And so very much did he exert himself on this occasion, and so patiently was his warmth received by my brother, that I began to suspect, that it was a contrivance to make me think myself obliged to him; and that this might perhaps be one end of the pressed-for interview.
The very suspicion of this low artifice, violent as I was thought to be before, put me still more out of patience; and my uncle and my brother again praising his wonderful generosity, and his n.o.ble return of good for evil, You are a happy man, Mr. Solmes, said I, that you can so easily confer obligations upon a whole family, except upon one ungrateful person of it, whom you seem to intend most to oblige; but who being made unhappy by your favour, desires not to owe to you any protection from the violence of a brother.
Then was I a rude, an ungrateful, and unworthy creature.
I own it all--all, all you can call me, or think me, Brother, do I own.
I own my unworthiness with regard to this gentleman. I take your word for his abundant merit, which I have neither leisure nor inclination to examine into--it may perhaps be as great as your own--but yet I cannot thank him for his great mediation: For who sees not, looking at my uncle, that this is giving himself a merit with every body at my expense?
Then turning to my brother, who seemed surprised into silence by my warmth, I must also acknowledge, Sir, the favour of your superabundant care for me. But I discharge you of it; at least, while I have the happiness of nearer and dearer relations. You have given me no reason to think better of your prudence, than of my own. I am independent of you, Sir, though I never desire to be so of my father: and although I wish for the good opinion of my uncles, it is all I wish for from them: and this, Sir, I repeat, to make you and my sister easy.
Instantly almost came in Betty, in a great hurry, looking at me as spitefully as if she were my sister: Sir, said she to my brother, my master desires to speak with you this moment at the door.
He went to that which led into my sister"s parlour; and this sentence I heard thundered from the mouth of one who had a right to all my reverence: Son James, let the rebel be this moment carried away to my brother"s--this very moment--she shall not stay one hour more under my roof!
I trembled; I was ready to sink. Yet, not knowing what I did, or said, I flew to the door, and would have opened it: but my brother pulled it to, and held it close by the key--O my Papa!--my dear Papa! said I, falling upon my knees, at the door--admit your child to your presence!--Let me but plead my cause at your feet!--Oh! reprobate not thus your distressed daughter!
My uncle put his handkerchief to his eyes. Mr. Solmes made a still more grievous face than he had before. But my brother"s marble heart was untouched.
I will not stir from my knees, continued I, without admission; at this door I beg it!--Oh! let it be the door of mercy! and open it to me, honoured Sir, I beseech you!--But this once, this once! although you were afterwards to shut it against me for ever!
The door was endeavoured to be opened on the inside, which made my brother let go the key on a sudden; and I pressing against it, (all the time remaining on my knees,) fell flat on my face into the other parlour; however without hurting myself. But every body was gone, except Betty, who I suppose was the person that endeavoured to open the door.
She helped to raise me up; and when I was on my feet, I looked round that apartment, and seeing n.o.body there, re-entered the other, leaning upon her; and then threw myself into the chair which I had sat in before; and my eyes overflowed, to my great relief: while my uncle Antony, my brother, and Mr. Solmes, left me, and went to my other relations.
What pa.s.sed among them, I know not: but my brother came in by the time I had tolerably recovered myself, with a settled and haughty gloom upon his brow--Your father and mother command you instantly to prepare for your uncle Antony"s. You need not be solicitous about what you shall take with you: you may give Betty your keys--Take them, Betty, if the perverse one has them about her, and carry them to her mother. She will take care to send every thing after you that you shall want--but another night you will not be permitted to stay in this house.
I don"t choose to give my keys to any body, except to my mother, and into her own hands.--You see how much I am disordered. It may cost me my life, to be hurried away so suddenly. I beg to be indulged till next Monday at least.
That will not be granted you. So prepare for this very very night.
And give up your keys. Give them to me, Miss. I"ll carry them to your mother.
Excuse me, Brother. Indeed I won"t.
Indeed you must. Have you any thing you are afraid should be seen by your mother?
Not if I be permitted to attend her.
I"ll make a report accordingly.
He went out.
In came Miss Dolly Hervey: I am sorry, Madam, to be the messenger--but your mamma insists upon your sending up all the keys of your cabinet, library, and drawers.
Tell my mother, that I yield them up to her commands: tell her, I make no conditions with my mother: but if she finds nothing she shall disapprove of, I beg that she will permit me to tarry here a few days longer.--Try, my Dolly, [the dear girl sobbing with grief;] try if your gentleness cannot prevail for me.
She wept still more, and said, It is sad, very sad, to see matters thus carried!
She took the keys, and wrapped her arms about me; and begged me to excuse her for her message; and would have said more; but Betty"s presence awed her, as I saw.
Don"t pity me, my dear, said I. It will be imputed to you as a fault.
You see who is by.
The insolent wench scornfully smiled: One young lady pitying another in things of this nature, looks promising in the youngest, I must needs say.
I bid her begone from my presence.
She would most gladly go, she said, were she not to stay about me by my mother"s order.
It soon appeared for what she staid; for I offering to go up stairs to my apartment when my cousin went from me with the keys, she told me she was commanded (to her very great regret, she must own) to desire me not to go up at present.
Such a bold face, as she, I told her, should not hinder me.
She instantly rang the bell, and in came my brother, meeting me at the door.
Return, return, Miss--no going up yet.
I went in again, and throwing myself upon the window-seat, wept bitterly.
Shall I give you the particulars of a ridiculously-spiteful conversation that pa.s.sed between my brother and me, in the time that he (with Betty) was in office to keep me in the parlour while my closet was searching!--But I think I will not. It can answer no good end.
I desired several times, while he staid, to have leave to retire to my apartment; but was denied. The search, I suppose, was not over.
Bella was one of those employed in it. They could not have a more diligent searcher. How happy it was they were disappointed!
But when my sister could not find the cunning creature"s papers, I was to stand another visit from Mr. Solmes--preceded now by my aunt Hervey, solely against her will, I could see that; accompanied by my uncle Antony, in order to keep her steady, I suppose.
But being a little heavy (for it is now past two in the morning) I will lie down in my clothes, to indulge the kind summons, if it will be indulged.
THREE O"CLOCK, WEDNESDAY MORNING.
I could not sleep--Only dozed away one half-hour.
My aunt Hervey accosted me thus:--O my dear child, what troubles do you give to your parents, and to every body!--I wonder at you!
I am sorry for it, Madam.
Sorry for it, child!--Why then so very obstinate?--Come, sit down, my dear. I will sit next to you; taking my hand.
My uncle placed Mr. Solmes on the other side of me: himself over-against me, almost close to me. Was I not finely beset, my dear?
Your brother, child, said my aunt, is too pa.s.sionate--his zeal for your welfare pushes him on a little too vehemently.
Very true, said my uncle: but no more of this. We would now be glad to see if milder means will do with you--though, indeed, they were tried before.
I asked my aunt, If it were necessary, that the gentleman should be present?
There is a reason that he should, said my aunt, as you will hear by-and by.--But I must tell you, first, that, thinking you was a little too angrily treated by your brother, your mother desired me to try what gentler means would do upon a spirit so generous as we used to think yours.
Nothing can be done, Madam, I must presume to say, if this gentleman"s address be the end.