Babbitt

"You waited long enough!"

"Well, you know how it is. Figured you wouldn"t want to see a friend of his for quite some time and--Sit down, honey! Let"s be sensible. We"ve all of us done a bunch of things that we hadn"t ought to, but maybe we can sort of start over again. Honest, Zilla, I"d like to do something to make you both happy. Know what I thought to-day? Mind you, Paul doesn"t know a thing about this--doesn"t know I was going to come see you. I got to thinking: Zilla"s a fine? big-hearted woman, and she"ll understand that, uh, Paul"s had his lesson now. Why wouldn"t it be a fine idea if you asked the governor to pardon him? Believe he would, if it came from you. No! Wait! Just think how good you"d feel if you were generous."

"Yes, I wish to be generous." She was sitting primly, speaking icily.

"For that reason I wish to keep him in prison, as an example to evil-doers. I"ve gotten religion, George, since the terrible thing that man did to me. Sometimes I used to be unkind, and I wished for worldly pleasures, for dancing and the theater. But when I was in the hospital the pastor of the Pentecostal Communion Faith used to come to see me, and he showed me, right from the prophecies written in the Word of G.o.d, that the Day of Judgment is coming and all the members of the older churches are going straight to eternal d.a.m.nation, because they only do lip-service and swallow the world, the flesh, and the devil--"

For fifteen wild minutes she talked, pouring out admonitions to flee the wrath to come, and her face flushed, her dead voice recaptured something of the shrill energy of the old Zilla. She wound up with a furious:

"It"s the blessing of G.o.d himself that Paul should be in prison now, and torn and humbled by punishment, so that he may yet save his soul, and so other wicked men, these horrible chasers after women and l.u.s.t, may have an example."

Babbitt had itched and twisted. As in church he dared not move during the sermon so now he felt that he must seem attentive, though her screeching denunciations flew past him like carrion birds.

He sought to be calm and brotherly:

"Yes, I know, Zilla. But gosh, it certainly is the essence of religion to be charitable, isn"t it? Let me tell you how I figure it: What we need in the world is liberalism, liberality, if we"re going to get anywhere. I"ve always believed in being broad-minded and liberal--"

"You? Liberal?" It was very much the old Zilla. "Why, George Babbitt, you"re about as broad-minded and liberal as a razor-blade!"

"Oh, I am, am I! Well, just let me tell you, just--let me--tell--you, I"m as by golly liberal as you are religious, anyway! YOU RELIGIOUS!"

"I am so! Our pastor says I sustain him in the faith!"

"I"ll bet you do! With Paul"s money! But just to show you how liberal I am, I"m going to send a check for ten bucks to this Beecher Ingram, because a lot of fellows are saying the poor cuss preaches sedition and free love, and they"re trying to run him out of town."

"And they"re right! They ought to run him out of town! Why, he preaches--if you can call it preaching--in a theater, in the House of Satan! You don"t know what it is to find G.o.d, to find peace, to behold the snares that the devil spreads out for our feet. Oh, I"m so glad to see the mysterious purposes of G.o.d in having Paul harm me and stop my wickedness--and Paul"s getting his, good and plenty, for the cruel things he did to me, and I hope he DIES in prison!"

Babbitt was up, hat in hand, growling, "Well, if that"s what you call being at peace, for heaven"s sake just warn me before you go to war, will you?"

III

Vast is the power of cities to reclaim the wanderer. More than mountains or the sh.o.r.e-devouring sea, a city retains its character, imperturbable, cynical, holding behind apparent changes its essential purpose. Though Babbitt had deserted his family and dwelt with Joe Paradise in the wilderness, though he had become a liberal, though he had been quite sure, on the night before he reached Zenith, that neither he nor the city would be the same again, ten days after his return he could not believe that he had ever been away. Nor was it at all evident to his acquaintances that there was a new George F. Babbitt, save that he was more irritable under the incessant chaffing at the Athletic Club, and once, when Vergil Gunch observed that Seneca Doane ought to be hanged, Babbitt snorted, "Oh, rats, he"s not so bad."

At home he grunted "Eh?" across the newspaper to his commentatory wife, and was delighted by Tinka"s new red tam o"shanter, and announced, "No cla.s.s to that corrugated iron garage. Have to build me a nice frame one."

Verona and Kenneth Escott appeared really to be engaged. In his newspaper Escott had conducted a pure-food crusade against commission-houses. As a result he had been given an excellent job in a commission-house, and he was making a salary on which he could marry, and denouncing irresponsible reporters who wrote stories criticizing commission-houses without knowing what they were talking about.

This September Ted had entered the State University as a freshman in the College of Arts and Sciences. The university was at Mohalis only fifteen miles from Zenith, and Ted often came down for the week-end. Babbitt was worried. Ted was "going in for" everything but books. He had tried to "make" the football team as a light half-back, he was looking forward to the basket-ball season, he was on the committee for the Freshman Hop, and (as a Zenithite, an aristocrat among the yokels) he was being "rushed" by two fraternities. But of his studies Babbitt could learn nothing save a mumbled, "Oh, gosh, these old stiffs of teachers just give you a lot of junk about literature and economics."

One week-end Ted proposed, "Say, Dad, why can"t I transfer over from the College to the School of Engineering and take mechanical engineering?

You always holler that I never study, but honest, I would study there."

"No, the Engineering School hasn"t got the standing the College has,"

fretted Babbitt.

"I"d like to know how it hasn"t! The Engineers can play on any of the teams!"

There was much explanation of the "dollars-and-cents value of being known as a college man when you go into the law," and a truly oratorical account of the lawyer"s life. Before he was through with it, Babbitt had Ted a United States Senator.

Among the great lawyers whom he mentioned was Seneca Doane.

"But, gee whiz," Ted marveled, "I thought you always said this Doane was a reg"lar nut!"

"That"s no way to speak of a great man! Doane"s always been a good friend of mine--fact I helped him in college--I started him out and you might say inspired him. Just because he"s sympathetic with the aims of Labor, a lot of chumps that lack liberality and broad-mindedness think he"s a crank, but let me tell you there"s mighty few of "em that rake in the fees he does, and he"s a friend of some of the strongest; most conservative men in the world--like Lord Wycombe, this, uh, this big English n.o.bleman that"s so well known. And you now, which would you rather do: be in with a lot of greasy mechanics and laboring-men, or chum up to a real fellow like Lord Wycombe, and get invited to his house for parties?"

"Well--gosh," sighed Ted.

The next week-end he came in joyously with, "Say, Dad, why couldn"t I take mining engineering instead of the academic course? You talk about standing--maybe there isn"t much in mechanical engineering, but the Miners, gee, they got seven out of eleven in the new elections to Nu Tau Tau!"

CHAPTER XXVII

I

THE strike which turned Zenith into two belligerent camps; white and red, began late in September with a walk-out of telephone girls and linemen, in protest against a reduction of wages. The newly formed union of dairy-products workers went out, partly in sympathy and partly in demand for a forty-four hour week. They were followed by the truck-drivers" union. Industry was tied up, and the whole city was nervous with talk of a trolley strike, a printers" strike, a general strike. Furious citizens, trying to get telephone calls through strike-breaking girls, danced helplessly. Every truck that made its way from the factories to the freight-stations was guarded by a policeman, trying to look stoical beside the scab driver. A line of fifty trucks from the Zenith Steel and Machinery Company was attacked by strikers-rushing out from the sidewalk, pulling drivers from the seats, smashing carburetors and commutators, while telephone girls cheered from the walk, and small boys heaved bricks.

The National Guard was ordered out. Colonel Nixon, who in private life was Mr. Caleb Nixon, secretary of the Pullmore Tractor Company, put on a long khaki coat and stalked through crowds, a .44 automatic in hand.

Even Babbitt"s friend, Clarence Drum the shoe merchant--a round and merry man who told stories at the Athletic Club, and who strangely resembled a Victorian pug-dog--was to be seen as a waddling but ferocious captain, with his belt tight about his comfortable little belly, and his round little mouth petulant as he piped to chattering groups on corners. "Move on there now! I can"t have any of this loitering!"

Every newspaper in the city, save one, was against the strikers. When mobs raided the news-stands, at each was stationed a militiaman, a young, embarra.s.sed citizen-soldier with eye-gla.s.ses, bookkeeper or grocery-clerk in private life, trying to look dangerous while small boys yelped, "Get onto de tin soldier!" and striking truck-drivers inquired tenderly, "Say, Joe, when I was fighting in France, was you in camp in the States or was you doing Swede exercises in the Y. M. C. A.? Be careful of that bayonet, now, or you"ll cut yourself!"

There was no one in Zenith who talked of anything but the strike, and no one who did not take sides. You were either a courageous friend of Labor, or you were a fearless supporter of the Rights of Property; and in either case you were belligerent, and ready to disown any friend who did not hate the enemy.

A condensed-milk plant was set afire--each side charged it to the other--and the city was hysterical.

And Babbitt chose this time to be publicly liberal.

He belonged to the sound, sane, right-thinking wing, and at first he agreed that the Crooked Agitators ought to be shot. He was sorry when his friend, Seneca Doane, defended arrested strikers, and he thought of going to Doane and explaining about these agitators, but when he read a broadside alleging that even on their former wages the telephone girls had been hungry, he was troubled. "All lies and fake figures," he said, but in a doubtful croak.

For the Sunday after, the Chatham Road Presbyterian Church announced a sermon by Dr. John Jennison Drew on "How the Saviour Would End Strikes."

Babbitt had been negligent about church-going lately, but he went to the service, hopeful that Dr. Drew really did have the information as to what the divine powers thought about strikes. Beside Babbitt in the large, curving, glossy, velvet-upholstered pew was Chum Frink.

Frink whispered, "Hope the doc gives the strikers h.e.l.l! Ordinarily, I don"t believe in a preacher b.u.t.ting into political matters--let him stick to straight religion and save souls, and not stir up a lot of discussion--but at a time like this, I do think he ought to stand right up and bawl out those plug-uglies to a fare-you-well!"

"Yes--well--" said Babbitt.

The Rev. Dr. Drew, his rustic bang flopping with the intensity of his poetic and sociologic ardor, trumpeted:

"During the untoward series of industrial dislocations which have--let us be courageous and admit it boldly--throttled the business life of our fair city these past days, there has been a great deal of loose talk about scientific prevention of scientific--SCIENTIFIC! Now, let me tell you that the most unscientific thing in the world is science! Take the attacks on the established fundamentals of the Christian creed which were so popular with the "scientists" a generation ago. Oh, yes, they were mighty fellows, and great poo-bahs of criticism! They were going to destroy the church; they were going to prove the world was created and has been brought to its extraordinary level of morality and civilization by blind chance. Yet the church stands just as firmly to-day as ever, and the only answer a Christian pastor needs make to the long-haired opponents of his simple faith is just a pitying smile!

"And now these same "scientists" want to replace the natural condition of free compet.i.tion by crazy systems which, no matter by what high-sounding names they are called, are nothing but a despotic paternalism. Naturally, I"m not criticizing labor courts, injunctions against men proven to be striking unjustly, or those excellent unions in which the men and the boss get together. But I certainly am criticizing the systems in which the free and fluid motivation of independent labor is to be replaced by cooked-up wage-scales and minimum salaries and government commissions and labor federations and all that poppyc.o.c.k.

"What is not generally understood is that this whole industrial matter isn"t a question of economics. It"s essentially and only a matter of Love, and of the practical application of the Christian religion!

Imagine a factory--instead of committees of workmen alienating the boss, the boss goes among them smiling, and they smile back, the elder brother and the younger. Brothers, that"s what they must be, loving brothers, and then strikes would be as inconceivable as hatred in the home!"

It was at this point that Babbitt muttered, "Oh, rot!"