My dad walked up and separated Chase and Salvatore, looking at both of them scornfully. Then he looked at me and one look said it all. He realized that the two were fighting over me. There was no way to keep this secret any longer.
Chapter 19.
It didn"t take long for word of what had happened in the coat room to spread and only minutes later, Chase, Salvatore, and I found ourselves behind closed doors with my parents and Chase"s parents frowning at us all, looking at us as if we were a bunch of Barbarians. Maybe we were. The secret was out and it was time to explain.
Chase was eager to come out of the situation like the good guy and he went first. "I"m sorry that this happened. Taylor and I had broken up and I was so heartbroken, so desperate to get her back. Then tonight...after all this," he said, pointing around, "she told me she was with Salvatore."
"You"re what?" My mom shouted loudly.
"Yes, Salvatore and I are together," I said. It was so scary saying that out loud and I saw many angry faces staring back at me and worst of all, my dad"s, which was startled and saddened by it.
"You two were broken up?" Chase"s mother repeated, clenching her jaw and looking angrier than I had ever seen her look.
"Yes, Mother. I"m sorry," Chase said.
"This is unacceptable. First you make our family look like fools in front of our friends and embarra.s.s us with your behavior. You"ve tarnished this special event."
My mom just kept shaking her head, repeating, "Unbelievable," the entire time Chase"s mother was talking. The two fathers were surprisingly quiet, taking the more a.n.a.lytical approach and likely already going into damage control.
"And you," Chase"s mother said, turning to my parents. "You knew they"d broken up and you said nothing. I am in shock. Your daughter"s been tramping around with a child and you two didn"t even know. I"m appalled and I can a.s.sure you that I will be doing everything within my power to make sure the scholarship doesn"t go to Taylor."
My mom was interrupting now, saying she"d had no idea. She"d never condone such a thing.
"Stop!" Salvatore finally exclaimed. "Taylor did nothing wrong. It was all me. You mustn"t be angry with her."
My dad stepped in next. "I think it is best that we all go," he said quietly. My mother shook her head and didn"t say another word. She was trying to maintain her composure, but I could see that she was more devastated than she"d ever been before.
With our coats in hand, we all walked out of the country club, trying to avoid all the eyes that were on the First family and Salvatore. Then we waited silently for the valet to come. I"d never been so excited to get into a car before and hide. I just wanted the mess that I"d created to go away.
Not a word was said until we were home. Dad spoke first, trying to take control of the situation like he might a crisis at work. "Salvatore, I must call your parents and tell them what happened, but that you are alright," he said.
"I can do that, sir," Salvatore said, looking down and feeling as dejected as I felt at that moment. We were trying to remain strong, but it wasn"t working out well.
Dad walked to his office and Salvatore and I found ourselves alone with my mother. She was looking at me and I saw she was trying to calm down and maintain her composure, but when she spoke you could hear her voice quivering from the built up anger. "I just cannot believe you"d do this, Taylor. It"s scandalous and despite what this boy says, you abused your responsibilities. You threw everything away and may have caused irreparable damage to our family, and to poor Chase. I just can"t imagine what he must be going through."
"I am sorry, Mrs. First, but please don"t blame Taylor. It truly was my responsibility to be a better house guest," Salvatore said.
"I should say so," my mother replied, tossing her decorum to the side.
Then Dad came back in. "Salvatore, your parents are on the way and will be calling when they land in DC."
"Oh," Salvatore replied.
"I say we end this evening now," Dad said.
I nodded my head, feeling so low. I wanted to say something to Salvatore, but it was made clear that neither Mom nor Dad were going to give us an opportunity to be alone. I smiled at Salvatore and said, "I"ll see you tomorrow morning."
"Goodnight," Salvatore said. Then he turned to my parents and added, "I truly am sorry for any harm I may have caused this family." Then he walked out and my heart felt just as sunken as if he"d just boarded the plane back to Italy.
Word travels fast when something bad happens in my town. By morning, Allison had already texted me, demanding to know the dirt, and when I went to get my hair done I saw plenty of people looking at me and murmuring under their breaths. I wasn"t sure if it was paranoia, but I was pretty sure I"d heard words like hussy, molester, tramp, and other nasty insults being said. The one that really stung was molester. Salvatore was eighteen and I was nineteen, yet everyone was acting like we were eons apart in age. I knew that I"d have to deal with their judgment of me and that I did deserve it. I"d been untruthful and it had created a horrible mess. However, Salvatore shouldn"t have to be trash talked just because of what I did. Although he was too gentlemanly to do it, I just wished he"d play the victim. It would have cleared my conscience.
When it came to my parents and what they were thinking, I wasn"t really certain. I didn"t know if they were ready to accept that Salvatore and I were together and move on, or if they were hoping that when he left the entire thing would be done. I didn"t want to lose Salvatore and the thought of us parting ways on such a terrible note devastated me.
As my day of intense critiquing and scrutinizing over my "abuse of authority" came to an end the night was just beginning. It didn"t involve sleep. I was preparing to face the next line of fire-Salvatore"s parents.
They came over to the house and I realized that I was about to meet two people whose respect I"d hoped to have someday and they already had a tarnished, unfavorable first impression of me before even a.s.sessing what I looked like.
I sat there silently as Salvatore told his parents what was going on and he told them that he loved me and wanted to be with me. His only regret was the damage he caused the First family, for they had been very kind.
"Love her?" Salvatore"s father said, leaning forward. He stared into his son"s eyes and then glanced at me. I looked back, unsure if I should smile or look serious. I"d never been so self-conscious before about how I was acting and what I was doing.
"Yes, Father," he said. "I love her."
"And what about Clarissa?" Salvatore"s mother asked.
I looked at Salvatore, wondering who Clarissa was.
"That is for you, more than it is for me. Yes, she"s lovely, but..."
"But nothing. Our families have an agreement, one that you should respect and you shall honor," Salvatore"s mother said.
Salvatore looked so shocked to hear what they said and I was more shocked than him. I felt like I"d just been punched in the gut by Mike Tyson. He had a girlfriend back in Italy and hadn"t bothered to tell me about it. It was apparently a serious girlfriend, too. I couldn"t believe it.
Salvatore"s father stood up and stared down at Salvatore. "You two say your goodbyes. This will end tonight and I don"t want to hear anything else about it."
"I couldn"t agree more," my mother said.
Dad shook his head, looking at me with such sadness. I knew he was struggling between my happiness and the harsh reality of the situation. Then he turned to Salvatore"s father and said, "Why don"t we go to my study and talk things through."
The two men went off and although I knew she didn"t want to do it, my mom took Salvatore"s mother into the parlor to chat...some forced conversation to ease their pain.
As soon as we had a moment alone I leaned in to Salvatore and spoke quietly. "You had a girlfriend? So, this really was just about summer s.e.x, but you wanted to make it look like I was the one who was doing something wrong. I really didn"t expect that from you. Chase warned me, but..."
Salvatore interrupted. "It"s not like that, Taylor. Clarissa is who my parents chose and her parents chose. We"re not who each other has chosen."
"Then why stay together?"
"That is how many marriages happen among influential Italian families. I don"t know how to make you understand, but it"s not easy to just be bold and say you won"t do it when everyone expects it of you."
"Actually, Salvatore, I do understand that. It may be a different culture, but that"s the situation I was in. I just don"t know what to do. I love you, too, but we have too many odds going against us."
"So, tomorrow we shall appear to be friends, but in my heart I will know that it is love that I have for you," Salvatore said.
"And I"ll know the same," I added.
I wanted to kiss him so badly and it apparently set off some sort of radar because both our sets of parents suddenly reappeared in the kitchen.
"Come Salvatore, we"re going to stay at the room you"ve been paying for at the Ritz Carlton," his father said.
"What?" my mother asked, looking so confused. Then her face blanched as she realized why Salvatore might have had that room. Aside from the day I found him there, we"d never been back there.
Everyone left with a forced pleasant atmosphere lingering in the air and when the door was shut, I turned to go to my room. I didn"t want to say another word.
Dad called out to me and I turned around. "The business will be fine, Taylor, but this thing you have-whatever it is-must be done. Understood?"
"I understand. He has a girlfriend anyway and is going back to Italy soon," I replied. I walked into my bedroom and poured out my eyes, falling asleep with my dress still on and lying on top of the bed. I woke in the morning feeling so miserable that I couldn"t stand it.
Chapter 20.
It was just two days until Salvatore was leaving and all of the things that had happened pretty much had squashed out any s.e.xual desires we had for each other-or at least that I had for him. Every time I saw him thoughts in my mind would ring out, calling me a pervert, a molester, a disappointment to my family, and an embarra.s.sment to the town or at least to the First name. I knew I"d get over it eventually, but it was so hard to deal with. The only thing more frightening to me in my life was when my dad had his heart attack. Other than that, this situation was one of the most harrowing things I"d ever experienced.
Salvatore had been to the office, but with his parents as they got their tour and were introduced to all the staff. I was there, too, but it was very different than what it had been before. The only person that seemed to have any compa.s.sion for me was Mary, my dad"s right hand lady.
"I"m sorry you"re going through a tough time, Taylor. Hang in there. It"ll all work itself out."
"Thanks," I said, but I choked up and couldn"t say anymore. My eyes welled up with tears and I thought I was going to have another breakdown. The crying jags were getting better though; I hadn"t had one for nearly six hours.
I walked back to my office and my mom came in a short time later. "We"re all going to go to lunch, Taylor. Come on."
"Mom, I just don"t know if it"s a good idea."
"It"s all over and done with now, Taylor. Everything will be fine and you"ll just have to ride it out. I have a feeling that you"ve learned quite the lesson here, but it"ll all work out. Remember Dotty...her husband had an affair with his secretary and it was the scandal of the town for ages, but now n.o.body thinks about it."
"That"s because they"re thinking of me," I protested.
"Don"t be a martyr. Get your purse. Let"s go." My mom walked out, showing that her word was final and there were no negotiations to be had.
I got up and we all walked outside to the car. My dad had his three row SUV and we all piled in. Salvatore and I in the way back, our moms in the middle, and our dads in the front. We smiled at each other, both showing love in our eyes, but also so apprehensive. I longed to see that look I"d grown so used to in Salvatore.
Once we sat down to eat, we somehow got on the topic of my attending Harvard, something I hadn"t even begun pursuing the past few days. I hadn"t given it a second thought even, not even sure if the scholarship would still be available.
"It"s going to be such a wonderful experience for you at Harvard, Taylor. An opportunity to really learn a lot about their business program and walk away prepared to take over my end of things."
"Dad, I"m not sure that I"ll be going there. It just doesn"t seem right."
"Are you worried about the scholarship? Don"t worry, I talked with Chase"s parents and they are still offering it, despite it all."
"It"s not that," I replied.
"It had better not be because of my heart, Taylor. I will be fine." My dad looked at me sternly.
I sighed and my dad continued talking. "You will have all the time in the world to learn the business and run the business after college. It"s a once in a lifetime opportunity and you can"t pa.s.s it up. I won"t let you do it."
"Your father"s right," Salvatore said.
Great! Now I had them both vying against me. This was another situation in which I was likely to give in. The only difference was that if I were to be truly honest with myself, I"d have to admit that I did want to go to Harvard. I"d worked hard for that opportunity for many years.
"Yes," Salvatore"s father said. "Its reputation even reaches the sh.o.r.es of Italy." He nodded his head to emphasize is point.
"I"m not even sure if my acceptance papers are still good. That was over a year ago," I said.
"They are," my mom replied. "I got a call from them yesterday. I had to give them some updated information, but you"re good to go."
"Well, I guess everyone is set for me to be Boston bound in a few weeks," I said.
n.o.body answered, but the smiles on my parents" faces gave their answer. His parents seemed pleased at the idea of me not being quite so accessible.
And then there was Salvatore. I looked at him and knew him well enough to know that he was thinking of what it would be like in the morning when he took off with his parents to return to Italy. Would we ever see each other again? We certainly weren"t going to get a chance to say a proper goodbye because we were still being watched closely. Our parents had turned into hawks, instinctually knowing when their young were even thinking about doing something goofy and swooping in to stop any additional catastrophes from taking place.
So, I hadn"t antic.i.p.ated it but by the end of lunch my fate was determined. I was Boston bound in a few short weeks. I wasn"t able to focus or get anything done for the rest of the afternoon at work. I was thinking about college and I was dreading the end of the work day. That would be the last time that I got to see Salvatore for who knows how longmaybe forever. Despite all that had happened, I loved him and wanted to be with him. Neither of us had been perfect and it showed me how challenging a true relationship could be. Honestly, we probably didn"t stand a chance with an ocean separating us, not to mention two busy schedules.
I stared at the clock. It was 5:30 p.m. I got up and walked out into the common area of the building, on the far side from my office, and stood there. No one else was there quite yet and I just looked around.
Five minutes later, my parents and Salvatore, along with his parents, came into the area and everyone began to say their farewells. I looked at Salvatore and didn"t care what they said. I was going to hug him one last time and feel his body in my arms like I had all those joyful nights. I leaned in and hugged him tightly. He whispered, "I love you," and I whispered it back.
Then his family walked out of the building and I couldn"t stop staring until he was out of sight. This time when I turned around I found myself alone, truly alone for the first time in a very long time. My heart was left aching and filled with love that I would never experience again.
Epilogue.
That night I couldn"t sleep. I stared out of my bedroom window at the stars in the sky and could see small blinking lights from airplanes that were taking people to places they wanted or needed to be. Perhaps someone else was watching like I was, wondering why the planes also took away those they loved, and creating great distances and loneliness.
Would I recover from what I was feeling? Yes, I thought I would, but I couldn"t help but feel robbed of an experience I should have been able to enjoy. If only I"d done things the right way, maybe it would have been different.
I sighed and traced my finger on the window sill. I had so many "if only" thoughts running through my head at that moment that I was bound to drive myself crazy.
I blew a kiss into the nighttime sky and said, "Goodbye, Salvatore. When we meet again, I hope my heart is healed."
Then I went to sleep, drifting off into the dreams of the pleasurable places he"d taken my body to in this one unforgettable, life changing summer I"d just experienced.