Chapter 38
I did not know what to say.
He also seemed to be in a similar situation.
While my state of mind was still in chaos, he sent me back to the company’s dormitory. We did not say any word all the way. Even when I got off, he just nodded his head.
I looked at his car being driven away, until it disappeared from view.
On the next morning, it will come as no surprise that two dark circles appeared under my eyes.
Before the music to signal the beginning of a work day was broadcast, I could not help looking several times at his empty office. When it was time to start work, his office was still empty.
President Zhang quickly called me into his office. “Little Nie, did Vice President Lin contact you?”
I shook my head.
“I called his mobile phone but he has switched it off.” President Zhang was feeling a little anxious. He looked at me, but did not ask anything further. Instead he changed the topic to talk about my father. After chatting briefly, he courteously sent me out.
For the whole morning, I looked at my mobile phone several times, but I did not end up making any phone call.
In the afternoon, President Zhang convened a short meeting with the staff in our department. He said to give any recent work directly to him because Vice President Lin was on leave and has gone on a trip.
Only going on a trip ……
My heart was relieved, but there was an indescribable discomfort in the chest.
I made a call to father and used a matter of fact tone to describe the entire incident. Initially, I intended not to add any personal sentiment, but in the end, I cannot help being sarcastic.
“Dad, will this be considered like mother like daughter?”
In those days, Ma Nian Yuan’s mother complained about father’s poor family. Then she got to know a so-called elite. Once Ma Nian Yuan heard Lin Yu Sen had a car accident, she was not even willing to visit him. She took the initiative to tell my dad, probably wanting to act pitiful in front of my dad first. Really annoying, don’t tell me Lin Yu Sen will cling to her and want her to take responsibility?
Really exasperating, ridiculous and extremely hateful.
After a few days, Lin Yu Sen still did not show up. I could not help but starting to think where he would go. Was he alone or went together with a friend?
Could he has gone too far, so simply cannot remember me?
No no – What was I thinking.
However, I cannot control myself and began to inexplicably go online to look at some travel information.
In the blink of an eye, it was Friday. I went with Yin Jie and others to the canteen to have lunch. When I was walking out of the office building, I was stopped by the receptionist at the front desk.
“Nie Xi Guang, there is a letter for you.”
Since the widespread use of email, I have never received paper mail letter any more. Holding the thick envelope in my hand, it has a different feel.
Yin Jie was curious so she moved closer to take a peep: “What kind of letter? Wow, love letter?”
I subconsciously stuffed the letter into my pocket and said casually: “Bank statement.”
Yin Jie immediately lost interest and started to guess what will the canteen be serving today. While I was chatting with her, my hand gripped the letter in the pocket tightly.
While lining up in the canteen, I quietly pulled out part of the letter ——
That natural, smooth and flowing style of handwriting.
Was Lin Yu Sen’s handwriting.
I really controlled myself and did not take a look until after work.
I had already told mother earlier that I will be going home this weekend. Hence I took my stuff and went to the station after work.
I chose to go home by bus.
The coach traveled along the highway from Suzhou to Wuxi. I looked at the extensive road network outside the window and could not help but to think whether Lin Yu Sen had an accident on this stretch of the highway. So what was he thinking when he drove me back, pa.s.sing here last time?
At that time, he must have thought the person sitting next to him, was the one who invited him to come here. Also, the same person who left him in the lurch and caused him to be unable to pick up the scalpel any more.
While thinking about this, I cannot control myself any more and took out the letter which I’ve touched many times from my pocket. Then I carefully opened it.
The envelope was very thick, but mostly postcards, with only one page of writing.
Xi Guang, the first time I saw you was at Madam Yu’s dinner party. That was a dinner party which I did not want to attend. Everything was so boring, I might as well stay at home alone to read the medical magazine. Until I met you.
At that time, you were venting your anger on a girl, thereby attracting the attention of everyone present. Like other onlookers, I should sympathize with that girl who you berated until about to cry, but I was very attracted to you. I just felt that you looked so dazzling.
Was I that aggressive? Probably in a fit of anger, I became overly expressive? When I saw father brought Ma Nian Yuan to G.o.dmother birthday party, I was really angry and mad. Bringing that woman’s child to a relative’s dinner party, how will my mother feel then. Particularly, that girl liked to act pitiful. I did not say anything but she already acting like she was being bullied. Then I might as well really flare up.
I was thinking I must find a way to know this girl. It just so happened that Jia Qi introduced me to his friends, which included you. I am very certain now that you did not pay any attention to me at that time, so did not have the slightest impression of me. I tried to get close to you without being too obvious, but you disappeared from the dinner party very quickly. I thought perhaps I need not be so anxious, I can start preparing a near perfect plan first.
Therefore, a few days later when I received your invitation to view and appreciate plum blossoms, I was simply ecstatic.
That day, I performed a highly successful operation. After finishing off at the operating table, I drove to Wuxi. I never thought, this will be my last time using a scalpel on the operating table.
I had a car accident on the highway.
My injury may not have been life threatening, but I can no longer be a top surgeon. Because in addition to the hand, there is also the eyes. During that time, I was covered with gauze and lying in the hospital bed, thinking whether this is the price I’ve to pay in order to meet that girl? I will not take my anger out on her or harbor a grudge against her. I did not even tell anyone that I had the car accident because I wanted to go and meet her. But why she didn’t even bother to come and visit me once?
In those days when my eyes could behold no light, you became the blight of my heart.
And one that I was never set free from.
Thus, when I heard that you are doing your internship in this company, I left Sheng Yuan’s head office to go to Suzhou. However, I did not expect you not to recognize me at all.
Yes, how can you recognize me since that person who invited me to go to Wuxi was not you.
But Xi Guang, you have always been the one for whom I came.
—— You became the blight of my heart.
I stared blankly at the letter.
Actually, from beginning to end, the one who caused him so much misery was Ma Nian Yuan. In that case, shouldn’t the blight of his heart be Ma Nian Yuan.
No, no, no. This thought had only just begun to take shape before I immediately erased it resolutely from my mind.
How could it be another person? In Lin Yu Sen’s eyes and heart, the person he has always been thinking ——
……
Was me!
“You have always been the one for whom I came.”
It was merely a sentence on a piece of paper, but I can already imagine Lin Yu Sen’s appearance and tone of voice. That kind of gentle and soft, also deep and low voice ……
I unconsciously pressed my face against the ice-cold window of the bus. A strange and never experienced before kind of emotion aroused in my heart, which cannot be considered as happiness, anger, heartbeat or something else.
Suddenly I behaved impetuously and picked up the mobile phone. After searching for his number, my finger pressed the call b.u.t.ton before giving careful consideration. The other side did not give me any chance to back out because the call was quickly picked up.
However both of us also did not say anything. After a long time, I was the one who started talking.
“Lin Yu Sen.”
Only then, he seemed certain it was me, “Xi Guang.”
“I’ve received your letter.”
“Okay.”
“The postcards are very beautiful.”
“It is good that you like them.”
“Are you still travelling around …… approximately when are you coming back?”
There was a pause on the other end: “I am in the train station now and will arrive in Suzhou tomorrow morning.”
“Ah …… going back to Suzhou, usually you’ll pa.s.s by Wuxi …… how about, you get off at Wuxi?”
I did not know why I said those words. After I have said them, I was silent. There was also silence on the other end. After a long time, only then I heard him asked softly: “Xi Guang, are you sure?”
“…… Ah, you’ll reach Wuxi around what time? I’ll go and pick you up.”