Monday morning she went to the zoo to begin her volunteer work. She had mounted the Bhutanitis lidderdalii, on a piece of Styrofoam with a piece of paper on it, to keep the b.u.t.terfly"s legs from becoming embedded in the Styrofoam. She"d softened it first, putting it into a jar with damp paper, removed it and placed it on the mounting platform, neatly spearing its thorax-a little to the right-with a #2 pin. She propped it carefully on the wainscoting beside the hawkmoth, and left.
She arrived and found her ID badge waiting for her at the staff entrance. It was a clear morning, warmer than it had been for a week; the long hairs on her brow vibrated as though they were wires that had been plucked. Beneath the wig her shaved head felt hot and moist, the first new hairs starting to p.r.i.c.kle across her scalp. Her nose itched where her gla.s.ses pressed against it. Janie walked, smiling, past the gibbons howling in their habitat and the pygmy hippos floating calmly in their pool, their eyes shut, green bubbles breaking around them like little fish. In front of the insect zoo a uniformed woman was unloading sacks of meal from a golf cart.
"Morning," Janie called cheerfully, and went inside. She found David Bierce standing in front of a temperature gauge beside a gla.s.s cage holding the hissing c.o.c.kroaches.
"Something happened last night, the d.a.m.n things got too cold." He glanced over, handed hera clipboard, and began to remove the top of the gauge. "I called Operations but they"re at their f.u.c.king morning meeting. f.u.c.king computers-"
He stuck his hand inside the control box and flicked angrily at the gauge. "You know anything about computers?"
"Not this kind." Janie brought her face up to the cage"s gla.s.s front. Inside were half a dozen glossy roaches, five inches long and the color of pale maple syrup. They lay, unmoving, near a gla.s.s petri dish filled with what looked like damp brown sugar. "Are they dead?"
"Those things? They"re f.u.c.king immortal. You could stamp on one, and it wouldn"t die.
Believe me, I"ve done it." He continued to fiddle with the gauge, finally sighed, and replaced the lid. "Well, let"s let the boys over in Ops handle it. Come on, I"ll get you started."
He gave her a brief tour of the lab, opening drawers full of dissecting instruments, mounting platforms, pins; showing her where the food for the various insects was kept in a series of small refrigerators. Sugar syrup, cornstarch, plastic containers full of smaller insects, grubs and mealworms, tiny gray beetles. "Mostly we just keep on top of replacing the ones that die,"
David explained, "that and making sure the plants don"t develop the wrong kind of fungus.
Nature takes her course, and we just goose her along when she needs it. School groups are here constantly, but the docents handle that. You"re more than welcome to talk to them, if that"s the sort of thing you want to do."
He turned from where he"d been washing empty jars at a small sink, dried his hands, and walked over to sit on top of a desk. "It"s not terribly glamorous work here." He reached down for a Styrofoam cup of coffee and sipped from it, gazing at her coolly. "We"re none of us working on our Ph.D."s anymore."
Janie shrugged. "That"s all right."
"It"s not even all that interesting. I mean, it can be very repet.i.tive. Tedious."
"I don"t mind." A sudden pang of anxiety made Janie"s voice break. She could feel her face growing hot, and quickly looked away. "Really," she said sullenly.
"Suit yourself. Coffee"s over there; you"ll probably have to clean yourself a cup, though." He c.o.c.ked his head, staring at her curiously, and then said, "Did you do something different with your hair?"
She nodded once, brushing the edge of her bangs with a finger. "Yeah."
"Nice. Very Louise Brooks." He hopped from the desk and crossed to a computer set up in the corner. "You can use my computer it you need to, I"ll give you the pa.s.sword later."
Janie nodded, her flush fading into relief. "How many people work here?"
"Actually, we"re short-staffed here right now-no money for hiring and our grant"s run out.
It"s pretty much just me and whoever Carolyn sends over from the docents. Sweet little bluehairs mostly; they don"t much like bugs. So it"s providential you turned up, Jane."
He said her name mockingly, gave her a crooked grin. "You said you have experience mounting? Well, I try to save as many of the dead specimens as I can, and when there"s any slow days, which there never are, I mount them and use them for the workshops I do with the schools that come in. What would be nice would be if we had enough specimens that I could give some to the teachers, to take back to their cla.s.srooms. We have a nice Web site and we might be able to work up some interactive programs. No schools are scheduled today, Monday"s usually slow here. So if you could work on some of those-" He gestured to where several dozen cardboard boxes and gla.s.s jars were strewn across a countertop. "-that wouldbe really brilliant," he ended, and turned to his computer screen.
She spent the morning mounting insects. Few were interesting or unusual: a number of brown hairstreaks, some Camberwell beauties, three hissing c.o.c.kroaches, several brimstones.
But there was a single Acherontia atropos, the death"s-head hawkmoth, the pattern of gray and brown and pale yellow scales on the back of its thorax forming the image of a human skull. Its proboscis was unfurled, the twin points sharp enough to pierce a finger: Janie touched it gingerly, wincing delightedly as a pinp.r.i.c.k of blood appeared on her fingertip.
"You bring lunch?"
She looked away from the bright magnifying light she"d been using and blinked in surprise.
"Lunch?"
David Bierce laughed. "Enjoying yourself? Well, that"s good, makes the day go faster. Yes, lunch!" He rubbed his hands together, the harsh light making him look gnomelike, his sharp features malevolent and leering. "They have some decent fish and chips at the stall over by the cats. Come on, I"ll treat you. Your first day."
They sat at a picnic table beside the food booth and ate. David pulled a bottle of ale from his knapsack and shared it with Janie. Overhead scattered clouds like smoke moved swiftly southward. An Indian woman with three small boys sat at another table, the boys tossing fries at seagulls that swept down, shrieking, and made the smallest boy wail.
"Rain later," David said, staring at the sky. "Too bad." He sprinkled vinegar on his fried haddock and looked at Janie. "So did you go out over the weekend?"
She stared at the table and smiled. "Yeah, I did. It was fun." "Where"d you go? The Electric Ballroom?"
"G.o.d, no. This other place." She glanced at his hand resting on the table beside her. He had long fingers, the knuckles slightly enlarged; but the back of his hand was smooth, the same soft brown as the Acherontia"s wingtips. Her brows p.r.i.c.kled, warmth trickling from them like water. When she lifted her head she could smell him, some kind of musky soap, salt; the bittersweet ale on his breath.
"Yeah? Where? I haven"t been out in months, I"d be lost in Camden Town these days."
"I dunno.The Hive?"
She couldn"t imagine he would have heard of it-far too old. But he swiveled on the bench, his eyebrows arching with feigned shock. "You went to Hive"? And they let you in?"
"Yes," Janie stammered. "I mean, I didn"t know-it was just a dance club. I just-danced."
"Did you." David Bierce"s gaze sharpened, his hazel eyes catching the sun and sending back an icy emerald glitter. "Did you."
She picked up the bottle of ale and began to peel the label from it. "Yes."
"Have a boyfriend, then?"
She shook her head, rolled a fragment of label into a tiny pill. "No." "Stop that." His hand closed over hers. He drew it away from the bottle, letting it rest against the table edge. She swallowed: he kept his hand on top of hers, pressing it against the metal edge until she felt her scored palm began to ache. Her eyes closed: she could feel herself floating, and see a dozen feet below her own form, slender, the wig beetle-black upon her skull, her wrist like a bent stalk. Abruptly his hand slid away and beneath the table, brushing her leg as he stooped to retrieve his knapsack.
"Time to get back to work," he said lightly, sliding from the bench and slinging his bag overhis shoulder. The breeze lifted his long graying hair as he turned away. "I"ll see you back there."
Overhead the gulls screamed and flapped, dropping bits of fried fish on the sidewalk. She stared at the table in front of her, the cardboard trays that held the remnants of lunch, and watched as a yellow jacket landed on a fleck of grease, its golden thorax swollen with moisture as it began to feed.
She did not return to Hive that night. Instead she wore a patchwork dress over her jeans and Doc Martens, stuffed the wig inside a drawer, and headed to a small bar on Inverness Street.
The fair day had turned to rain, black puddles like molten metal capturing the amber glow of traffic signals and streetlights.
There were only a handful of tables at Bar Ganza. Most of the customers stood on the sidewalk outside, drinking and shouting to be heard above the sound of wailing Spanish love songs. Janie fought her way inside, got a gla.s.s of red wine, and miraculously found an empty stool alongside the wall. She climbed onto it, wrapped her long legs around the pedestal, and sipped her wine.
"Hey. Nice hair." A man in his early thirties, his own head shaved, sidled up to Janie"s stool. He held a cigarette, smoking it with quick, nervous gestures as he stared at her. He thrust his cigarette toward the ceiling, indicating a booming speaker. "You like the music?"
"Not particularly."
"Hey, you"re American? Me, too. Chicago. Good bud of mine, works for Citibank, he told me about this place. Food"s not bad. Tapas. Baby octopus. You like octopus?"
Janie"s eyes narrowed. The man wore expensive-looking corduroy trousers, a rumpled jacket of nubby charcoal-colored linen. "No," she said, but didn"t turn away.
"Me neither. Like eating great big slimy bugs. Geoff Lanning-"
He stuck his hand out. She touched it, lightly, and smiled. "Nice to meet you, Geoff."
For the next half hour or so she pretended to listen to him, nodding and smiling brilliantly whenever he looked up at her. The bar grew louder and more crowded, and people began eyeing Janie"s stool covetously.
"I think I"d better hand over this seat," she announced, hopping down and elbowing her way to the door. "Before they eat me."
Geoff Lanning hurried after her. "Hey, you want to get dinner? The Camden Bra.s.serie"s just up here-"
"No thanks." She hesitated on the curb, gazing demurely at her Doc Martens. "But would you like to come in for a drink?"
He was very impressed by her apartment. "Man, this place"d probably go for a half mil, easy! That"s three quarters of a million American."
He opened and closed cupboards, ran a hand lovingly across the slate sink. "Nice hardwood floors, high-speed access-you never told me what you do."
Janie laughed. "As little as possible. Here-"
She handed him a brandy snifter, let her finger trace the back of his wrist. "You look like kind of an adventurous sort of guy."
"Hey, big adventure, that"s me." He lifted his gla.s.s to her. "What exactly did you have in mind? Big-game hunting?" "Mmm. Maybe."It was more of a struggle this time, not for Geoff Lanning but for Janie. He lay complacently in his bonds, his stocky torso wriggling obediently when Janie commanded. Her head ached from the cheap wine at Bar Ganza; the long hairs above her eyes lay sleek against her skull, and did not move at all until she closed her eyes and, unbidden, the image of David Bierce"s hand covering hers appeared. "Try to get away," she whispered.
"Whoa, Nellie," Geoff Lanning gasped.
"Try to get away," she repeated, her voice hoa.r.s.er.
"Oh." The man whimpered softly. "Jesus Christ, what-oh, my G.o.d, what-"
Quickly she bent and kissed his fingertips, saw where the leather cuff had bitten into his pudgy wrist. This time she was prepared when with a keening sound he began to twist upon the bed, his arms and legs shriveling and then coiling in upon themselves, his shaven head withdrawing into his tiny torso like a snail within its sh.e.l.l.
But she was not prepared for the creature that remained, its feathery antennae a trembling echo of her own, its extraordinarily elongated hind spurs nearly four inches long. "Oh,"
she gasped.
She didn"t dare touch it until it took to the air: the slender spurs fragile as icicles, scarlet, their saffron tips curling like Christmas ribbon, its large delicate wings saffron with slate-blue and scarlet eyespots, and spanning nearly six inches. A Madagascan moon moth, one of the loveliest and rarest silk moths, and almost impossible to find as an intact specimen.
"What do I do with you, what do I do?" she crooned as it spread its wings and lifted from the bed. It flew in short sweeping arcs; she scrambled to blow out the candles before it could get near them. She pulled on a bathrobe and left the lights off, closed the bedroom door and hurried into the kitchen, looking for a flashlight. She found nothing, but recalled Andrew telling her there was a large torch in the bas.e.m.e.nt.
She hadn"t been down there since her initial tour of the flat. It was brightly lit, with long neat cabinets against both walls, a floor-to-ceiling wine rack filled with bottles of claret and vintage burgundy, compact washer and dryer, small refrigerator, buckets and brooms waiting for the cleaning lady"s weekly visit. She found the flashlight sitting on top of the refrigerator, a container of extra batteries beside it. She switched it on and off a few times, then glanced down at the refrigerator and absently opened it.
Seeing all that wine had made her think the little refrigerator might be filled with beer.
Instead it held only a long plastic box, with a red lid and a red biohazard sticker on the side.
Janie put the flashlight down and stooped, carefully removing the box and setting it on the floor. A label with Andrew"s neat architectural handwriting was on the top.
DR. ANDREW FILDERMAN.
ST. MARTIN"S HOSPICE.
"Huh," she said, and opened it.
Inside there was a small red biohazard waste container and scores of plastic bags filled with disposable hypodermics, ampules, and suppositories. All contained morphine at varying dosages. Janie stared, marveling, then opened one of the bags. She shook half a dozen morphine ampules into her palm, carefully reclosed the bag, put it back into the box, and returned the box to the refrigerator. Then she grabbed the flashlight and ran upstairs.
It took her a while to capture the moon moth. First she had to find a killing jar large enough, and then she had to very carefully lure it inside, so that its frail wing spurs wouldn"t bedamaged. She did this by positioning the jar on its side and placing a gooseneck lamp directly behind it, so that the bare bulb shone through the gla.s.s. After about fifteen minutes, the moth landed on top of the jar, its tiny legs slipping as it struggled on the smooth curved surface.
Another few minutes and it had crawled inside, nestled on the wad of tissues Janie had set there, moist with ethyl alcohol. She screwed the lid on tightly, left the jar on its side, and waited for it to die.
Over the next week she acquired three more specimens. Papilio demetrius, a j.a.panese swallowtail with elegant orange eyespots on a velvety black ground; a scarce copper, not scarce at all, really, but with lovely pumpkin-colored wings; and Graphium agamemnon, a Malaysian species with vivid green spots and chrome-yellow strips on its somber brown wings. She"d ventured away from Camden Town, capturing the swallowtail in a private room in an SM club in Islington and the Graphium agamemnon in a parked car behind a noisy pub in Crouch End. The scarce copper came from a vacant lot near the Tottenham Court Road tube station very late one night, where the wreckage of a chain-link fence stood in for her bedposts. She found the morphine to be useful, although she had to wait until immediately after the man e.j.a.c.u.l.a.t.ed before pressing the ampule against his throat, aiming for the carotid artery.
This way the b.u.t.terflies emerged already sedated, and in minutes died with no damage to their wings. Leftover clothing was easily disposed of, but she had to be more careful with wallets, stuffing them deep within rubbish bins, when she could, or burying them in her own trash bags and then watching as the waste trucks came by on their rounds.
In South Kensington she discovered an entomological supply store. There she bought more mounting supplies and inquired casually as to whether the owner might be interested in purchasing some specimens.
He shrugged. "Depends. What you got?"
"Well, right now I have only one Argema mittrei." Janie adjusted her gla.s.ses and glanced around the shop. A lot of morphos, an Atlas moth: nothing too unusual. "But I might be getting another, in which case . . ."
"Moon moth, eh? How"d you come by that, I wonder?" The man raised his eyebrows, and Janie flushed. "Don"t worry, I"m not going to turn you in. Christ, I"d go out of business. Well, obviously I can"t display those in the shop, but if you want to part with one, let me know. I"m always scouting for my customers."
She began volunteering three days a week at the insect zoo. One Wednesday, the night after she"d gotten a gorgeous Urania kilns, its wings sadly damaged by rain, she arrived to see David Bierce reading that morning"s Camden New Journal. He peered above the newspaper and frowned.
"You still going out alone at night?"
She froze, her mouth dry, turned, and hurried over to the coffee-maker. "Why?" she said, fighting to keep her tone even.
"Because there"s an article about some of the clubs around here. Apparently a few people have gone missing."
"Really?" Janie got her coffee, wiping up a spill with the side of her hand. "What happened?"
"n.o.body knows. Two blokes reported gone, family frantic, that sort of thing. Probably justrunaways. Camden Town eats them alive, kids." He handed the paper to Janie. "Although one of them was last seen near Highbury Fields, some s.e.x club there."
She scanned the article. There was no mention of any suspects. And no bodies had been found, although foul play was suspected. ("Ken would never have gone away without notifying us or his employer. . . .") Anyone with any information was urged to contact the police.
"I don"t go to s.e.x clubs," Janie said flatly. "Plus those are both guys."
"Mmm." David leaned back in his chair, regarding her coolly. "You"re the one hitting Hive your first weekend in London."
"It"s a dance club!" Janie retorted. She laughed, rolled the newspaper into a tube, and batted him gently on the shoulder. "Don"t worry. I"ll be careful."
David continued to stare at her, hazel eyes glittering. "Who says it"s you I"m worried about?"
She smiled, her mouth tight as she turned and began cleaning bottles in the sink.
It was a raw day, more late November than mid-May. Only two school groups were scheduled; otherwise the usual stream of visitors was reduced to a handful of elderly women who shook their heads over the c.o.c.kroaches and gave barely a glance to the b.u.t.terflies before shuffling on to another building. David Bierce paced restlessly through the lab on his way to clean the cages and make more complaints to the Operations Division. Janie cleaned and mounted two stag beetles, their spiny legs p.r.i.c.king her fingertips as she tried to force the pins through their glossy chestnut-colored sh.e.l.ls. Afterwards she busied herself with straightening the clutter of cabinets and drawers stuffed with requisition forms and microscopes, computer parts and dissection kits.
It was well past two when David reappeared, his anorak slick with rain, his hair tucked beneath the hood. "Come on," he announced, standing impatiently by the open door. "Let"s go to lunch."
Janie looked up from the computer where she"d been updating a specimen list. "I"m really not very hungry," she said, giving him an apologetic smile. "You go ahead."
"Oh, for Christ"s sake." David let the door slam shut as he crossed to her, his sneakers leaving wet smears on the tiled floor. "That can wait till tomorrow. Come on, there"s not a f.u.c.king thing here that needs doing."