"No, it isn"t." At the moment he wasn"t thinking at all. His brain had gone numb. "All those years you
tried to have kids and you turn up pregnant now. I don"t get it." She glanced at the floor again. "Neither doI ." Bobby went to the fridge and grabbeda water , needing to douse his anxiety, to give himself a minute to think. To breathe. To accept what was happening. If only hewere Cameron, if only he could turn away and say that he couldn"t handle being a father, that he wasn"t ready for this.
"I don"t know what to do, Julianne."
"You don"t have to do anything. I can raise this baby by myself."
He studied the stubborn rise of her chin, the body language that told him she intended to protect her
child. To nourish it. To love it.
With or without him.
For a second he thought about Michael"s mother. She"d been dying of cancer when he"d met her, but
she"d done her best to raise her son, to love him, to protect him. To do all of the things Julianne would most likely do.
But Michael"s mother had suffered financially and her son had run wild.
Maybe he could offer Julianne a settlement, enough to give her and the baby a good, safe life.
That wouldn"t be the same as walking out on his kid, would it?
Bobby gulped his water. Of course it would. The child would know his money, but it wouldn"t know him. He wouldn"t be a father, not in the true sense of the word.
He looked at Julianne, wondering about her. Where she worked, if she was content with the direction of her life. "What do you do?" he asked, realizing they"d never discussed her career. "What"s your profession?"
"I"m a retail manager. And I just landed a new job. I"m supposed to start in two weeks."
"What kind of retail?"
"Women"s fashion." She lifted her chin again. "The pay is the same as my last job, but the benefits are
better."
He suspected she referred to medical benefits, the insurance that would provide the health care she
would most certainly need. "Why did you switch jobs?" he asked cautiously. "Was it because of the baby?" "No. The last store I worked at closed. I was in transition when I came here last month." And she was in transition again, he thought. Unmarried and pregnant. He leaned against his desk. Suddenly he wanted to hold her, to make everything all right. To tell her she wasn"t alone in this. But instead he remained right where he was, guarding his emotions, his reluctance to do the right thing. "How long will you be inTexas?" "Three days. I"m going to get a room at the motel in town." "You can stay here. And I don"t expect you to pay the bill," he added, knowing she"d chosen the motel in town because it was considerably cheaper than the ranch. "After all, we need some time to discuss our situation. To figure it out."
"Thank you," she said before they both fell silent.
She glanced out the window and he realized that talking about their situation wasn"t going to be easy.
He"d never expected to see Julianne again, yet here she was, reminding him of the night they"d made fast, reckless love.
The night using protection hadn"t even crossed his mind. When the phone rang he leaped for it, grateful
for the interruption.
Michael"s voice came on the line. "Hey, I"m sorry I flaked on our meeting. I sort of forgot about it. But I can swing by the barn now if you want."
"No, that"s okay. I"ve got some other business to tend to." He glanced at Julianne, wondered if she was
hungry, if she needed to fill her belly. "I"ll hook up with you later."
Bobby ended the call and watched Julianne sip her water. He didn"t know a d.a.m.n thing about expectant mothers, but he"d heard they were supposed to glow.
Well, she wasn"t glowing. The woman he"d impregnated looked downright ill.
"Come on," he said. "I"ll drive you to the lodge and Maria can check you into a room."
"Okay."
She gave him a halfhearted smile and guilt clawed its way to his chest. He"d been taught that a man
should marry a woman if he got her in trouble. Of course,Camhadn"t followed that rule, and Bobby wouldn"t, either.
He couldn"t bear to take a wife. Not ever again.
Julianne stood beside Bobby at the reception desk at the lodge, fighting a bout of nausea. She had soda crackers in her purse, but she didn"t want to attract attention to herself by eating in front of everyone. So she remained quiet and still, praying the queasiness would pa.s.s.
"Check again," Bobby told Maria.
TheLatinawoman tapped on a computerkeyboard, then shook her head. "There is still nothing available
until next week,Senor Bobby.Nada ." He cursed beneath his breath and Julianne realized what was happening. The ranch was booked. "I can get a room in town," she said. He turned to look at her, his gaze settling on her still-flat stomach. "No way. That motel is a dive. I"ll figure something else out."
They stood there for a moment, Bobby frowning and Julianne considering the crackers in her purse, wishing the queasiness would settle.
In the years she"d been desperate to have a baby, she used to imagine pregnancy being magical and
romantic. And she"d a.s.sumed morning sickness was contained to mornings.
"You can stay at my place," Bobby said.
Stunned, Julianne blinked. Maria seemed surprised, too. She fussed behind the counter, but it seemed
obvious, at least to Julianne, that the receptionist was eavesdropping.
"Thank you. That"s a very generous offer." And it made her wonder why he was willing to share his
home with her. He seemed so guarded, so distant, yet his offer spoke otherwise.
She glanced at the bracelet he"d given her, at the shiny gold memory.
Suddenly her stomach felt better. Calmer. She longed to be near him, to know more about him.
She hadn"t forgotten Bobby and he"d become even more important now.
Because his child grew in her womb.
A child she"d already begun to love.
"I promise not to be a burden," she said.
He shrugged. "Don"t worry about it. I"ll bunk with Michael while you"re here. He"s got plenty of s.p.a.ce."
Julianne flinched, instantly trapped in a myriad of emotions disappointment, confusion,self
-admonishment. Bobby shouldn"t matter as much as he did. Images of him shouldn"t be keeping her up at night. She shouldn"t care if he chose to stay with his nephew instead of with her.
Yet she did.
"Where"s your bag?" he asked, steering her away from the reception desk.
"In my rental car." Her nausea returned and she gave in and reached for the crackers.
Bobby watched her for a second. "If you"re hungry, I can fix something for you at my place."
"Crackers settle my stomach," she admitted, doing her best to steel her nerves, to pretend she was
stronger than she felt. "Most of the time, anyway."
He shifted uncomfortably. "Then I"ll have room service send some saltines to my house."
"Thank you."
He moved closer, close enough for her to smell his cologne, the warm, woodsy fragrance she recalled
much too intimately.
"I"m sorry, Julianne."
"For what?" Making her pregnant? Not using a, condom?
"I"m just sorry you don"t feel well."
Shesighed, grateful he was referring to her morning sickness. She didn"t want to discuss the night she"d
conceived. Not now, not while she was feeling emotional about him. "It comes with the territory. But I"ve
been told it will pa.s.s." "I"ve heard that, too." He started toward the door, paused to wait for her. "You"ll have to follow me to my cabin. It"s a little off the beaten path."
"That"s all right."
She got behind the wheel of her rented sedan and he climbed into his truck.