"Caring?"
"It is a word of Timer Andrew. You have done your work with energy that comes from your feeling. You smile when the work is going well. I know you can feel your actions. You feel them as I. "
"Yes, I do feel my work," said Waterhammer.
"Each of us learns the word of Timer Andrew and does his best to understand it. Before you are terminated you will choose another man and give him the word. I will teach you how to find someone. In the mean time, you must know that it is not for you to understand Andrew. You need only pa.s.s the words to another. Timer Andrew said it was important that the word remains alive in men. The salvation of the men depends on the word. When all men know the word, men will be saved. "
"Saved? Why do we need to be saved?" Waterhammer asked.
"I don"t know" said Jordan. "Perhaps, in time, one of us will know. For now, you must keep the word to yourself. Control will terminate you for having heard it. They will terminate you for simply mentioning the name "Andrew. " Loaders are no longer given that name so you may never mention it. If they find you, they will terminate all of us. "
"I will keep the word," said Waterhammer.
"And when you are promoted to loader and are given your name, you will be given the power to terminate men. And then you will pa.s.s the word to another whom you can watch. And if you feel he will slip, if you feel he will make a mistake and utter the word of Andrew to any other you will terminate him before he takes a step forward. these instructions will not be repeated. "
"I understand, Loader Jordan. "
"Very good. Now, let"s begin. . . "
Jordan removed his clothing and stood before the ma.s.sive doors. The bolts on the doors slid open. Jordan could feel the vibration in his feet as the giant door swung wide. there was a vibration in his neck as the controller spoke.
"Loader A, twenty-percent reward period beginning immediately. "
Had he retrieved the entire load drilled by Waterhammer he could have expected a ten-fold period for exceeding his quota by a wide margin. He had simply let the loader idle while the maintenance crew collected Waterhammer and took him for repair. When the work period had ended he found himself only slightly over his quota. Performance worthy of only the smallest period allotted. He would spend the first fifth of the work day in the sunroom. The remainder of the day he would spend at his station remembering the bright warmth.
He remembered pieces of an instruction the book Thomas had given him,". . . Tiger burning bright. . . what immortal hand or eye could frame thy fearful symmetry. . . " But he had only been taught enough to read the machine manuals. What was a tiger? What symmetry should he fear?
As the door opened the light from inside escaped into the hallway. Where it touched him there was warmth and white. He never knew his skin could be so white. As he stepped into the room and felt the light engulf him as if he had fallen into liquid. It was a feeling he remembered from somewhere long before.
He hardly noticed the ma.s.sive door swing shut behind him.
There was a man lying naked on a flat tables arranged along the walls of the square white room. On the ceiling was a round white light source.
The man sensed the vibration of the door closing. He slowly lifted his head and looked at Jordan. His eyes were openings onto a cold emptiness. Jordan hardly recognized him, his skin so white, eyes so black and deep. He raised a fist and signed the men"s greeting to his mentor, Driver Thomas.
Thomas sat up on the table and motioned for Jordan to sit beside him. As Jordan sat Thomas reached over and put his hand around the back of Jordan"s neck. He jumped off the table, stood in front of him, and pulled Jordan"s head toward him. He leaned forward until Jordan"s chin was over his shoulder. Then he pressed Jordan"s neck against his, touching his control connector against Jordan"s. Instinctively, Jordan pulled away.
"Don"t be afraid," Driver Thomas said, a voice coming from the center of Jordan"s head. "Control doesn"t monitor here. "
Jordan relaxed and leaned into Driver Thomas.
Driver Thomas said, "But we won"t have much time. If the door opens we"ll be on monitor. they"ll sixty-two us. "
Jordan tried to pull away to look into Driver Thomas"s face, but Thomas kept Jordan"s neck pinned in an iron grip.
"Why are you doing this?" said Jordan.
"Last lesson, Jordan," said Thomas. "Control knows about the book. Even now maintenance is searching for it. They searched the K group and suspected Loader Solomon. That"s why he was terminated. When they couldn"t find the book they terminated everyone. I saw the order pa.s.s for three hundred replacements. An entire group, Jordan. three hundred men. three hundred lives. "
"Waterhammer didn"t show the book to anyone," Jordan said. He felt a tightness grow in his chest. It was a pain like the one he had felt the day before when stared down the shovel of the loader at Gaffer and Waterhammer on the mine floor.
"I have to give you all lessons at once now," Thomas said. "there are many books. Many carry the word. "
"My waterhammer said he understands," said Jordan.
"Love is the lives of the men," said Thomas. "Does he understand that?"
Jordan looked down at the muscles in Thomas"s back. Then he stared out at the blank wall and the empty tables in the sunroom. The warm white light loosened the muscles in his back and arms.
"The lives of the men," said Jordan. "My life?"
"All life. The decision to repair rather than to replace. The worth of a man to himself. Worth of life as that of the ore. "
"Men worth as ore?"
"On the surface, Timer Andrew learned that men are bred from other men. They value their own lives as reward. Love is the value of men"s lives. It is somehow like time in the sunroom. Like promotion. It is the value of men for other men. "
In his mind Jordan saw the gaffer kneeling beside the wounded waterhammer. He remembered the boy"s eyes as he threatened with the shovel of his machine. Why hadn"t the boy moved?
"My gaffer," said Jordan. "Last work period he prevented me from taking a dirty load. Waterhammer was injured. I should have taken him with the ore. "
"How did gaffer stop you?" asked Thomas.
"He stood in front of my machine. "
"Why didn"t you simply take the ore with them both?"
"I don"t know," said Jordan. "He looked at me as if. . . as if he could damage my machine with his eyes. "
"Now you are seeing what I see," said Thomas. "there are instructions not learned but known. The gaffer knows without teaching. I had hoped you could come to this conclusion as well but time is short. "
Thomas pulled back from Jordan and took the man"s head in his hands. He pulled Jordan"s face toward his and pressed his lips against Jordan"s. Then he leaned aside and made connection with his neck again.
"That is the sign for Love. that is the symbol of the value of man"s life. "
They felt a vibration that could only mean the door was opening.
"The period is not over," said Jordan.
"Control must monitor this room after all," said Thomas, scanning the blank walls. Thomas pointed and Jordan spotted an imperfection in the seamless walls, a spot slightly darker than the brilliant white all around.
Jordan felt his heart race. His breathing deepened and he felt the white of the room intensify. He felt he could hear with his ears again.
"It"s as if the word itself is more powerful then the men," said Thomas. They saw the dark crack between the wall and the door as the ma.s.sive hinge swung open.
What do we do?" Jordan said. He looked back at the door, then quickly touched his neck connector to Thomas"s.
"These are the final words of Timer Andrew," said Thomas. "the last lesson. Remember this and run. Control is on the surface. They cannot terminate all of us. "
Jordan felt Thomas press his hands into his back. He could feel the warmth from Thomas"s body, the vibration of Thomas"s heart, the rhythm of Thomas"s breathing.
Thomas continued, "Have the men switch their control connections from radio to cable. Go to your machine and destroy the yellow control box. Then, it too will ignore signals from control. "
Thomas grabbed Jordan"s arm and pulled him to the center of the room as the door stopped in its travel and the mobile particle weapon appeared in the doorway.
Jordan felt a tingling in his neck as Thomas pulled him close for the last time. Thomas embraced Jordan and made connection. He said, "Timer Andrew walked out. He walked out of the mine and they didn"t stop him. He worked for them on the surface and they gave him time. He worked for them in the mine and they gave him more time. Now, I will give you time. "
Then Thomas put both his hands on Jordan"s chest and pushed him away. Surprised, Jordan fell to the floor. He heard the control voice. "Driver T-for-Thomas group M and Loader J-For-Jordan group in violation of quota as required by ordinance 62. 1. 3. . . "
Thomas quickly he raised his fist and thrust one finger into the air as Jordan looked up from the floor.
Jordan remembered the sign instinctively. He had seen it as a boy at the breeding farm. His muscles tensed as if he had been programmed. As the particle weapon charged he propelled himself through the narrow darkness between the machine and the door, from the white sunroom to the dark of the mine. He could feel the burning backscatter on his legs as he pulled himself through the gap. The beam blast ricocheted off the rear wall of the room and tore through the same s.p.a.ce he claimed for himself.
He didn"t turn back. Outside he grabbed his work suit and put it on with his helmet. He stepped into his boots and ran down the catwalk to the elevators. He reached the cars leading to the mine entrance and watched the lights flash as the elevator rose to meet him. He felt tired and he didn"t know why. The air had grown thick. It was hard to breathe.
The elevator arrived and he entered the car with another shift. The weight in the car was off-balance and the doors would not close. Slowly, he edged his way past the thirty-one men in the car. When he neared the front he placed his hands on the back of the man in front of him. With a spark of thought, he pushed the startled man clear of the car and out into the empty gallery.
The elevator sensed the change in weight. The doors closed and they began to descend. Jordan felt a tingling in his neck. then he heard the control voice.
"Stand clear of Loader J-for-Jordan group A. " the men in the car pressed themselves into the walls of the car clearing a s.p.a.ce around him as the elevator came to a halt. As the door opened, Jordan could see the metallic gleam of the particle weapon stationed at the elevator door. He thought of the hot beam. He could see the warning lights on the unit make the spectral shift from green to red as it charged. He remembered the ricochet from the strike that had killed Driver Thomas only moments before.
The doors opened completely and the machine inched forward to fill the chamber with its deadly radiation. Jordan dove toward the machine. He clawed at the cables on its exposed surface and pulled himself past it and out of the elevator. He stood behind the machine and turned briefly to see the thirty men in blue overalls and white hardhats fall limp in the elevator car.
Jordan ran to his machine. He followed the empty mine corridors until he felt vibration in the air. He could feel the rumbling in his feet, the pressure waves in the air pounded against his chest as he neared the mine activity.
He could feel the steam and dust in his face. He saw the clouds of yellow-gray rock and black ore blasted to dust under the pressure of the waterhammer and the loader. Suddenly, the vibration stopped.
The men turned as he arrived. Waterhammer and Gaffer stood looking at him as he approached his silent machine. He found the heavy gaffer"s crowbar lying on the ground next to the loader. He lifted it as the lights began to flicker.
Jordan leveled the rod at the yellow box mounted on the side of his machine and swung. He propelled the heavy iron rod against the yellow box. With the vibration of each impact the muscles in his arms tightened, bulged, and burned like a beam flash. He could feel the memory of Driver Thomas grow like an animal in him. Its arms and legs pressed outward from his chest. It was a cold uncomfortable feeling. He imagined the maintenance men lifting Thomas"s limp body and putting it in the disposal chute. He could see Thomas"s face, limp and expressionless-a face that had only moments before told him he was as valuable as the ore he drilled.
Men valued as ore. Men valued as men.
The men in the mine watched him then looked upward toward the portable lighting that began to go dark under command from control.
Jordan pulled his body into each crowbar swing. He could feel the metal box yield slightly under each blow. Darkness enveloped them like termination. He swung in the blackness, remembering where the box had been. He could feel it crumpling under the blows of the heavy iron bar. Suddenly, he took a swing and the rod continued farther than it had gone before. He dropped the rod and felt the machine. He could feel the box dangling from cables connecting it to the loader. He grabbed the box and pulled. the cables hung firm.
Then he felt arms around his waist. He stopped for a moment. The arms released him and he felt hands travelling along body, up to his shoulders, over the ripples in his arms. Then the hands were on his hands. And then they were gone. He felt the box move in his hands. Someone was pulling on it. Jordan leaned backward and pulled in time with the second pair of hands. Time after time he pulled until the box came free and he stumbled backward.
Jordan dropped the box and mounted the machine. Once inside felt along the control console and flipped the switch. He felt the vibration in his seat as the loader sprang to life. He turned on the head lights and illuminated the mine shaft. Instinctively, he reached for the control socket and slapped it to his neck. Instead of hearing a hiss of static and the voice from within his head there was silence. the gauge and display panels were dark.
He sat and stared at the men standing in the mine. They looked back at him motionless. They waited for an action. Jordan left the cab. He went to each man on the floor and pushed the switches on the control connections on their necks to "cable. " Without a cable connected they would not hear commands-an offense for which they could all be killed.
Waterhammer stood along side the loader looking in. His waterknife hung limp around his chest from its straps. The gaffer stood holding the crowbar. Jordan got back into the cab. He remembered the tightness he felt in his legs when he stopped the loader in front of the wounded men. The feeling returned. He thought of Thomas. He smashed his foot onto the accelerator and turned the machine around. He grit his jaws tight. He gripped the controls as his palms grew wet and his knuckles faded white and bloodless. He felt he was watching someone else.
Jordan aimed the machine"s shovel at a yellow control box on the wall and drove into it with such force that the metal shovel blade slashed through it and into the soft rock in the wall. the gaffers and waterhammers were free.
There was a burst of white steam from beside the vehicle as Waterhammer regained control of his tool. Gaffer freed the hoses and followed behind as Waterhammer aimed his tool forward and leapt onto the tracks for the ore train. He stopped, turned toward Jordan, and held his hand up in a fist.
Jordan felt the adrenaline jolt as it hit his bloodstream and scratched energy against his muscles. He turned the loader and drove onto the tracks. Water-hammer nodded, and Jordan hit the accelerator. The loader lurched forward, up the tracks, toward salvation and the word.
Jordan could see the track appearing from the blackness of the mine shaft as his loader rolled forward. He could feel unfamiliar vibrations in his seat. He knew a train was coming, but he knew there was a vibration within himself as well. He imagined the vibration was burning, an intensity he had never known.
In an eye blink an ore train was upon him. It plowed at full speed into his shovel and drove the loader backward. Jordan was thrown out of his seat. His body crashed into the gauge-panel and windshield of his cab. The loader door flapped open against its hinges. He shook his head. The pain started as an annoying itch, then crescendoed to an intolerable explosion.
His vision blurred. He tried to see out of the front window of the loader. Wetness dripped from his forehead and stung his eyes. Through the fog of pain and blood, he could see men leaving the train. Maintenance men. Surface men. Men with weapons.
He heard Thomas"s words, "They can"t terminate us all. "
Jordan pushed himself backward onto the seat and smashed his foot down onto the accelerator. The loader lurched forward. Its shovel cut into the small train. The train yielded, twisting and rolling off the tracks as the shovel mangled the metal in front of it.
A maintenance man in white overalls and a blue helmet appeared in the loader doorway. Jordan saw the man level a particle gun toward him. There was a blast of white from behind that turned into a dark mist. The maintenance man fell from the loader in two pieces as the white blade of water slashed again. Jordan leaned over and looked out of the loader door. The uniformed man had been cut in half. His feet and arms twitched as a blotch of dark liquid widened around him. Jordan had seen so many gaffers and waterhammers in the same condition. The sight held no significance to him.
Unconsciously, he tapped the command to signify a dirty load.
There was another burst of white. With a single twist of his waist Waterhammer had cut across the ranks of men escaping the train. Then he trained his water blade on the train and sliced across it. Jordan took a breath, and manipulated the loader"s controls. His mind filled with Thomas"s words as he worked the machine unconsciously. He pushed the train pieces aside with his mechanical arms and legs. Man and machine.
"Tiger," he thought. "I am the tiger burning bright. " His arms and legs shook.
Waterhammer trotted up the tunnel firing his tool as a weapon. Jordan watched him disappear into the darkness. He took a breath, and felt the pain in his head sink to his chest and open a void. An emptiness opened in him again as he watched the gaffer follow Waterhammer up the tunnel freeing the hoses, disconnecting and reconnecting them to new water sources as they moved.
Fearful symmetry.
Jordan followed them and kept them in the flaming life of the vehicle headlights. Waterhammer destroyed the yellow control boxes that he found mounted on the tunnel walls. They came to a junction of tunnels where a group of men were returning from a shift at the mine face.
The men stopped and watched as Jordan rolled past. He held his fist up with one finger extended.
"Run. "
Then they were past the junction and back into the shaft.
Jordan rolled forward and upward. And suddenly there were men all around. Waterhammers and gaffers. They marched along side Jordan"s loader. Some were curious and threw question signs in the men"s sign language. Most just followed. At each junction in the tunnel they met more men who joined them.
Jordan forgot the pain in his head. He wiped the blood from his eyes and kept the headlights from his machine trained forward. Waterhammer cut into a yellow control box and a connector fell out.
Jordan heard words. The voice was the control voice but the words were those of Andrew. The words of change. "Love will save the men. They can"t terminate us all. " He could see the men touch their necks. They looked at each other wondering what had happened. And he saw the strange connector from the broken box attached to Waterhammer"s neck.
Waterhammer"s face split wide in a smile. Jordan saw Andrew and Thomas in his mind. From the pain and the emptiness, from the void within him came a spark as warm as the sunroom. A spark as warm as life.
Waterhammer quoted Andrew"s book for them to hear: "I will not cease from mental fight, nor shall my sword sleep in my hand, till we have built Jerusalem, in England"s green and pleasant land. "
Jordan wiped the blood from his eyes and willed his machine forward as the men followed. He could feel the vibration of their footsteps as the crowd multiplied. And then there was light in the distance. It was a light he had never seen before-bright and blue white. It didn"t flicker or strobe against his blinking eyes. He pressed down on the accelerator as the train track slid beneath his wheels and reflected the white light. The light grew. He could see shapes inside it. Colors. Colors he had never seen.
It grew until it was as large as the loader. Then it was along side him. It was above him. It was all around. His head swiveled under command from his eyes to absorb, to know. His dark world faded behind him as a new bright world opened ahead.
He secured the vehicle and jumped to the ground. A strange soft ground. The light engulfed him. It warmed him, caressing his body from all sides as if he were immersed in a warm ocean. His head, his body, his legs, all warmed to life and refueled by the glory of the brightness. He looked up and saw the lamp. He felt light and full of power.
Men rushed around him. They waved their arms and ran. Some fell on the ground and stared upward. Jordan saw machines and shapes he had never seen before. He looked from side to side but couldn"t find the walls. The ceiling was invisible. The power inside him burst and he felt his face tighten. His mouth opened. He bared his teeth as he felt himself press the air from his lungs. He saw other men doing the same. Teeth bared, they ran with the edges of their mouths pulled up toward their eyes.