Annie watched him go. As she looked at his retreating back she thought, I am so not handling that.
Shed lied to Tyler. Having him hug her like that had brought all of the feelings she had for him rushing to the surface. She sighed. What was she going to do? She didnt know. But whatever she did, she couldnt let Tyler know that she still had it bad for him. He thought she was over it, and thats what counted. She was just going to have to suffer in silence.
The bus came and she got on. All the way home she replayed over and over again in her mind the way Tyler had held her hands. She closed her eyes and pictured his face. She knew it was exactly the wrong thing to do, but she couldnt help it. She leaned against the window and tried to will the image of his face out of her mind, but it wouldnt go away. I am the worst person in the entire known universe, she thought miserably.
CHAPTER 4.
Weve just pa.s.sed the seven-month point of our journey, Sophia said as she stood in front of the weekly Tuesday night Wicca study group. Five more to go.
And a day, Cooper reminded her.
And a day, repeated Sophia, nodding her head and laughing. We cant forget that. Now I think youll all agree that this time has gone by pretty quickly.
Cooper thought about that. True, it did seem like the dedication ceremony theyd done had been only a few weeks ago. But actually it had taken place back in April. Now, it was almost winter. During that time a lot had happened, both to her personally and to the group as a whole. Theyd all matured in their knowledge of magic and of witchcraft. Strong friendships had been formed. Cooper thought of Sophia, Archer, and the other teachers as her extended family. And Kate and Annie had become like sisters to her, largely because of what theyd gone through together. Most important, shed learned a lot about *
herself and her abilities.
As you know, Sophia continued, at the end of the year and a day many of you will be asked if you want to be initiated into Wicca as full-fledged witches.
Cooper felt a thrill of excitement go through her when she heard Sophias words. A full-fledged witch. It sounded to Cooper like some kind of baby bird that had finally gotten its wings and could fly on its own.
But she knew that undergoing formal initiation was a very serious step. It was a big commitment. It meant dedicating herself to Wicca for probably the rest of her life. Deciding whether or not she was ready for that was something she was going to have to do pretty soon. But did she know enough to make that decision?
As you all know by now, the form of witchcraft youve been learning here in cla.s.s is only one of the ways the Craft is practiced, Sophia told them. There are many other ways. Some of them are similar to ours with only a few differences. Others are very different. And witchcraft itself is part of the larger world of pagan religions, some of which are a lot like Wicca and a lot of which are completely unique. The members of my coven and of our sister coven, the Coven of the Green Wood, believe that its important for people to experience and understand as many different paths as possible before deciding on one. So, for the next month were going to ask each of you to spend time in another tradition.
Cooper looked at Annie and Kate. What was Sophia talking about?
Sophia held up a black velvet bag. In this bag are slips of paper, each one with the name of a different kind of faith written on it. Each of you will select a slip. You will spend the next month learning about the path you choose. We want you to find out as much as you can in that time. In particular, we would like you to see how the path you choose is similar to and different from the one youre on now.
What happens if we find out we like the new path better? asked a man sitting beside Cooper.
Sophia smiled slyly. Weve had that happen in the past, she said. And thats perfectly all right. The point of this exercise is to expand your knowledge of the different paths. You all came to this cla.s.s because you were interested in finding out what Wicca is all about. You found something you liked and you decided to study it some more. Its entirely possible that the same thing will happen to you again.
Dont be afraid of that. As weve discussed many, many times before in this group, there are many ways of exploring the world. This is just one of them.
Im not sure I like this idea, Kate whispered to Cooper and Annie. Im happy with what were doing.
I dont know, Annie said. It might be fun.
Who wants to choose first? Sophia asked.
I will, Cooper said, standing up.
She walked up to Sophia, who opened the bag. Cooper reached inside and picked a slip of paper.
Unfolding it, she read, Celtic shamanism.
She immediately felt afraid. Her mind raced back to Midsummer Eve, when she had entered a cave with the group of kids who had ended up chasing her through the woods. Theyd told her that the cave had been used by shamans who wanted to have visions. Their leader, Spider, had pretended to put her *
through some kind of vision-inducing ceremony. Only it had all been an elaborate trick to make her look foolish. Looking at the slip in her hand, she was reminded of the horror of that night all over again.
I dont know if I can do this, Cooper told Sophia. Can I pick another one?
If you really feel you cant do it, you can pick another one, Sophia answered. But as Cooper began to put the slip back into the bag, Sophia added, But remember that sometimes challenges come our way for a reason.
Cooper paused and looked at her. That was low, she said. Sophia knew very well that Cooper could seldom resist a challenge. Now she was making Cooper feel that if she returned the slip to the bag she would be admitting defeat. She withdrew her hand. Ill keep this one, she said.
Sophias eyes twinkled. Dont worry, she said. We have some great books that will help you out.
Cooper returned to her seat as Annie stood up and walked forward. When she removed her slip and read it a curious look came over her face. As-a . . . . As-a, she said. Ah-sa-true?
Its p.r.o.nounced ow-sah-tru, Sophia told her.
What is it? Annie asked, perplexed.
Its the Norse religion, Sophia told her.
Norse, Annie said. As in Freya and the gang?
Thats right, Sophia confirmed.
Great, Annie said, sounding as if her choice was anything but.
Cooper knew that her friend was thinking about her recent experience with aspecting the Norse G.o.ddess Freya. Freyas personality had mixed with Annies with some disturbing results. When Annie returned to where the girls were sitting, Cooper said, It looks like were both having reunions with the ones that gave us the most trouble.
I wonder where that leaves me? Kate said. I suppose I should find out.
She stood up and went to Sophia. As she reached into the velvet bag she felt a sense of apprehension.
What was she going to pick? Unlike Cooper and Annie, Kate hadnt had any negative experiences with any particular magical traditions, so she wasnt afraid of choosing any specific path. But she was also very aware that the exercise was meant to challenge them, and her experience with magical challenges was that they were sometimes very difficult.
Her fingers touched the slips of paper. She stirred them around, waiting to see if any of them called to her. Finally she just grabbed one and took it out. She unfolded it and looked at what was written there.
Santeria, she said.
A very interesting one, remarked Sophia.
Ive never heard of it, Kate said.
Dont worry, Sophia rea.s.sured her. Well point you in the right direction.
Kate went back to her friends. As the rest of the cla.s.s went up and selected their slips, they talked about their choices.
This sounded fun at first, Cooper said. Now Im not so sure.
I certainly didnt think Id be seeing Freya again this soon, remarked Annie.
I dont even know what mine is, Kate said. At least you guys have a clue.
I guess well all find out soon enough whats in store for us, Cooper told her friends. Whatever it is, its sure to be interesting.
Famous last words, Kate said.
For the rest of the cla.s.s they talked a little bit about the different traditions they had chosen. Sophia gave all the students books to get them started and let them spend some time reading. Kate, Cooper, and Annie sat together looking over the materials theyd been given and discussing what they found.
Sophia walked around the room, talking to each of the cla.s.s members. When she reached the three girls she sat on the couch they were gathered around. Hows it going? she asked.
This Asatru stuff is pretty grim, Annie said, shutting the book she was holding in her lap. Its all about honor and duty and being loyal to the clan.
It can be a little warriorlike, Sophia agreed. But try to see past that to what the people who practice Asatru find appealing about it. Thats really what this exercise is all about.
I think I might just like this shamanism stuff, Cooper told Sophia. Shed been reading a book about the various shamanistic practices.
Theres a really good exercise for doing a vision quest in that book, Sophia told her. Check that out.
Kate, how are you doing?
Im still confused, Kate admitted. Theres a lot of information here.
Let me see if I can help you out a little, said Sophia. What is it youre confused about?
I cant even really tell what Santeria is, said Kate unhappily.
That can be difficult to determine, Sophia told her. Basically, Santeria is a variation on the traditional African religion of Yoruba. The two share many similarities. But Santeria has been heavily influenced by Cuban culture and the practices of other Latin peoples.
Okay, Kate said. But whats all this about saints and spirits?
The Yoruba religion is based on the worship of certain spirits, called orishas, Sophia explained.
Santeria also focuses on these spirits.
But these pictures show Catholic saints, Kate said, showing Sophia a photograph of a Santeria shrine *
in the book. I recognize a lot of these from church.
Sophia nodded. Thats right, she said. You see, the Yoruban religion first made its way to America when African people were brought here as slaves. Their new masters didnt want them practicing their religions because they thought it gave them too much power. So the slaves masked their rituals and practices by a.s.signing the different orishas to corresponding saints.
So the slave owners thought they had given up their religion? Cooper said.
Right, said Sophia. She took the book from Kate and turned to a photo of a statue decorated with flowers and beads. For example, this is a statue of Saint Barbara. Only its not Saint Barbara whos being worshiped here. Its the Yoruban orisha Chango, the G.o.d of war and thunder.
This is all really confusing, Kate said. I dont know how Im going to figure it all out.
Youre in luck, Sophia told her. Theres a woman in town who is a Santera, a priestess of Santeria.
She also happens to be a friend of mine. She runs a botanica.
A what? asked Annie.
A botanica, Sophia explained. Its a shop where they sell items used in the practices of Santeria and Yoruba. They tend to be the focal points of the communities who practice these religions.
And this woman will talk to me? Kate asked.
Sophia nodded. She took a piece of paper and wrote on it. Heres the address. You can stop in to her shop when you get a chance.
Sophia moved on to the next group of students, leaving the girls alone. Kate looked at the paper Sophia had given her. Then she looked at Cooper and Annie. Im not sure I can go to this place, she said. It sounds a little weird.
Whats so weird about it? asked Annie.
Kate shrugged. I dont know, Kate said. All this stuff about the saints and these spirits, I guess.
Its no weirder than what we do here, probably, Cooper told her.
I know, admitted Kate. But Im used to this.
Cooper took the paper from Kate and looked at it. Botanica Yemaya, she read. I know where this is. Its over by one of the used CD places T.J. and I go to a lot. Tell you what. Well go with you. She looked at Annie. Okay?
Sure, Annie said. It will be like a field trip. Besides, I think it sounds really cool. Id love to see this botanica.
And this woman, Cooper added. Listen to her name"Evelyn LeJardin. I wonder what shes like.
All right, Kate said. Well all go. When?
How about tomorrow after school? Cooper suggested.
Thats fine with me, said Annie.
Kate? Cooper asked.
Yeah, replied Kate. That works for me.
I wish there was some kind of Asatru store or something I could go to, said Annie. It doesnt look like theres a lot of information about it.
Why not just call up your good friend Freya? suggested Cooper, grinning.
Very funny, Annie said. Keep that up and Ill aspect Thor and see what happens.
Hey there, someone said.