We"re on our way.
Straight to the top.
We"ll never give up.
We just won"t stop!
"Okay," Mrs. James reminded them after practice, "those of you who are here today know that it"s between you eight. We might have one or two more who just couldn"t come today. The next three practices are crucial. Please be here for all three; otherwise, I"m sure it will affect how you do on Friday. Any questions?"
Christy waited until the other girls had left before asking about Tuesday. "I need to take a makeup test in algebra tomorrow, and that"s the only time he"s giving it."
"It"s up to you," Mrs. James said. "These last three practices are the most critical. You"re doing well, Christy, but I think you need the practice. You"ll have to decide which is the most important to you."
"I could help you," Teri said. She had stood up to Renee last week, and now she was being nice to Christy again. It was wonderfully refreshing after the way the rest of her day had gone. "If you take the test and then come late to practice, I could stay after and show you what you missed during the first part."
"Are you sure?"
Teri nodded, her brown eyes showing her sincerity.
"Is that okay, Mrs. James?" Christy asked, still amazed at Teri"s generous offer.
"It"s up to you, girls. I"ll be here until four-thirty. After that, you"re on your own."
"Thanks, Teri," Christy said.
"Sure. See you tomorrow."
That night Christy spent at least two and a half hours on her algebra. She decided not to tell her parents about the F. Why get them all upset when the teacher would be recording the makeup grade?
She busied herself with her homework until ten o"clock, trying hard to concentrate. Wanting to get her homework done was only part of the reason for plunging in so diligently. The other reason attacked her as soon as she climbed into bed.
It was her thoughts. And her feelings, which she had so carefully guarded in her heart. Churning around like sneakers in a dryer, her thoughts and feelings now b.u.mped into each other in the darkness: Todd, Jasmine, Rick, Katie, Renee, and all the pressure she had put on herself to make the squad. All the issues in her life spun around in her subconscious through the night.
She didn"t pray. She hadn"t since Friday. She knew she would feel better if she did, but her stubbornness kept her from yielding. Instead she chose to stay motivated by anxiety and jealousy.
Katie noticed at lunch on Tuesday that Christy wasn"t wearing her Forever ID bracelet. Christy told Katie that she would keep it as a memory, but it didn"t really mean anything anymore.
"What are you saying?" Katie questioned. "That you"ve dismissed Todd from your life? I find that hard to believe. I thought you said once that he would be in your heart forever."
"Did I?"
"Yes, of course you did. You want to know what I think?"
"No." Christy bit into her peanut b.u.t.ter and honey sandwich, knowing that Katie would disregard her reply.
"I think you really, truly love Todd deep down, but you"re afraid to get hurt because your relationship is so up and down."
"No, Todd"s only a fantasy. I"ve wanted him to care as much about me as I care about him, but he"s always been off in his own dimension. We"re not good for each other. I"m too jealous."
Christy didn"t even realize she felt these things. It amazed her to hear what was coming out of her mouth. "Did I just say that?"
"What, that you"re jealous?"
"Yes."
"That"s what you said. But do you want to know what I think? I think jealousy is normal when you love someone, and it"s a good way to tell how much you care about him. The more jealous you get, the more you care."
Christy questioned whether that was true. After all, Katie had no experience in love. How would she know what"s normal? Plus, when Todd quoted those verses on love, he had said that love was not jealous. She remembered that part.
"I don"t know, Katie. All I know is that this Jasmine girl obviously means more to Todd than I do, and I must be pretty worthless if my compet.i.tion is a girl in a wheelchair."
"Oh, low, Christy, low!" Katie cringed. "I can"t believe you said that. I don"t think you"re looking at this the right way. I mean, even if Todd had asked you, do you honestly think your parents would have let you go?"
"I don"t know. Maybe. They treat him as if he"s a long-lost nephew or something."
"I don"t blame them! I"d treat Todd that way too. He seems like the perfect guy."
"Yeah, well maybe he"s a little too perfect-a little too spiritual. He"s always trying to see things from G.o.d"s point of view, and it"s too hard for me to catch up. I just don"t think the way Todd does or see things the way he does. Besides, weren"t you the one who was telling me only a few days ago to let Todd go and to move on since Rick wanted to go to the prom with me?"
Katie wadded up her lunch bag, aimed, and made the shot into the trash can. She shook her head, her straight red hair swinging like ta.s.sels.
"I don"t know what I said then. But if you want my opinion now, I think Todd"s worth trying to catch up to. I mean, wouldn"t you rather be with a guy who"s a few steps ahead of you emotionally or spiritually or whatever? Seems as though the few guys in my life have only been ahead of me physically, if you know what I mean."
Christy smiled and nodded. She knew exactly what Katie meant.
"You do know, don"t you," Katie leaned over and spoke in a hushed voice, "that a bunch of couples have rented hotel rooms at the Coronado for, you know, after the dance."
"Are you kidding? People from our school?" As soon as she said it, Christy realized she was being awfully naive. Of course, other students at her school were doing stuff like that. She just never thought of who was doing what. She tended to think all her friends were innocent in the same way she was-except Alissa. And she certainly hadn"t caught on until much later how intimately involved Alissa had been with her boyfriends.
"I heard that last year after the prom six of the guys on the football team and their dates were arrested for having a party in a hotel room. They were drunk and loud and smashed a bunch of furniture. The hotel security kicked them out."
"That"s disgusting," Christy said. "Why can"t it be a nice, sweet, innocent dance like, well, in the movies?"
"I know," Katie said as the bell signaled the end of lunch. "I really hope another couple goes with us because, to be honest, I don"t exactly know what Lance"s idea of a good time is."
Christy hurried to Spanish cla.s.s, but Katie"s final comment stayed with her. Would Lance really have a different idea from Katie"s of what prom night should be? He did lean toward the dramatic, as the limo already represented. And Christy had learned enough to know that just because a guy said he was a Christian didn"t mean he was operating out of the same value system that a deeply committed Christian would live by.
In a strange way, for the first time Christy felt relieved that she wasn"t going to the prom with Rick. Cheerleading tryouts presented enough pressure for one week, not to mention the algebra quiz.
The makeup quiz turned out to be harder than the first test. Christy handed it in and left cla.s.s with a terrible headache. The last thing she wanted was to face Renee and be behind the rest of the girls who were trying out. If it hadn"t been for Teri"s offer to stay after and help, Christy probably would have given up the whole dream then and there.
"What are you doing here?" Renee said through clenched teeth as Christy slid into place as a routine ended.
Teri turned to Renee. "You know what, Renee? The rest of us are getting sick of your comments. We"re supposed to be building a team here. If you"re so set on slamming somebody, why don"t you slam me for being Hispanic?"
"I would never do that, Teri!" Renee looked indignant. Her friends gathered around her, and Renee went on defending herself. "I"m not prejudiced against Mexicans or anybody!"
"Oh really? Then why are you against Christy just because she"s a soph.o.m.ore and the rest of us are juniors? It"s the same thing as slamming me because the color of my skin is different from yours. I can"t change my skin. Christy can"t change her age. You"re the only one who can change, Renee. You can change your att.i.tude."
Mrs. James stepped in and told the girls to sit down. They complied but s.p.a.ced themselves out and took turns glancing at Renee, who sat with her arms crossed in front of her.
"I should have said something earlier," Mrs. James said with a concerned look. "I don"t know what has gone on over the last few weeks of practice, but I can tell you what will go on during the next few days of practice and then once the team is formed. We will be a team: working together, looking out for each other, helping each other. Each of you will have equal value to me and to each other. Understand?"
The girls quietly nodded.
"There will be absolutely no more of these bad att.i.tudes or cruel remarks. I don"t know what all has been said, and I don"t want to know, but I think now is the time for apologies. If any of you need to apologize to anyone else here, I"ll wait and let you do that before we go into the next practice set."
No one moved. Christy searched her mind for something she could apologize for, but she saw herself as the victim who should be apologized to.
"Sorry," Teri said to the group. "I shouldn"t have blown up like that. I apologize if I came on too strong, Renee."
Renee neither acknowledged Teri"s apology nor offered hers to anyone.
"Okay," Mrs. James said, breaking the tension. "I can"t make you apologize, but I will form this group into a team. Let"s get going, and remember, I want you to work together on this."
They practiced the next routine for twenty minutes; then Mrs. James dismissed them. No one had much to say to anyone else. Christy stayed on the field with Teri, and they went right into the moves Christy had missed at the beginning of practice.
"Thanks for what you said, Teri. I really appreciate it."
Teri batted her long braid of dark hair off her shoulder and shook her head. "I didn"t say it very nicely."
"But you got the point across."
"Maybe. But if I didn"t do it with love, it counts for nothing."
Christy froze. She had heard that phrase before. From Todd? "Is that in the Bible?"
"Yes, in I Corinthians."
"The love chapter," Christy added excitedly. "My boy- I mean, this guy I know said it to me last week. He"s memorizing it. The whole chapter."
"Then he"s a Christian?" Teri asked.
"Slightly! I mean, yes. So am I! Are you?"
"Yes!" Teri said, nodding enthusiastically.
The two gave each other a hug as if they had just found out they were related. Then chattering quickly, Teri filled Christy in on the details of how she went to a church in which only Spanish was spoken and her dad was one of the pastors. With all the eager sharing between the two girls, they failed to get much practice in but decided to stay after on Wednesday and Thursday to help each other.
On her way home, Christy thought of how differently this day had ended than it had begun. She started by nearly losing Katie as her friend, and she ended with a new friend, Teri.
Wednesday and Thursday flew by, and Christy improved a lot as Teri coached her. But Christy realized that Teri was the better of the two of them. She had a certain grace and a vibrant smile that could be spotted halfway up the bleachers.
Christy"s plan to beat out all the other girls had fueled her with angry energy for more than a week now. But getting so close to Teri made it hard, because she wouldn"t want to make the team if Teri was the one who didn"t.
It wasn"t much of a prayer, but the only scrawny bit of communication Christy had with G.o.d on the day of tryouts was, Please let us both make it Together we could be a much better witness for You.
She added the last part, thinking G.o.d might be more apt to do what she wanted if there was something in it for Him. Even as she thought the scrawny prayer, she realized how far she"d come from her original plan of honoring G.o.d by being on the cheerleading squad and being recognized on her campus as a G.o.d-lover. Right now she wasn"t much of a vibrant testimony. She wasn"t much of a vibrant anything.
The only thing she was being recognized for on her campus was as the girl who turned down Rick Doyle. Or, more accurately, the girl who invited Rick to the prom and then turned around and canceled on him. It was awful to have so many people watching her and judging her by her actions.
Originally that was what she thought would be the advantage of holding a position as a cheerleader. Now she detested the way people she didn"t know came up to her and made strange comments about Rick. Many of them a.s.sumed she was a sn.o.b or at least extremely vengeful for what she had done to him. She didn"t like the spotlight at all and determined that when she did make cheerleading, she"d be a quiet witness-a very quiet witness. That way people wouldn"t expect so much from her.
The few times during the week that she had seen Rick, he had turned away or ignored her. She couldn"t stand this tension and wished he would say something and get it over with. Christy wanted to say something and break the ice, if only she had an idea of what to say. Lately, it seemed that everything she"d done or said had soured. She didn"t dare risk goofing things up with Rick even more than she had already.
Scholastically, Friday was a waste for Christy. She couldn"t sit still or pay attention in any of her cla.s.ses. She even moved her legs through the steps of her tryout routine under the desk in Spanish cla.s.s. She couldn"t eat a bite at lunch, so she searched the lunch area until she found Teri. Together they went to a quiet corner in the gym and went through the motions of their cheers, generously encouraging each other.
At last, three o"clock came. Christy was the first one in the gym and the first one to put on her tryout uniform. She stood in front of the locker room mirror to admire the way the blue and gold stripes made each swish, each move, look sharper and more defined.
The other seven contestants filtered in soon after. By 3:15, Christy felt a current of electrical excitement crackling through the room as the girls briskly cuffed their socks and adjusted the ribbons they had been instructed to wear in their hair.
"Here, Christy," Teri offered. "Try tucking your ribbon under your ponytail holder before tying it. Wait, I"ll do it for you. That way it won"t slip off while you"re doing your routine."
"My hair never stays back on the sides," Christy nervously complained as Teri calmly tied the royal blue ribbon.
"Use more spray." Teri"s own hair looked perfect, curled tightly on the ends and held securely with a gold ribbon. "Here. Close your eyes. I"ll do it."
Teri sprayed and tucked and fussed with Christy"s hair before announcing, "There. It looks perfect, and believe me, it"ll stay in place now."
Christy opened her eyes and saw how much better her hair looked after Teri"s loving touch. She also saw Renee. Renee"s dark hair was set off by both a gold and a blue ribbon.
"Why are you helping her?" Renee asked Teri.
Teri didn"t look up. She calmly tucked her brush and hair spray back into her bag. "You don"t want to know."
"What do you mean, I don"t want to know? I asked, didn"t I? Why are you helping her?"
Christy was amazed at Teri"s strength and confidence and the way she held her ground with Renee.
"I"ll tell you why, but you won"t want to hear it."
"Why?" Renee challenged, her hand on her hip.
"Because it"s the same reason I told you last year after tryouts when you asked if I was mad that you made it and I didn"t."
"Oh." Renee looked bothered. "You mean that stuff about being a church girl."
Christy watched the two girls" reflections in the mirror as they faced each other. Teri"s face looked soft and kind, while Renee"s looked hard and angry.
"It"s not that I"m a church girl, Renee. It"s that I love G.o.d. And His Word says that if I love Him, I"m supposed to love my neighbor as much as I love myself."