"But what is it?"
"I--I won"t tell you to-night."
"Then when will you tell me?"
Isaacson hesitated. His face was blazing with expression. He looked like a man powerfully stirred--almost like a man on the edge of some outburst.
"I won"t tell you to-night," he repeated.
"But you must tell me."
"At the proper time. You asked me at dinner what had been the matter with you, what illness you had been suffering from. You observed that I didn"t care to tell you then. Well, I"ll tell you before you get rid of me."
"Get rid of you!"
"Yes, yes. Don"t think I misunderstand what you"ve been trying to tell me to-night. You want to convey to me in a friendly manner that now I"ve accomplished my work it"s time for me to be off."
Nigel was deeply hurt.
"Nothing of the sort!" he said. "It was only that my wife had made me understand what a terrible loss to you remaining out here at such a time must be."
"There is something I must make you understand, Armine, before I leave you. And when I"ve told you what it is, you can give me the only compensation I want, and I want it badly--badly!"
"And you won"t tell me what it is now?"
"Not to-night--not in a hurry."
He got up.
"When are you expecting Mrs. Armine back?" he asked.
"In four nights. She wants a couple of full days in Cairo. Then there are the two night journeys."
"I"ll tell you before she comes back."
Isaacson turned round, and strolled away into the darkness of the garden.
When he was alone there, he tacitly reproached himself for his vehemence of spirit, for the heat of his temper. Yet surely they were leading him in the right path. These words of Nigel had awakened him to the very simple fact that this a.s.sociation must come to an end, and almost immediately. He had been, he supposed now, drifting on from day to day, postponing any decision. Mrs. Armine was stronger than he. From her, through Nigel, had come to him this access of determination, drawn really from her decision. As he knew this, he was able secretly to admire for a moment this woman whom he actively hated. Her work in the dark would send him now to work in the light.
It was inevitable. While he had believed that very possibly her departure to Cairo was a flight from her husband, Isaacson had had a reason for his hesitation. If Bella Donna vanished, why torture Nigel further? Let him lose her, without knowing all that he had lost. But if she were really coming back, and if he, Isaacson, must go--and his departure in any case must shortly be inevitable--then, cost what it might, the truth must be told.
As he paced the garden, he was trying to brace himself to the most difficult, the most dreadful duty life had so far imposed upon him.
When he went back to the terrace, Nigel was no longer there. He had gone up to bed.
The next day pa.s.sed without a word between the two men on the subject of the previous night. They talked on indifferent topics. But the cloud of mutual reserve once more enveloped them, and intercourse was uneasy.
Another day dawned.
Mrs. Armine had now been away for two nights, and, if she held to her announced plan, should leave Cairo on her return to Luxor on the evening of the following day. No letter had been received from her. The question in Isaacson"s mind was, would she come back? If he spoke and she never returned, he would have stabbed his friend to the heart for no reason.
But if she did return and he had not spoken?
He was the prey of doubt, of contending instincts. He did not know what to do. But deep down within him was there not a voice that, like the ground swell of the ocean, murmured ever one thing, unwearied, persistent?
Sometimes he was aware of this voice and strove not to hear it, or not to heed it, this voice in the depths of a man, telling him that in the speaking of truth there is strength, and that out of weakness no good ever came yet, nor ever will come till the end of all things.
But the telling of certain truths seems too cruel; and how can one be cruel to a man returning to life with almost hesitating steps?
Perhaps something would happen to decide the matter, something--some outside event. What it might be Isaacson could not say to himself.
Indeed, it was almost childish to hope for anything. He knew that. And yet, unreasonably, he hoped.
And the event did happen, and on that day.
Late in the afternoon a telegram arrived for Nigel. Ibrahim brought it out to the terrace where the two men were together, and Nigel opened it with an eagerness he did not try to disguise.
"It"s from her," he said. "She starts to-night, and will be here to-morrow morning early. She"s in such a hurry to be back that she"s only staying the one night in Cairo."
He looked across to Isaacson, who seemed startled.
"Is there anything the matter with you?" he asked.
"No. Why?"
"You don"t look quite yourself."
"I feel perfectly well."
"Oh!"
Almost directly Isaacson made an excuse and got away. His decision was made. There was no more combat within him. But his heart was heavy, was sick, and he felt an acute and frightful nervousness, such as he could imagine being experienced by a man under sentence of death, who is not told on what day the sentence will be carried out. Apprehension fell over him like an icy rain in the sultry air.
He walked mechanically to the bank of the Nile.
To-day the water was like a sheet of gla.s.s, dimpled here and there by the wayward currents, and, because of some peculiar atmospheric effect, perhaps, the river looked narrower than usual, the farther bank less far off. Never before had Isaacson been so forcibly struck by the magical clearness of Egypt. Even in the midst of his misery, a misery which physically affected him, he stood still to marvel and to admire.
How near everything looked! How startlingly every detail of things stood out in this exquisite evening!
Presently his eyes went to the _Loulia_. She, too, looked strangely near, strangely distinct. He watched her, only because of that at first, but presently because he began to notice an unusual bustle on board. Men were moving rapidly about both on the lower and on the upper deck, were going here and there ceaselessly.
One man swarmed up the long and bending mast. Another clambered over the balcony-rail into the stern.
What did all this movement mean?
The master of the _Loulia_ must surely be expected--the man Isaacson had seen driving the Russian horses, and, clothed almost in rags, squatting in the darkness of the hashish cafe in the entrails of Cairo.
And Bella Donna was hurrying back after only one night in Cairo!
Isaacson forgot the marvellous beauty of the declining day. In a few minutes he returned to the house. But immediately after dinner, leaving Nigel sitting on the terrace, he went again to the bank of the Nile.