She mulled over this idea. Someone had taught her a little science. Her vocabulary revealed that. "How can it help us, or you, for that matter?"
"Anything that helps us to understand the function of your brain is important. Clearly if you"re decapitated, you die. Obviously the brain is vital to your survival. It"s perhaps the source of your immortality. Other parts of your body can be injured and heal rapidly but not the brain from what you"ve said. Why not? This is something we need to find out. Also how does the brain control your behavior? The brain is like a computer, hardwired to perform specific tasks in a specific manner, some believe from birth, but other evidence points to crucial windows of development open to stimulation in the first years of life to form the neurons vital to normal human behavior and intelligence. However we"ve also observed individuals suffering severe injuries being able to regain functions that should have been lost because other areas of the brain have taken over the work, indicating that maybe the hard wiring isn"t so hard and fast. The question for you seems to be where has the wiring been switched and where has it stayed the same."
A tantalizing smile appeared on her moist lips. "You make me sound like a machine, not a creature of flesh and blood."
He looked at her, all too flesh and blood for his comfort. "It"s just a way of looking at things. We"ve been accused of reducing the soul to a circuit board."
One feathery dark brow inched up. "What do you believe, Joe?"
He was taken aback. Just what did he believe? Was there a soul beyond the firing of the neurons? He couldn"t believe in anything he couldn"t explain, going through the motions of religion not to offend his family, but he didn"t really believe in G.o.d or an immortal soul. Still, what made an individual unique and human? That was certainly some kind of a soul. "I"m not really sure," he admitted.
"Only way to find out. Beats s.e.x a hundred to one. Tempted to be my partner in joy?"
"I"ll take your word for it."
"Let"s make it a standing invitation." A secretive little smile twitched the corners of her mouth. "Shall I continue?"
Joe nodded and resumed his seat.
"The intensity grew to be too much, we pulled apart, gasping with pleasure as we collapsed panting on the bed, our bodies wet with perspiration, barely touching but very aware of the other next to it. Then Ethan pulled over me and slid into my... "
Joe spoke up, "We can skip the next part."
"Jesus! Well, just let me say this, my darling doctor, no mortal male can compare, for sheer endurance or intensity, and Ethan was unbelievably skilled on top of that. There"s no human equivalent."
"Then why bother with mortals?"
"Blood is everything everything with mortals." She leaned forward, provocatively. "Unless of course we see our own qualities inherent in them... Well, the honeymoon was off to an arousing start. Honeymoons, however, have this habit of ending much too soon." with mortals." She leaned forward, provocatively. "Unless of course we see our own qualities inherent in them... Well, the honeymoon was off to an arousing start. Honeymoons, however, have this habit of ending much too soon."
Joe interrupted her again, "How old was he exactly?"
"As a mortal, he fought as a cavalry officer with Stuart and then became a confederate spy. Quite a history history but I didn"t learn much about it until later. At this point, it only served to romanticize him. but I didn"t learn much about it until later. At this point, it only served to romanticize him.
When we left my apartment that night, I left mortal existence behind forever. We went to the top of the Empire State Building to view the city. It was like a dream, overlooking it all from afar. I no longer felt kinship to mortals around us. A veil shimmered between us, through which I saw and heard in the abstract, like in a different dimension, one of light and air. They were plodding earthbound creatures- voices babble and faces featureless. Only Ethan was real.
All that night, we walked and talked together, along the waterfronts and through the parks, full of each other. Then as the sky began to lighten, we went to Ethan"s brownstone on the Upper East Side.
Hated the place. Dark, grim, thoroughly d.i.c.kensian d.i.c.kensian. All ma.s.sive dark mahogany and stiff horsehair in muddy colors, overly embellished. As Ethan closed heavy oak shutters and velvet drapes, the realization I"d never walk in the sun again came over me. Rushing to the door, I flung it open. He caught me and held me tightly as I struggled, beating my wings against the cage.
"We must stay indoors when the sun rises."
"I can"t be shut up! I"ll die if I go into one of those things!"
He shook with laughter as he realized what I was referring to. "We don"t sleep in coffins, you goose."
A strange numbness settled over me. "What will the sun do to us?"
"An agonizing death that unleashes a cancer and rots away your flesh."
"What about stakes through the heart?"
"Why these morbid questions, cara mia cara mia? You needn"t worry about anything, my precious girl. I"ll protect you always."
"From what?"
He chuckled, and set me down, locking various bolts and locks around the room with a key he placed safely into his pocket. Then he led me upstairs to a vast bed. I undressed and he tucked me in with a kiss. "Sweet dreams." He turned to leave. "I have telephone calls to make. I"ll be in directly. Sleep well, my love."
I was exhausted but still uncertain and apprehensive. I tossed and turned, but sleep soon got the better of me.
All at once, the shutters blew open and I was surrounded by a swirling snowstorm, blinded, cold and naked. Where was Ethan? Snow was filling the room and the sun would get me! I called out for him but he didn"t answer. Then a tall figure with long, pale hair emerged from the snow, with arms extended, saying, "Who will go with him?" I cowered on the bed and screamed, as he reached out to take me by the throat. I cowered on the bed and screamed, as he reached out to take me by the throat.
"Mia, my darling? What"s wrong?"
My eyes opened on Ethan, lying nude next to me in the bed. It was just a dream.
"A nightmare- is it nighttime again already?"
"Come see the change!"
He took my hands and led me over to the tall cheval mirror.
My eyes were brighter, my hair more l.u.s.trous and my skin very pale, but otherwise, I looked much the same. "We cast a reflection?"
"You"re no ghoul. You are reborn! Everything lost in man"s ascent is restored, animal powers, coupled with heightened awareness and understanding. Your immune system is enhanced to the point where all diseases are rendered harmless. Your body is capable of healing serious wounds in a relatively short time. You are stronger, faster and have superior powers of hearing, scent and sight."
"Like Superman?"
He was delighted. "You"ve read of Nietzsche"s Ubermensch Ubermensch?"
"No- the comic book hero- the one in the red cape?"
He frowned as he preened in the mirror. "I"m afraid I"m ignorant of this paragon."
"Actually, you kinda look like him."
Ethan placed my hands on the naked expanse of his chest, over his beating heart. The blood running through his body lulled me into a semi-hypnotic state as he spoke. "We"re flesh and blood, whatever the legends say, a highly specialized predatory animal, with an intellect and capacity to love and desire as a human being, but superior to them in every way. A Superman Superman if you will." if you will."
A chill ran through me. Images of torch light parades, swastikas and pathetic corpses stacked in pits of lime flashed through my brain. I was about to protest when horrible throbbing started in my head and my body was suddenly racked. Even the abortion hadn"t hurt this much.
I cried, clutching him. "Ethan! What"s the matter? What"s this pain?"
"Hunger," he told me simply. "You must feed."
That"s it! Joe thought. Joe thought. Pain Pain drove her to appease this monster invading her body. It caused her intense physical distress, propelling her to take human life without a thought. "It"s an intense physical urge, painful? When does this usually start?" drove her to appease this monster invading her body. It caused her intense physical distress, propelling her to take human life without a thought. "It"s an intense physical urge, painful? When does this usually start?"
"A week or so after I"ve completely fed, I feel a twinge." Suddenly she took to her feet. "You really don"t give a s.h.i.t about me me, do you?"
Joe sat up and snapped his notebook shut. "What?"
Sparks ignited in her eyes. "Asking you a question, this is the time for questions?"
"I"m supposed to ask you you questions." questions."
"Hardly seems fair."
"Your question sounded a h.e.l.l of a lot like an accusation." He stood up, holding his hands out before her. "Without you Mia, there"s no project. You"re the key to the door to immortality."
"The child I aborted was immortality."
"That"s not what we"re here to discuss."
Her voice hit a dangerously low note, "Get the f.u.c.k out."
"No." Joe stood his ground awaiting attack as sweat beaded alarmingly on his forehead. She crouched on the chair, a bobcat ready to pounce. Instinct told him to show no fear. It turned out to be the best course of action.
She suddenly shrugged, as if killing him wasn"t worth the trouble, and sank back down into the chair. "You"re just as much of a monster as I am. Just look around you- at the b.e.s.t.i.a.lity of the human race."
"That"s what you see."
"Until you convince me otherwise- get out- I"m sick of you poking around in my soul! f.u.c.king men, always trying to penetrate me in one way or another... "
"Then why are you here exactly, Mia?"
She threw her head back, laughing like Garbo. "I want to walk in the sun, and laugh as the old demons destruct all around me."
"Don"t bulls.h.i.t me."
She merely shook her head. Disgusted, Joe packed up his bag to leave. She crossed the room to the desk, opening the drawer and took out an envelope, extending it imperiously toward him. Annoyed, Joe took it and left, making his way to Kurt"s cell.
Kurt"s small figure stood before the immense piano, not playing it, just staring at his hands on the keys. He looked as if he had just came from the shower, in jeans but shirtless, hair a ma.s.s of damp ringlets, the scent of herbal soap clinging to him, skin flushed. Once again, the light was dim, casting long Citizen Kane-like shadows across the room. Joe cleared his throat. "I"m not disturbing you?"
Kurt looked up. "What can I do for you, Doctor?"
"A letter for you."
The vampire approached, fluidly with dignified grace, distant and cool in manner. Joe towered over him, but it still didn"t make him feel any safer.
Kurt extended his hand languidly for the letter. As he did, Joe saw in a flash something that made his skin crawl. There on the paleness of Kurt"s slender forearm were numbers tattooed in blue ink. Joe couldn"t help but gawk.
"Why do you stare?" Kurt snapped.
"I had no idea... "
"Well, now you know."
"You must"ve been just a kid."
Kurt"s voice grew hard-edged, as he turned away and reached for his shirt, "One grows up fast."
Joe suspected Kurt had a history, but this wasn"t quite what he"d imagined. In a concentration camp- and for how long before this happened to him? It explained the frail appearance he"d carry with him for eternity. What complicated memories motivated him? What demons haunted him and did he wear them tattooed on his brain like the horrifying numbers on his skin?
"I"m sorry."
"I don"t need your pity."
"I expect you don"t."
"Mia will fill you in." Kurt began to b.u.t.ton his shirt.
"I need you to answer a question for me. She"s driven me crazy with it."
Kurt looked up at him, white face frozen into a polite mask. "Mia may be often infuriating, but never dull."
"She says she sees certain... potential in me. Can you see it, too?"
Kurt looked deeply into Joe"s eyes, and then abruptly pushed up the cuff of his shirt. "You saw this?"
The inky blue numbers stood out in sharp contrast to the vampire"s white skin.
"Yes," he answered, not really wanting to meet Kurt"s eyes. Another level of tension zapped their encounter, as a long-buried ancestral demon raised its head.
"I"ve seen such potential in mortals." Kurt looked hard at Joe, boundless rage blazing in his eyes. Joe knew better than to flinch and held his ground, staring back. Kurt slid his sleeve back over his arm. "It"s there. However, I see it in them all all."
"Am I somehow destined to become- a monster?"
Kurt shrugged, turning back to the piano. "That"s up to you." He began tapping out a melody with one finger. "There"s a letter on the table, Doctor."
"About Mia... "
Kurt"s voice scaled up boyishly with tension, "Mia can be difficult."
"She claims to want to walk in the sun and watch the old demons destruct around her."
"Our culture is older than any existing nation of men and our customs aren"t enlightened. We"re slaves. Of course she wants to see them fall."
"And this project will hasten that?"
"Perhaps, we"ll all all be worse off, but we can never go back to that world." be worse off, but we can never go back to that world."
"Who"s hunting you?"
"We don"t know- only that there"s a bounty on our heads."
"I"m doing my best to make it more tolerable for you here."
"Mia is the only thing that could possibly make it tolerable." His voice filled with longing, "How is she?"
"Well, we had an argument. She"s p.i.s.sed."