Chikyuu Tenseisha no Koroshikata

2016/07/20larvyde

“Is this it?”

I went to the church dedicated to Euva based on Ruby’s map. It was located right in the middle of a tavern street.

The actual church also looked like a bar in the outskirts of town.

Is this really a church?
Well, Ruby wouldn’t lie to me —

For now, I should open the door and try going in.

“Well, it really is a bar …”

Shelves stocked with bottles and a long counter.
It was totally a bar. Can’t be anything but a bar.

Then there was a woman behind the counter.

“Hm …? Who are you, never seen you around?”

The dark-brown skinned woman glared at me with narrowed eyes.

She had a white shirt and a waistcoat on … must be a bartender.

Well, I totally made a mistake.

I sighed and said.

“… I think I mistook the place. Say, is this a church?”

“Church? Of course it’s a church. What else d’you think it look like?”

“Maybe a bar, or a bar. Also, could be a bar …”

“Anyway, as you can see, I’m your humble priestess round these parts”

“No, well, you totally look like a bartender, and priests don’t call themselves humble, or do they?”

“Well anyways, sit down customer. Came right when I got nuthin to do, you did, I’ll have a round with you”

“Priests don’t call their believers customer do they …”

There’ll be no end to it if I retorted each and every time so I meekly sat down on the seat.

With a full mug in one hand, I sat face to face with the woman behind the counter.

“The name’s Rania. Been a priestess in this town for a long time now. Well, nowadays some cheap pub’s been taking our believers away, and I don’t get much chance to pray, too”

“Churches don’t normally compete for customers with pubs, right …”

“The believers don’t come anymore, friends gone off and gotten married, and I’m left all alone out here. Sheesh, I’m lonely here, y’know”

Rania gulped down her drink.
There was a line of booze leaking out from her lips … so s.e.xy.

“… well, yeah, it does get lonely when your friends are all married”

I don’t get where she’s going with this but I decided to chat with her.

“Oh, you understand? Seriously, right? … then when I went to the wedding they noticed and threw the bouquet at me. Get this, the bouquet flew. Right. At. Me. Told ’em to stop but what’s with that control. I was gonna be miserable but ended up catching it anyway”

“… so you caught it”

No, but, I came to church to level up, so why am I chatting with a woman over a drink.

“See, it’s not like I’m unpopular you know. But you see, whenever I told the guy that I’m doing a priest job they turn tail and run. Scared they’re going to desecrate the priesthood. I told them, it’s fine already, c’mon, grow some b.a.l.l.s and cross the holy threshold. I’m hitting thirty and still all alone just cuz you chickens don’t have the guts to rush in”

“… o, oh”

“It’s like that, y’know, life goes on and lotta things happen — have a drink and spit out what’s stuffing your chest. I’ll lend you an ear”

glance, Rania gave me a glance.

I see I see, so that’s why she told me her life story all of a sudden.

If she told me her story first then it would make the mood easier for me to tell her mine.

That kind of concern just barely made her seem like a priestess. Barely.

But then again—

“Sorry to say this when you’re being so considerate … the reason I came here today’s not to make a confession but to level up”

“Hm? What, that so? Then why dintcha mention it earlier? Your face looked tired so I thought, whoa, a depressed boy, gotta be considerate”

“Well, I am worn-out though”

I did something very tiring right before I came here.
Ruby was really good today ….

“Then write down your exploits here. If you have ’em”

Rania handed me a pen and paper.

I was to write down what my exploits have been until now to report it to the G.o.ddess Euva.

But my exploits, huh ….
I don’t think I had any worth called that¹.
¹ «TN: Bukou usually refers to exploits in battle»

I don’t have a battle-type cheat and always did underhanded things.

Well, there’s no use trying to smooth things over so I wrote them down as-is.

[Stole the reincarnator Yuutarou’s harem member Ruby and had wanton s.e.x. Meanwhile also had s.e.x with fellow traveler Liu. Incidentally, no intent to go steady with either. Planning to treat them as s.e.x friends]

Rania saw the paper I wrote my exploits on and her face cramped.

“… y’know, even though Lady Euva’s that kind of G.o.ddess there’s no way she’s gonna get these sorts of exploits appro… — WHOAH SHE TOTALLY APPROVED!?”

The moment Rania lit the paper up, golden particles danced around it.

The golden particles revolved around my head.

Even though I wasn’t a priest, I knew the G.o.ddess was happy.

I vaguely sensed the image of the G.o.ddess raising her thumb at me saying “Good job, you, really good job”

… I knew I was doing the right thing.
Looks like G.o.ddess Euva wants a sleazebag like me to hara.s.s and torment orthodox protagonists.

“…. oooh”

I felt my body br.i.m.m.i.n.g with energy.
I could clearly feel my status rising. If that’s the case —

“… you, what are you?”

“The name’s Motoki, your humble reincarnator”

“Reincarnator? Reincarnators are those, right? You don’t have any family or annoying relatives this side? Aren’t you guys the best with no fetters at all!”

Rania vigorously grabbed my shoulders.

“You, won’t you stop playing with fire and settle down with me? Let’s at least make a fait accompli with me tonight?”

Rania unb.u.t.toned her shirt and her valley peeked out.

Seeing the sweat-soaked, deep, dark skinned valley … I gulped.

“Well … let’s do that later”

Since I’m not the type to turn down a woman’s advances I’d probably do Rania at some point, but today I had to hold back.

Today, there was something I had to try.

That night, I once again went with Liu to the cemetery and dug up a rotten corpse.

Then —

“Right … !”

I finally gained a new power.

To look at an old, rotten corpse and reproduce its living form.

“With this …”

Miria was as good as captured.

I gulped, imagining Miria with disheveled golden hair raising her voice.