Emily gave another weak smile and glanced toward Gavin’s office. “Is he available?”
Natalie nodded. “Yep. He just finished up a meeting, so you caught him at a good time.”
“Thanks, Natalie. I’ll catch up with you on my way out.”
“Sounds good,” she said, reclaiming her seat, her attention focused on the ringing phone.
Nerves instantly spiking again, Emily headed for Gavin’s office. With a quick knock, she pushed open the door. Her heart clenched the moment her eyes landed on Gavin’s smiling face. Little did he know she was about to throw a corkscrew in his day. Phone in one hand, he signaled for her to wait with the other. She sighed, taking in his relaxed demeanor. Suit jacket off and tie loose around his neck, he lazily rocked in his leather chair, talking business. Dropping her purse onto his desk, Emily settled on his lap, hoping she wasn’t crus.h.i.+ng him. He slid his arm around her waist, his hand ma.s.saging her belly. Trying to calm her anxiety, she ran her fingers through his soft black hair. G.o.d, she loved this man, but she couldn’t help but feel as though she was the devil about to deliver bad news.
“That’s exactly what I want to hear, Bruce. We’ll be in touch.” On that note, he hung up, his grin contagious as he gazed into Emily’s eyes. “A midday surprise.” He brushed his lips along her jaw. “Are you presenting yourself as lunch to me?”
Emily pulled in a breath, her mind telling her to just come out and say it. No skirting around. No hesitation. Just say it. Wrapping her arms around his shoulders, she pressed her forehead to his. Her eyes locked on those mystifying baby blues. “There’s a blood paternity test. It has no risks, and we can have the results in days. I know we’re almost at the end of this road, but we could find out a few weeks early. We can finally be done with this… this waiting.” Emily watched his face pale. Watched those beautiful eyes cloud over, desolation replacing the playfulness they’d held less than a minute ago. She felt his strong, hard body sag.
His hand dropped from her stomach as he looked away… then his whispered words sank her, gutted her open. “I’ve known about the test for a couple of months.” He brought his eyes back to hers.
His statement bounced around in Emily’s head. Staring at his face, bleeding something parallel to shame, she tried to swallow. She felt dizzy as she stood, resting her hand on his desk for balance. “You’ve known?” she breathed, her eyes misting over with tears and confusion. “You’ve known about it and didn’t say anything to me?”
Gavin rose and brought his hand to her cheek, but she flinched away. For a second, he found his voice trapped, felt his heart sink. He knew the lie he was harboring would upset her, but h.e.l.l, her reaction was tearing him apart. He nodded, stepping back. “I have.”
“For how long?” she asked, her voice cracking.
“After we found out it was a boy.” Gavin looked at the floor, remembering the day he couldn’t keep his curious fingers from clicking around the internet. A son. His possible son had fueled a need so deep within him to see if there were other options, he’d thought he was going crazy. He spent half the day online. Once he found out they could have the answer so fast, fear shot through him. Frozen in front of his computer, Gavin realized the answer may not be what he wanted to hear, what he needed to hear. It also brought on a slew of f.u.c.ked up emotions he wasn’t prepared to handle. For the most part, he felt Emily was carrying his child, but as he stared at the screen, his faith vanished.
“That was months ago, Gavin.” Emily swiped tears from her face, shocked at how long he’d known. “I don’t understand. Why would you keep this from me?”
Stepping closer, he shoved his hand though his hair. All he wanted to do was touch her, console her, but her defenses were up, so he would tread. “I was buying time.” He spoke softly and stared at her face as it became further dowsed with confusion. “That’s it. I was buying time.”
“Buying time? Time from what? We can’t stop the inevitable. But we could’ve stopped Dillon from being at every doctor’s appointment.”
Gavin shook his head, his fears tumbling from his mouth. “No, we couldn’t have. He’s the father. Not me.”
Emily swallowed back a breath at his admission. Her knees went weak. The man before her revealed something he’d hidden so naturally, so effortlessly over the past several months. She didn’t know whether to scream at him or cry for him. However, she knew he did it for her. She could never deny his natural instinct to always protect her feelings. He’d sheltered her by keeping his fears to himself. As she watched his spirit break right before her eyes, she decided to reveal something as well. Something she’d started feeling the last few months but didn’t recognize what it was until now. A pull so internal, so warming, she thought it was going to melt her. “You are this baby’s father, Gavin Blake. Do you hear me?”
Gavin stared at her a long moment, sour thoughts invading his mind. He wanted to believe her, but he couldn’t. His words came out as a whisper. “I’m not, Emily. He is.”
Heart shattering, Emily stepped closer and reached for his hands. She molded them to her belly as the baby tried to kick his way out. Staring into Gavin’s weary eyes, she cupped his cheeks. “You are the father, and I’ll tell you how I know,” Emily cried, pressing her lips to his. “I know because I can feel every bit of you running through my veins. Your blood, your heart, your soul. I can feel it. I feel his love for you. Every time you talk, he moves. Every time you laugh, I swear he vibrates like he’s sharing the joke with you.” Sliding her arms around his neck, she twined her fingers in Gavin’s hair and buried her face against his chest. “I know you can feel him moving, Gavin, and he knows it’s his father’s hands on my stomach. He knows it.”