Lochlan indicated her with a jerk of his chin. "Catarina met her cousin here a few moments ago."
His eyes widened in surprise. "Which one?"
Cat couldn"t wait to see what his next expression would be since he thought even less of the man than she did. "Damien St. Cyr."
Bracken reached for his hilt as he scanned the crowd with a feral grimace. "Is the b.a.s.t.a.r.d calling out guards?"
"Nay," she said breathlessly. "He gave me this cloak to hide with and told me to be careful lest they find me."
This time, Bracken"s jaw dropped. "Damien...St. Cyr told you that? Damien-I-have-no-soul-St.
Cyr? Satan"s misbegotten demonsp.a.w.n? The same demented boy who cut the strap on my saddle the first time I jousted and laughed when I broke my leg and collarbone?"
Actually, she"d forgotten about that one misdeed--there had been so many such events in their childhoods. "Aye. The same."
Bracken snorted. "What the h.e.l.l happened to him that he"d find decency now?"
She shrugged, every bit as baffled by it as he was. "Maybe he just grew up?"
Still, there was doubt in Bracken"s eyes. "More like he took a stiff blow to his head. Trust me, "twould take much more than that for the devil to change his ways. He used to live to hurt others."
Now Lochlan was looking sheepish.
Cat patted Bracken"s arm. "You"re right, but I think he"s different now."
"Then get the name of whatever priest exorcised him. We need to send the man a gift of appreciation."
"Bracken," she chided. "Have more charity. And let us be glad that he"s on our side in this." The one thing no one ever wanted was to have Damien against them. As Bracken had said, the man could be pure evil.
Bracken scoffed as he renewed his quest through the crowd. "I"m still not sure he"s not off to tell others where you are. They could be planning to take you even as we speak. Most likely at a time when you least expect it."
She shook her head. "Well that"s something I don"t wish to think of."
While they argued, Lochlan paused as they reached an armorer"s stand. He held up a long sword to test it.
Looking pleased with the weapon, he pa.s.sed it over to Bracken. "What say you to this?"
Bracken placed his forefinger below the cross hilt to check the balance. "Good proportions and balance. Fine lines."
"You"ll not find a better swordmaker in all of Christendom," a youth said as he came out of the tent that was set off to the side of the table. "My father takes great pride in his work."
"And it shows," Cat said, while Bracken swung the sword around his body. ""Tis a most beautiful weapon."
The boy beamed.
Cat stood back while Lochlan outfitted Bracken with everything he would need to fight. She"d never seen Bracken so pleased. There was a light in his eyes now that had been missing before and he stood taller. It was his dignity she realized. With the loss of his father and lands, the man had suffered a harsh blow to his ego. But now he appeared the same n.o.bleman she"d grown to know all those years ago.
It made her happy to see the return of her old friend and she was grateful to Lochlan for giving this to him. It was truly a good deed.
As soon as he was outfitted, Bracken excused himself to go partake of the armed games. But knowing him, she was sure he was off to take revenge on a few n.o.bles and "conquer" them. Cat bit back her smile as he literally ran like a child to join the other men in the list.
She walked up to Lochlan, who was paying the armorer. "That was a n.o.ble thing you did just now."
He shrugged his charitable deed aside. "I like to help people, especially those who"ve had a hard time of it."
Her heart softened. "My mother was like you. I once saw her pull the cloak off her own shoulders to wrap it around an old woman in one of the towns we were pa.s.sing through. It was freezing cold, but my mother said better it go to the one who needs it most. She was a kind lady."
"And you, la.s.s?"
"I, too. It"s how Lysander and Pagan ended up traveling with us. We found them on the road, starving. I invited them to dinner and the next thing my uncle knew, they were permanent fixtures. I would have had it no other way. Bavel used to chide me constantly about picking up strays. He said that one day they would turn on me."
"And did they?"
"Aye. A few. And it was one such stray who kidnapped me from my uncle and tried to deliver me to my father. I still can"t believe he betrayed me after all we did for him."
Lochlan turned toward her as the armorer left them to wait on another customer. "I"m sorry, Catarina."
She sighed before she stepped away. "Don"t be. I"m the one who has to deal with my father at some point. It merely irks me that he must move through others rather than dealing with me forthright. I am his daughter, yet we are awkward with one another. No child should feel that way around its parent."
She glanced at him as they walked back toward the trail that ran between the tents. His hair was tousled from the wind and his eyes vibrant. "You"ve no idea how much I hate being my father"s bargaining tool."
"I think I have a good idea on that, la.s.s."
Perhaps he did. There was something in his tone that spoke to the pain inside her. "Tell me something, Lochlan? Have you ever used someone this way?"
"Nay. I have not."
"And if you had a daughter--"
"I would treasure her with every part of me."
How she wanted to believe that. "Would you make her marry for the sake of your clan?"
Lochlan paused as he considered it. She gave him credit for the thought and she wondered what he"d say.
"Nay," he spoke at last. "I would never intentionally hurt my child. I"d find another way for peace.
One that could make both of us happy."
Cat took his strong hand into hers as those words made her ache. If only her father felt that way.
But it also made her think of Lochlan"s betrothed, who waited for him in Scotland. "And how does your future bride feel about marrying you?"
He shrugged. "I know not. However, there is nothing settled between us yet, so she is not truly my betrothed. I have yet to answer her father"s offer."
She c.o.c.ked her head. Given what he"d said earlier, she couldn"t imagine why he would wait.
"Why not?"
"Because I don"t want a wife who isn"t suited to me."
She frowned. "What does that mean?"
He let go of her hand before he started forward. "I need a wife at my side who will be steadfast and clearheaded. One who is intelligent and calm-spirited. I don"t want someone who will cause conflict in my home or with my clan, but rather a wife who can shoulder her burdens without complaint."
Cat cringed at what he described. "You speak of her as if she"s a horse. You seek a broodmare perhaps?"
He gave her a hostile glare. "Nay. While I hope the Lord sees fit to give me children, there is never any guarantee of that. In the event we are childless, I need a wife who is an a.s.set to my clan, not a hindrance."
While that made sense, it didn"t answer her original question. "But what of you the man, Lochlan? What do you seek in a woman?"
Lochlan glanced away from her probing stare as unnamed emotions choked him. He wanted what his brothers had. He wanted a woman who could hold him at night and stand by his side during the day. A woman who would love him and cherish him. One whose very presence made his day brighter.
But he would never find that and he knew it, so there was no need even to think about such things. His place was to care for others, not have them care for him. His needs weren"t important. Only those of his family and people.
However, she didn"t want to hear that. So he posed the same question to her. "Tell me what you want, Catarina? What kind of man would make your heart fly?"
Her eyes were sad and tinged by the same loneliness he felt so often. "There is no man for me."
"But if there were...what would he be like?"
When she didn"t answer right away, he gave her a knowing smile. "It"s not so easy to answer, now is it?"
A tiny smile teased the corner of her lips. "Point well taken, my lord. And you"re right. I don"t know who that man might be. But I know it"s not the obnoxiously spoiled prince my father would see me marry."
And he could well understand that.
"Lochlan!"
Lochlan turned at the sound of a familiar voice. It wasn"t until he saw the tall auburn-haired man that he realized who was calling him. It was his brother Sin"s foster brother and friend. "Simon,"
he said, extending his arm to the man as he joined them.
Simon shook it and clapped him on the back. "Long time since our paths last crossed, my friend.
How is everyone?"
"Doing very well, and you?"
Simon looked a bit sheepish. "Aside from the fact my wife is pregnant again and can"t get comfortable when she sits and has no compunction about letting me know it and sharing said pain, we"re all doing remarkably well."
Lochlan smiled before he realized that he hadn"t introduced them. "Lord Simon of Anwyk meet...Cat."
Cat arched a brow as Lochlan shortened her name for the first time. It actually made sense. The last thing they needed was to have someone recognize her or hear her name and become suspicious.
She didn"t know who Simon was, but he seemed an amiable enough fellow. "Lord Simon, "tis an honor to meet you."
He gave her a courtly bow. "And you, my lady." He looked back and forth between them expectantly.
"We"re friends," she explained.
"I see." But by his tone she could tell he was still trying to figure out their relationship.
Deciding to divert his attention, Cat asked a question of her own. "And how is it the two of you know one another?"
"Simon was the foster brother to my brother Sin and he"s Sin"s best friend," Lochlan explained.
Simon gave her a charming smile. "Aye. I have the scars to prove it."
She arched a brow at his light tone over such a matter. "Scars?"
Still Simon"s eyes twinkled merrily. "Hanging around Sin MacAllister and Stryder of Blackmoor can be quite hazardous to one"s health. As I said, I have quite the collection of scars to prove it."
She laughed. "So you"re friend to Stryder as well. How interesting. He is the reason we"re here."
"Aye," he said laughing, "Stryder is the one who told me Lochlan was here. He said you were seeking news of your brother Kieran."
Lochlan nodded. "Lord Stryder has agreed to see us to the Scot once the tourney ends to see if he is Kieran."
Cat was a bit confused by Simon"s ignorance. "If you were so close to Lochlan"s brother Sin, how did you not know that Kieran was Sin"s brother?"
"Family trees are seldom uncomplicated, my lady. At the time I knew Sin, I knew he was half- Scot, but never once in those days did he mention his family name at all. I knew nothing of the MacAllisters really from him until I"d returned from Outremer. Perhaps I should have made the connection then, but I, as everyone, a.s.sumed Kieran was dead and the two MacAllisters we knew in prison very seldom spoke to me of other brothers." He indicated Lochlan with a tilt of his head. "Lochlan was the only one they mentioned by name and, unfortunately, that name is rather common in the Highlands. I thought nothing of it until today."
It was sad to think he"d been that close to all of them and had never known. But then that was the way of life at times. "Having known them all so well, can you tell us if the Scot is Kieran MacAllister?"
Simon pa.s.sed a sympathetic look to Lochlan. "I don"t know any more than Stryder does. We buried the one brother and brought the other back to England. The one who survived would never speak a name. Then again, he seldom speaks at all. For the longest time we thought him mute from his injuries."
She cringed at the thought of the pain he must have known to be so altered. "What happened to them that night?"
"Honestly we don"t know. Again, whatever became of them when they stayed behind was never told. But it must have been horrible indeed. Neither of them was ever the kind of man to shirk from anything. And G.o.d and his saints know that I saw them survive things no man should suffer. I don"t even want to contemplate what it was that finally broke the Scot."
She looked at Lochlan, who remained silent, but she knew what he must be thinking. Kieran had indeed shirked from his family. He"d run from them all into a h.e.l.l unimaginable. It made her want to touch him, but she knew he wouldn"t welcome that.
Instead, Lochlan paused as if considering something. "Simon? Could I impose upon you to watch over Cat for a brief time? There"s a matter I need to attend to."
"Absolutely."
"My thanks."
Cat scowled at him as he walked away. "Well that was certainly abrupt."
"Were you two fighting?"
"Nay. I thought we were getting along famously...especially for us."
Simon shrugged. "Perhaps he had to rush to the privy."
She laughed at his unexpected comment. "Possibly. You were raised around all men, weren"t you?"