My answer caught him off guard and he looked startled, casting a quizzical look at Mother, who shrugged as though to say, Nothing to do with me, even though they were her words I was parroting.
"I see," he said. "Well, your mother is no doubt pleased to hear your espouse such views, Elise, for in this matter she and I are not in full agreement. Like you she believes in change. Myself, I know that that monarch is appointed by G.o.d and I believe that a corrupt monarch can be persuaded to see the error of his ways."
Another quizzical look and a shrug and I moved quickly on. "But there are other Templars, Papa?"
He nodded. "Across the world, yes. There are those who serve the Order. Those who are sympathetic to our aims. However, as you and your mother discovered today, we have enemies, too. Just as we are an ancient order hoping to shape the world in our image, so there is an opposing order, one with as many adherents sensitive to their own aims. Where we hope to unburden the good-thinking people of the responsibility of choice and be their guardians, this opposing order invites chaos and gambles on anarchy by insisting man should think for himself. They advocate casting aside traditional ways of thinking that have done so much to guide humanity for thousands of years in favor of a different kind of freedom. They are known as a.s.sa.s.sins. We believe it was a.s.sa.s.sins who attacked you today."
"But, monsieur, I heard you say you weren"t sure . . ."
"I said that purely in order to quench the warlike thirst of some of the more vocal members of our Order. It can only be a.s.sa.s.sins who attacked you, Elise. Only they would be so bold as to kill Jean and send a man to kill the wife of the Grand Master. No doubt they hope to destabilize us. On this occasion they failed. We must make sure that if they try again, they fail again."
I nodded. "Yes, Father."
He glanced at Mother. "Now, I expect your mother"s defensive actions today came as a surprise to you?"
They hadn"t. That "secret" encounter with the wolf had seen to that.
"Yes, monsieur," I said, catching Mother"s eye.
"These are skills that all Templars must have. One day you will lead us. But before that you will be initiated as a Templar, and before that you will learn the ways of our Order. Starting tomorrow you will begin to learn combat."
Again I caught Mother"s eye. I had already begun to learn combat. I had been learning combat for over a year now.
"I realize this may be a lot to take in, Elise," continued Father as my mother colored slightly. "Perhaps you saw your life as being similar to other girls of your age. I can only hope the fact that it will be so different is not a source of anxiety for you. I can only hope you embrace the potential you have to fulfill your destiny."
I"d always thought I wasn"t like the other girls. Now I knew for sure.
vii.
The following morning Ruth dressed me for a walk in the grounds. She fussed and tutted and mumbled under her breath that I shouldn"t be taking such risks after what had happened yesterday, how we only just escaped the evil man who had attacked us; and how Mother and I might be lying dead in that alleyway but for the mysterious gentleman who had been pa.s.sing, who saw off the robber.
So that was what the staff had been told. Lots of lies, lots of secrets. It thrilled me to know that I was one of only two people-well three, I suppose, if you counted the doctor-who knew the full truth of what had happened yesterday, one of a select number who knew it was Mother who had dealt with the attack, not some mystery man-and one of the select few who knew the full extent of the family business, not to mention my own part in it.
I had awakened that morning with sunshine in my life. At last all those verites cachees I"d been asked to keep made sense. At last I knew why it was that our family seemed so different from the others, why I myself had never fitted in with the other children. It was because my destiny lay along a different path from theirs, and always had.
And best of all, "Your mother shall be your tutor in all things," Father had said with a warm smile at Mother, who in turn had reflected his love to me. With a smile he stopped himself. "Well, perhaps not in all things. Perhaps in matters of beliefs, you would be better advised to heed the words of your father the Grand Master."
"Francois," Mother had chided, "the child shall make up her own mind. The conclusions she reaches shall be her own."
"My love, why do I have the distinct impression that for Elise, today"s events are not the surprise they might have been?"
"What do you think we ladies talk about in our perambulations, Francois?"
"Shoes?"
"Well, yes," she conceded, "we do indeed talk about shoes, but what else?"
He understood, shaking his head, wondering how he could have been so blind as to miss what had been happening right under his nose.
"Did she know about the Order before today?" he asked her.
"Not as such," she said, "though I daresay she was prepared for the revelation."
"And weapons?"
"She has had a little training, yes."
Father indicated for me to stand. "Let"s see if you have learned your en garde, Elise," he said, adopting the position himself, his right arm outstretched and forefinger pointed like a blade.
I did I was as I was told. Father shot an impressed look at my mother and studied my posture, walking around me as I bathed in the glow of his approval. "Right-handed like her father"-he chuckled-"not a lefty like her mother."
I bounced slightly on my knees, checking my balance, and my father smiled once more. "Do I detect the hand of a certain Englishman in our daughter"s training, Julie?"
"Mr. Weatherall has been helping me in filling Elise"s extracurricular hours, yes," she agreed airily.
"I see. I had thought we were seeing a little more of him than usual at the chteau. Tell me, does he still hold a torch for you?"
"Francois, you embarra.s.s me," chided Mother.
(At the time I had no idea what they meant, of course. But I do now. Seeing Mr. Weatherall the other night, a broken man. Oh, I do now.) Father"s face became serious. "Julie, you know I trust you in all things and if you have been tutoring the child, then I support you in that, too, and if what she"s already had helped Elise keep a cool head during yesterday"s attack, then it"s been more than justified. But Elise will be Grand Master one day. She will follow in my footsteps. In matters of combat and tactics she may be your protege, Julie, but in matters of belief, she must be mine. Is that understood?"
"Yes, Francois." Mother smiled sweetly. "Yes, that is understood."
A look pa.s.sed between Mother and me. An unspoken verite cachee.
viii.
And so, having escaped Ruth"s unnecessary concern, I arrived in the reception hall ready for my walk with Mother.
"You will take Scratch, and the guards, please, Julie," Father told her in a tone of voice that brooked no argument.
"Of course," she said, and indicated one of the men who lurked in the shadows of the reception hall, our whole house feeling a little more crowded all of a sudden.
He came forward. It was Mr. Weatherall. For a second he and Father regarded one another carefully, before Mr. Weatherall bowed deeply and the two shook hands.
"Francois and I have told Elise what lies in store for her," said my mother.
Mr. Weatherall"s eyes slid from my father"s face to mine and he nodded before bowing deeply again, extending his palm to kiss the back of my hand, as though I were a princess.
"And how does that make you feel, young Elise, knowing that one day you will lead the Templars?"
"Very grand, monsieur," I said.
"I"ll bet it does," he said.
"Francois has correctly guessed that Elise has been receiving a little training," said Mother.
Mr. Weatherall turned his attention back to Father. "Of course," he said, "and I trust my tutelage has not given the Grand Master offense?"
"As I explained last night, I trust my wife implicitly concerning such matters. I know that with you, Freddie, they are in good hands."
Just then Olivier approached, maintaining a distance until he was ushered forward to whisper in his master"s ear. Father nodded and addressed Mother.
"I must take my leave, my dear," said Father. "Our "friends" are here to visit."
The Crows, of course. They had returned for a morning of shouting. And it was funny how knowing what I did cast my father in a new light. He wasn"t just my father anymore. Not just my mother"s husband. But a busy man. A man of responsibility, whose attention was constantly required. A man whose decisions changed lives. The Crows were entering as we left, politely greeting Mother and Mr. Weatherall, crowding into the reception hall, which was suddenly very busy and alive with more talk of avenging yesterdays" attack, seeing to it that Jean had not died in vain.
Eventually we stepped outside, the three of us, and walked for some way before Mr. Weatherall spoke. "So, Elise, how do you really feel knowing your destiny?" asked Mr. Weatherall.
"As I said with Father," I told him.
"Not a little apprehensive, then, petal? All that responsibility to come?"
"Mr. Weatherall feels you too young to know your destiny," explained Mother.
"Not at all. I look forward to finding what the future holds, monsieur," I replied.
He nodded, as if that was good enough for him.
"And I like that I get to do more sword fighting, monsieur," I added. "With no secrecy now."
"Exactly! We shall work on your riposte and your envelopment and you may show off your skills to your father. I think he"ll be surprised, Elise, what an accomplished swordswoman you already are. Perhaps one day you shall be a better swordsman and than either your mother or your father."
"Oh, I doubt that, monsieur."
"Freddie, please don"t put strange ideas into the girl"s head." Mother nudged me and whispered, "Though I think he may be right, Elise, just between you and me."
Mr. Weatherall became serious. "Now. Are we going to talk about what went on yesterday?"
"An attempt on our lives, Freddie . . ."
"I only wish I had been there . . ."
"No matter that you were not, Freddie, we remain unharmed and barely even traumatized by the incident. Elise acquitted herself perfectly, and . . ."
"You were the lioness protecting her young, eh?"
"I did what I had to do. It is a matter of regret that one of the men escaped."
Mr. Weatherall stopped. "One of the men? What? There was more than one?"
She gave him meaningful eyes. "Oh yes. There was another man, the more dangerous of the two. He used a hidden blade."
His mouth formed an O. "So it really was the work of a.s.sa.s.sins?"
"I have my doubts."
"Oh yeah? Why?"
"He ran, Freddie. Have you ever known an a.s.sa.s.sin to run?"
"They are merely human and you are a formidable opponent. I think I should have been tempted to run myself in his shoes. You"re a right devil with that boot knife." He glanced back at me with a wink.
Mother glowed. "You may be a.s.sured your flattery does not go unappreciated, Freddie. But this man, there was something about him that wasn"t quite right. He was all . . . show. He was an a.s.sa.s.sin, the hidden blade was proof of that. But I wonder, was he a true a.s.sa.s.sin?"
"We need to find him, ask him."
"Indeed we do."
"Tell me, what did he look like?"
Mother gave him a description of the doctor.
". . . and there is something else."
"Yes?"
She led us to the hedges. Last night as we escaped the alley she had scooped up the doctor"s bag to take with us on the carriage ride home. Before arriving back at the chteau, she had me run and hide it, and she handed it to Mr. Weatherall now.
"He left this, did he?"
"Indeed. He used it to carry a blade but there"s nothing else inside."
"Nothing to identify him?"
"There is something . . . Open it. See the label inside?"
"The bag was made in England," said Mr. Weatherall, surprised. "An English a.s.sa.s.sin?"
Mother nodded. "Possibly. Very possibly. Do you not think it plausible that the English might want me dead? I made it plain to Madame Carroll that I favored a change of monarchy."
"But also that you oppose bloodshed."
"Quite. And Madame Carroll seemed to think that was enough for her Order. Perhaps not, though."
Mr. Weatherall shook his head. "I can"t see it myself. I mean, putting my own national loyalty to one side, I can"t see what"s in it for them. They see you as a moderating influence on the Order as a whole. Killing you risks destabilizing that."
"Perhaps it"s a risk they were willing to take. Either way an English-made doctor"s bag is the only clue we have as to the ident.i.ty of the a.s.sa.s.sin."
Mr. Weatherall nodded. "We will find him, Madame," he told her. "You can be sure of that."
That, of course, was three years ago. And of the doctor there has been no sight or sound since. The attempt on our lives has disappeared into history, like paupers swallowed up by the Paris fog.
13 APRIL 1778.
i.
I want her to get better. I want there to be a day when the sun shines and her maids enter to open her drapes only to find her sitting up in bed, "feeling quite revived," and I want the sun that floods through her drapes to crowd its way into the hallways of our darkened home and chase away the grief-ridden shadows lurking there, touch Father, restore him and bring him back to me. I want to hear songs and laughter from the kitchen again. I want an end to this contained sadness and I want my smile to be real, no longer masking a hurt that churns inside.