She let out a scream of pleasure, holding to him, moving with him. Then, satiated, he collapsed against her, his mouth still at her neck though he no longer fed. Her warm breath touched gently at his throat, sending a quiet calm through him. He didn"t want to move, didn"t want to think about any other moment than the one he was in.
Slowly, very slowly, he spiraled down from his euphoria. Guilt began to creep in, though it came on kitten"s feet, softly, barely noticeable. He wondered about that as he gently pulled away. She lay still, eyes closed, her breathing returning to normal, her swollen lips curved in a smile of utter satisfaction. Baris brushed dark curls from her face and shoulders, then gently kissed her b.r.e.a.s.t.s, throat and lips. She sighed and nestled closer to his warmth. He pulled the blankets over their nude bodies and closed his eyes to sleep.
He woke muzzy-headed and fatigued. Deirdre was snuggled up against him, still asleep. If guilt had come on kitten"s feet the previous night, it now came roaring forward with the force of a lion. Baris let out a heavy sigh of disbelief and stumbled from the bed, waking Deirdre in the process.
"What"s wrong?" she murmured, peering up at him.
"Nothing. I...it"s just time we were up."
"To do what? Can"t we just stay here for a few days, Baris? We can keep a low profile, just go out at night. This city is so exciting. We haven"t even begun to explore all it has to offer."
Baris picked up the robe supplied by the inn and slipped it on before moving to the window to peer out. The streets were already busy and his gaze flicked over the crowd. A dark-haired woman caught his eye and he stared at her for a long time. She reminded him of Anika, his wife, his lover, his soulmate. How could he have done this to her? How could he have forsaken his vows of fidelity like this?
Anger tore through him and he spun from the window, searching for his clothes. Deirdre watched him dress in silence, her unspoken question hanging in the chill air. When he headed for the door, however, she bolted from the bed and blocked his path.
"Where are you going?" she demanded.
"Just out, Deirdre. I just have to go out." He refused to look at her nudity.
"If this is because of what happened last night..."
"Of course, it"s because of what happened last night!" he shouted. "It was wrong, Deirdre! I"m a married man. I love my wife. And now I"ve done the one thing that is sure to put an end to my marriage and my family. I am below contempt." He pushed past her.
"Baris! Please, don"t go."
He paused a moment with his hand on the latch then shook his head and left the room. His steps were fast and furious, taking him along the wide corridor, down the spiraling staircase and out the front door of the inn. Early morning sunshine hit him full in the face, nearly blinding him. Frowning, he slipped into the shadows created by the tall buildings.
He swung into an alley, barely conscious of the filth that lay on the ground. From alley to alley he went, heedless of his direction, uncertain of his goal. He just wanted to get away. Away! He stopped suddenly. Away from what? From Deirdre? From the inn? From the memory of what had taken place there?
By the Sovereign! Just walking away couldn"t erase the fact that he had made love with another woman. And that he had enjoyed it. By the G.o.ds, how he had enjoyed it! Even now, the memories were enough to tease his body, to taunt him. He roared out an epithet and once more began walking. Several times he saw men pa.s.sed out from drink, empty or half-empty bottles clutched in their cold hands. Baris plucked up one such bottle and took a long swallow of the bitter ale. It burned a path to his stomach and he took another, subconsciously realizing he was punishing himself. That only made his anger stronger and he drained the bottle of its contents. With a disgusted oath, he hurled it against a building, watching it shatter. The drunk grunted and shifted position.
Baris glared down at him, at his neck, now exposed. He started toward the man, then stopped. No, not a drunk. He wanted someone else, someone he could command and control, lure with his power. His anger driven to fury by the drink on an empty stomach, he strode onward. If he was destined to be a Lair Vector, living out his life in relative solitude, away from a one-on-one relationship then so be it. He needed to get used to using his power and accept that there would always be a s.e.xual component to it.
He rounded a corner, nearly colliding with a young man coming the other direction. The youth glared up at him, his eyes barely focused.
"Watch where you"re going!" he snarled and made as if to push Baris aside.
Baris stood his ground, his hands closing into fists at his side.
"Perhaps you should be the one watching," he said tightly.
The young man started to speak, then stopped as his gaze flicked over Baris and his expensive clothing.
"What are you doing here? You look like you should be over on High Street."
Baris had no idea what High Street was or what sort of clientele it catered to, but he didn"t like the surly tone in the man"s voice. The ale he had consumed had quickly gone to his head, making him dizzy. And the way the youth"s eyes were darting about, as if unable to train on any one object, was not helping. Baris drew a deep breath.
"I will be where I choose to be."
The young man shrugged, then reached into his vest pocket. He took out a leather pouch and shook it in Baris" face.
"You have money, I have hack."
"What is hack?"
"Just the best thing since s.e.x," the young man answered with a sly grin. "Just a pinch and you"ll see the world in a whole different way. And my stuff"s pure. It"s not softened with some useless herb. You"ll see the quality, taste the quality, feel the quality."
"A drug?" Baris shook his head. "I have no need for such."
"Suit yourself." The young man made to return the pouch to his vest but dropped it instead. With an oath he bent to retrieve it and stumbled, falling to his hands and knees. Broken gla.s.s sliced into his hand and he yelped, falling back to lean against the wall.
"d.a.m.n! Now look what you made me do."
Baris barely heard the words. His gaze was on the blood running freely down the man"s hand and dripping into the dirt. His body began to respond with alarming intensity. There was something different about the scent of this blood, something alluring and powerful. Almost without thinking, Baris hunkered down before the youth. Without a word, he reached out, caught a drop of blood and placed it on his tongue.
The young man looked at him, his face screwed up in disgust. "What the h.e.l.l are you doing?" he snarled.
Baris forced his gaze to the man"s face, still reeling from the taste of the blood. He had never experienced anything like it. It rushed through his body, set his nerves to tingling, brought a giddy sense of well-being. He had to have more. He straightened and reached for the young man, who shrank back, confused and suddenly very afraid.
Baris smiled and let his Illusion fade away. The youth gasped, cloudy eyes going wide. Even in his drugged state, he knew what he viewed. He pressed back against the wall.
"No," he whispered.
"Oh, yes," Baris whispered back and clamped one hand at the youth"s nape. His gaze locked on the man"s and slowly, tauntingly, he bared his incisors.
"Please," the youth begged, though his voice was barely audible.
"Yes, you will please me," Baris returned and sank his teeth into the man"s neck.
CHAPTER 13.
Baris looked up at the windows of the inn, then slowly climbed the steps. It was late afternoon, but what he had done with all of the time since leaving the inn that morning, he couldn"t say. He couldn"t remember. Now, his stomach rumbled with hunger and his muscles complained of fatigue. It was agony to drag his body up the long staircase to his room. He hesitated before rapping on the door. He had not thought to take his room key with him and wondered what he would do if Deirdre were out. Fortunately, she was there, dressed in her bedclothes, her hair rumpled, her eyes swollen and red.
Baris caught his breath. "What"s wrong?"
"I...I thought you might not return," she managed, before once again breaking into soft sobs. She turned away from him.
He caught her and pulled her into his arms. "I"m sorry, Deirdre. I"m so sorry. I didn"t mean to worry you. I didn"t mean to hurt you." He lay his chin atop her head. "I"m sorry."
She said nothing for a few moments, just held to on him as if rea.s.suring herself that he was indeed there. Finally, she spoke. "Where did you go? And why? Were you that angry with me?"
"Oh, Deirdre, I wasn"t angry with you at all. I was angry with myself. Angry and disappointed. Anika was right. I needed to leave. I am not fit to be called her husband." He released her and sank into a chair by the fire.
After a moment, she came toward him and held out her hand. "Let me take your cloak. You look exhausted. I can make you some tea if you"d like."
He looked up at her, then took off his cloak. "Tea," he murmured. He remembered Quentin"s words again. But it couldn"t be. He had taken none of her tea for the past day or so. Still, he had been drawn to her, made love with her. Quentin had been wrong. It wasn"t her magic that was controlling his actions. It was his l.u.s.t. He nodded.
"Tea would be wonderful. After I rest a bit, we can go out for dinner. You must be starved."
"We don"t have to go out, Baris. We can just eat here if you would rather."
"No, that"s all right. There"s a lot of city to explore out there." He drew a sudden, deep breath. Iron. "Have you been using magic?"
She flushed but nodded. "I was trying to find you. I was scared, Baris. I don"t want to lose you. I...I love you."
He was somehow not surprised by her words. They only seemed to add weight to his already-burdened conscience. "Why don"t you freshen up? I may not be good for much else but I can certainly heat water for tea."
Deirdre dropped down on the floor before him and caught his hands. "Baris, you are good for everything. You are kind, sensitive, sweet and so very much fun to be around. I couldn"t help falling in love with you. Any woman would."
He chuckled harshly. "You make me sound like quite a catch."
She smiled and leaned forward to kiss him lightly on the cheek. "You are."
He looked into the dark depths of her eyes then tenderly smoothed her hair. "Thank you, Deirdre. Your words mean more than you know. Now, go on, get ready for the evening. During my walks today, I saw that a play is being performed a few blocks from here. I"m going to take you."
She let out a soft gasp of delight, kissed him again and dashed toward the bathroom. "I"ll be ready whenever you wish. And I"ll make you proud, Baris. You"ll see." She smiled at him, slipped into the bathroom and closed the door.
He sat staring at the door for a long time before rising to heat the water. His thoughts returned to the youth in the alley. He had left the boy weak and trembling but with a command to meet him near the inn later that evening. Baris knew the boy would honor that command. He had no choice. And Baris would be there as well. He wanted more of what this young man had to offer.
He went to the washbasin and splashed his face with cold water, then dried it vigorously. Deirdre"s brush tamed his black locks. He wished he could see his own reflection, see what he looked like. All he had to go on was what other Vectors looked like. To him, they weren"t all that imposing. But he knew to mere mortals they were.
On sudden impulse, he stripped, tossing his soiled garments into a corner of the room. He moved toward the wardrobe, intent on taking advantage of the inn"s hospitality in providing new clothing. Deirdre"s quiet, happy singing stopped him. He turned toward the bathroom. For a moment, he stood outside listening to her then he turned the handle and stepped into the warm, scented room.
Deirdre looked up at him. "Baris?"
He approached the large tub, scooped up a handful of bubbles, then looked at her.
"Did you not invite me to join you the other night?"
She flushed and nodded. He blew the bubbles toward her gently. They floated through the air, landing on her head like a white, sparkly crown.
"Does that offer still stand?" he asked softly. Then, without waiting for an answer, he slid into the hot water behind her.
His hands found her b.r.e.a.s.t.s and he ran his fingers over their softness, even as she tilted her head back and his lips claimed hers. Gone was his indecision, his guilt, his conscience. He wanted her and he would have her. He nuzzled against her neck, his tongue drawing small circles in her warm flesh. He didn"t need to feed, not yet, but he knew that she had used her magic. Still, he timed his penetration of her neck to coincide with the moment she turned to face him and he penetrated her body. Her gasp was intense, shrill; and she grabbed at him in desperation. He felt elated, intoxicated. Never had he experienced such an o.r.g.a.s.mic rush. It claimed his entire body, left him gasping and dizzy. Finally, he lay, panting, his cheek resting on the edge of the cold metal tub. Deirdre"s soft breaths brushed against his ear, sending chills dancing over him. He seemed unable to move, as if his limbs were made of stone, instead of flesh and blood.
Slowly, she began to stroke his back, her fingernails barely touching his skin. It sent shivers of delight through him, brought him to arousal yet again. Still, he was too exhausted to act on it. Instead, he closed his eyes and let her gentle touch lull him into sleep.
His rest was brief, but packed with nightmares. Faces swirled around him, jeering and taunting. Anika, Deirdre, Darius, Vail, Quentin, the young man in the alley. They all seemed to be laughing at him, as if they knew something he did not. Each time he reached out for one of them to demand to know what it was, they disappeared, fading away into nothingness, leaving him alone and frightened. In desperation, he turned toward Jaeger, silently begging the Vector to help him. But Jaeger only shook his head and turned away. Baris dropped his gaze and saw Thale. The little boy"s eyes were full of tears, and anger reddened his small face. Baris held out his arms but Thale let out a wail and ran away from him. Baris tried to follow but could not. He could not move, rooted to the spot as if he were a tree standing alone in a meadow. And suddenly he became a tree, staring in despair at the forest beyond his reach, beyond his tearful pleas for acceptance. He was alone. He woke with a gasp and a cry.
Deirdre started, turning her head to look at him. "Are you all right?"
He nodded, though he was still shaken. "The water"s getting cold. And if we"re to get any dinner before the play, we need to get dressed." He climbed from the tub, picked up a towel and dried himself quickly.
Deirdre watched, her gaze sultry and provocative. "I like what I see," she murmured.
He glanced at her, some of his uneasiness fading. "Do you? Why don"t you get out so we can compare notes?"
She laughed and did so. Bubbles slid slowly down her nude body, following each sensuous curve. She made no move toward a towel but gave Baris a small smile. "Why don"t you dry me?" she purred.
Baris" body answered for him. He wrapped his towel around her and pulled her to him. Her skin was warm and moist, scented with the perfumed bubbles. It suddenly occurred to him that he smelled the same and he chuckled.
"What?"
"Nothing. It"s just that people are going to be hard-pressed to tell which of us smells better tonight." He shook himself and backed away from her. "We"d better get dressed or we may never leave the inn at all."
"And there"s something wrong with that?" she called, as he left the bathroom.
Baris made no response but quickly dressed. He checked the water over the fire, then grimaced. It had almost completely boiled out. Carefully, he swung the hot pot away from the flames, then sighed. No tea. No magic. Just him and his amoral actions. He couldn"t blame this on anyone, certainly not Deirdre.
"Deirdre," he called. "I"m going out for a moment. Just for some air. Be ready when I get back."
She appeared at the bathroom door, toweling her hair. She gave him a quizzical look but didn"t protest. "I"ll be waiting."
He smiled, his gaze once again absorbing her nude form, then he s.n.a.t.c.hed up his cloak and left the room. He found the youth at the precise location he had ordered. The young man rose from where he had been sitting in the dark alley. Even in the absence of light Baris could see him quite clearly. He was still pale, still trembling, but he remained quiet as Baris approached.
A small voice screamed inside his head that it was too soon, that the youth needed time to recover that blood which he had already lost. But the voice was drowned out by this new need that surged through Baris" body. He wanted this youth, wanted his blood. But he didn"t want to risk killing him.
"I never asked you your name," he said softly.
"Antyn," the young man answered obediently.
"Well, Antyn, I must repay you for your--gift. Please, follow me." He turned, knowing the youth would do as ordered.
They returned to the inn, where Baris purchased another room under his name, again using his Vector magic to preclude the need to dip into his nearly-vanished purse. He escorted the young man up the stairs and showed him inside the large, well-furnished room. Antyn took in the surroundings with one glance then turned back to Baris.
"You will rest here," Baris said. "I will have dinner sent up for you. You will not leave this room unless I say you will. Is that clear?"
Antyn nodded. Baris licked his lips and approached the youth. His mouth watered at the thought of the man"s blood and without further hesitation, he took what he wanted.
CHAPTER 14.
The next few days swept past in a blur. Baris was exquisitely happy but also agitated. He found it almost impossible to relax enough to sleep and spent a good portion of the nights either walking the city or taking blood from Antyn. He made love to Deirdre whenever he desired, no longer feeling any guilt for his actions. Thoughts of Anika were few and far between, thoughts of Thale even less. There were times when he wondered if they truly existed or if they had been merely part of his imagination.
He kept Antyn well-fed and well-rested, allowing him to go into the city during the day. What the youth did, Baris didn"t care, as long as he was there at night so Baris could feed. As for Antyn, he seemed to be enjoying his newfound status. Baris doubted that he had ever lived in such splendor or eaten such exquisite foods. Baris even kept him well-supplied with hack, using his Vector magic to "buy" it from dealers. Antyn"s addiction was pathetic to Baris" way of thinking, yet it was just one more hold that Baris had over the youth.