and caution, not wanting to harm the creature. aI love you. Itas as simple as that. And if youare willing to give that a try, even give it just a moment of belief in your heart, I promise I wonat let you down. You wonat feel lonely anymore.a aYouare out of your f.u.c.kaidiotic minds, all of you.a She nearly screamed at the amus.e.m.e.nt that came into his eyes at her avoidance of cursing. aDonat you dare laugh at me, Matt Kensington.a She s.n.a.t.c.hed the belt off the table, flung it at his chest. He caught it, the amus.e.m.e.nt turning into annoyance. Good.
aYouave stripped me down, great. You blithely tell me you love me, without taking off one piece of clothing, metaphorical or otherwise. For all I know, itas just a good con, the whole thing, because as far as I can tell, you havenat even broken a sweat tonight. So, tell me what Lucas wanted you to say. Get off of your high horse and tell me what this is all really about. a aItas about asking you out on a G.o.dd.a.m.ned date.a He shouted it so fiercely it echoed through the room. She even imagined she heard the windows of the high-rise rattle.
aWhat?a It was such an unexpected statement, she had to grope for something to say, particularly when he continued to glare at her without further explanation. aMatthew, this is not your average first date.a He chuckled at that, but it was a harsh sound. aYouave got that right. aDidnat break a sweat.a Jesus Christ. I ought to wring your neck.a He rubbed a hand over his face, through his dark hair until it stood on end in a very appealing tousle. aThis entire night, the idea of it, started because I wanted to get involved with you, and I didnat think anything short of something this dramatic would work.
aIf youad accepted my invitation to go out on a date, and treated me in that clinical, detached way you do those other losers Iave seen you attend political functions and movie premieres with, I think Iad have had to kill you.a She stared at him a very long moment, and there was no motion in the room except for the flickering light of those many different screens, showing the story of her life for the past few hours.
She lowered her gaze to the blouse she was holding. It was an odd contrast to her pale naked body, and the soft glitter of the lovely chandelier nipple jewels. She liked the way those looked, and how Mattas eyes kept straying to them. Savannah struggled past those thoughts, to what was going on in her own head. To what she knew she had to be brave enough to say, if she truly wanted to believe Mattas words.
It was five minutes before she found the courage, and to his credit, he waited, motionless, through the extraordinarily long pause.
aYou know,a she said, her voice thick, not her own. aOne day I was in the elevator with this young girl doing summer work in the mailroom. She had on the prettiest pair of sandals. I kept staring at those shoes, and I thoughta aI bet she really enjoyed buying those. I bet she likes looking at the way they look on her feet.a And it made me feel so sadaa aSavannah.a He took a step toward her, but she closed her eyes, shook her head. aAnd I knew then, though I didnat admit it to myself. Iave never bought clothes, shopped for fun, done anything out of a sense of spontaneous whimsy.a She took a deep breath, raised her head and met his eyes squarely. aYouare right. Youare all right. I was Geoffrey Tennysonas cyborg, from the day my mother died. So you are all absolutely right. As much as Iave fantasized about you, and wanted you, I would have treated you exactly that way. I wanted to be cruel to you tonight, finish up with all this and walk away, but I canat. I want you, Matt. And admitting that terrifies me.a aAnd love?a She lifted an uneasy shoulder. aI donat know what that is. I do knowaa her voice lowered and he came to her, so when she raised her head, she was looking directly up into his face, her bare body erotically almost pressed against his fully clothed one. aI know youare the asomeonea in the fantasy to comfort myself. Every time. You always have been, since the day I met you.a Reaching down, she picked up his hand. After only a brief hesitation, she brought it to her lips, pressing her face into his palm. Something seemed unusual and she raised her face enough to look at a wound on his palm. A deep wound, like a puncture. His blood had coagulated, but the wound was hot to the touch, sticky. aWhata"a His other hand touched her face, tracing the light impressions she could feel where the mask had pressed against her face.
aI kept digging my hand into the screw set under the table to keep myself from breaking down and releasing you. I almost broke, every time one of them touched you, every time you came, every time I heard the fear in your voice. I wanted this to be the right thing. And I told myself I was sure. But every time you got upsetaa A tremor ran through his hand, amazing her. aDonat ever make me go through that again.a aMake youa"a She saw the trace of a smile in his eyes, a moment before her knees gave out on her.
aWhoa.a He caught her at the waist as she gripped his coat lapels for balance, and before she knew what he was about, head lifted her off her feet and was headed to the couch.
aI didnat feed you enough, I think,a he observed.
Not to mention what three or four mind-blowing o.r.g.a.s.ms in one night can do to someone.
He laid her down on the couch and then straightened, retaining one of her hands in his, studying her.
aMatt,a she whispered. aMatt,a she repeated softly, seeing what was in his dark, intent eyes. She was afraid to put her arms around him, afraid to stroke her fingers through his hair, afraid to do anything. Struggling against all her natural instincts to curl into a protective fetal ball and deny what she was so scared and hopeful was the truth.
Never lose control. Her father had told her, from her very first tantrum. You give the enemy the advantage when you lose control. And it took her very little time to understand he meant that to apply to everything, because to him there wasnat any time that wasnat about business, the business of life, the ultimate corporation. You ruled your life and everyone around you with iron control, or you opened yourself to defeat, to takeover. To failure.
To the disappointment in her fatheras face.
Oh, G.o.d. To think that her whole life, the compa.s.s she followed each day, had always pointed to that. One tyrannical manas expectations, a man who was dead.
n.o.body could possibly understand how hard it would be to let that go, when her whole life had been structured on it. The idea of turning to something different was the same as detonating a bomb that would blow up her foundation, her world. Shead been called a Daddyas girl, but that implied something soft, with golden curls, like Lucas had described. Shead been his weapon, his tool.
But tonight had been about who she was, Savannah. And by making it about that, Matt had told her clearly, through action, that it was her he wanted. Not the weapon of Geoffrey. Her. And though she might not have much of an idea of who Savannah Tennyson was, when she looked into Mattas eyes, she saw he knew. As if his eyes were the mirror shead never been able to find to show her what her true face was. And there she finally had the truth of why he was always the center of her comfort fantasy. Of every fantasy.
aYou really do love me.a His hand reached out, smoothed her hair from her temple, tilted her chin so she had to look up at him, into his unsmiling, devastatingly handsome countenance.
aAnd you love me, sweetheart. Iall wait for you to know it, the way I do.a It was such a reflection of her own thoughts, she had to stifle tears. aWe donatawe havenat even gone out on a date. Iam not counting tonight, Matthew.a aI beg to differ.a He caressed her hand, playing idle finger games with her, a wonderfully intimate pastime that fascinated her. aOver the past two years, we have had over thirty-eight dates. Weave played the same fencing games that dating couples play. Weave even spent the entire night together, several times. Weave ordered food.a Her mouth turned up into a shy smile. aMatt, youare as dysfunctional as I am. Those are meetings, not dates. Next thing youall say is that the video we saw on the new line of hydraulic nailers was the same as going to a movie.a aI laid an arm over the back of your chair. I would have tried to cop a feel, but figured youad chew my arm off at the shoulder.a She laughed then, and it wasnat as hopeless a sound as she expected it to be.
He removed his hand from hers, began to loosen his tie.
aWhatawhat are you doing?a Her throat had gone dry, knowing exactly what he was doing. The trembling in her thighs increased, and all the pa.s.sion stroked to life but unfulfilled by Peter and Ben flared as if there had never been a lull. Every cell of her body begged.
aYou know what Iam doing. Youare mine. And notions of twentieth-century promiscuity be d.a.m.ned, we both know the way I intend to stake my claim on you, make you mine forever.a
Chapter Six.
aHave you thought of just asking?a she asked softly, stilling him in the act of unb.u.t.toning the third b.u.t.ton of his shirt, exposing the fine dark hair of his chest that her fingers longed to stroke, tangle in, clutch when his body slid into hers.
aYou know the rules of negotiation. Never give them a chance to say no.a A full smile curved her lips this time, and she watched his eyes settle on her mouth with erotic intent. aBe brave, Matthew.a Matt seemed to weigh her words, every aspect of the moment, down to the ticking of the clock and the hum of the lighting.
aDonat calculate the risk, Matt,a she said, the silence driving away her tentative a.s.surance, making her eyes p.r.i.c.k with the threat of tears. aThis is so hard for me. Please, justabelieveaa In something larger than us both.
His eyes softened, and the crucial moment of connection was made, a moment of such impact she almost heard the click. aYouare right.a He dropped to one knee beside her. aI am very much in love with you, Savannah. Iave wanted you from the very first moment I saw you. Since the moment we met, youave stirred me up, made me think thoughts so fantastic youad laugh at them.a aLike what?a She touched his face, grateful that he stayed still, letting her fill with wonder at the simple pleasure of feeling his jaw beneath her fingers, knowing from his expression he wanted her hand there. It was a miracle to be wanted. She wondered if he could possibly understand that.
aYouare crying,a he said softly, and she nodded.
aYou havenat told me an example of fantastic thoughts.a aForever thoughts. A house. A dog. A shared portfolio.a She laughed then, a quick hitch into a sob. His gaze on hers, he stayed on one knee beside her, but finished unb.u.t.toning his shirt, drawing her attention down to his hands. Her bodyas urgent hum increased, disrupting her emotional focus. She had never felt so many different things at once. Her fingers trailed down his neck, followed the opening in his shirt to feel a manas chest, again for the first time. A shudder ran through his body. A new miracle. She lifted amazed eyes to him.
aYouave brought me to a place Iave never been tonight, Matt,a she admitted. aAnd Iave no idea where to go at this point but to lead with my feelings, even knowing that Iam giving you every opportunity to cut me to ribbons. I want you. Please. Just donataa It took every ounce of courage to say the words, and she was proud they came out, not as a trembling plea, but a quiet, steady request. aPlease donat hurt me.a She wasnat talking about the act. She knew he understood that. Shead never asked anyone for protection or defense. Instead, shead become a master at preventing people from hurting her. Shead crafted herself into a knight forever trapped in her mail, the metal becoming her true skin while everything inside withered away from lack of sunlight, stimulationatouch. Head broken her out of the mail, and she was shivering, naked, completely vulnerable. Completely alive.
aNever.a His voice was rough with emotion, and he came close, held her face cradled in his hands as he pressed his forehead to hers, touched her lips with his mouth. She cupped her hands over his strong, warm ones. aIave wanted you to say that to me for so long,a he murmured against her mouth. aTo hear that you trust me enough to ask it. Never, sweet Savannah. Iall destroy anyone who causes you a moment of pain.a The totally male, totally unrealistic promise nevertheless squeezed her heart into her throat, stopping her breath as much as when he straightened and slid out of the shirt, his tanned skin a golden gleam beneath the roomas dim light. He had beautiful musculature under the fine layer of male fur, and she could not help following the sleek lines of him down to the waistband of his slacks.
aDo you want more?a he asked quietly, his hand at the fastener.
A tiny smile curved her lips. aMy specialty is production. What do you think?a He chuckled, but she did raise one hand, holding them just a moment. aJustago slow. Youare kind of overwhelming. Actually, this whole nightas been a bit overwhelming.a aI know,a he said, a trace of regret in his voice. aIf I were any kind of gentleman, Iad wait, but Savannaha G.o.d, itas like a vampire thing. I have to make you mine by dawn or Iam afraid Iall lose you, that Iall see you tomorrow and youall be back behind your armor, convincing yourself it didnat mean what it meant, any of it.a His heated gaze traveled up her bare body, spreading fire. aBut if you feel the soreness, the stickiness of my come drying between your legs, the smell of me on your skin, see a red blush on your jaw in the mirror tomorrow from the rasp of my beard, you wonat.a aItas a signed deal, then,a she whispered. She lifted her arms. aWill you come and justalie on me a few minutes, before you take everything off?a He had bought a manas couch for his boardroom, so it was a good seven feet long and nearly three and a half feet wide. He tossed the small cushions scattered on it, except for one, which he adjusted under her head and shoulders, making her comfortable, before he stretched out upon her as she had requested. His finger trailed along her thigh with gentle pressure so she widened their span to accommodate his hips and long legs between them. She liked how he adjusted the pillow beneath her, scooping his arm under her shoulders, holding her face close to his chest, his chin brushing the top of her head as he saw to her comfort. What would it be to get used to that, someone caring how she felt, not because she was responsible for thousands of peopleas livelihoods, not because she was a legacy, but because he cared? And what would it be to care for him the same way, hold his hand at a movie, stroke his brow after a trying day, see him laugh at something on television, see that toe poke out of the end of its sock?
aHowas that?a he asked in that sensual, bedroom-hushed voice. aAm I too heavy?a The pressure of him on her was like the pressure of too much happiness on her heart, something so unfamiliar it was almost painful. It was a feeling close to heaven. His arms curled on either side of her head, her vision totally dominated by his handsome face, the dark eyes, that incredible mouth. Daring, she lifted her chin, reaching, and like a miraculous telepathy, he came down to meet her, with a soft, gentle kiss that was perfect. She parted her lips, shyly tasted him with her tongue, touching his lips, then his tongue, and felt the new sensation of his body tightening in response to the provocation. The friction of him against the juncture of her thighs, separated only by the trousers, pressed insistently, male power and strength held back only by his caring toward her. She closed her eyes as the kiss deepened, and a hundred things flashed through that darkness, things that had always been there, that she had refused to see. A hundred ways he had supported her, contributed to her reputation, respected her. She had focused on the battles, never allowing herself to see what else was there.
A million kindnesses. She remembered now, in stark detail, tiny things. Him reaching toward the center of the table, filling her water gla.s.s when it was almost empty, though his was full, underscoring that he was doing it as a courtesy to her. Silly, but now it seemed full of meaning. The many times head called her during the week, to discuss this or that detail on their mutual business interests, but in some subtle way head lifted her spirits by making a dry joke or witticism about something they both understood. The fact that head sent her flowers every Friday since her fatheras death.
She loved roses. She supposed head found that out from her office a.s.sistant. Head sent her the first bouquet right after her fatheras death. Shead thanked him for it, a.s.suming it was the usual condolence gesture. Then theyad kept coming, every Friday for the past two years. She hadnat acknowledged those bouquets at first, figuring if she ignored them he would stop sending them. He didnat. In all those two years, head never sent her the same shade, and never a dyed flower. Always beautiful palettes of hybrids from gardens all over the country. One bouquet had even been shipped from England. At some point shead started saving one bloom from each delivery, getting them pressed and preserved, and added them to a dried bouquet she kept in her bedroom. Often, it was what she studied as she lay down at night, somehow not feeling so alone by the simple act of gazing at them.
aYouave always been there for me, since we first met.a She accepted it. Said it out loud.
aNot as often as I should have been. I should have done something like this a long time ago.a He bent his head, put his lips beneath her ear and cruised down her neck. She arched, pulling on her bottom lip with her teeth as the movement rubbed her body against his, the soft skin of her inner thighs sliding against the outside of his, instinctively pushing her aching center against his hardness. She was amazed at her own wantonness, unleashing itself now that shea He raised his head as if he felt her reaction to her own thoughts. aSavannah?a aI trust you, Matt. Iave never trusted anyone, not in my entire life. I think thatas why tonight wasapossible. I kept asking myself why I wasnat screaming and fighting you, why I wasnat dialing 911 when I got free, and this was it. You knew, didnat you? Since that day on the desk, like you said.a He nodded, his heart and his desire for her in his gaze. aI knew.a aAnd that I wouldaa She suspected aenjoya wasnat the proper word. aarespond to this type of thing?a She wasnat worldly about s.e.x. She just knew it felt good, that she craved more.
aYes.a He kissed her nose, lingering so she closed her eyes, savored. aI knew you were mine the first time I saw you, and I knew youad be willing to be submissive to the right man, the man you could trust to take care of you when you have to be in control of everything else.
aYouare a strong, strong woman. The most basic way to prove that to you, the way the predator in you would understand, was to take you down the way another predator would. Make you expose your throat and concede my dominance over you.a He tilted her head back with a thumb to her chin, and set his teeth lightly to her jugular, flicking it with his tongue. aAs your mate. The one who cares for you and needs you the most. Who would never hurt you.a The words were offensive, but the truth behind them was so primal, so intuitive and beyond the realm of political correctness, her pulse leaped, not in anger, but in response, and her thighs relaxed, accommodating him further, sending exactly the message he had said he would pull from her. Total submission.
aIaI donat want to be free to choose any longer, Matt.a She got out the words, and she meant them so deeply, it was hard to form them. aI want to belong to you.a With an almost feral growl of need, he lifted up from her, just enough for there to be a s.p.a.ce. aOpen my slacks.a With trembling fingers, she found the hook fastener, slipped it, took down the zipper, her wrists brushing the hard heat beneath. He reached back, pushed them off his hips.
aMatt,a she said softly, not daring to look him in the eye. aWill youacan I feel all of you at once? Will you beaa aNaked?a His eyes smiled at her, though his jaw was tight with his desire for her. aAnything for you. Anything you ask, Iall give you.a He lifted off her, meliorating her immediate sense of loss by taking her hand as he rose, kissing her knuckles in a gallant gesture that ran electricity down her arm, tightening her b.r.e.a.s.t.s and the wet folds of her s.e.x.
Then he took off his shoes, one by one, pulled off the black dress socks, making her smile when he put his hand in one to show her the hole in the toe. His slacks were open during the process and her eyes were drawn to the play of his well-defined stomach muscles just above the band of his underwear, the black soft jersey boxers. He slid the slacks off, tossed them over one of the conference room chairs, then removed the boxers as well. He saved his watch for last, and she was able to watch the play of muscles in his arms and chest as he bent his elbows to perform the removal task, and look her fill at his bare body. He made no move to adjust his stance, keeping his blatant arousal, his whole body, open to a thorough appraisal.
She was shy about him watching, and he must have noticed. aLook all you want,a he said gently. aThereas no shame in wanting to look, and the way youare looking at me just makes me want you more. This is as much your body to look at as yours is mine. Iam all yours, sweetheart.a The heavy sac of his t.e.s.t.i.c.l.es rested against his thighs, the long, stiff c.o.c.k jutting from a nest of soft, dark curls, midnight like those on his head. The outline of his hip suggested he had as fine an a.s.s as shead always suspected from surrept.i.tious study of it when he was clothed.
aDid you know that I looked, sometimes?a She couldnat take her gaze away, and in a spontaneous gesture, she wet her lips.
He groaned, gave her a half laugh. aYeah, I did. A lot of times I caught you eyeing my a.s.s. Once I caught you studying my crotch.a Her gaze shot up, sparking, and he laughed outright. aWell, you did. It was the airline contract.a aWell, those were very tedious negotiations,a she defended herself. She was getting cold. She wanted him here, on her again, to feel that comfortable, solid weight pressing her into the couch. aYou donat have to remove the watch.a aYes, I do. It can catch a nipple or a hair unexpectedly, and I donat want to cause you a moment more of discomfort than I have to. Savannah, have you ever used anything inside of yourself? A vibrator?a At her confused look, he explained, in a husky voice. aI need to know how tight youall be, honey. So I donat hurt you.a She shook her head, flushing. aOf course not. Good grief, Matt, I have a houseful of domestic staff. What would they think if they heard it orafound it?a He smiled, propped an arm on the couch and came back down on her with an animal-like deftness that took her breath. He used his knee to nudge her a little further apart, and then put the other hand between them, stroking through her l.a.b.i.a, finding her slick and warm. Savannah gasped on a moan, and his eyes darkened.
aWhat will they think the first time I take you to bed there, make you scream and tear the wallpaper because I have your wrists cuffed between the slats of the headboard? Ah, sweet Christ, your p.u.s.s.y just rippled against my touch. Feel me, baby.a And he slid his fingers into her, slow, pressing upward so she felt the flesh of his palm against her c.l.i.t as he explored her p.u.s.s.y.
aMatt.a She gripped his biceps, holding on, her neck straining, her head against his shoulder as her body struggled beneath him.
aBeg your Master to take you, Savannah. Tell me you belong to me again.a A lifetime of distrust somehow had no ability to withstand the flood of emotion that his words evoked, the overwhelming l.u.s.t gripping her body, a different intensity than even what she had experienced with his men. That had been physical, she realized. This was more, a longing for fulfillment on all levels.
Now she understood what Jon had meant, the pleasure that would be ten times greater than anything else that had occurred tonight, if she recognized and accepted it. Surrender. Love. Full submission to the man she loved, an intense emotional and physical pleasure like shead never known swamping her at the simple verbal declaration.
But she had one last holdout, one last need to be met, and she would ask it, because she knew now she could trust his answer.
She managed to get her hands from his arms up to his neck, caressing his jaw, so their eyes were locked in a moment that was simple, mutual absorption.
aIf I tell you that, will you keep me, forever and ever? Never leave me? Never leave me in any way, never stop loving me?a Please donat be my father. Donat live in the same house and let your heart not be there.
He took his fingers from her, making her shudder, and closed his hand on one of hers, laying it to his heart. aI will never leave you, not in any way, Savannah,a he said, his voice laden with emotion. aFrom today forward, for all eternity. Youare marrying me this weekend. Iam never going to let you know loneliness again. Thereas a diamond ring in the pocket of my slacks, and itas going on your finger before you leave this office tonight. That was my gift.a The tears welled up then and as he bent to kiss one off her cheek, he shifted, his eyes still locked on hers, and his c.o.c.k seated itself in her channel, just the head. Her muscles closed around him in a fist of reaction, tightening his features. aDonat tense up, honey.a aWhoas tense?a she gasped. aPlease Matt, just do it. I need you inside me now.a He slid his arm under her waist, tilting her up to him, and nodded. aHold onto my shoulders, then.a She did, spurred by the hoa.r.s.eness of his tone, the obvious desire for her expressed by every part of him, even parts she could not see, but could feel, surrounding her, empowering her.
Her pa.s.sageway was ready for him, but he eased in, using small strokes. She felt in wonder the sensations of his flesh brushing her inner thighs, the hard flesh of his abdomen, his soft hair rubbing against her belly and chest. She slid one hand down, following the plane of his back, and curved her fingers over his b.u.t.tock, digging her nails into him in reaction as he stroked her again.
He growled, his body tensing under her touch, and he came all the way into her in one inexorable deep stroke, a claiming she gladly welcomed, binding her to him.
She could hear her fatheras voice in her head. Itas what all men want, Savannah. A womanas capitulation to their desires. Itas a hunt, a game to us, a deadly game. Once they win, they may indulge you or even themselves that their emotions are involved, but that pa.s.ses.
Head never allowed for the reality of love, and so, being a good daughter, shead never allowed herself to believe in it. But she knew now her womanas heart must have protected some tiny spark of belief, like a fairy captured inside her hard ironclad soul, and kept alive all these years by the things shead noted subconsciously. The old couple walking hand in hand in the park, not part of a slick diamond commercial, but real. The always painful sight of a young father in the office, holding his wife protectively and proudly in the circle of his arm as he introduced the new baby daughter to his co-workers. Or in the hospital, when her father was dying, she remembered a room where two men sat, one dying of AIDS, the other holding his hand, rubbing ice on his dry lips.
Shead only touched her father when he was in the final coma, beyond consciousness. Shead briefly held his hand, wondering if shead feel a tightening of his grip. If she had, she knew it would have been a physical reflex only, but she could have pretended it was a response to her.
The flowers, the times Matt had called, the time at the funeral, those had been gentle insinuations into her life. A taming more than a hunt, teaching her patiently to trust him, so when he chose to claim her, she walked willingly into his arms, into his thrall.
aSay it again,a she said softly. aSay it so my heart will hear it.a He had stilled within her to give her time to adjust, and he pressed his cheek to hers, his breath in her ear. aYouare mine, Savannah. Now and always.a He withdrew slightly, then moved back in, and pleasure rippled through her abdomen. She raised her legs higher, tightening them over his hips, drawing him deeper. He filled her everywhere with this act of joining, and it was so easy, so clean. She wrapped her arms more tightly around his shoulders, feeling all his power, now all hers, as much as she was his, as he raised his hips, lowered, raised, lowered. Controlling her, sliding along her pa.s.sage, building up a fire that had the power of a detonation. He was deliberately teasing it to the surface, making her cling tighter, her breath growing harsher against his neck. Her nails dug in again and her teeth as well, tasting his heated flesh, the cord of muscle along the line of his broad shoulder.
aThatas it,a he muttered. aLet it go.a What had occurred earlier was earth-shattering, on the field of matter. This was a feeling beyond anything she had ever known or imagined, this incredible emotional and physical coupling. She had no experience to know if casual s.e.x felt like this, but if so, she was sure s.e.x done in love would kill the partic.i.p.ant. This had to be love. Had to be. In their entire relationship, shead never known Matt to lie to her about anything.
If he said he loved her, he did.
aLet go, honey,a he urged again. aTrust me. Let go. Youare mine, all mine, and Iall never let you go.a Her arms held him tighter.
aYouare so strong and fragile both,a he said. aSo delicate. Such soft curves, your hair against my face, your perfume. Iave never been so aware of a woman.a aNever?a She thought of the many shead seen him with, though she knew shead been out with a similar number of men and theyad meant nothing to her.
He raised his head. aNever, Savannah. This is the way it is for a man in love. Youare in control of my destiny now. Youare a G.o.ddess to me, but youare also terrifyingly mortal. I couldnat stand losing you.a aBut what ifaa She bit her lip as he moved, and his eyes gleamed with amus.e.m.e.nt and l.u.s.t, as she struggled to get the words out, to meet his playful challenge. aWhat about in five years? When you know everything about me?a He groaned, half chuckled as she tightened muscles on him, testing her own power. aHow could any woman think that revealing herself to a man would destroy her mystery, her allure?a He bent, caught her lips, touched them with his tongue, spoke against her mouth. aLove has a million rooms to discover, sweetheart, and Iall spend the next ten lifetimes and not know everything about you. Iall only crave more.a Her body trembled on the precipice. In her mind, she saw the old couple again, the young parents, the gay couple soon to be parted by death. People bound together willingly, to share all the moments good and bad. Because that was what life was about. Not strategies and concessions, deals and coups. She saw her fatheras face, saw its coldness and lack of understanding. Saw it at the end, crumpled in pain, the shields that had kept him from the knowledge of love the only thing left intact.
What Matt offered might be Purgatory or Heaven, but she was willing to risk either to escape her cold, emotionless room in h.e.l.l.
aEnough talk,a Matt whispered, and he began to move in her again. Long, slow strokes, one arm beneath her body, holding her to him so she felt him pressed all along the length of her, his thighs rubbing the inside of hers. She pressed her face into his neck, heard the rasp of his breath against her ear as he lifted and lowered his hips, and her hands crept down, felt his b.u.t.tocks clench, release, clench, release with each slow pump into her. Her body trembled, swept by heat, and her breath began to match his rapid rhythm.
aYour p.u.s.s.y knows its Master, doesnat it, Savannah?a aYesayesaa She couldnat hold her head up, dropped it back, and his mouth took her throat as she felt her hair brush her shoulder blades. G.o.d, he was so powerful, so all-consuming. Ah, G.o.da aTake me, Matt. Please make me yours, all yours.a His strokes grew stronger, his gaze more intent, never leaving the clasp of hers, and as the pleasure swept up through her, inhibitions left and she said the words head said shead say, words she wanted to say, just as the climax began to break over her.
aI am yours, Master. Youare myaMasteraa It was a swirling tornado of images and emotions and physical completion, all spinning her up into the relentless fist of the o.r.g.a.s.m. His relentless body stroked her without breaking rhythm, nothing to stop the flow of a tidal wave up through her p.u.s.s.y and lower abdomen, spearing out through her limbs, making her clutch him even more tightly, cry out against his skin, seeing their bodies bathed in the flickering light of the muted television sets. The screens had picked up this moment, so she saw the two of them on the couch, the muscles rippling along his back, b.u.t.tocks and thighs as her slender legs clamped around him, her fingers digging into his shoulders.
aYes, baby. Let me hear you.a Her voice was a long, smooth utterance, like a wolf howling in low, urgent demand, her need for her mate calling him to her. Everything she longed for was in that one, prolonged note of desire. And as her hands tightened on him, Mattas body stiffened and then slammed forward into her urgently, over and over. His grip shifted to the couch arm so he did not shove her head into the arm with the force of his movements, his rapid pistoning into her, the hot spill of his seed inside her womb.
He had chosen not to use any protection, she realized, and that too was another statement of his claim on her. A very significant one.
He came to a gradual slow halt, keeping up slow strokes that made her mewl with pleasure, until at last he stilled, laid his forehead against hers. She reached up, cupped the back of his head in her hands, felt the damp line of perspiration on his nape.
Her heart was so full, she wanted to give him something, something head know she was giving to him, sealing her belief in his words, his desire for her.
aI read it last year.a Matt raised his head, looked down at her. He curled her in the crook of his arm, turned them so he was lying on his back and she was in the shelter of his arm on the wide couch. He touched her faintly smiling lips and she saw it coaxed a smile from his own. aWhat?a aThe Grinch. Thatas how I knew about the Who Mouses. I was Christmas shopping and there was a storytelling hour going on in the corner of the bookstore. I lingered in the shelves nearby and listened to it. So I guess I didnat technically read it. I heard it read.a She reached up, surrounded him with her arms and squeezed. A hug. A basic, wonderful hug he reacted to by closing his own arms around her and hugging her back.
With a groan, he hauled them both to a sitting position, moved her so she was cradled against his lap, her bottom down against his wet c.o.c.k, which stirred against her as he snugged her down on it.
aYouareaa A faint blush rose in her cheeks.