Fats slowly led the way. There were a few narrow spots he almost got stuck in and only made it through by holding his breath. Panzi was not only in pain as he was dragged along, but his face was directly in line with Fats"s a.s.s. "You"d better not fart right now," he muttered.
Fats was too short of breath to respond, and from his silence, I could tell he was exhausted. The three of us crawled like worms for heaven knows how long. Then Fats suddenly whispered, "I can see light!" He abruptly increased his speed, making Panzi cry "Take it easy!" as the faster pace jostled his wounds. But Fats continued to climb more and more swiftly, which-considering his size-was almost a miracle.
I could see the light myself; it grew brighter as we climbed. I told myself that we just might have lucked out; maybe we"d soon be back above ground.
Fats was already climbing up into the light and the minute he was out, I heard him yell, "Holy s.h.i.t, where in the h.e.l.l are we now?"
Chapter Eighteen.
TREE OF DEATH.
I carefully climbed out of the tunnel and found only a small ledge to stand on. It jutted out from a cliff that looked as though it was hundreds of feet high. Gusts of strong wind blew toward us and I had to cling to the wall of the cliff as I checked out our new surroundings.
Like Fats, I had no idea of where the h.e.l.l we were now. On the side of the cliff was a gigantic natural cave roughly the size of a soccer field. It had a huge crack in its ceiling where just enough moonlight shone through to make the cavern"s outline visible.
I was standing near the cave wall to the west. There was nothing above or below me to support any climbing activity. I glanced around and discovered that surrounding us were many other cave openings, all closely packed together. It looked like there could be tens of thousands of them, making the area look as if it had been swept a few dozen times by many different high-caliber machine guns.
The most amazing thing was a gigantic, towering tree in the middle of the cave that was closest to me. It looked about ten stories high, and probably could not be encircled even if ten men stretched their arms around it. Covering it was a huge number of vines as thick as telephone poles, intertwined and crisscrossed, nearly engulfing everything they touched. Their tendrils hung down like weeping willow branches, some of them swinging in midair, some touching the ground. Other vines extended into the openings of the other caves and spread almost everywhere in my field of vision.
As I looked more closely, I could see many objects hanging from the tree"s branches. At first I thought they were fruit, but they were the wrong size and shape for that to be true. Hidden behind a thick, dense layer of vines, they swung as the wind blew.
There was a round stone veranda at the bottom of this cave, leading from a small piece of construction that looked like a worship platform. It stretched all the way to the branches of the mammoth tree, and at the other end I could dimly see another platform. On that had been placed a bed made out of jade, with what looked like a man lying upon it. But it was too far away, and since I could only faintly make out the outlines of what I saw, I dared not reach a conclusion.
Fats was very excited, shouting, "s.h.i.t, I"ve looked everywhere! This must be the main chamber of the Western Zhou dynasty tomb. It"s definitely the body of the Ruler of Dead Soldiers lying on top of that jade platform. What a wicked old b.a.s.t.a.r.d-a vulture who stole the nest of a dove. He robbed someone"s grave and then used that tomb for himself. On behalf of heaven, I"ll punish him today for his lack of professional ethics. He"ll suffer the fate of any dishonest grave robber!"
Obviously Fats was so upset he was able to overlook his own lack of professional ethics.
Panzi remarked, "You"d better not act too rashly and blindly. This Ruler is beyond anything we could expect to discover. I think there are traps waiting for us in this place. We"d better find a way to get up to the top of the cliff and climb to safe terrain before we do anything else."
I raised my head to look up and was speechless. To climb to the cliff"s top would be a horrendous task- especially since we"d have to hang almost upside down as we climbed to safety. We weren"t Spiderman-how could we possibly do this?
I turned to ask Fats his opinion but half his body was already hanging off the cliff. Apparently he had not listened to a thing Panzi said. He was agile and swift, and there was no way I could stop him. In a few moments he was already about six feet down the cliff. He was near the opening of another cave and ready to keep going when a hand reached out of the opening and grabbed him by the leg.
Fats began to kick violently in hopes of dislodging the hand. Then from the cave came a man"s voice, "Don"t move! If you take one more step you"ll be dead." It was the voice of Uncle Three, and exultantly I shouted, "Uncle Three, is it you?"
The man sounded surprised as he said, "Nephew. Where the h.e.l.l did you go? You worried the s.h.i.t out of me! Are you okay?"
It was indeed Uncle Three. I was relieved, and exclaimed, "I"m all right, but Panzi is wounded! It"s all because of this fat guy!" I stuck my head out, but the cave below was in the blind spot of the protruding ledge I was standing on. I could only see half of Fats"s leg, so I gave up. I could hear Fats yelling, "Comrade, could you please let go of my leg?"
Uncle Three cursed loudly, "Where the h.e.l.l did you come from? G.o.d d.a.m.n it, you better shut up and come down quickly. Be careful where you put your feet and don"t touch that vine."
Fats cried, "Which one, do you mean this one?" as he pointed toward a tendril with his toes. Uncle Three screamed, "Don"t!" as the vine suddenly rose up into the air like a snake ready to strike, its end opening into the shape of a flower. It looked like a ghost"s hand as it waved in midair, following every motion that Fats made. As I watched I realized that the little green hand on my shoulder had actually been the end of a vine like this one.
Fats had the vine moving with him in unison, dancing with it in a teasing arabesque, like an Indian snake charmer playing with a cobra. He"s crazy, I thought, no wonder he"s all alone. If we let him stick with us, he"s going to get us all killed.
Uncle Three was furious, roaring, "I"m asking you, are you done yet? Do you know what you"re dealing with? Get down here right now!" But Fats was in trouble. The vine had wound around his leg like a boa constrictor and had nearly dragged him to the edge of the precipice.
Earlier, when we tussled with the smaller handlike vine for control of the pistol, not even Fats and I together could counter the force of just one of these plants. Now Fats was succ.u.mbing to the strength of the vine that had him captive, and I had to try to help him.
I began to look for a rock to throw but the shelf we stood upon was without any debris. As I scrabbled about searching for something to use as a missile, I felt the muscles in my leg tighten. Looking down, I cried out, "s.h.i.t!" A ghostly green hand had come out of nowhere and had wrapped itself around my leg.
I looked for something to hold onto, but it was too late. A strong force had already pulled me away from safety and my body was hurled into midair.
It felt like I had reached zero gravity. Neither my hands nor my feet could feel anything solid. Then I was flung heavily against the wall of the cliff-it was like being bludgeoned with solid rock. I could feel my heart"s blood rise in my throat and I almost vomited up my life. Then I felt the vine increase its force and begin to pull me downward. My hands flailed about but I could find nothing to hold-and then I was in free fall. I closed my eyes. I was finished. There was no way I could survive this.
Three or four other vines had noticed me and rolled toward me from the cliff. One of them was especially thick and wrapped itself around my waist. Hanging in midair, I was like a fried doughnut that had been twisted and wrapped around itself several times. Then the thick vine pulled with a sudden burst of force, my head landed on the cliff wall, and I was dragged along the rocks. I felt the vines pulling me downward as I collided with branches and stones. Not one part of my body escaped the impact of this violent ordeal. My eyes saw tiny pinpoints of light, my brain echoed with agony, and I almost lost consciousness.
When I hazily realized I was no longer moving, I felt extremely nauseated and dizzy. I wanted to open my eyes, but my vision was blurred as if a layer of gauze had covered my face. I took a few deep breaths and slowly gathered my strength as my vision gradually became clearer. I found I was hanging upside down on a branch of the mammoth tree. Below my head lay the stone platform with the mysterious corpse.
I looked again and was stupefied. On the platform lay not just one corpse, but also the body of a young woman beside it. Her corpse was covered with white cloth, her eyes were closed, her face was calm. She looked pretty and charming, with no sign of decay on her body. If I weren"t looking closely, I would have thought she was only sleeping. The male body next to her wore a bronze mask that was the face of a fox. Armor enclosed his entire body; both of his hands were placed on his chest; and in them was a box made of purple-enameled gold.
As I stared closely at the corpse in armor, I felt quite uneasy without knowing why. I looked closely at his head and saw through the eyeholes near the top of the mask, two green eyeb.a.l.l.s staring at me.
Chapter Nineteen.
THE FEMALE CORPSE.
The cold, flat stare of those eyes made my hair stand on end. I couldn"t stop looking at them as I hung there like a sausage in a butcher shop with no way to escape. All I could do was pray to find a way to free myself.
At least fifteen minutes pa.s.sed, without the eyeb.a.l.l.s rolling or blinking even once, and I began to think this might just be an illusion. But the strange eyes kept staring right into mine; even if they had been the eyes of a G.o.d, that would have been bound to make me uncomfortable.
I looked away and thought, I"d better come up with a way out quick. If I continue hanging upside down like this, my brain will sooner or later burst from all of my blood flowing into it.
Using all of my remaining strength, I raised my head and found I was almost completely covered with bruises and my legs were ensnared by a vine. I turned around, and almost vomited-all around me as far as I could see were corpses hanging from the branches of the tree. It looked as though there were tens of thousands of them, swaying in the wind, like a wind chime made up of human bones.
There were human bodies and animal carca.s.ses too. Most of them were dry bones but some were still rotting and stunk terribly. Corpse-eaters of all sizes crowded together like mosquitoes, nibbling on the decomposing bodies. I was grateful I had wiped some of Poker-face"s blood from Panzi"s body onto my own, since that seemed to be keeping them away from me. Although I felt guilty for taking somebody else"s blood, guilt was still better than losing my shoulder or leg.
Suddenly I remembered that, like me, Fats had also been captured, and I began to worry about him. But when I looked about, it was hard to see through the vines that surrounded me. I searched my pockets but all I had with me was my digital camera, which was of no use in this predicament.
As I felt annoyed and upset with myself, the vine around my legs suddenly loosened. My entire body sank downward, and I thought I was about to fall to my death. I covered my head with my arms for protection but discovered the vine had only loosened a trifle.
When I opened my eyes, I saw that I was almost face-to-face with the female corpse. If I fell just a little farther, our lips would touch. I pulled my neck back with all of my might and tucked my lips into my mouth so it would be impossible for me to kiss the dead woman. Then suddenly I caught sight of a small dagger attached to the waist of the armored man that lay beside her. My heart lightened and I whispered, "My fair lady, I am now compelled by this situation to ask your friend if I can borrow his knife. I hope he won"t mind?"
I twisted my waist and stretched my arm out towards the dagger with every ounce of my strength. After swinging back and forth several times, my hand caught the dagger"s handle. I pulled it with all the force I could muster; the knife was attached so tightly that I pulled off the belt that held it and all of its contents.
s.h.i.t! I thought, Now that I"ve stolen his belt, this corpse is bound to turn hostile if he has any power at all. I quickly clamped onto the belt with both legs and pulled out the dagger with all of my might. The blade flashed, letting me know at once that this was a fine weapon and a gift from the heavens. Quickly I cut away the vines that bound me to the tree branch, without thinking what my liberated body might fall upon. With no time to regret my lack of forethought, in only the fraction of a second, my whole body landed on top of the female corpse.
To be honest, I was lucky to have held my breath when I fell so I didn"t land with the pressure of my full weight. Otherwise I"m sure that my bulk would have pressed ancient feces from the woman"s body. But even so, there was no distance between my body and hers; my mouth was directly on her dead lips in the kiss I had feared only seconds before, and chills racked my spine.
As I lay as still as a wooden statue, I thought of her tongue entering my mouth and going straight down my throat to suck out all my internal organs. I supposed I should be grateful that I was kissing the corpse of a beautiful woman-if she had been a man I would be dead from disgust by now.
Time pa.s.sed with no tongue issuing from her mouth and I thought, my luck hasn"t run out yet. At last I"ve met a merciful tomb inhabitant. Slowly I lifted up my head and began to move it slowly away from the dead woman. My head was raised only halfway when a stream of fragrance burst into the air and the female corpse"s arms wrapped around my neck in a firm embrace.
I was petrified; my whole body froze. The armored corpse beside her began to make a rattling noise and I knew I was in trouble. I yelled silently, "Brother, don"t get me wrong- it"s your wife who"s. .h.i.tting on me."
Turning my head, I saw the sound had come from a piece of armor that fell from the belt I had just taken from the male corpse. That was a relief-as was my grateful realization that it was the female corpse that had her arms around me instead of the monster next to her. Otherwise I would certainly have p.i.s.sed myself.
The ghastly embrace lasted for over ten seconds. When I saw that the female corpse had not made any other moves on me, I began to stealthily move my head out from under her arms. But when I moved, her arms moved with me, following my every move-when I leaned forward, she leaned forward; and when I moved backward, she did the same.
I thought I could break free by simply lifting my head and sliding away with a somersault. But I hadn"t realized how tightly her arms were wrapped around my neck, and when I raised my head, I ended up pulling her to a seated position. With the jolt of this motion, the lips of the female corpse parted, revealing something inside her mouth.
Chapter Twenty.
THE KEY.
In the mouth of this lovely corpse was what seemed to be a copper key inset with an extraordinary dark green pearl. I wasn"t completely sure that was what the jewel was, but I knew that sometimes our ancestors put pearls into the mouths of the dead as a way to prevent corruption. If I removed this key, this thousand-year-old dead beauty might instantly turn into a mummy before my eyes.
I didn"t have the courage to do such a terrifying thing, yet my present situation was rather awkward. I was imprisoned in a dead woman"s embrace, and there was no way I could carry her with me and run to safety at the same time.
As I was hesitating over what to do next, I suddenly heard someone shouting from above me. I looked up and saw a man, hanging upside down and yelling as he struggled with seven or eight branches at the same time. It was that G.o.dd.a.m.n Fats, looking as though he was ready to give up. He was even more bruised than I was, although he didn"t appear to have collided with the cliff wall in his descent.
He cursed to himself, "f.u.c.k, I didn"t expect these c.o.c.k-sucking branches to have such tremendous strength!" Then he caught sight of me and said, "Little comrade, what are you doing to that pretty girl?"
I didn"t know whether to laugh or scream. But I didn"t dare speak too loudly, so I muttered to Fats, "f.u.c.k you- she"s dead. Help me think of something quickly!"
"Ah!" Fats exhaled; he wiggled his b.u.t.t in midair and said, "But I still have to come down first!" I threw the dagger in my hand upward and he caught it, turned, and immediately began to cut away the vines. At first I did not realize the mistake he was making, and when I did it was already too late.
Before I could tell him to wait a minute, Fats fell right on top of the armored corpse, knocking off his mask. I was about to poke up my head to take a look when Fats shouted, "Don"t look. This is a green-eyed fox-corpse!"
His warning came too late. I had already seen the face that had been concealed by the mask. My brain buzzed and my body was awash with goose b.u.mps. I stammered, "How could that ever have been a man?"
Under the mask was a piercingly white face. As I looked carefully, I could only faintly see where its nose and mouth had once been. There was no hair anywhere on its head. Even its eyebrows were gone. The shape of its face was so pointed it was deformed, with eyes that had become only two narrow slits that glowed with a green light.
The face really did look like a foxlike human with a malignant smile. Its strangest features were those two green eyeb.a.l.l.s, which were so truly horrifying that I dared not look into them directly. I was becoming accustomed to seeing corpses but this creature was capable of scaring me to death with his gaze.
Fats was terrified as well. He rolled off the jade platform as quickly as he could, saying in amazement, "I can"t believe it! How can the Ruler of Dead Soldiers actually look so hideously disgusting!"
"Is this really the Ruler?" I asked. "How come he looks like...like a fox?"
As his eyes wandered up and down the armored corpse, Fats replied, "I had a friend who once told me that this sort of creature is called a green-eyed fox-corpse. A long time ago, a man robbed a grave from an unknown dynasty. When he opened the cover of the coffin, he found a green-eyed fox lying on top of the corpse. The fox was a demon, and it was a bad omen that it was lying there. The rule was that everything in the grave was supposed to remain intact and in place, but the grave robber was inexperienced and took a jade turtle away with him when he left. Some years later, he quit this career and returned to his village to marry the woman who waited for him there. His wife got pregnant, and during her delivery, the midwife screamed and fainted. The man rushed to the bedside and saw that their newborn baby had a pair of long, squinty green eyes. The man at first did not realize it was the fox demon at work. He merely thought the child had a strange disease, and searched everywhere for doctors who could cure it. The child"s sickness not only became worse, but his hair began to fall out and his face also began to look more and more like that of a fox. It was only then that the grave robber realized what had caused this misfortune, so he made a long and difficult journey back to the ancient tomb and put the jade turtle back in the coffin. From then on, the child"s sickness got no worse but his strange, foxlike face never went away."
Fats sighed and said, "The eyes of this green-eyed fox-corpse are very powerful. I"ve heard that if you give him one look, your face will eventually become like his. Did you look at him a minute ago?"
Although I did not completely believe it, hearing that my face might turn the same as this monster"s made me shiver. "Stop talking nonsense! Whether my face will change or not isn"t the problem," I shouted. "Just help me get out of this dead woman"s arms before you say another word!"
Fats realized it was foolish for him to babble on like this and he began to try to release me. He tried to break the corpse"s grip, but her arms were as immovable as if they were made of iron and he only ended up panting with exhaustion.
Seeing the worried look in my eyes he said to me in a comforting tone, "Don"t worry. I have plenty of tricks. If this doesn"t work, I can always cut off her arms."
I screamed, "No way! What if there"s poison inside her body? You can"t do that. Besides, I don"t have a grain of hatred for her. To cut her arms off at first meeting would be too uncivilized and merciless."
Fats shook his head. There was no other solution.
He said to me, "Generally speaking, when a dead body remains soft and flexible, it harbors unfulfilled wishes. If you help her get her wish, she will let you go. Why don"t you think now-a moment ago when she hooked her arms around you, did anything unusual happen?"
Then I remembered that when I first raised my head, her mouth had suddenly fallen open, revealing something that looked like a key inside it. Perhaps this was a clue to the woman"s unfulfilled wish. Very gently I moved the female corpse"s head upright, and softly whispered, "Forgive my offense!" Then I pressed her cheeks; her apricot-colored lips parted and her mouth opened. There under her tongue was the copper key inlaid with a pearl.
Fats gasped with surprise. "s.h.i.t, this is great! She must certainly want you to take that key out. You see how small her mouth is? It must be really uncomfortable to hold a key in there."
Anxiously I asked, "If she bites me, what will I do?"
Fats replied impatiently, "Do you see how many vulnerable spots you have all over your body? She could bite you anytime and anywhere she wants. Why would she want to bite your hand?"
He had a point, and I told myself that it wouldn"t be such a big deal to lose a finger or two anyway. So I took a deep breath, and began to stretch my two trembling fingers towards her mouth. When I had almost reached her lips, a voice beside my ear said, "Stop."
Chapter Twenty-One.
THE GREEN-EYED FOX-CORPSE.
My G.o.d, I thought, that"s Uncle Three"s voice, but isn"t he still up on the cliff? How could he sound so close to me? Turning around to look for him, I saw only Fats-n.o.body else was there. Then I heard Uncle Three again. "Your hand is warm and alive now but the minute you put it in that corpse"s mouth, you"ll be dead meat. Don"t be so stupid."
I listened hard to find the source of the voice-it seemed to be coming from under the jade platform and baffled, I asked, "Uncle Three, how did you get beneath this platform?"
"I"ll explain to you later," my uncle"s voice replied. "Just now, do as I tell you-lower the woman"s head, press your thumb against her throat, and then hit her on the back of the head once. Remember to push on her throat with your thumb or she"ll swallow the key." I nodded and obeyed, pressing on the throat of the female corpse and lightly striking the back of her head. The key flew out of her mouth, landing on the jade platform.
I immediately felt my shoulders relax as the arms of the female corpse fell away from me and her body lay flat on the platform. I let out a long sigh of relief as I realized I had been released from the dead woman"s embrace. Then I heard Uncle Three speaking from below, "Nephew, is Fats still next to you?"
I lifted my head and saw that Fats had already picked up the key and was inspecting it carefully. "Yes, he is," I nodded.
"Take a look," Uncle Three said in the Hangzhou dialect, "and tell me if he casts a shadow."
I didn"t understand what my uncle meant. Obediently I glanced sideways at Fats"s feet but saw only the jade bed where his shadow should have been. Without raising my head, I was unable to see if his shadow was visible or not. "I can"t see him clearly right now," I said.
Uncle Three sounded agitated as he told me, "Listen to me. I"ll tell you something-don"t be scared. On the way here just now, I looked closely at that guy"s body. You have to be careful. Fats is not human."