With what pleasing woe, said the Doctor, do you fill the minds of those who have the happiness to converse with you, and see the happy frame you are in! what you have undergone within a few days past has much hurt you: and should you have fresh troubles of those kinds, I could not be answerable for your holding it--And there he paused.
How long, Doctor?--I believe I shall have a little more ruffling--I am afraid I shall--but there can happen only one thing that I shall not be tolerably easy under--How long then, Sir?--
He was silent.
A fortnight, Sir?
He was still silent.
Ten days?--A week?--How long, Sir? with smiling earnestness.
If I must speak, Madam, if you have not better treatment than you have lately met with, I am afraid--There again he stopt.
Afraid of what, Doctor? don"t be afraid--How long, Sir?
That a fortnight or three weeks may deprive the world of the finest flower in it.
A fortnight or three weeks yet, Doctor?--But G.o.d"s will be done! I shall, however, by this means, have full time, if I have but strength and intellect, to do all that is now upon my mind to do. And so, Sirs, I can but once more thank you [turning to each of us] for all your goodness to me; and, having letters to write, will take up no more of your time--Only, Doctor, be pleased to order me some more of those drops: they cheer me a little, when I am low; and putting a fee into his unwilling hand--You know the terms, Sir!--Then, turning to Mr. G.o.ddard, you"ll be so good, Sir, as to look in upon me to-night or to-morrow, as you have opportunity: and you, Mr. Belford, I know, will be desirous to set out to prepare for the last office for your late friend: so I wish you a good journey, and hope to see you when that is performed.
She then retired with a cheerful and serene air. The two gentlemen went away together. I went down to the women, and, inquiring, found, that Mrs. Lovick was this day to bring her twenty guineas more, for some other of her apparel.
The widow told me that she had taken the liberty to expostulate with her upon the occasion she had for raising this money, to such great disadvantage; and it produced the following short and affecting conversation between them.
None of my friends will wear any thing of mine, said she. I shall leave a great many good things behind me.--And as to what I want the money for --don"t be surprised:--But suppose I want it to purchase a house?
You are all mystery, Madam. I don"t comprehend you.
Why, then, Mrs. Lovick, I will explain myself.--I have a man, not a woman, for my executor: and think you that I will leave to his care any thing that concerns my own person?--Now, Mrs. Lovick, smiling, do you comprehend me?
Mrs. Lovick wept.
O fie! proceeded the Lady, drying up her tears with her own handkerchief, and giving her a kiss--Why this kind weakness for one with whom you have been so little while acquainted? Dear, good Mrs. Lovick, don"t be concerned for me on a prospect with which I have occasion to be pleased; but go to-morrow to your friends, and bring me the money they have agreed to give you.
Thus, Lovelace, it is plain she means to bespeak her last house! Here"s presence of mind; here"s tranquillity of heart, on the most affecting occasion--This is magnanimity indeed!--Couldst thou, or could I, with all our boisterous bravery, and offensive false courage, act thus?--Poor Belton! how unlike was thy behaviour!
Mrs. Lovick tells me that the lady spoke of a letter she had received from her favourite divine Dr. Lewen, in the time of my absence; and of an letter she had returned to it. But Mrs. Lovick knows not the contents of either.
When thou receivest the letter I am now writing, thou wilt see what will soon be the end of all thy injuries to this divine lady. I say when thou receivest it; for I will delay it for some little time, lest thou shouldest take it into thy head (under pretence of resenting the disappointment her letter must give thee) to molest her again.
This letter having detained me by its length, I shall not now set out for Epsom till to-morrow.
I should have mentioned that the lady explained to me what the one thing was that she was afraid might happen to ruffle her. It was the apprehension of what may result from a visit which Col. Morden, as she is informed, designs to make you.
LETTER XXIV
THE REV. DR. LEWEN, TO MISS CL. HARLOWE FRIDAY, AUG. 18.
Presuming, dearest and ever-respectable young lady, upon your former favour, and upon your opinion of my judgment and sincerity, I cannot help addressing you by a few lines on your present unhappy situation.
I will not look back upon the measures into which you have either been led or driven. But will only say as to those, that I think you are the least to blame of any young lady that was ever reduced from happy to unhappy circ.u.mstances; and I have not been wanting to say as much, where I hoped my freedom would have been better received than I have had the mortification to find it to be.
What I princ.i.p.ally write for now is, to put you upon doing a piece of justice to yourself, and to your s.e.x, in the prosecuting for his life (I am a.s.sured his life is in your power) the most profligate and abandoned of men, as he must be, who could act so basely, as I understand Mr.
Lovelace has acted by you.
I am very ill; and am now forced to write upon my pillow; my thoughts confused; and incapable of method: I shall not therefore aim at method: but to give you in general my opinion--and that is, that your religion, your duty to your family, the duty you owe to your honour, and even charity to your s.e.x, oblige you to give public evidence against this very wicked man.
And let me add another consideration: The prevention, by this means, of the mischiefs that may otherwise happen between your brother and Mr.
Lovelace, or between the latter and your cousin Morden, who is now, I hear, arrived, and resolves to have justice done you.
A consideration which ought to affect your conscience, [forgive me, dearest young lady, I think I am now in the way of my duty;] and to be of more concern to you, than that hard pressure upon your modesty which I know the appearance against him in an open court must be of to such a lady as you; and which, I conceive, will be your great difficulty. But I know, Madam, that you have dignity enough to become the blushes of the most naked truth, when necessity, justice, and honour, exact it from you.
Rakes and ravishers would meet with encouragement indeed, and most from those who had the greatest abhorrence of their actions, if violated modesty were never to complain of the injury it received from the villanous attempters of it.
In a word, the reparation of your family dishonour now rests in your own bosom: and which only one of these two alternatives can repair; to wit, either to marry the offender, or to prosecute him at law. Bitter expedients for a soul so delicate as your"s!
He, and all his friends, I understand, solicit you to the first: and it is certainly, now, all the amends within his power to make. But I am a.s.sured that you have rejected their solicitations, and his, with the indignation and contempt that his foul actions have deserved: but yet, that you refuse not to extend to him the christian forgiveness he has so little reason to expect, provided he will not disturb you farther.
But, Madam, the prosecution I advise, will not let your present and future exemption from fresh disturbance from so vile a molester depend upon his courtesy: I should think so n.o.ble and so rightly-guided a spirit as your"s would not permit that it should, if you could help it.
And can indignities of any kind be properly pardoned till we have it in our power to punish them? To pretend to pardon, while we are labouring under the pain or dishonour of them, will be thought by some to be but the vaunted mercy of a pusillanimous heart, trembling to resent them.
The remedy I propose is a severe one: But what pain can be more severe than the injury? Or how will injuries be believed to grieve us, that are never honourably complained of?
I am sure Miss Clarissa Harlowe, however injured and oppressed, remains unshaken in her sentiments of honour and virtue: and although she would sooner die than deserve that her modesty should be drawn into question; yet she will think no truth immodest that is to be uttered in the vindicated cause of innocence and chast.i.ty. Little, very little difference is there, my dear young lady, between a suppressed evidence, and a false one.
It is a terrible circ.u.mstance, I once more own, for a young lady of your delicacy to be under the obligation of telling so shocking a story in public court: but it is still a worse imputation, that she should pa.s.s over so mortal an injury unresented.
Conscience, honour, justice, are on your side: and modesty would, by some, be thought but an empty name, should you refuse to obey their dictates.
I have been consulted, I own, on this subject. I have given it as my opinion, that you ought to prosecute the abandoned man--but without my reasons. These I reserved, with a resolution to lay them before you unknown to any body, that the result, if what I wish, may be your own.
I will only add that the misfortunes which have befallen you, had they been the lot of a child of my own, could not have affected me more than your"s have done. My own child I love: but I both love and honour you: since to love you, is to love virtue, good sense, prudence, and every thing that is good and n.o.ble in woman.
Wounded as I think all these are by the injuries you have received, you will believe that the knowledge of your distresses must have afflicted, beyond what I am able to express,
Your sincere admirer, and humble servant, ARTHUR LEWEN.
I just now understand that your sister will, by proper authority, propose this prosecution to you. I humbly presume that the reason why you resolved not upon this step from the first, was, that you did not know that it would have the countenance and support of your relations.
LETTER XXV
MISS CL. HARLOWE, TO THE REV. DR. LEWEN SAT. AUG. 19.