"You promise me that? Solemnly?" She still smiled.
"Yes. It is a promise. I will keep it. I will be your friend always.
Give me something to do for you. It will make it easier."
"What can I ask you to do? I shall never dare to speak to you about my life again."
"I think you will, when you see that I am just as I used to be. And you forgive me, quite?"
"Yes. I must. We must forget to-day. It must be as though it had never happened. Will you forget it?"
"I will try." But of that he knew the utter impossibility.
"If you try, you can succeed. Now get up. Be reasonable."
He took her hand in both of his. She made a movement to withdraw it, and then submitted. He barely touched it with his lips and rose to his feet instantly.
"Thank you," she said simply.
She had never had such a mastery of charm over him as at that moment.
But his mood was changed, and there was no breaking out of the other man in him, though he felt again the quick sharp throb in the temples, and the rising blood at his throat. The higher self was dominant once more, and the features was as still as a statue"s.
He took leave of her very quickly and went out into the damp street and faced the gusty southeast wind.
When he was gone, she rose and went to the window with a listless step, and gazed idly through the gla.s.s at the long row of windows in the palace opposite, and then went back and sank down, as though very weary, upon a sofa far from the light. There was a dazed, wondering look in her face and she sat very still for a long time, till it began to grow dark.
In the dusk she rose and went to the piano and sang softly to herself.
Her voice never swelled to a full note, and the chords which her fingers sought were low and gentle and dreamy.
While she was singing, the door opened noiselessly, and Reanda came in and stood beside her. She broke off and looked up, a little startled.
The same wondering, half-dazed look was in her face. Her husband bent down and kissed her, and she kissed him silently.
CHAPTER XXVI.
DONNA FRANCESCA had put off her mourning, and went into the world again during that winter. The world said that she might marry if she so pleased, and was somewhat inclined to wonder that she did not. She could have made a brilliant match if she had chosen. But instead, though she appeared everywhere where society was congregated together, she showed a tendency to religion which surprised her friends.
A tendency to religion existed in the Braccio family, together with various other tendencies not at all in harmony with it, nor otherwise edifying. Those other tendencies seemed to be absent in Francesca, and little by little her acquaintances began to speak of her as a devout person. The Prince of Gerano even hinted that she might some day be an abbess in the Carmelite Convent at Subiaco, as many a lady of the great house had been before her. But Francesca was not prepared to withdraw from the world altogether, though at the present time she was very unhappy.
She suspected herself of a great sin, besides reproaching herself bitterly with many of her deeds which deserved no blame at all. Yet she was by no means morbid, nor naturally inclined to perpetual self-examination. On the contrary, she had always been willing to accept life as a simple affair which could not offer any difficulties provided that one were what she meant by "good"--that is, honest in word and deed, and scrupulous in doing thoroughly and with right intention those things which her religion required of her, but in which only she herself could judge of her own sincerity.
Of late, however, she had felt that there was something very wrong in all her recent life. The certainty of it dawned by degrees, and then burst upon her suddenly one day when she was with Reanda.
She had long ago noticed the change in his manner, the hara.s.sed look, and the sad ring in his voice, and for a time his suffering was her sorrow, and there was a painful pleasure in being able to feel for him with all her heart. He had gone through a phase which had lasted many months, and the change was great between his former and his present self. He had suffered, but indifference was creeping upon him. It was clear enough. Nothing interested him but his art, and perhaps her own conversation, though even that seemed doubtful to her.
They were alone together on a winter"s afternoon in the great hall. The work was almost done, and they had been talking of the more mechanical decorations, and of the style of the furniture.
"It is a big place," said Francesca, "but I mean to fill it. I like large rooms, and when it is finished, I will take up my quarters here, and call it my boudoir."
She smiled at the idea. The hall was at least fifty feet long by thirty wide.
"All the women I know have wretched little sitting-rooms in which they can hardly turn round," she said. "I will have all the s.p.a.ce I like, and all the air and all the light. Besides, I shall always have the dear Cupid and Psyche, to remind me of you."
She spoke the last words with the simplicity of absolute innocence.
"And me?" he asked, as innocently and simply as she. "What will you do with me?"
"Whatever you like," she said, taking it quite for granted, as he did, that he was to work for her all his life. "You can have a studio in the house, just as it used to be, if you please. And you can paint the great canvas for the ceiling of the dining-room. Or shall I restore the old chapel? Which should you rather do--oil-painting, or fresco?"
"You would not want the altar piece which I should paint," he said, with sudden sadness.
"Santa Francesca?" she asked. "It would have to be Santa Francesca. The chapel is dedicated to her. You could make a beautiful picture of her--a portrait, perhaps--" she stopped.
"Of yourself? Yes, I could do that," he answered quickly.
"No," she said, and hesitated. "Of your wife," she added rather abruptly.
He started and looked at her, and she was sorry that she had spoken.
Gloria"s beautiful face had risen in her mind, and it had seemed generous to suggest the idea. Finding a difficulty in telling him, she had thought it her duty to be frank.
He laughed harshly before he answered her.
"No," he said. "Certainly not a portrait of my wife. Not even to please you. And that is saying much."
He spoke very bitterly. In the few words, he poured out the pent-up suffering of many months. Francesca turned pale.
"I know, and it is my fault," she said in a low voice.
"Your fault? No! But it is not mine."
His hands trembled violently as he took up his palette and brushes and began to mix some colours, not knowing what he was doing.
"It is my fault," said Francesca, still very white, and staring at the brick floor. "I have seen it. I could not speak of it. You are unhappy--miserable. Your life is ruined, and I have done it. I!"
She bit her lip almost before the last word was uttered; for it was stronger and louder than she had expected it to be, and the syllable rang with a despairing echo in the empty hall.
Reanda shook his head, and bent over his colours with shaking hands, but said nothing.
"I was so happy when you were married," said Francesca, forcing herself to speak calmly. "She seemed such a good wife for you--so young, so beautiful. And she loves you--"
"No." He shook his head energetically. "She does not love me. Do not say that, for it is not true. One does not love in that way--to-day a kiss, to-morrow a sting--to-day honey, to-morrow snake-poison. Do not say that it is love, for it is not true. The heart tells the truth, all alone in the breast. A thousand words cannot make it tell one lie. But for me--it is finished. Let us speak no more of love. Let us talk of our good friendship. It is better."
"Eh, let us speak of it, of this friendship! It has cost tears of blood!"
Francesca, in the sincerity of what she felt, relapsed into the Roman dialect. Almost all Romans do, under any emotion.
"Everything pa.s.ses," answered Reanda, laying his palette aside, and beginning to walk up and down, his hands in his pockets. "This also will pa.s.s," he added, as he turned. "We are men. We shall forget."