He straightened. "It is about work andbelieve me, you don"t want to know anything else."
"No! I want to know the truth. What"s going on here?" She wanted to ask if this had something to do with their s.e.xual encounters, but she didn"t have the courage. She didn"t want to know that Mark had changed his mind about wanting her in his bed.
He studied her for a long time. Pain filled his green eyes, but she had a bad feeling it wasn"t about his twisted ankle.
"You"re wrong about me," he said after a couple of minutes of silence. "This is completely work related. Our personal relationship complicates things for me."
"What on earth could I have to do with your work?"
"We"re involved, Darcy. I sure can"t define our relationship, but we have one. The thing is I don"t know if I can trust you. I know you"re keeping secrets you"re hiding something about your past and you won"t say why you moved toWhitehorn . There"s a wad of cash in your living room and the sheriff has had an anonymous tip that someone is using the Hip Hop to launder money."
Chapter Ten.
Darcy stared at Mark for so long, he wondered if she"d heard him. Nothing about her expression changed. Then she turned and hurried toward the front door.
"Darcy?" he called.
She didn"t bother looking back.
Mark leaned against the sofa and closed his eyes. No doubt he would get an award for jerk of the week, if there was such an honor. Could he have handled that worse than he did? He knew better than to simply blurt out that sort of information. Plus, something in his gut, something that had been there all along, told him she was innocent.
He should go after her, he thought,then realized he couldn"t. Not only did his ankle ache, his crutches were on the far side of the room well out of reach.
There was always crawling. Didn"two - men like that?
A cold draft blew across his cheek. He opened his eyes and saw that Darcy had left his front door open. The good news was,she was likely to return shortly.Or maybe not. Maybe her real plan was for him to freeze to death.
Apparently not, he thought less than two minutes later when she returned, slamming the door behind her. Fire blazed in her eyes as she thrust a bowl of leftover spaghetti at him. She fished the bottle of pain-killers he"d been given at the hospital out of her jeans front pocket and tossed the container onto his lap. Then she disappeared into the kitchen only to return with a gla.s.s of water.
"This is so much more than you deserve," she told him, shaking with emotion. "I can"t believe what you"ve thought of me."
"Darcy, you do have a secret life. You won"t talk about your past in any reasonable way,then you disappeared for an entire day."
"So the obvious explanation is that I"m a criminal? Is that it? I don"t spill my guts about every aspect of my life, so what? I launder money? Or maybe it"s bigger than that. Have you thought of having my baked goods tested? Isn"t it possible that I"m secretly distributing drugs to all my clients? How clever.Illegal substances in the pumpkin bread. I"m making gingerbread houses right now. Imagine what I could fill them with."
"Darcy-"
She planted her hands on her hips. "Shut up and eat. You have to take a pill and you can"t do that on an empty stomach."
"I"m sorry."
Her gaze narrowed. "Eat."
He took a bite of the spaghetti. Even a couple of days old, it was better than anything he"d had all week. He swallowed.
She nodded, as if satisfied he was going to follow instructions,then she headed for the door. "Don"t forget your pills," she called over her shoulder and disappeared. The door slammed shut behind her.
Mark forced himself to eat a couple more forkfuls before popping a painkiller. Then he set the food on the coffee table and muttered several curses.
He"d blown it. There wasn"t a doubt in his mind that he"d destroyed whatever fragile bond had been established between himself and Darcy. He"d acted like a jerk. He"d hurt her feelings and he didn"t have anyone to blame but himself.All because of Sylvia.
He pictured his ex-fiancee. While Darcy was all soft curves andMidwestdown-to- earth beauty, Sylvia had been slick, chic and very much in control. Looking back, he wondered what had affected him so. Had it been some kind of chemistry? Had he been so ready to fall for someone?Or had it been her supposed interest in him. She"d smiled as if she"d been waiting for him all her life, and had hung on every word. He hated to think he"d fallen for a great acting job, but he had a bad feeling that"s what it all had been.
None of which was Darcy"s fault. So why was he taking it out on her? Why was he making her pay for Sylvia"s sins? He and Darcy weren"t in love. They were friends who happened to be lovers. If anything he should be grateful. She"d reminded him that he was still alive and capable of s.e.xual feeling. Being with her was better than being with anyone even Sylvia. He"d- The front door opened. Darcy stormed in, her arms holding a large brown paper bag. She kicked the door shut behind her and stalked to the coffee table where she shoved aside his half-eaten dinner.
Color stained her cheeks. Her curls were wild and there was still pain lurking in her eyes.
"I don"t owe you this," she told him. "You"ve been stupid and insensitive from the start. If you had questions, you should have come to me with them.But no. You had to go your own macho way, a.s.suming the worst. What did I ever do to you to make you think I"m a horrible person? I"m so angry, Mark. I trusted you with my friendship and with my body. You betrayed me."
"I"m sorry."
"Sorry doesn"t cut it. Sorry is a weasel word. I wish there was a sword in here. I"d make you fall on it."
He was grateful she didn"t mention his service revolver. "Darcy, if I don"t tell you I"m sorry, what do youwant me to say?"
"Nothing.I want you to listen."
She began emptying the paper bag. First she pulled out the music box, followed by a ledger and a folder. She handed him the music box.
"Count it," she said.
"Darcy..."
Her eyes turned to slits. "Count it."
He did as she requested. The bills were mostly fifties, with a few twenties and a one-hundred-dollar bill. "Three thousand one hundred and twenty dollars," he said.
She shoved the ledger at him."If you remember, oh great detective. I have a side business. I sell baked goods."
A bad feeling swelled in the pit of his stomach. d.a.m.n. "But you"re not up and running yet. You said you didn"t have a contract with the Hip Hop."
"They"re not the only place in town. I"ve catered several kids" parties, a volunteer luncheon and Ernie buys cookies from me to sell at his gas station." She leaned over the coffee table and flipped open the ledger. "This is my receivables list. An accounting of all the invoices I"ve issued and in this column is a list of the money I"ve received. Nearly everyone is paying me in cash, which I"ve noted here."
He followed the columns down to the bottom, where she"d totaled her invoices for the month of August. He turned to the next page and found listings for the next month, all the way through November.
She slapped the folder on top of the ledger. "These are my receipts for expenses. It just so happens that I total them for each month. If you subtract the expenses from the invoices, you"ll find that in the past three months, my profits have been darned close to three thousand dollars."
The sinking feeling got worse. "Why didn"t you put the money in the bank?"
"My paycheck gets automatically deposited. With the baking, if I get paid in cash, I keep it cash and use the money for my expenses. And in case you want to accuse me of trying to avoid taxes, I can go get my quarterly returns."
He closed the folder and the ledger, then handed both to her. Darcy knelt on the far side of the coffee table, looking at him as if he were something disgusting she"d found on the side of the road.
"I can"t believe you thought I was laundering money," she told him. "For one thing, if I was a criminal, don"t you think I"d drive a better car? And why on earth would someone engage in that kind of criminal activity inWhitehorn ? Everyone knows everyone else"s business. It would be really hard to keep quiet. Plus, I"ve never been that stupid, or done anything illegal. And how could you make love with me all the while thinking I was a criminal?"
He leaned toward her, but she slid out of reach.
"I"ve only known about the money laundering for a couple of weeks."
"Which is why you"ve been avoiding me." The pain in her eyes deepened. "I didn"t expect you to be the love of my life, Mark, but I did expect you to treat me like a friend. You couldn"t even do that."
He wanted to tell her that he hadn"t thought she"d been the one laundering money, but he couldn"t lie. She"d been the first person he"d thought of and he"d obsessed about the possibility ever since Rafe had come to see him. Why had he been so quick to judgeher. And then he remembered. Sylvia.
Darcy pulled something else out of her bag. It was a large photo alb.u.m old, worn and thick with pictures.
"About my secret life," she said slowly. "You"re right. I have one. There"s a really big thing I didn"t tell you." She drew in a deep breath. "The thing is I didn"t want to lose you. I knew that when you found out, you"d turn away and disappear just like every other guy has done. So I kept my secret."
Every muscle in his body stiffened. "You"re married."
"What?" She stared at him as if he was crazy. "Married? I haven"t even been on a date in five years. I"m not married."
Relief filled him. He figured he could handle about anything else. "Then what"s the deep, dark secret?"
She shifted into a sitting position. "You interrupted my speech. I had some seriously righteous indignation going and now I forget where I was."
"You were saying that I would disappear when I found out the truth."
She paused,then nodded. "Well, now I want you gone so I"m going to tell you."
Her matter-of-fact words cut through him. While he hadn"t expected his relationship with Darcy to lead anywhere, he didn"t want it to end like this. "Okay. I"m a captive audience."
He reached for the photo alb.u.m, but she put her hand on it to stop him. "You have to listen first. I told you that my parents died about five years ago, right?"
He nodded.
"I was telling the truth when I said they left me almost nothing. By the time the bills were paid, I had a little money, but not much. What I didn"t tell you is that I have a brother."
Mark stared at her. "Why would you keep that a secret?"
"Because Dirk isn"t like other kids.He"s funny and handsome and I love him more than anyone in the world. He"s also developmentally disabled. His problems put a big strain on my parents" marriage. I didn"t get what the big deal was, but back then I rarely thought of anyone but myself. Dirk and I were buddies and I adored him. When my parents died, I knew I had to be responsible for both of us. Like I said, after the estate was settled, we didn"t have much, but it was a small nest egg.Enough to get us through until I finished college and got a decent job."
Obviously that hadn"t happened, Mark thought, stunned by what Darcy had said. Questions filled his mind, but he held them in, wanting her to tell the story in her own way.
"Everything was going fine," she said, staring at the alb.u.m rather than him. "Then one of Dirk"s teachers decided I was too much of a flake to be responsible for someone with Dirk"s special needs. He reported me to social services, they tried to take him away from me and we ended up in court. It took every penny left, but I managed to gain custody of my brother. That"s when we left. I didn"t want to stay inChicagoanymore."
She rose to her feet, then paced to the window and stared out. Snow had started to fall. "I pickedArizonabecause there was a really good day school there for him. I managed to support us working two or three jobs. Dirk grew, but as he became a teenager things changed. He needed more."
"TheMadisonSchool," Mark muttered. "That"s why you moved here."
"Exactly.They have an amazing residential program. My brother is going to have wonderful opportunities to learn to function in the world. They expect him to be fairly self-sufficient in time. I just want him to be happy. One of the counselors there told me that we"re in line for some financial aid, which is really good, because I"m hanging on by a thread. Every penny I make goes to my brother. I live as cheaply as I can. My car"s old, my clothes arepathetic, I don"t have a social life. And you know what? I don"t give a d.a.m.n, because I love my brother and I would do anything for him."
She turned to face him. The rage had returned. "I work a fifty-hour week on my feet and I have a side business that just may turn out to be successful. So you have no right to judge me or accuse me of anything. I"ve done all this without one sc.r.a.p of help and frankly I think I"ve done a h.e.l.l of a job."
She took a step toward him and planted her hands on her hips. "I thought you were pretty special. I actually liked you. Now I think you"re sc.u.m and I"m sorry I ever slept with you. Go to h.e.l.l, Mark Kincaid."
She headed for the door and jerked it open. Then she aimed her parting shot. "By the way, I"m not pregnant. Not that you bothered to ask."
She disappeared into the afternoon, slamming the door behind her.
Mark stared at the place where she"d stood and wished he could have a do-over. He"d blown this one from the beginning. The pain inside of him had nothing to do with his ankle or the bruise on his face. It came from having hurt someone who didn"t deserve anything but the best that life had to offer.
When had he gotten so stupid?
Knowing it wasn"t going to help but unable to stophimself , be reached for the alb.u.m and put it on his lap. He turned the pages slowly and watched as Darcy"s life unfolded before his eyes.
She"d been a chubby-cheeked little girl with blond curls and a perfect smile that made him ache. He saw pictures of her on a pony at a birthday party and in fancy dresses at the holidays. The background of the photos showed a large, elegant house with expensive furnishings. He saw her with friends, becoming school-age.
She was an awkward preadolescent when her brother arrived. There was a picture with her and a smiling baby. He flipped through photos of the two of them. Her parents" smiles became more strained, but Darcy"s affection for Dirk was evident. He turned more pages and saw dance pictures, then prom photos.A beautiful Darcy with a handsome teenage boy. High school graduation followed, then pictures of just Dirk. He noticed there were far fewer of them than there had been of Darcy.
The last few pages showed a growing Dirk in a small apartment. The elegant furnishings were gone, as was the big house. Snapshots of Darcy showed her looking tired and thin. But the love between the siblings still shone out from every frame. He closed the book and set it back on the coffee table.
Darcy wasn"t anything like Sylvia. He couldn"t have been more wrong about her.
And now she was gone.
He tried to tell himself that this was better. He didn"t want her in his life he didn"t want anyone. Her whole idea of being friends had been doomed from the start. He owed her an apology, of course, but after that it would be best if they simply returned to being neighbors who nodded when they saw each other. She wouldn"t take too long to get over him. Being angry would help. As for him, he didn"t have to recover he"d never been involved.
It was odd, though, how the ache in his ankle was nothing when compared to the dull throbbing in his heart.
Darcy ignored the pieces of gingerbread still waiting to be a.s.sembled in her kitchen. She walked through the living room, down the short hall and entered her bedroom, where she threw herself on the bed. She hugged a pillow to her chest and waited for the tears burning at the back of her eyes to spill over.
Anger and confusion wrestled in her chest, and so far there was no clear winner. She was so mad at Mark that she could spit. She wanted to scream at him, demanding that he tell her where he got the right to judge her for something she hadn"t even done. How dare he think she"d done something illegal? She hurt so much inside. He was gone from her life and somehow his leaving had left behind a really big hole.
She told herself she shouldn"t care anymore. Mark had proved to be nothing more than a case of bad judgment. She wanted to justify what he"d thought of her by telling herself it was because he was a detective; thinking the worst of people was his job. But somehow she didn"t buy into the explanation. He hadn"t thought the worst of anyone else just her.
She rolled onto her side, pulling the pillow with her. Despite how horrible she felt, there weren"t any tears. They would probably come later, when she was ready to heal. But for now there was just the emptiness and the knowledge that she"d been foolish enough to allow herself to dream.
Darcy stood up. She tossed the pillow onto the bed and drew in a deep breath. If there was one thing the past five years had taught her, it was to keep moving forward, regardless of how daunting the circ.u.mstances. She had orders to fill and a life to live. If Mark Kincaid wanted to be an a.s.s, that was his business, not hers.
Four hours later she"d finished a.s.sembling the two gingerbread houses. The three she"d already completed had been loaded into boxes that she"d carefully carried to her car, along with seven dozen cookies. She began her deliveries around four, grateful that the snow had stopped.
Promptly at five she pulled into the parking lot of the Hip Hop Cafe. Melissa North, the owner of the cafe, was back from her vacation and had wanted to sample Darcy"s goods for the following week.
Darcy grabbed the cookies first, and headed for the front of the cafe. She knocked on the closed and locked door.
From where she stood she could see two people inside. Melissa stood talking to a man. Darcy squinted,then recognized Josh Anderson. They walked to the front door and Melissa turned the key in the lock.
"You"re right ontime ," Melissa said. The store owner was of medium height, with beautiful black hair and intense blue eyes. She smiled,then sniffed. "Something smells heavenly."