"I decided not to see this as my sister"s house, but as the house of my friend Jeanette Fulbright, a warm and generous person who cares for me."
"And Jeanette?"
286 Sabrina thought a moment. This one was harder to explain.
"I don"t know exactly how to say it, but Jeanette wasn"t very open when I first moved here. She was easily shocked and put off by things. No, that"s not true. She was put off by people, and I didn"t know what to do about that. It"s only been recently that I felt I could have Crystal come here. And now that I do, I don"t know if there"s a reason to move."
"I can see the softening in her," Rylan agreed. "Have you told her you"ve noticed changes?"
"No, but I think I should."
"So you really are all right with being here?"
"Very much so."
"Good, because I want you here until we marry. The shop is closer to my house, but I just like having you here. I like knowing you"re a part of this put-together family."
Sabrina nodded, very content, but her heart was also doing funny things in her chest. Rylan had mentioned marriage. Sabrina didn"t want to say anything, but her mind was going to that topic more and more. It was simply lovely to know that Rylan"s mind was on the same thing. Not that she doubted. It was just very nice to hear.
Heather sat in the conservatory and wrote in the journal she"d started not many days after Theta"s funeral. She could not believe how much she missed Theta Holden, and something inside of her needed to remember the little things she had learned over the years. She needed to remember the big things G.o.d had taught her along the way as well. She wrote furiously at some times, and slowly at others. It helped to be in the room she was sure Theta called her own.
It was fruitless to speculate about what Theta might have been thinking, but Heather was not the same person for having known her. If it took her years, she was determined to write Theta"s story, at least as seen through her own eyes.
287 "We have to talk," Jeanette said, having tracked Becky down on the second Sunday she"d joined them at church. She was in the kitchen as usual.
Becky looked at her but didn"t speak.
"Why, Becky? Why after all these years?" she asked, not needing to be more specific.
Becky looked out the window for a long moment, her eyes on the garden. When she began to speak, she kept her gaze there.
"I"m not a young woman anymore, Jeanette. I always thought I would make time for G.o.d later, but suddenly time moved away. Theta"s gone, and to me it feels like she just got here. And Bri," Becky started but took some time to find the words. "She"s not selfish, and I am. She shames me."
"I don"t think of you as selfish. You do for others all the time."
"But that"s to please myself, Jeanette." Becky finally looked at her. "I have to get to church before I grow any more selfish. I have to hear what G.o.d might want to say to me."
Jeanette could have wept on the spot. She had never pressed Becky to come to church, but had always made her welcome clear. And then Theta had come to them, and Heather as well. Heather was vocal about her beliefs, and Becky had wasted no time volunteering for Sunday morning duty. It had seemed to make her content, and Jeanette had let time take over.
"I love you, Becky," Jeanette took a risk in saying, knowing the other woman did not like to hear such sentiments.
Becky swallowed several times. Jeanette wanted to give her privacy if she needed to cry, so she turned away.
"I love you, Jeanette." The words were whispered so softly that she barely heard them, but hear them she did. Jeanette stopped just long enough so that Becky knew the message got through and then continued on her way.
288 "How does it look?" Sabrina asked Jeanette on Thursday, holding up a very large shirt in blue chambray.
"Very nice," Jeanette praised her, standing next to her as she sat at the machine. Sabrina had used her own money to buy the fabric, and Jeanette had taught her how to use the sewing machine. She had just finished the shirt for Rylan, hoping it would fit and that he would be pleased.
"I think you need to deliver this," Jeanette suggested. Sabrina smiled before asking, "Can you spare me?"
"Go on," Jeanette ordered. "I"m quite certain you"ll find him at the livery."
"I"ll try to be right back."
"Sure you will," Jeanette said, and Sabrina had to laugh. Just remembering to have her wrap it in paper, Jeanette sent her on her way.
Rylan said when Sabrina reached the wide doorway, having spotted her coming up the street. "Making a delivery?"
"I am." Sabrina held the wrapped garment out. "Here you go, Pastor Jarvik."
"Jeanette finished my shirt," he said, even as he reached for the parcel.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes," he smiled. "I wore it on Sunday."
"I think you"re mistaken," Sabrina argued, trying to look convincing. "You"d best open it."
Rylan was thankful that his hands were not covered in grease, or worse. He tore the paper back and saw the blue shirt.
"Did you make this?" he asked, holding it out for inspection and liking it very much.
289 Sabrina nodded.
"With the machine?"
Again the nod, her smile a little shy.
Rylan bent toward her but didn"t kiss her. "This was a terrible place to open a gift. Half the town is probably watching."
Sabrina looked into his eyes and whispered, "Does that matter?" Rylan didn"t hesitate. He bent the rest of the way and kissed her on the mouth, both of them looking much too pleased.
"One of these day I"m going to have a question to ask you," Rylan said.
"I"ll be sure and have an answer," Sabrina said in return, and then forced herself to say, "I have to get back."
"My loss," Rylan said, his eyes warm.
Sabrina gave him one more smile and went on her way. She got back to the little blue dress shop without mishap, but if she"d been pressed, she could not have said how.
Timothy had Sunday off, so Rylan put Jeanette"s two-seat wagon together for their ride to the ranch. Sabrina had insisted that Jeanette take the front seat, so she was in the back with Heather and Becky. Becky had gone again to church but not spoken to anyone about what she"d heard.
"I love this drive," Heather said when they were partway there.
"Isn"t it beautiful?" Jeanette agreed. "I remember when Theta and Wes bought the ranch. I hadn"t been much out of town before then, and it was such a treat for Owen and me to come this way."
Jeanette spoke of Theta often. It seemed to be her way of honoring her sister"s memory and easing the pain. It was also nice for the rest of them, who didn"t always know the stories she told.
"Look at all the wagons!" Sabrina said, not realizing how many folks were ahead of them on the drive. Rylan pulled their wagon under the Holden Ranch archway, and the fun began.
290 "I"ve been looking for you," Rylan said to Sabrina when dinner was over. They had laughed, talked, and eaten for nearly two hours, and now the games were getting started. Rylan and Sabrina had planned to sit together but gotten into conversations and been drawn apart.
"What"s up?" Sabrina asked.
"Let"s go for a walk," Rylan invited, his hand coming out.
"Are we allowed to do that when the games are about to begin?" Sabrina asked, even as she took his hand and gladly went along.
They both had long legs, and in no time at all were a ways away from the group. The hills rose all around them, but there was a knoll that Rylan wanted to climb, and they talked as they started that way.
"Do you have a favorite verse in each chapter of Colossians?" Sabrina asked.
"Let me think," Rylan said as they climbed, still holding hands. "I don"t know if I have one in each chapter, but I have several." "Which ones?"
"Well, I can tell you one that I pray about a lot is Colossians 1:7, which says, "As ye also learned of Epaphras, our dear fellow servant, who is for you a faithful minister of Christ." I often pray that verse and ask G.o.d that I would be a faithful minister of Christ and a servant. I would love it if others could say that of me."
"I think they can," Sabrina said, and Rylan thanked her. "What"s your favorite part of preaching?" she suddenly asked.
"Well, the study of the Word is beyond compare, but I also love the looks on folks" faces when a new truth hits home. It"s wonderful to watch. In fact I had a hard time with you at the beginning."
"Why was that?"
"So many thoughts are wondrous to you, and your face shows it all."
291 "I didn"t know that."
"It"s true."
"But not so much now?"
"No," Rylan smiled, "your face still shows it all, but I"m not trying to keep from looking at you these days."
Sabrina laughed and continued to climb. She wasn"t winded, but she was ready to turn and take a look when Rylan tugged on her hand.
"A little higher," he invited, having taken his time and enjoyed every minute. "I think the view to the other side is pretty fun."
Sabrina learned he was right. They got to the top and a small valley fell away, with dips and hollows that made Sabrina want to run down the other side.
"It"s magnificent."
"I thought you might like it," Rylan said, keeping his arm around her shoulders, and wanting to wait until the perfect moment. "Oh, and we have to look back down on the ranch. It"s a great view from here too."
It took a moment for Sabrina to see it. Her eyes took in both houses and the barns, but then she saw it, or rather them. Seemingly every person in the congregation was lying in the field, their bodies spelling out four words: Will you marry me? The question mark was far from perfect, but Sabrina got the message.
"Oh, Rylan," Sabrina laughed, turning to look at him. "You planned this!"
"I certainly did. Have you got an answer?"
"Yes!" she shouted before throwing her arms around the man she loved.
On the ground, the man in charge of the words-Chas Vick-saw the hug and shouted for everyone to move. Rylan didn"t know about this part, but with much laughter and a little too much dust, the con 292 gregation spelled out: Congratulations. They hadn"t organized an exclamation point, but when they all came to their feet and cheered, it was just as good.
Rylan and Sabrina took the fastest route down and were instantly surrounded by folks they loved and who loved them in return. Congratulations were many and heartfelt, and the next hour sped past as the picnic wrapped up and folks headed back to town. Not until Rylan had dropped most of the women off at the front door and taken the wagon back to Jeanette"s barn did the newly engaged couple have time to speak alone.
"Who will marry us?" was Sabrina"s first question.
"I have a friend, Willis Ruggles, who lives in Evers. I think he"ll be happy to come over."
"When?" was her next question, and Rylan had to smile. He"d been wondering the same thing.
"How about we put a few dates into a letter and let Willis let us know."
"I like that idea as long as I have time to make a new dress." "How much time do you need?" Rylan asked.
Sabrina thought about that, knowing Jeanette would help, but also that she still had two jobs to keep track of.
"Does two months put us too close to Christmas?"
"I don"t think so. I think having you for a Christmas present sounds perfect."
And that settled it. Rylan wrote his letter the next day and heard back within the week. Pastor Willis Ruggles would be happy to marry Rylan and Sabrina on December 24, 1881.
"It"s mean out there today," Bret Toben said to Sabrina as November rushed to an end. He had come for tobacco but also took time to linger near the stove. The wind was howling down Main Street, and no one lingered out of doors.
293 "You need a warmer coat," Sabrina told him, still working to organize the mail that had been delivered.
"I understand congratulations are in order," Bret said next, his voice a little flat.
Sabrina glanced at him and kept her thanks brief.
"You don"t look especially pleased," Bret said next, suddenly at the counter.
Sabrina turned then and faced him. "What can I get for you, Mr. Toben?" she asked, not willing to talk with him on a personal level.
"The usual," he said, and took pleasure in having her remember.
Sabrina got his tobacco, and even checked to see if he had mail. Once his coin was on the counter, she stood expectantly, a.s.suming he would leave.
"Am I invited?" Bret asked next, keeping his voice light. "No," Sabrina answered, no sting in her tone.
"Crystal tells me she"s invited."
"That"s true. She is," Sabrina answered, wishing she could hand him off to Jessie, but that lady had actually been talked into taking a few hours off.
Bret nodded, not upset and still impressed by this woman. He genuinely enjoyed talking to her.
"She also told me how you helped her," the saloon owner said. Sabrina nodded, never having told anyone but Rylan and Jeanette.