"You do not mean to answer my question, then?"
"No, sir. Do not ask me to do so, for I cannot."
"Very well. Get ready for tea. Mr. Lockhart is here. One word more.
You need fear no further interference from anyone."
He walked on, and, glad to be released, Beulah hastened to her own room, with a strange feeling of joy on entering it again. Harriet welcomed her warmly, and, without alluding to her absence, a.s.sisted in braiding the heavy ma.s.ses of hair, which required arranging. Half an hour after, Dr. Hartwell knocked at the door, and conducted her downstairs. Mrs. Chilton rose and extended her hand, with an amicable expression of countenance for which Beulah was not prepared. She could not bring herself to accept the hand, but her salutation was gravely polite.
"Good-evening, Mrs. Chilton."
Mr. Lockhart made room for her on the sofa; and, quietly ensconced in one corner, she sat for some time so engaged in listening to the general conversation that the bitter recollection of by-gone trials was entirely banished. Dr. Hartwell and his friend were talking of Europe, and the latter, after recounting much of interest in connection with his former visits, said earnestly:
"Go with me this time, Guy; one tour cannot have satiated you. It will be double, nay, triple, enjoyment to have you along. It is, and always has been, a mystery to me why you should persist in practicing. You do not need the pecuniary aid; your income would enable you to live just as you pleased. Life is short at best. Why not glean all of pleasure that travel affords to a nature like yours? Your sister was just telling me that in a few days she goes North to place Pauline at some celebrated school, and, without her, you will be desolate. Come, let"s to Europe together. What do you say?"
Dr. Hartwell received this intimation of his sister"s plans without the slightest token of surprise, and smiled sarcastically as he replied:
"Percy, I shall answer you in the words of a favorite author of the day. He says, "It is for want of self-culture that the superst.i.tion of traveling, whose idols are Italy, England, Egypt, retains its fascination for all educated Americans. He who travels to be amused, or to get somewhat which he does not carry, travels away from himself, and grows old, even in youth, among--old things. In Thebes, in Palmyra, his will and mind have become old and dilapidated as they. He carries ruins to ruins. Traveling is a fool"s paradise. At home I dream that at Naples, at Rome, I can be intoxicated with beauty and lose my sadness. I pack my trunk, embark, and finally wake up in Naples, and there beside me is the stern fact, the sad self, unrelenting, identical, that I fled from. I affect to be intoxicated with sights and suggestions, but I am not. My giant goes with me wherever I go." Percy, I endeavored to drown my giant in the Mediterranean; to bury it forever beneath the green waters of Lago Maggiore; to hurl it from solemn, icy, Alpine heights; to dodge it in museums of art; but, as Emerson says, it clung to me with unerring allegiance, and I came home. And now, daily and yearly, I repeat the hopeless experiment, in my round of professional duties.
Yes, May and Pauline are going away, but I shall have Beulah to look after, and I fancy time will not drag its wheels through coming years. How soon do you think of leaving America? I have some commissions for you when you start."
"I hope I shall be able to go North within a fortnight, and, after a short visit to Newport or Saratoga, sail for Havre. What do you want from the great storehouse of art, sculpture, and paintings, cameos and prints?"
"I will furnish you with a catalogue. Do you go through Germany, or only flaunt, b.u.t.terfly-like, under the sunny skies of the Levant?"
"I have, as yet, no settled plans; but probably before I return shall explore Egypt, Syria, and Arabia. Do you want anything from the dying world? From Dendera, Carnac, or that city of rock, lonely, silent, awful Petra?"
"Not I. The flavor of Sodom is too prevalent. But there are a few localities that I shall ask you to sketch for me."
Subsequently, Mr. Lockhart requested Beulah to sing her forest song for him again. The blood surged quickly into her face, and, not without confusion, she begged him to excuse her. He insisted, and tried to draw her from her seat; but, sinking further back into the corner, she a.s.sured him she could not; she never sang, except when alone. Dr. Hartwell smiled, and, looking at her curiously, said:
"I never heard her even attempt to sing. Beulah, why will you not try to oblige him?"
"Oh, sir! my songs are all connected with sorrows. I could not sing them now; indeed, I could not." And as the memory of Lilly, hushed by her lullaby, rose vividly before her, she put her hands over her eyes and wept quietly.
"When you come home from your Oriental jaunt, she will be able to comply with your request. Meantime, Percy, come into the study; I want a cigar and game of chess."
Beulah quitted the parlor at the same time, and was mounting the steps, when she heard Mr. Lockhart ask:
"Guy, what are you going to do with that solemn-looking child?"
"Going to try to show her that the world is not altogether made up of brutes." She heard no more; but, long after she laid her head upon the pillow, pondered on the kind fate which gave her so considerate, so generous a guardian; and, in the depths of her grat.i.tude, she vowed to show him that she reverenced and honored him.
CHAPTER XIII
Three years pa.s.sed swiftly, unmarked by any incidents of interest, and one dreary night in December Beulah sat in Dr. Hartwell"s study, wondering what detained him so much, later than usual. The lamp stood on the tea-table, and the urn awaited the master"s return. The room, with its books, statues, paintings, and melodeon, was unaltered, but time had materially changed the appearance of the orphan. She had grown tall, and the mazarine blue merino dress fitted the slender form with scrupulous exactness. The luxuriant black hair was combed straight back from the face, and wound into a circular knot, which covered the entire back of the head, and gave a cla.s.sical outline to the whole. The eyelashes were longer and darker, the complexion had lost its sickly hue, and, though there was no bloom on the cheeks, they were clear and white. I have spoken before of the singular conformation of the ma.s.sive brow, and now the style in which she wore her hair fully exposed the outline. The large gray eyes had lost their look of bitterness, but more than ever they were grave, earnest, restless, and searching; indexing a stormy soul. The whole countenance betokened that rare combination of mental endowments, that habitual train of deep, concentrated thought, mingled with somewhat dark pa.s.sion, which characterizes the eagerly inquiring mind that struggles to lift itself far above common utilitarian themes. The placid element was as wanting in her physiognomy as in her character, and even the lines of the mouth gave evidence of strength and restlessness, rather than peace.
Before her lay a book on geometry, and, engrossed by study, she was un.o.bservant of Dr. Hartwell"s entrance. Walking up to the grate, he warmed his fingers, and then, with his hands behind him, stood still on the rug, regarding his protegee attentively. He looked precisely as he had done more than three years before, when he waited at Mrs.
Martin"s, watching little Johnny and his nurse. The colorless face seemed as if chiseled out of ivory, and stern gravity, blended with bitterness, was enthroned on the lofty, unfurrowed brow. He looked at the girl intently, as he would have watched a patient to whom he had administered a dubious medicine and felt some curiosity concerning the result.
"Beulah, put up your book and make the tea, will you?"
She started up, and, seating herself before the urn, said joyfully:
"Good-evening! I did not know you had come home. You look cold, sir."
"Yes, it is deucedly cold; and, to mend the matter, Mazeppa must needs slip on the ice in the gutter and lame himself. Knew, too, I should want him again to-night." He drew a chair to the table and received his tea from her hand, for it was one of his whims to dismiss Mrs. Watson and the servants at this meal, and have only Beulah present.
"Who is so ill as to require a second visit to-night?"
She very rarely asked anything relative to his professional engagements, but saw that he was more than usually interested.
"Why, that quiet little Quaker friend of yours, Clara Sanders, will probably lose her grandfather this time. He had a second paralytic stroke to-day, and I doubt whether he survives till morning."
"Are any of Clara"s friends with her?" asked Beulah quickly.
"Some two or three of the neighbors. What now?" he continued as she rose from the table.
"I am going to get ready and go with you when you return."
"Nonsense! The weather is too disagreeable; and, besides, you can do no good; the old man is unconscious. Don"t think of it."
"But I must think of it, and what is more, you must carry me, if you please. I shall not mind the cold, and I know Clara would rather have me with her, even though I could render no a.s.sistance. Will you carry me? I shall thank you very much." She stood on the threshold.
"And if I will not carry you?" he answered questioningly.
"Then, sir, though sorry to disobey you, I shall be forced to walk there."
"So I supposed. You may get ready."
"Thank you." She hurried off to wrap up for the ride and acquaint Mrs. Watson with the cause of her temporary absence. On re-entering the study she found the doctor lying on the sofa, with one hand over his eyes. Without removing it he tossed a letter to her, saying:
"There is a letter from Heidelberg. I had almost forgotten it. You will have time to read it; the buggy is not ready." He moved his fingers slightly, so as to see her distinctly, while she tore off the envelope and perused it. At first she looked pleased; then the black eyebrows met over the nose, and as she refolded it there was a very decided curl in the compressed upper lip. She put it into her pocket without comment.
"Eugene is well, I suppose?" said the doctor, still shading his eyes.
"Yes, sir; quite well."
"Does he seem to be improving his advantages?"
"I should judge not, from the tone of this letter."
"What does it indicate?"
"That he thinks of settling down into mercantile life on his return; as if he needed to go to Germany to learn to keep books." She spoke hastily and with much chagrin.
"And why not? Germany is par excellence the land of book-making, and book-reading; why not of bookkeeping?"