Cool and collected as he knew he was, he remained for a moment in hesitation. Then the sound of voices came to his ear from the garden room, the light frivolity of Susy"s laugh and Hooker"s huskier accents.
He had forgotten they were there--he had forgotten their existence!
Trusting still to his calmness, he called to Hooker in his usual voice. That gentleman appeared with a face which his attempts to make unconcerned and impa.s.sive had, however, only deepened into funereal gravity.
"I have something to attend to," said Clarence, with a faint smile, "and I must ask you and Susy to excuse me for a little while. She knows the house perfectly, and will call the servants from the annex to provide you both with refreshment until I join you a little later." Satisfied from Hooker"s manner that they knew nothing of his later interview with Pinckney, he turned away and ascended to his own room.
There he threw himself into an armchair by the dim light of a single candle as if to reflect. But he was conscious, even then, of his own calmness and want of excitement, and that no reflection was necessary.
What he had done and what he intended to do was quite clear, there was no alternative suggested or to be even sought after. He had that sense of relief which comes with the climax of all great struggles, even of defeat.
He had never known before how hopeless and continuous had been that struggle until now it was over. He had no fear of tomorrow, he would meet it as he had to-day, with the same singular consciousness of being equal to the occasion. There was even no necessity of preparation for it; his will, leaving his fortune to his wife,--which seemed a slight thing now in this greater separation,--was already in his safe in San Francisco, his pistols were in the next room. He was even slightly disturbed by his own insensibility, and pa.s.sed into his wife"s bedroom partly in the hope of disturbing his serenity by some memento of their past. There was no disorder of flight--everything was in its place, except the drawer of her desk, which was still open, as if she had taken something from it as an afterthought. There were letters and papers there, some of his own and some in Captain Pinckney"s handwriting. It did not occur to him to look at them--even to justify himself, or excuse her. He knew that his hatred of Captain Pinckney was not so much that he believed him her lover, as his sudden conviction that she was like him!
He was the male of her species--a being antagonistic to himself, whom he could fight, and crush, and revenge himself upon. But most of all he loathed his past, not on account of her, but of his own weakness that had made him her dupe and a misunderstood man to his friends. He had been derelict of duty in his unselfish devotion to her; he had stifled his ambition, and underrated his own possibilities. No wonder that others had accepted him at his own valuation. Clarence Brant was a modest man, but the egotism of modesty is more fatal than that of pretension, for it has the haunting consciousness of superior virtue.
He re-entered his own room and again threw himself into his chair. His calm was being succeeded by a physical weariness; he remembered he had not slept the night before, and he ought to take some rest to be fresh in the early morning. Yet he must also show himself before his self-invited guests,--Susy and her husband,--or their suspicions would be aroused. He would try to sleep for a little while in the chair before he went downstairs again. He closed his eyes oddly enough on a dim dreamy recollection of Susy in the old days, in the little madrono hollow where she had once given him a rendezvous. He forgot the maturer and critical uneasiness with which he had then received her coquettish and willful advances, which he now knew was the effect of the growing dominance of Mrs. Peyton over him, and remembered only her bright, youthful eyes, and the kisses he had pressed upon her soft fragrant cheek. The faintness he had felt when waiting in the old rose garden, a few hours ago, seemed to steal on him once more, and to lapse into a pleasant drowsiness. He even seemed again to inhale the perfume of the roses.
"Clarence!"
He started. He had been sleeping, but the voice sounded strangely real.
A light, girlish laugh followed. He sprang to his feet. It was Susy standing beside him--and Susy even as she looked in the old days!
For with a flash of her old audacity, aided by her familiar knowledge of the house and the bunch of household keys she had found, which dangled from her girdle, as in the old fashion, she had disinterred one of her old frocks from a closet, slipped it on, and unloosening her brown hair had let it fall in rippling waves down her back. It was Susy in her old girlishness, with the instinct of the grown actress in the arrangement of her short skirt over her pretty ankles and the half-conscious pose she had taken.
"Poor dear old Clarence," she said, with dancing eyes; "I might have won a dozen pairs of gloves from you while you slept there. But you"re tired, dear old boy, and you"ve had a hard time of it. No matter; you"ve shown yourself a man at last, and I"m proud of you."
Half ashamed of the pleasure he felt even in his embarra.s.sment, Clarence stammered, "But this change--this dress."
Susy clapped her hands like a child. "I knew it would surprise you! It"s an old frock I wore the year I went away with auntie. I knew where it was hidden, and fished it out again with these keys, Clarence; it seemed so like old times. Lord! when I was with the old servants again, and you didn"t come down, I just felt as if I"d never been away, and I just rampaged free. It seemed to me, don"t you know, not as if I"d just come, but as if I"d always been right here, and it was you who"d just come.
Don"t you understand! Just as you came when me and Mary Rogers were here; don"t you remember her, Clarence, and how she used to do "gooseberry" for us? Well, just like that. So I said to Jim, "I don"t know you any more--get!" and I just slipped on this frock and ordered Manuela around as I used to do--and she in fits of laughter; I reckon, Clarence, she hasn"t laughed as much since I left. And then I thought of you--perhaps worried and fl.u.s.tered as yet over things, and the change, and I just slipped into the kitchen and I told old fat Conchita to make some of these tortillas you know,--with sugar and cinnamon sprinkled on top,--and I tied on an ap.r.o.n and brought "em up to you on a tray with a gla.s.s of that old Catalan wine you used to like. Then I sorter felt frightened when I got here, and I didn"t hear any noise, and I put the tray down in the hall and peeped in and found you asleep. Sit still, I"ll fetch em."
She tripped out into the pa.s.sage, returning with the tray, which she put on the table beside Clarence, and then standing back a little and with her hands tucked soubrette fashion in the tiny pockets of her ap.r.o.n, gazed at him with a mischievous smile.
It was impossible not to smile back as he nibbled the crisp Mexican cake and drank the old mission wine. And Susy"s tongue trilled an accompaniment to his thanks.
"Lord! it seems so nice to be here--just you and me, Clarence--like in the old days--with n.o.body naggin" and swoopin" round after you. Don"t be greedy, Clarence, but give me a cake." She took one and finished the dregs of his gla.s.s.
Then sitting on the arm of his chair, she darted a violet ray of half reproach and half mischievousness into his amused and retrospective eyes. "There used to be room for two in that chair, Klarns."
The use of the old childish diminutive for his name seemed to him natural as her familiarity, and he moved a little sideways to make room for her with an instinct of pleasure, but the same sense of irresponsibility that had characterized his reflections. Nevertheless, he looked critically into the mischievous eyes, and said quietly,--
"Where is your husband?"
There was no trace of embarra.s.sment, apology, or even of consciousness in her pretty face as she replied, pa.s.sing her hand lightly through his hair,--
"Oh, Jim? I"ve packed him off!"
"Packed him off!" echoed Clarence, slightly astonished.
"Yes, to Fair Plains, full tilt after your wife"s buggy. You see, Clarence, after the old cat--that"s your wife, please--left, I wanted to make sure she had gone, and wasn"t hangin" round to lead you off again with your leg tied to her ap.r.o.n string like a chicken"s! No! I said to Jim, "Just you ride after her until you see she"s safe and sound in the down coach from Fair Plains without her knowin" it, and if she"s inclined to hang back or wobble any, you post back here and let me know!" I told him I would stay and look after you to see you didn"t bolt too!" She laughed, and then added, "But I didn"t think I should fall into the old ways so soon, and have such a nice time. Did you, Clarence?"
She looked so irresponsible, sitting there with her face near his, and so childishly, or perhaps thoughtlessly, happy, that he could only admire her levity, and even the slight shock that her flippant allusion to his wife had given him seemed to him only a weakness of his own.
After all, was not hers the true philosophy? Why should not these bright eyes see things more clearly than his own? Nevertheless, with his eyes still fixed upon them, he continued,--
"And Jim was willing to go?"
She stopped, with her fingers still lifting a lock of his hair. "Why, yes, you silly--why shouldn"t he? I"d like to see him refuse. Why, Lord!
Jim will do anything I ask him." She put down the lock of hair, and suddenly looking full into his eyes, said, "That"s just the difference between him and me, and you and--that woman!"
"Then you love him!"
"About as much as you love her," she said, with an unaffected laugh; "only he don"t wind me around his finger."
No doubt she was right for all her thoughtlessness, and yet he was going to fight about that woman to-morrow! No--he forgot; he was going to fight Captain Pinckney because he was like her!
Susy had put her finger on the crease between his brows which this supposition had made, and tried to rub it out.
"You know it as well as I do, Clarence," she said, with a pretty wrinkling of her own brows, which was her nearest approach to thoughtfulness. "You know you never really liked her, only you thought her ways were grander and more proper than mine, and you know you were always a little bit of a sn.o.b and a prig too--dear boy. And Mrs. Peyton was--bless my soul!--a Benham and a planter"s daughter, and I--I was only a picked-up orphan! That"s where Jim is better than you--now sit still, goosey!--even if I don"t like him as much. Oh, I know what you"re always thinking, you"re thinking we"re both exaggerated and theatrical, ain"t you? But don"t you think it"s a heap better to be exaggerated and theatrical about things that are just sentimental and romantic than to be so awfully possessed and overcome about things that are only real?
There, you needn"t stare at me so! It"s true. You"ve had your fill of grandeur and propriety, and--here you are. And," she added with a little chuckle, as she tucked up her feet and leaned a little closer to him, "here"s ME."
He did not speak, but his arm quite unconsciously pa.s.sed round her small waist.
"You see, Clarence," she went on with equal unconsciousness of the act, "you ought never to have let me go--never! You ought to have kept me here--or run away with me. And you oughtn"t to have tried to make me proper. And you oughtn"t to have driven me to flirt with that horrid Spaniard, and you oughtn"t to have been so horribly cold and severe when I did. And you oughtn"t to have made me take up with Jim, who was the only one who thought me his equal. I might have been very silly and capricious; I might have been very vain, but my vanity isn"t a bit worse than your pride; my love of praise and applause in the theatre isn"t a bit more horrid than your fears of what people might think of you or me.
That"s gospel truth, isn"t it, Clarence? Tell me! Don"t look that way and this--look at ME! I ain"t poisonous, Clarence. Why, one of your cheeks is redder than the other, Clarence; that"s the one that"s turned from me. Come," she went on, taking the lapels of his coat between her hands and half shaking him, half drawing him nearer her bright face.
"Tell me--isn"t it true?"
"I was thinking of you just now when I fell asleep, Susy," he said. He did not know why he said it; he had not intended to tell her, he had only meant to avoid a direct answer to her question; yet even now he went on. "And I thought of you when I was out there in the rose garden waiting to come in here."
"You did?" she said, drawing in her breath. A wave of delicate pink color came up to her very eyes, it seemed to him as quickly and as innocently as when she was a girl. "And what DID you think, Klarns," she half whispered--"tell me."
He did not speak, but answered her blue eyes and then her lips, as her arms slipped quite naturally around his neck.
The dawn was breaking as Clarence and Jim Hooker emerged together from the gate of the casa. Mr. Hooker looked sleepy. He had found, after his return from Fair Plains, that his host had an early engagement at Santa Inez, and he had insisted upon rising to see him off. It was with difficulty, indeed, that Clarence could prevent his accompanying him.
Clarence had not revealed to Susy the night before the real object of his journey, nor did Hooker evidently suspect it, yet when the former had mounted his horse, he hesitated for an instant, extending his hand.
"If I should happen to be detained," he began with a half smile.
But Jim was struggling with a yawn. "That"s all right--don"t mind us,"
he said, stretching his arms. Clarence"s hesitating hand dropped to his side, and with a light reckless laugh and a half sense of providential relief he galloped away.
What happened immediately thereafter during his solitary ride to Santa Inez, looking back upon it in after years, seemed but a confused recollection, more like a dream. The long stretches of vague distance, gradually opening clearer with the rising sun in an unclouded sky; the meeting with a few early or belated travelers and his unconscious avoidance of them, as if they might know of his object; the black shadows of foreshortened cattle rising before him on the plain and arousing the same uneasy sensation of their being waylaying men; the wondering recognition of houses and landmarks he had long been familiar with; his purposeless attempts to recall the circ.u.mstances in which he had known them--all these were like a dream. So, too, were the recollections of the night before, the episode with Susy, already mingled and blended with the memory of their previous past; his futile attempts to look forward to the future, always, however, abandoned with relief at the thought that the next few hours might make them unnecessary. So also was the sudden realization that Santa Inez was before him, when he had thought he was not yet halfway there, and as he dismounted before the Court House his singular feeling--followed, however, by no fear or distress--was that he had come so early to the rendezvous that he was not yet quite prepared for it.
This same sense of unreality pervaded his meeting with the deputy sheriff, at the news that the Federal judge had, as was expected, dismissed the prisoners on their own recognizances, and that Captain Pinckney was at the hotel at breakfast. In the like abstracted manner he replied to the one or two questions of the deputy, exhibited the pistols he had brought with him, and finally accompanied him to a little meadow hidden by trees, below the hotel, where the other princ.i.p.al and his seconds were awaiting them. And here he awoke--clear-eyed, keen, forceful, and intense!
So stimulated were his faculties that his sense of hearing in its acuteness took in every word of the conversation between the seconds, a few paces distant. He heard his adversary"s seconds say carelessly to the deputy sheriff, "I presume this is a case where there will be no apology or mediation," and the deputy"s reply, "I reckon my man means business, but he seems a little queer." He heard the other second laugh, and say lightly, "They"re apt to be so when it"s their first time out,"
followed by the more anxious aside of the other second as the deputy turned away,--"Yes, but by G-d I don"t like his looks!" His sense of sight was also so acute that having lost the choice of position, when the coin was tossed, and being turned with his face to the sun, even through the glare he saw, with unerring distinctness of outline, the black-coated figure of his opponent moved into range--saw the perfect outline of his features, and how the easy, supercilious smile, as he threw away his cigar, appeared to drop out of his face with a kind of vacant awe as he faced him. He felt his nerves become as steel as the counting began, and at the word "three," knew he had fired by the recoil of the pistol in his leveled hand, simultaneously with its utterance.
And at the same moment, still standing like a rock, he saw his adversary miserably collapse, his legs grotesquely curving inwards under him,--without even the dignity of death in his fall,--and so sink helplessly like a felled bull to the ground. Still erect, and lowering only the muzzle of his pistol, as a thin feather of smoke curled up its shining side, he saw the doctor and seconds run quickly to the heap, try to lift its limp impotence into shape, and let it drop again with the words, "Right through the forehead, by G-d!"
"You"ve done for him," said the deputy, turning to Clarence with a singular look of curiosity, "and I reckon you had better get out of this mighty quick. They didn"t expect it; they"re just ragin"; they may round on you--and"--he added, more slowly, "they seem to have just found out who you are."