He didn"t know what made her different. Only that he liked her because she was. Her voice and her expressions were always soft. Her care and concern seemed genuine. Their conversations were never very long, but he got to know her in those brief moments just outside their apartment doors. She lived across the hall from him on the third floor of their building. The building was secure. So only those who had a key card, or had been buzzed in by one of the residents, could enter. She was just starting to unlock her apartment when he opened his door."Hey, Lottatna?" Resetarits asked.
"Hmm?" she asked, turning from her door, with key in hand.
"Are you alright?" He stood with his shoulders hunched and his arms close to his chest. His eyes curious, yet wary.
"After a little work on myself I should be."
"Do you mind if I ask what"s depressed your spirit tonight?"
"Another piece of non-acceptance."
"Yes, that does happen."
Lottatna nodded. "Thank you for caring enough to ask, Resetarits."
"I know you"d do the same, Lottatna."
She reached toward him tonight as if to embrace him, but he shied away from her touch. She stopped. "What"s the matter?"
"I"ll tell you another time. I should let you sleep so you can watch the sunrise."
"Okay. Have a good night."
"You, too."
Resetarits backed into his apartment, closed, and locked the door.
When morning came, he left his apartment for a few hours to look for a job. No one was hiring someone of his skill set and need. He returned with haste to his apartment to avoid getting caught in the growing crowds. Resetarits pulled out his key to unlock his door and noticed a piece of paper taped to his door. He took it down and opened it.
"When would be a good time to talk? I want to know more about you. —Lottatna."
He took the note into his apartment. He was frightened, yet elated. He picked up a writing utensil and wrote his response beneath it.
"I"ll meet you at the Snow Dragon at 7pm."
Then he carefully taped the note on her door.
He read for a little while then decided to leave for the Snow Dragon early. He didn"t have a car and hoped to save them a seat so he could avoid the wait and have to stand close to someone else. Once seated in a booth, Resetarits watched the door for Lottatna. The moment he saw her, he stood. She noticed and came in. As she approached him and he motioned for her to sit on the bench across from him. He still stood hunched over and when he sat, he folded his legs under him.
"How are you doing tonight, Resetarits?" Lottatna asked.
"Unsure," he replied. "What prompted the sudden invitation?"
"I felt I needed to get to know you. You"re always sincere when we talk, no matter how short our conversations. But I realized, I hadn"t gotten to know a lot about you."
"I feel I don"t know much about you either, other than you are the only one kind enough to take a moment to talk with me."
"Do you not have many friends?" she asked.
He shook his head and looked down at the table.
"Do you mind if I ask where you are from?"
A waitress brought them water, delaying Resetarits" response as she took their order and left again.
Resetarits thought a moment when they were alone again. "It"s a place far from here, whose name is impossible for any non-native to p.r.o.nounce."
"Then I won"t try, but will you tell me the name of this place?"
"Chdrtlsy."
Lottatna nodded. "Indeed I would slaughter the name if I attempted to say it."
He nodded. "Do you have many friends, Lottatna?"
"Acquaintances. Really good work a.s.sociates. One or two I may be able to call friend."
"Why so few? You"re amazing!"
"I have yet to find anyone, outside my a.s.sociates, who can accept the fact that I am an energy worker."
"But that is only a small part of you. There is more to you than one gift—one profession."
"And yet it"s that part that closes any opening a greeting might create."
A thoughtful expression crossed his face. "The small part you are unwilling change about yourself that brings about the greatest form of non-acceptance."
She nodded. "So, what about you, Resetarits? Why do you feel that people turn you away?"
"I"m afraid to tell you. Bad things tend to happen when others know more about me."
"Bad in what way?"
Resetarits" mouth frowned as he lifted his gla.s.s for a sip of water. "Just bad," he replied, setting it down.
"Fair. Have you been able to work at all?"
"Not for the last few weeks; no one is looking for another set of hands at the moment."
"I understand."
"Did you have work today?" he asked.
"A house clearing. A local realtor was having a hard time getting one of his homes to sell."
"Too much?"
Lottatna shook her head. "Saturated in abuse energy."
"There seems to be a lot of that around here," he said softly.
"Is there not much of it where you"re from?"
"We don"t have any. We respect our neighbors and families."
"Sounds like a wonderful place."
He shrugged.
"Have you thought about going back?"
"There is no going back. Not for me."
"Not enough funds?"
Resetarits shook his head. "I… changed someone."
"In a good way or a bad way?"
"It"s all the same in my people"s eyes."
Lottatna furrowed her brow. "But change brings progress. Change allows us to become better individuals. Even the house clearing I did today was a form of change—a change for the better."
He lowered his head until the waitress returned with their food.
"Thank you," he told the waitress, setting his hands in his lap until she left again. His hands came back up and they started to eat.
"I didn"t mean to offend you, Resetarits," Lottatna said after a while.
"No offense taken, Lottatna. Your people just view change in a way my people do not."
She nodded. "Are there any healers among your people?"
"No. There is no need for them."
"Disease free?"
He gave a slight nod.
"Are there things you like to do, Resetarits?"
"Read, Dream."
"Dream? About what?" she asked.
His eyes met hers. "It doesn"t matter. It won"t happen."
"Then what makes you happy?"
"Being able to spend this time with you."
"Are you just saying that, or do you mean that?"
"I mean everything I say, Lottatna. It"s disrespectful to lie."
"Sorry. I had to ask because you say you"re happy, but all I"ve seemed to do is make you more depressed."
"Not depressed. Thoughtful. I rarely get the opportunity to talk to someone like this. To hear their opinions and feel their… desire… to know me as a person."
"It was because I could feel yours that I asked you out tonight."
He covered his mouth and turned away.
"Resetarits?" Lottatna asked.
"You can feel me?"
"I can feel everyone I speak to. It"s how their energy responds when I"m around that allows me to know if I"m wasting my time or not."
"But you said it was my desire that prompted you to ask me out."
"The sincerity of your words, the open/relaxed flow of your aura while we talked. That is what I feel. But now I feel I"m pushing you away the longer we talk because your field has been pulling tighter and tighter since I arrived."
Resetarits sighed and tipped his head back. "The tightening isn"t because of our conversation, but our location and my fear of being touched. It"s my touch that changes people and with so many around, I hardly dare move."
"Any touch? Or just skin to skin contact?"
"Any touch. Fortunately, nothing changes if another touches something I"ve touched. But any physical connection with me and they change."
"Change how?"
"They become something they weren"t meant to be," he said softly.
Lottatna leaned forward slightly. "Would you prefer we get to go boxes and go back to our apartment complex?"
"No," he said quickly. "That is…"
"Too many people around?"
"Yes. I don"t dare leave until there are less people here."
"If you"re that worried about touch, why did you ask I meet you here?"
"Because it"s usually not this crowded on a Wednesday night."
"Save tonight, because it"s the High School"s Graduation Bonfire."
His eyes widened and he looked around the restaurant. "This is not good. This is so not good."