He then carried over the baskets and a freezer of ice cream. He had brought a fruit salid, cold chicken, potatoe Chips, cake and ice-cream.
It was a delightful Repast, and not soon to be forgotten by the Corps.
Mademoiselle got out of the Adams"s car and came over, although she had her own lunch as usual. She then had the Chauffeur carry over a seat cushion, and to see her one would beleive she was always pleasant. I have no use for those who are only pleasant in the presence of Food or Strangers.
Carter Brooks sat beside me, and observed:
"You see, Bab, although a Slacker myself, I cannot bear that such brave spirits as those of the Girls" Aviation Corps should go hungry."
I then gave him a talking-to, saying that he had been a great disapointment, as I thought one should rise to the Country"s Call and not wait until actualy needed, even when an only son.
He made no defence, but said in a serious tone:
"You see, it"s like this. I am not sure of myself, Bab. I don"t want to enlist because others of the Male s.e.x, as you would say, are enlisting and I"m ashamed not to. And I don"t want to enlist just to wear a Unaform and get away from business. I don"t take it as lightly as all that."
"Have you no Patriotism?" I demanded. "Can you repeat unmoved the celabrated lines:
"Lives there a man with Soul so dead, He (or who) never to himself hath said: This is my own, my Native Land."
I then choked up, although being Captain I felt that tears were a femanine weakness and a bad Example.
Mademoiselle had at that moment felt an ant somewhere and was not looking. Therfore she did not perceive when he reached over and put his hand on my foot, which happened to be nearest to him. He then pated my foot, and said:
"What a nice kid you are!"
It is strange, now that he and the baskets, etcetera, have gone away, that I continue to think about his pating my foot. Because I have known him for years, and he is nothing to me but a good friend and not sentamental in any way.
I feel this way. Suppose he enlists and goes away to die for his Country, as a result of my Speach. Can I endure to think of it? No. I did not feel this way about Tom Gray, who has gone to Florida to learn to fly, although at one time thinking the Sun rose and set on him. It is very queer.
The Sentry reports Mr. Schmidt and the dogs coming over the fense.
EVENING. Doctor Connor is here again. He is taking Sis to a meeting where he is to make a Speach. I ofered to go along, but they did not apear to hear me, and perhaps it is as well, for I must watch William, as Henry is taking them in the car. I am therfore writing on the stairs, as I can then hear him washing Silver in the pantrey.
Mother has been very sweet to me this evening. I cannot record how I feel about the change. I used to feel that she loved me when she had time to do so, but that she had not much time, being busy with Bridge, Dinners, taking Leila out and Housekeeping, and so on. But now she has more time. Tonight she said:
"Bab, suppose we have a little talk. I have been thinking all day what I would do if you were a boy, and took it into that Patriotic head of yours to enlist. I couldn"t bear it, that"s all."
I was moved to tears by this afection on the part of my dear Parent, but I remembered being Captain of the Corps, and so did not weep. She then said that she would buy us an Emblem for the Camp, and have a luncheon packed each day. She also ofered me a wrist watch.
I cannot but think what changes War can make, bringing people together because of worry and danger, and causing gifts, such as flags and watches, and ofering to come out and see us in a day or so.
It is now 9 P. M. and the mention of the flag has reminded me that our own Emblem still fluters beneath the Starry Sky.
LATER: William is now in the Garage. I am watching from the window of the sowing room.
The terrable thought comes--has he a wireless concealed there, by which he sends out clandestine messages, perhaps to Germany?
This I know. He cannot get into Henry"s room, as the padlock is now on.
LATER: He has returned, foiled!
APRIL 18TH. Nothing new. Working hard at signaling. Mr. Schmidt says I am doing well and if he was an Officer he would give me a job.
APRIL 19TH. Nothing new. But Doctor Connor had told Leila that my father looks sick or at least not well. When I went to him, being frightened, as he is my only Male Parent and very dear to me, he only laughed and said:
"Nonsense! We"re rushed at the Mill, that"s all. You see, Bab, War is more than Unaforms and saluting. It is a nasty Business. And of course, between your forgetting The Emblem until midnight, when I am in my first sleep, and putting it out at Dawn, I am not getting all the rest I really need."
He then took my hand and said:
"Bab, you haven"t by any chance been in my Dis.p.a.ch Case for anything, have you?"
"Why? Is something missing?" I said in I startled tone.
"No. But sometimes I think--however, never mind about that. I think I"ll take the Case upstairs and lock my door hereafter, and if the Emblem is an hour or to late, we will have to stand for it. Eight o"clock is early enough for any Flag, especialy if it has been out late the night before."
"Father" I said, in a tence voice. "I have before this warned you, but you would not listen, considering me imature and not knowing a Spy when I see one."
I then told him what I knew about William, but he only said:
"Well, the only thing that matters is the Pa.s.sword, and that cannot be stolen. As for William, I have had his record looked up by the Police, and it is fine. Now go to bed, and send in the Spy. I want a Scotch and Soda."
APRIL 20TH. Henry and I have searched the Garage, but there is no Wireless, unless in a Chimney. Henry says this is often done, by Spies, who raise a Mast out of the chimney by night.
To night I shall watch the Chimney, as there is an ark light near it, so that it is as bright as Day.
The cook has given notice, as she and William cannot get along, and as he can only make to salids and those not cared for by the other servants.
APRIL 27TH. After eight days I am at last alowed this Log or Journal, being supported with pillows while writing as Doctor Connor says it will not hurt me.
He has just gone, and I am sure kissed Leila in the hall while Hannah and the nurse were getting pen, ink, etcetera. Perhaps after all Romanse has at last come to my beloved sister, who will now get married. If so, I can come out in November, which is the best time, as December is busy with Xmas and so on.
How shall I tell the tradgic story of that night? How can I put, by means of a pen, my Experiences on paper? There are some things which may not be written, but only felt, and that mostly afterwards, as during the time one is to excited to feel.
On April 21st, Sat.u.r.day, I had a bad cold and was not allowed to go to camp. I therfore slept most of the day, being one to sleep easily in daytime, except for Hannah coming in to feel if I was feverish.
My father did not come home to dinner, and later on telephoned that he was not to be looked for until he arived, owing to somthing very important at the Mill and a night shift going on for the first time.
We ate Dinner without him, and mother was very nervous and kept saying that with foremen and so on she did not see why father should have to kill himself.
Ye G.o.ds! Had we but realised the Signifacance of that remark! But we did not, but went to living in a Fool"s Paradice, and complaining because William had put to much vinigar in the French Dressing.
William locked up the house and we retired to our Chambers. But as I had slept most of the day I could not compose myself to Slumber, but sat up in my robe de nuit and reflected about Carter Brooks, and that perhaps it would be better for him not to enlist as there is plenty to be done here at home, where one is safe from bullets, machine guns and so on.