Right now, he was beginning to think it"d been a blessing. Over the years, he"d been focused on surviving. Finding food, and shelter. Making sure the perimeter was secured. He hadn"t thought much about anything else. Even the times when he allowed himself to wallow had been few and far between. Some new threat or necessity had always cropped up to pull his thoughts to immediate survival.
It was so much easier to live that way than face the extreme loneliness he felt when he was around others.
A part of him was tempted to stay behind and rot here, but he couldn"t do that. Not until he fulfilled the promise he"d made to his parents and siblings.
He wouldn"t die or rest until he"d paid Barnabas back everything that was owed to him.
Everything.
And in spite of his trying to feign sleep, Sumi, Thia, and Darice pulled him into their circle. Before he knew it, they were trading old stories like long-lost friends.
In fact, Bastien was in the middle of one about Fain when Dancer finally woke up.
The laughter died on Sumi"s face as her gaze met Hauk"s. She got up immediately and rushed to his side. "How do you feel?"
"Like a guy who made a pa.s.s at Thia and Nyk saw it."
Laughing, Bastien grinned at Thia, who appeared less than pleased by his description. Obviously her father"s overprotectiveness was a source of great irritation.
Sumi rolled her eyes. "You have one heck of a shiner. Who was tall enough in that fight to hit your face?"
"He wasn"t. But the board in the b.a.s.t.a.r.d"s hands gave him reach."
Bastien laughed again. He"d been in that fight a few times himself. A few of those times, against Fain.
Snorting at his humor, Sumi pulled out a bottle of water and then helped him to sip it.
"How long have I been out?" Dancer asked.
"A few hours."
He cursed. "I need to get going."
"No, you don"t."
"Sumi..."
"Don"t argue with me. I"m putting my foot down, Dancer. But if you attempt to leave, I"ll be putting it up your a.s.s."
He laughed then groaned.
Thia and Darice moved to stand behind her. She shoved at Darice. "Told you he wasn"t dead."
"I knew from the snore he wasn"t dead. I said he was dying."
Bastien brought over a small plate of food and one of the roots he"d managed to dig up that could take the edge off the pain. "If you took the punches I did, I know it"ll be hard to chew, but ... that root will minimize the pain."
"Thanks." Dancer set the plate down beside Sumi.
"C"mon, guys," Bastien said as he caught the gleam in Dancer"s eyes and knew exactly where his thoughts were going and what the two of them would soon be doing. "Let"s give them some quiet time."
Darice hesitated before he followed Bastien and Thia back to the small fire.
Hauk winced as he tried to chew the meat. Bastien was right. Eating was rough. "I need to go back for Illyse."
"We already took care of it." She gestured to the fire where the lorina was curled up and sleeping. "Bastien said you owe him a good night of drinking for the scratches she gave him."
Bastien ignored them as best he could while he entertained the kids and did his d.a.m.nedest not to think about how incredibly long it"d been since the last time he had s.e.x with someone else.
Thrix was wrong.
The p.o.r.n and sports networks did not alleviate that ache in the least little bit. Only a woman could ease this pain.
After a few minutes, Darice excused himself to take a bush break.
Thia slid closer to Bastien. "You"re royal blooded, aren"t you?"
Her question caught him off guard. "Pardon?"
"I can tell. Even though you"re ... a bit rough at the moment, you move like someone who"s had royal manners and decorum beat into him from the cradle."
She was terribly astute. "Yeah, I was."
"What happened?"
"What always happens. Somebody gets greedy. Someone else gets stupid. Next thing you know, you put the wrong person at your back and you"ve got a knife sliding through your ribs."
"You sound like my father."
Given that they shared family, it made sense. The Triosans were famous for offing each other. Jullien had been right all those years ago with his warning. d.a.m.n shame he hadn"t listened. Or thought to apply it to the Cabarro side.
As Thia excused herself, Bastien pulled his link out and turned it on. Dancer had called for a Sentella evacuation, and promised him that they could get The League tracing chip out of him.
If they could ...
He glanced down at Ember"s gorgeous face where she was staring up at him with the brightest laugh. Her green eyes twinkled. If he closed his eyes, he could still feel her hand on his face. Smell the faint trace of her perfume whenever he buried his lips in the valley between her b.r.e.a.s.t.s. Feel her hands tugging at his hair while he made love to her until they were both sweaty and spent.
d.a.m.n, how he missed her. His body hardened even more as his memories of her surged with vicious biting images that drove him to the brink of insanity until he feared he"d go crazy from testosterone poisoning. He wanted her back so badly he could taste her already.
Don"t even think about contacting her.
She was most likely married with a couple of kids by now. Worse? She"d tell Alura he was alive-bypa.s.sing the records Jullien had forged that said he was dead so that Barnabas and the others would lax their guard and give him an advantage for taking them down. If Alura ever learned Jullien"s report was false, she would run to his enemies with the news.
And yet a part of him was willing to risk it. That was the part of him that had always gotten him into trouble.
That part of him that loved Ember without reservation.
I"m not going to be stupid this time.
He"d get off this rock and get on with what needed to be done. His father had been right. It was time to start thinking with the head on his shoulders.
By the next morning, Bastien was only moving because of the roots he"d found. As soon as he heard Dancer stirring, he knew the Andarion would be in every bit as much pain as he was. So to be neighborly, he carried a root over to him.
Dancer glared at his approach.
Bastien grinned at the death he saw in Dancer"s eyes. "Not enough root in the universe, eh?"
"Be glad my weapons are too far to reach or I"d shoot you."
With a groan of his own, Bastien sat down beside him. "Not a morning person, are you?"
"f.u.c.k you."
Bastien laughed. "You"re not my type and I"m not quite that desperate." He flicked playfully at Dancer"s ear. "Though I have to say that you are awfully pretty for a male. If I were ever tempted, it"d probably be by someone as cute as you."
Dancer bared his fangs to him at the same time Sumi came over with a plate for each of them.
"Our fierce protectors." Her eyes danced with mirth. "You two don"t look like you could take on a sleeping lizard this morning."
Dancer mustered a lopsided grin. "I have to say that I definitely felt better last night."
She blushed profusely.
Which made Dancer blush, too, as they all felt awkward over what the two of them had done last night.
Darice came running up to break the tension. "I saw a sparn this morning. Isn"t this where they nest?"
Dancer hesitated. "Dari-"
"Can"t I go with Thia while we wait?"
He shook his head. "That"s a bad idea. Thia"s no better at climbing than you are. I wouldn"t trust the two of you at an indoor gym alone."
Darice"s face swelled up immediately. "We"re so close! It"s not fair that I can"t get my Endurance feather!"
Dancer"s expression was every bit as despondent that he was having to say no. With his brow furrowed, he rubbed at his ribs as if he was actually considering taking the climb with his nephew.
Bastien was aghast. While Andarions were tough, that went straight into the realm of stupendously stupid.
Sumi looked up at the cliff in front of them. "What kind of climb are we talking about? Can it be done in one day?"
Dancer hesitated before he answered. "The main approach is just over there." He pointed to her left. "It"s twelve pitches to the summit. Mostly face climbing with some corners and headwalls. There"s a couple of gendarmes where sparns nest, so you shouldn"t have to go all the way to the summit to get the feathers. The only hazard really is loose rock, and I wouldn"t trust any existing anchors that you might find along the way." He locked gazes with her. "It"s easily done in a day, barring an accident.... What are you thinking?"
"That I take him."
They all stared at her.
"What?" she asked in an offended tone. "League trained, folks. Head of my cla.s.s. Before that, I was a xen.o.botanist. Been on many vertical expeditions in some frightening places. I can climb a mountain ... building ... dead body..." She cast a playful grin to Dancer. "Surly Andarions ... no problem."
Dancer turned green and for a minute, Bastien thought he might hurl.
"Please, Dancer?" Darice begged. "Please! Please! Please! I"ll do anything if you say yes! I"ll even wash your boots. Sharpen your sword. Be your personal slave."
Dancer glanced to Sumi.
"You know I won"t let anything happen to him."
Darice went down on his knees, crawling toward Dancer and begging as if he were in absolute agony. "Please, Uncle Dancer, please!"
With an irritated sigh, he nodded. "But!" He held his hand up to his overly excited nephew. "You lip off to her and she"s to bring you right back down here. You understand me, Darice?"
"I"ll be good. I promise! I love you, Dancer!" Whooping in delight, he shot to his feet and ran off to get ready.
Hauk pushed himself up with an even louder groan.
"You okay?"
He nodded at Sumi"s concerned question. "I want to double-check the climbing gear."
"All right, Grandma."
"I also have the pitches diagrammed."
"That"ll be helpful. Anything else?"
He pulled her against him and pressed his cheek to hers. "Don"t get hurt."
Sumi smiled. "I won"t let anything happen to Darice."
"Not just him."
"I know." She kissed his cheek before she pulled back. "Thia? You going with us?"
The look of horror on her face was priceless and comical. "Oh h.e.l.l no. Peeing off the side of a mountain, listening to Darice moan and complain ... I"d rather bring a date home to meet my dad-that would at least be entertaining until I had to scrub the blood out of my clothes." She gestured toward Bastien. "Think I"ll hang at base camp and watch over the two males who don"t whine like babies."
Sumi laughed. "All right."
While Sumi and Darice changed, Hauk checked the ropes, anchors, biners, harnesses, cams, hexes, nuts, slings, and belay devices, and packed them each a day sack.
When they returned, he and Bastien took a moment to help them gear up and double-check everything again.
Darice curled his lip. "Do I have to wear a full-body harness? Really? Dancer, I"m not a baby."
"If you invert on the climb, you"ll thank me."
He made a sound of utter disgust in the back of his throat. And again when Dancer made sure everything was fastened properly to his sling. "Gah, Dancer. Really? I"ve been climbing since I was three. Stop, already!"